A/N: Breaking Dawn spoilers! Not much but the first few chapters.
The light of the moon illuminated my surroundings; bringing them to life in a manner that I'd rarely seen. It was large in the sky, almost as if I could touch it, though I knew it was miles upon miles away from my grasp. My eyes were glued to the craters that no one could see without a microscope. Something about the moon always threw me into the beauty that made it glow like an all powerful god in the sky.
My palms rested on the water, feeling it pulse under my hands with each wave that came in. I was sure by now anyone else would have lost balance even a little bit. The water was warm, melting me, and I felt the pull to go back and dive again. My hair was still dripping, and I felt warm all over. I had to wonder if she would notice.
My eyes fell closed, utter blackness was all I could see, but I listened to the inside of the cottage. For some reason she'd taken a shower. Probably for the same reason I dove into the darkness of the ocean – trying to release the nervousness. My wife, I was going to spend this with my wife. She'd married me, agreed to me buying all the frivolous things I'd been dying to give her, and she'd pledged to me her life. Surely I could give her this one small thing, couldn't I?
I could think of no one who I would want to this with other than her. That's why I spent so long alone, in solitude without my significant other. Now that I had her, I would be damned if I gave her up so easily. Inside the house, I could hear her digging through things, the sound of a brush combing through her mahogany locks, the padding of her feet as she paced anxiously.
I'd expected her to wait for a few moments, to fool around with other things, but the glass door rolled open and I could hear her heart beating in a strong rhythm. She was just as nervous….
Her breath hitched for moment, and I knew then that she'd spotted me, or my clothes hanging on the arched tree back on the beach. I wondered if I'd scared her, that the reality was finally hitting her now that we were completely and utterly alone. No one could hear us; there was nothing here on the island besides the small forest and distant rocks. Would she want to leave? To leave me?
I swallowed back the venom that had created a lump in my throat, but found it was still there. The sounds of her footsteps grew closer, and I felt the pressure of relief flow through me. The sound of fabric hit me, and I realized she was taking my lead, dropping what she had on to the branch where my clothes rested. I swallowed again. Would I even be able to do this?
I could hear her footsteps faintly against the powdery sand. She was so quiet, almost like a ghost, but I could hear the strong pumping of her heart in my ears, it was the only thing that kept me from insanity at the moment. The tension was building in me, and I was suddenly a scared teenage boy. All the calmness and control I had slipped from and I opened my eyes to the moon again, praying that I could keep myself in check.
Her movement in the water pressed waves up against my lower back, and I could smell her scent even more when she was in the water. Her small, warm hand laid on top of mine gently, letting me know she was there, but it was impossible for me to concentrate on anything but her. My wife, my Bella, my mate. I swallowed and tried to regain the confidence that I had before.
"Beautiful," Bella murmured beside me. I could hear the small tremor in her voice, the way her breath was controlled, but had an anxious vault to it.
"It's all right," I told her. I didn't want her to be scared, or upset, or nervous. I knew I was, but I had reason to be… but then again, so did Bella. I could potentially kill her, and she thought nothing of it.
I turned to her then, finally facing her, and I was correct in my assumption that she had removed her clothes. My eyes had no trouble staying fixed on hers. I felt the urge to travel every inch of her skin, to see what had been kept from me for so long, but I could wait a little longer. I twisted my hand so our fingers laced together, she looked back at me with those warm brown eyes and suddenly everything felt right.
"But I wouldn't use the word beautiful," I murmured quietly. "Not with you standing here in comparison." She smiled at me, not a nervous smile, but an adoring one; the very one she gave me when we were announced husband and wife for the first time.
Her hand that wasn't twisted with mine reached up slowly to my heart. Her skin was luminous in the moonlight, and for the time, we didn't look so different. I forgot about all of our separations, that I could kill her tonight, that I was a monster, and I felt like I was a man on his honeymoon. My body shuddered under her hand, and I breathed out roughly, trying to formulate what I needed to say.
"If… if I do something wrong, if I hurt you, you must tell me at once." She nodded her head, and then walked towards me so our chests were pressed together. My eyes closed at the feeling of our bare skin connecting for the first time.
"Don't be afraid," she murmured. "We belong together."
Her voice was so strong in that moment; so much conviction was held in her voice that I couldn't doubt it. I couldn't bring myself to think to think this was a mistake, and I wanted this so much more than I had thought. Not only to be with Bella for an eternity, but to be able to hold her in my arms and love her like she deserved to be loved.
