Things were fairly normal at the moment for seven year-old Harry Potter; he was taking a stroll to clear his head of the odd thoughts he was having lately, mainly thoughts that were not all that nice or that a child should never even think of such as burning down his relative's house with them still inside of it. That particular thought happened the day after he had been locked in his cupboard for playing with one of Dudley's old and broken toys that he had not touched in ages.

He recalled listening to the TV that night as well, his interest had been drawn to the sound after hearing Vernon going off about freaks running wild in a place called Gotham.

"I bet if I went there, I could find someone that likes me... maybe..." Harry muttered quietly as he started to kick a rock down the pathway, he continued his little action and kept thinking of what his life could be if he could find just one person that would care about him when he felt a warm sensation on the back of his neck. The sensation usually accompanied his very bad thoughts but he had also learned that this was a warning of when something back was going to happen to him very soon. Looking behind him, Harry saw his baby whale of a cousin with his group of friends and quickly started running, knowing from experience that they had most likely decided to play a game of 'Harry Hunting'.

'I don't want to be a punching bag my whole life,' Harry thought as he turned a corner, Dudley and his gang not too far behind him. When he reached a dead-end and heard them getting closer, he started to panic. Frantically searching for anyway to escape, a single thought kept repeating in his mind: 'I wish I could be anywhere but here!'

When Dudley and his group turned into the alley, they were confused that Harry was nowhere in sight. They searched the area before leaving to see if he had slipped away and gone in a different direction.


Harry was shocked to see the vast change in area around him; he had somehow appeared in a large city, which did not seem like London at all, from the way everything way built, and also it was suddenly nighttime. Looking cautiously around the area he was in, he simply thought, 'Where am I?' He was suddenly jolted from his thoughts by a very loud alarm going off. Turning, he caught sight of two figures saw running from a nearby bank. One, a woman, was wearing a black and red jester's outfit while the other seemed to be wearing a purple suit and both of them had their faces done up in white make-up. He stood staring at them and would have kept staring if the woman had not crashed into him causing the both of them ended up on the ground.

"Ow, watch where you're going!" The woman exclaimed as she picked herself up.

Harry was about to reply when he saw what looked like a spotlight projecting an odd shape onto the clouds and he decided to ask what it was.

The man looked up and let out a laugh, his grin stretching inhumanly widely, before turning to the woman, "As much fun as it would be to play with the Bat, we don't have the time. Come on Harley, I don't want to go back to Arkham so soon after getting out."

"Who's the Bat?" Harry asked, drawing disbelieving looks from the two of them, "…what?"

"You don't know who Batman is!" The man asked. Harry shook his head in response causing the man to grin and grab him by the arm and leading him off, Harley following close behind. "Batman is a dark figure that wants to stop poor people, such as ourselves, from trying to get ahead in life! He always shows up, beats the living sh-uh stuffing out of me and gets me arrested and thrown into Arkham, even though I can get out of there whenever I want."

"So… Batman is a bad guy?" Harry reasoned, trying to keep up with the odd man and just barely avoiding tripping in his worn out shoes.

"To us he is," Harley said, opened the door to the getaway car and tossing the loot inside and, after a moment's hesitation, putting Harry inside as well before jumping into the driver's seat.

"I can see this being the start of something quite interesting," The man said with a laugh as he jumped into the passenger seat, "What's your name, kiddo?"

"Harry Potter," he replied with a smile, these two were interesting and he liked their costumes also, they were nice to him at least nice in comparison to the Dursley's.

"Name's Harley Quinn," the woman spoke up as she started up the car and drove away from the scene.

The man smiled widely and shook Harry's hand, giving him a slight shock due to a joy buzzer he had palmed in his hand, he laughed before introducing himself, "Joker."


Harry sat on a stool, hands firmly folded in his lap after getting too curious earlier and accidentally setting off a gas canister. Harley had simultaneously pulled him away from the escaping gas, turned it off, and forced him to sit where he was now. As he watched the two of them, there was something he was dying to ask, "Um…if it's not rude to ask, why are the two of you dressed up like that? I don't think Halloween is anytime soon." The look the two of them gave him made him regret asking and fearing if they would hit him for doing so, "Never mind, you don't have to tell me that was rude."

"You bet it was rude," Harley yelled. Harry automatically covered his head with his arms, anticipating a hit but was confused when it didn't come. "Why'd you do that?"

