Fandom: Torchwood

Characters/Pairing: Jack/Ianto, Gwen, Owen and Tosh.

Disclaimer:I don't own Torchwood all belongs to RTD and the BBC

Warnings: Pre-Reset.

A/N: These Oneshots were written for a challenge on Lj but thought I'd stick them up here too.

Please review. Cheersies :D

Jack was sitting in his office frowning at his coffee cup in consternation.

It appeared to be empty.

His coffee cup was empty.

Jack's coffee cup hadn't been empty for more than five minutes at any one time for the last two years. If Jack's cup was empty, then something terrible must have happened. Getting up quickly Jack moved to his door, "Gwen, what's going on?"

Gwen looked up quickly and minimised the internet window that she had been looking at. Jack's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "What are you looking at?"


"Was that a question or an answer, Gwen?"



"Yeah, nothing."

Jack rolled his eyes, "Let me see, Gwen."




"Gwen, I can order you to let me see."

Gwen glared at him and opened up the window with an angry huff. Wedding dresses. Wedding dresses. She was looking up wedding dresses.



"You do know that we are a top-secret alien-hunting organisation."

"I was aware of that, Jack, yeah."

"And so instead of hunting aliens you are looking up wedding dresses."

"Well, we've been receiving reports of aliens taking over a bridal shop in Newport so I was just compiling a file, doing some research…you're not buying any of this, are you?"


"What did you want, Jack?"

"Where's Ianto?" Jack asked. Gwen frowned up at him and then looked to her coffee mug which was sitting conspicuously on her desk. She picked it up and weighed it carefully in her hand, then turned it and looked into its coffee-less depths.

She looked back up at Jack, "I dunno, not here. There's no coffee."

Jack rolled his eyes, "Yes, Gwen, I had noticed."

"Oi!" Came a shout from the autopsy bay, "Where's the coffee?" A moment later Owen came up to the workstations looking grumpy, bedraggled and still half asleep, he scowled at Jack. "Where's Ianto?"

Jack threw his hands up in exasperation, "How am I supposed to know?"

"Well, for one thing he's your employee, B. you're shagging him and thirdly where is my bloody coffee, I swear to God, Jack, if I don't get some coffee right now, I will go on a homicidal murder spree with that fire axe!"

"Gwen, pull up the CCTV for the Hub, see if you can find him."

Gwen slumped against her keyboard and put her head down on it, her eyes fluttering, "I don't know if I can, Jack, without coffee, I'm too weak, you'll have to go on without me."

Jack gave a snort of annoyance and tried to push Gwen out of the way. Owen and Gwen started to laugh and Jack ignored them bringing up the CCTV onscreen and searching through for any signs Ianto.

Jack had been searching in silence for twelve minutes before Gwen's voice broke the silence, "Where's Tosh?"

Jack spun around, "Tosh?"

"Yeah, Tosh, has anyone seen her this morning?"

Jack and Owen shook their heads. Owen's face lit up as inspiration suddenly dawned, "Hey, you don't think that the two of them are…you know?"

"No way."

"Come on, Jack, they spend lots of time together, they have all those stupid jokes that no one else gets…"

"And they always go for coffee together and Ianto did save Tosh from those cannibals."

"No way, they're just friends. Just because you two can't understand the difference between having platonic friends of the opposite sex and being fuck buddies, doesn't mean other people are the same."

Gwen and Owen were suitably chastised and shut up.

They lapsed into silence as they contemplated what their missing colleagues could be doing.

"Harkness." Owen said, rounding on Jack accusingly, "Have you done anything to piss Ianto off recently?"

"What? No!" Jack exclaimed as Gwen turned to glare at him too. He held his hands up in a 'hey-I'm-innocent-stance'. "I didn't do anything. If anything pissed him off, it was the way Owen said his coffee was below par yesterday."

"Oh my God, you didn't!"

"It was cold! By the time Jack had stopped harassing him and he got around to me the coffee was freezing! So technically, it's Jack's fault!"

Any more accusations were put on hold when the cog door rolled open suddenly and Tosh walked in followed by a sodden Ianto.

"What the hell happened?"

"Where have you been?"

"Where's my coffee?"

Ianto looked up at them bemusedly, trying to process the three questions that had been asked at the same time. Tosh saved him the need by laughing and ushering him towards the sofa.

"Ianto and I were getting some coffee," She answered blithely.

Jack looked at Ianto; his suit was completely drenched; water was running out of it onto the concrete floor, creating a puddle around him. His hair was stuck flat to his head and his white shirt was gone see-through. Nice.

"Getting coffee?"

"Yeah, but on the way back, this little girl got away from her mother and ran off the jetty, into the water, so Ianto jumped in and saved her."


"Yeah, he just jumped right in after her." Tosh beamed proudly and squeezed Ianto's shoulder.

"In your suit?" Owen asked incredulously.

"No, Owen, I took the time to take my suit off, carefully hang it up, then I jumped in."

"Then how did your suit get wet?" Gwen asked.

Ianto rolled his eyes but didn't respond as he was trying to get the chattering of his teeth under control. He glanced wearily up at Jack who had been uncharacteristically silent up to this point. Jack was watching him in a way that made Ianto groan.

"You're a hero, Ianto!"

"Jack.." Ianto's cheeks flushed but despite the warmth in his cheeks he shivered miserably.

"Right, come along hero." Jack said pulling Ianto to his feet, "We need to get you out of those wet clothes. Then you deserve a reward. I'll let you wear my coat! This is the hero coat."

He ushered Ianto towards his office and called back over his shoulder, "Ianto and I are taking the day off, you guys take care of any emergencies."

"What about my coffee!?"

"Forget about it Owen," Tosh said as the door to Jack's office slammed shut, "No Ianto-coffee for you today."

"Right I warned him, Tosh, pass me that fire axe."

Thanks for reading!