If You Weren't My Brother

Summary: It was a love confession twenty-four years in the making. It was the last thing Michael ever expected, even after the night before.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything!

XxX

It all seemed too real to be real; their arms around each other, the warmth of their bodies against each other, the kisses, the touches, their hearts racing, the sting of his first penetration, the moans, the orgasm, Gob sobbing against his neck, the aftermath of their sin. Michael doesn't want to believe it, but he does. He wasn't supposed to feel like this, and yet he does. He loves Gob, his brother. But he doesn't expect Gob to feel the same way.

He expects Gob to leave soon after, thinks this was just a fuck to him, but instead Gob's arms remain around Michael and he kisses him. It's clear that this is something more than one night of sex. Gob doesn't say anything, he's too emotional to say anything. He's trying to keep the tears from falling but he fails. They fall asleep, tangled in the bed sheets.

In the morning Michael wakes up sore. Gob isn't in bed or in the room at all. There's an old, wrinkled sheet of paper on the pillow beside Michael's head. He picks it up and looks over the messy printing covering the page. He smiles as he reads the title: If You Weren't My Brother.

I think life would be much more simple,

If you weren't my brother.

But sadly you are, and this is wrong.

The truth is I love you unlike any other.

I hate our fights, because I'm afraid I'll hurt you.

I hate hiding the truth, and even more when I show it and you don't see.

If only I could get it over with and tell you,

If only I could tell you what you really mean to me.

Don't you see it in my eyes?

Don't you hear it in my voice?

Don't you feel it in my touch?

I'd do anything and everything for you,

But it seems even that isn't good enough.

I wonder what would happen if I told you,

But then I have to stop.

I know you'll hate me,

A fact during my affectionate moments I forgot.

I don't think I could ever stop this feeling,

Because inspite of everything I believe this love is true.

Inspite of everything I won't give up.

I'll wait forever just to be with you.

That's when Michael remembers when they were teenagers, how sometimes Gob would write things in his 'journal', and how sometimes when Gob was writing he'd look over and stare at Michael thoughtfully before continuing. Michael always wanted to ask what it was that Gob was writing and hiding from everyone else, but he never did because he was afraid he'd just embarrass Gob. He has a good idea this was what he was hiding. Love. It doesn't seem possible, but there's the proof staring him right in the face. Gob must have been hiding these feelings for a long time.

There's another, smaller note underneath the poem, saying: Went to break up with my girlfriend and move out of her place. I'll be back this evening after my show. - Love Gob.

There's that word again, love, and as crazy as it sounds, Michael believes it.