"Forever," I vowed for the second time that day. We swayed gently in the waves and I pulled us deeper so the water touched her collarbone.
Bella's hands trailed up my torso, feeling every muscle while she kissed my chest and neck. Her feather light touches drove me mad and my eyes slipped closed. Her arms wrapped around my neck and we kissed after a long, exhausting day. Her lips were so warm, and so soft. I wanted nothing more than to devour her, but I waited for her to lead. I couldn't think of what to do, though I had mentally prepared myself, my nerves were on end.
I could feel every line of her soft, porcelain body pressed against mine. My hands caressed her back and down her rear. She gasped against my mouth and I froze. Had I gone too far? Was this too fast? Bella met my eyes and she smiled shyly.
"It's okay," her arms moved down my chest and copied my move by squeezing my backside tightly. Even in the glow of the moon, I could see her cheeks fluster and hear her heart thump under the water. I chuckled and bent down to kiss her again, she smiled against my lips, and I could tell we were getting the hang of this.
Rubbing my hands and down her soft skin, I could feel her perfect little bottom cupped in my hands. How many times had I thought about this very moment? And yet, here I was, living it, and I was still in shock. I slid my fingers across the backs of her thighs and lifted her up. Her legs wrapped around my waist, and her arms around my neck.
We both froze when her warm, moist center touched my stomach. Even through the water I could feel what was her, and what was the ocean. She blushed and hid her head in the crook of my neck. I knew she was nervous, I could feel every movement that was slowed with anxiety, but I would make her feel comfortable by the end of the night.
I waded my way through the water and back onto the shore. Bella finally looked up and gave me a confused look. Winking at her, I continued my way towards the beach. I laid her gently onto the wet sand was on top of her in that same instant. I kissed her again, in that moment I could see nothing but her. Those warm brown eyes, her full pink lips, her soft translucent skin. I could easily make a hundred page list of what I loved about her.
"Why did you do that?" she asked me.
I smiled at her and dipped my head to her collarbone. "Don't most couples fantasize about making love on a beach?" she giggled and I chuckled with her.
"Most, but I think you get sand in… places." I could hear the blood rushing and smiled. She already had a collection of sand in her hair just from lying on the beach.
"Alright, then maybe another time." She shrieked when I jumped up, carrying her bridal-style to the cot. Her legs wiggled back and forth while she clung to me. It was strange how we were nervous one moment, and then playful the next. I was suddenly praying the honeymoon stage would last for a while longer.
Plopping her down on the large bed, I crawled on top of her again. "This is nice," she sighed, stretching her arms and legs out beneath me. She seemed to notice the obvious fact that we were both nude in that moment, and with a flush, her arms covered her breasts from my view.
I frowned at her, and she looked past me, out of the open glass door. "Don't," I whispered. "You're beautiful."
She looked up at me, her eyes suddenly sad, and I knew I'd make her see. I gently took her hands and pried them from her arms, her fingers slid across her skin, and stopped so her breast were barely covered. Removing her hands slowly, I pulled her finger to my lips and kissed them gently. My eyes met hers and she bit her lip in a sultry manner.
"I'm sorry…" she whispered.
Cocking my head to the side, I asked, "For what?"
"I'm not… adequate." My heart felt a tug and I growled at her. Bella's eyes popped open and I sat her up so that she was eyes level with me.
"Don't you ever say that again. You're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen, and I don't deserve you." She raised her eyebrows in confusion, and I resisted the urge to roll my eyes.
"Edward–" I cut her off with my lips before she could continue. I wouldn't let her doubt this; that she was the only one I could ever love. The apple of my eye, and my wife.
"No," my voice was light, a whisper in her ear. My hand reached to cup her breast and she gasped. "Nothing could make me happier than this moment right now." I could smell the salt in her eyes as she began to cry, and I wondered if I'd hurt her in my sudden movement. When I started to pull away her small hand covered mine over her breast.
Her eyes were full of tears, but they weren't sad, they were… happy. The love in those brown orbs was enough to make my body feel warm, as if every nerve came to life just to be able to feel the love that Bella was giving. I more-or-less tackled her to the bed, not willing to wait any longer than we had.
My fingers danced over her breast, touching the taut nipple. Her body writhed under mine, and I hadn't even begun yet. I could only watch as her body began move and her back arched off of the bed. I wanted more, though. In that moment I could feel the primal part of me wanting control, but I would let Bella feel what she gave me.