"Sorry, a habit I guess. My aunt and uncle would hit me if I asked questions," Harry explained as he slowly brought his arms down. The odd silence that came after the statement was broken when Harry's stomach decided to inform everyone that it was very empty, to the embarrassment of Harry, "Is there anything to eat?…if it's not too much to ask."

"It you want to survive, your best bet is if Harley here goes out to get food…last time she tried to cook, she either nearly burned down the hideout or it came to life and tried to eat us!" The Joker said, quite seriously before degenerating into laughter.

"My cooking ain't that bad!" Harley pouted.

"Harley, you have the ability to defy the laws of everything by being able to burn water!" Joker cackled before quickly running away to avoid been hit by the mallet that Harley was suddenly wielding.

"Um, if you have anything that's still good, I can try to make something," Harry cut in, watching as Joker bare avoided being hit, "I always had to cook for my relatives," He saw the odd look on their faces, "…what?"

"There's no way someone your age knows how to work a stove, never mind know how to cook," Harley stated, setting the mallet down.

"Want me to prove it to you?" Harry responded seriously. Several minutes, a large pile of rotten food thrown out and various dishes and utensils cleaned later, Harry set down in front of the three of them a batch of small eggs, which were actually quite good. "If I can cook and do other things around here, can I stay?"

"If every meal you make is like this, not only will I let you stay, I won't threaten your life!" Joker announced, quickly devouring his food.

Harry was both relieved and confused at the Joker's statement but brushed it aside, besides, people who looked like clowns could not be all that bad.

Joker kept things as the table entertaining by telling tales of the 'evil' Batman and all of the tools that he used to hurt people with, Harry liked the stories even though he was scared by them. All too soon, Harry's eyes started to droop slightly despite his attempts to stay awake to hear more of the stories. Finally he gave up the fight and laid his head down at the table and fell asleep. Joker paused mid-way through his current tale when he noticed that his most excited audience member was no longer in the realm of those who were awake.

"He looks so cute," Harley fawned over the boy's sleeping form before prompting a question, "Where are we gonna put him, Mister J?"

"Put him on a spare bed or couch or something, I've got to plan things," Joker said dismissively as he stood from the table and walked off.

Harley shrugged her shoulders before carefully picking up Harry slowly, as not to wake him, and noted that he was a lot lighter than his claimed age of seven. She chose to set him down in an old couch and, after a few minutes of searching, covered him in a blanket and tucked him in.


Harry was confused, he felt so small and yet he felt safe too. He tried to move but his arms flailed uselessly as he let out a noise of annoyance.

"Settle down Harry, it's time for bed," a kind voice intruded on his actions. Harry moved his head towards the sound, to the best of his abilities, and barely made out a face framed by red hair. He knew instinctively that this was someone he could trust, the reason he felt so safe even though he could not do much in his current state. The person moved towards him and planted a kiss on his forehead before moving away, smiling.

'Are you my mum?' He tried to ask but all that came out was gibberish, to which the she laughed kindly.

She face turned away from him suddenly as a loud crash sounded in the room next to the one he was in. Harry whimpered from a combination of her turning away from him and the loud noise, he started crying when the door to the room was kicked in and he saw a dark figure step into the room and ordered her away from him. Before his view was blocked, he saw that the person threatening them had pointed ears on the top of his head. 'That's Batman! Mum run, he'll hurt you!' He tried to warn her, but once again his words only came out as incoherent babbles. He heard her speaking to Batman, but could not make out the words when Batman grew tired of her getting in the way and drew out a batarang and proceeded to stab her with it. As the woman dropped to the side, Batman advanced on Harry causing him to start screaming and crying in response.

"Harry, Harry!" a voice cut through the noise and the darkness to bring him back to the world of reality.

Harry finally awoke and quickly latched onto the closest thing next to him and held on tightly, "Don't let him get me mum, keep him away!"

The person that Harry had grabbed was a concerned Harley Quinn that had heard the commotion and had woken him up from his nightmare. She gently stroked his hair, soothing him with her touch and words, and also vaguely registering that he had called her his mother.

The Joker walked into the room, wondering what the hell was going on and saw Harley and Harry, "…is this a bad time to ask you to go get some donuts?" He barely avoided being hit with a heavy object; whether it was a brick or a book he could not really tell, and quickly vacated the room.