My free hand moved down her stomach, feeling the smooth skin down to her hips. She bit her bottom lip and looked up at me again, her eyes darkened into an almost black. Curiosity got the better of me, and I moved my fingers lower, circling the growing warmth until I was rubbing my finger up and down.
The cry that left her throat made my muscles tighten and my already thick erection harden. Her body writhed and when I stuck my finger lightly inside of her, goose bumps rose all over her body. I watched in amazement while she wriggled and whimpered my name. Could this be possible? Every time I imagined us together I saw blood and tears. But now, the tears were in front of me, but first of love, and now of overwhelming pleasure.
"Ed… ward…" she whimpered. My body tightened while she gave me a lusty look. I could only swallow while her legs wrapped around my hips, pushing me slowly toward her.
"Are you sure, Bella?" I hesitantly asked. I didn't want to stop, now that I was at this point I wasn't sure if I could make myself stop, but if she wanted me to, I would try.
"Yes," she whispered, tears forming again. "I love you."
"I love you, too… more than you'll ever know." She smiled at me, a sincere, encouraging smile, while I pushed forward.
The tip of my erection slid into her, and I was abruptly overwhelmed by the searing warmth and wetness. Bella moaned and threw her head back; I tried to ignore the baring of her slender throat and rocked my hips before pushing in. Her eyes snapped open and I could hear teeth snap in an attempt not to scream.
The scent of blood came over me, and I tried to ignore it. I had thought I was all but immune to her scent by now, but our situation, knowing she was here alone and so weak beneath me made venom flow wildly. She looked back at me, already panting and nodded me on. I wondered if she was doing this for me, trying to play it off as nothing.
"Edward… please…" she panted. Her voice was husky and breathy, and in that moment I had no choice but to obey her. I pushed into her, further this time and then slowly slid out. Her gasping cries egged me on further.
Bella's hips rose to me with each thrust I made. Her head lolled into the pillows behind her, and I could see the pulsing off blood behind her skin. My fingers dug into her arm before I could stop them, and I knew I was losing control. Her body began to become even tighter around me, and my senses thrilled to the feeling.
I instinctively pulled my head to her neck, licking the skin there. I could taste the sweet perspiration on her neck and I panted her name in a groan. Just a taste wouldn't hurt. No one would find out and I could suck the venom back before it did any damage… no!
I pulled my head, clenching my teeth before I bit through the soft, fragile skin. My head slammed into the pillow beside her head, while my thrust continued on. Her scream echoed through the room and I could feel myself going to the edge, everything in me was tightening in anticipation. I growled and ripped the pillows beside me. The feathers exploded while I continued to shred them in an attempt to stifle the powerful blows of my orgasm. If my hips hit too hard I could break her so easily.
I groaned as I felt myself go, sighing in relief when I heard her panting and mumbling my name. Her heart slowed and I could smell the blood coming down from her high. I rolled to my side and onto my back. Never had I experienced something like that, and I prayed it wouldn't be the last. I smiled to myself. I didn't hurt her…
My eyes snapped open and I was suddenly upright. Her lips were swollen, but there was a slight smile on them. How could she smile? But I had just been grinning to myself. Her arms were covered in light red marks that matched my fingers, they were already starting to form bruises across her pale skin.
Oh god, what had I done to her? Giving her a once over, I didn't see anything else. There was some blood on the sheets, but nothing that couldn't wait until morning, and a little mark on her right hip, but nothing more.
I laid on my side, pulling a blanket on top of her and let it really sink in. I'd hurt her, I'd hurt the one I loved. What had I done?
A/N: Not too explicit, I tried to focus more on Edward's control. Even though he's strong, if it came down to this, where he was doubting himself, I think he could have problems. Plus, who didn't laugh at "I bit a pillow. Or Two. But that's not the point." XD I thought this was cute, I had a grand old time writing it, too.
I want to do a couple more scenes from the book, so look for spoiler warning before reading if you don't want to stumble across them.
Apparently there's a huge backlack against Breaking Dawn. There's been reported get-togethers of people burning the books. Now there's this thing on Amazon or something that says to return them, not burn them. I just stumbled across this a little while ago. I guess lack of explicit sex scenes and the whole Jacob tandom didn't make people too happy.
Though, I must admit, one of my favourite Edward and Bella moments was in Jacob's part. The hands on the tummy. X3 I think I cooed at that part.
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