A/N: The chapters will be longer than the prologue! So I didn't plan on writing a new story but when that plot penguin dances I have no choice. This is actually taken off from another idea that I had where Edward has sex with Bella and he basically holds her hostage till she agrees to marry him. I couldn't figure out how to make a multi chapter story so I dumped it. I like this idea more. It's a lot different from what I usually write but it was too good of an idea to dump off. I don't think anyone has ever written anything like this…I hope not.

Summary: All human. Edward and Bella meet each other at a bar. They get drunk and hit it off. Edward admits that he won't have sex till marriage. Bella, on a whim, asks Edward to marry her – he agrees. What a shame that Edward doesn't believe in divorce…

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.

"Why get married and make one man miserable when I can stay single and make thousands miserable?"
-Carrie P. Snow

Till Death Do Us Part:
This Why I Don't Drink Hard Liquor

I never drink hard liquor. In fact, if it was anything besides an apple martini, I didn't touch it. But today was special. My best friend, in the entire world, was getting married and it was my job, as the maid of honor, to drown my sorrows in hard liquor so I can numb the pain of realizing that I was the last of my friends that was still single.

"Bella," Jessica, the bride to be, wrapped her arm around me and banged her beer bottle against my empty shot glass. "I love you so much." She gave me a wet kiss on my cheek and started to chug down the rest of her Bud Light. Jessica was a light weight when it came to drinking.

"I'm going to get me more drinks." I told her as I pulled myself away from the place I was sitting on (I was too drunk to know if it was a couch, stool, chair, booth, or the floor that I was pretty sure someone had just puked on).

Everything was spinning. I grabbed onto the first object that my fingers could wrap around and held it still. I think it was trying to move, or maybe that was me. The object grabbed onto my arms and helped me get onto my feet again. I hadn't realized that I was falling.

"Are you ok?" The object asked.

I looked up at the object, which turned out to be a really hot guy, and nodded. Then I started to cry. The undertone of his question had hit the nerve. I wasn't ok. My best friend was getting married and I was still single. I wrapped my arms around the obj – I mean man – and buried my head in his chest. He rubbed my back awkwardly and started to drag (seriously, he was dragging me, my feet had somehow stopped moving) to a booth on the other side of the bar – at least I think it was a booth.

I buried my face into my arm when I sat down and grabbed a bunch of the beer nuts that was placed in a bowl in front of me.

"Are you ok Miss?" The guy that had dragged me across the bar asked. I was pretty sure that was his hand rubbing my back.

I pulled my face away from my arm and frowned at him. He was kneeling beside the booth and frowning back at me. It was the first time that I really looked at him, at least I think it was a him, god I really hope he was a him. His hair was like this weird brick red color, his eyes were a piercing green, and he had a strong chin. He wasn't bad looking.

"You're not drunk enough to understand the emotions that are feeling me right now." I sobbed at him.

"The emotions that are feeling me right now?" The guy repeated what I had just said and made it into a question.

I nodded at him and wiped the tears that had stained my cheeks, when I noticed the beer nuts that were still in my hand and so I ate them. I knew that if I cried long enough I would sober up and I didn't want to be sober at the moment.

"I'm going to go get more drinks." I told the guy as I tried to pull myself away from the booth.

"No," He held out his hand. "I'll get us the drinks. You just stay here and try to act sober. I don't want you to get in trouble for being publically intoxicated."

I nodded and pushed myself back into the booth.

"What are you drinking?" The guy asked pulling himself to his feet.

"Anything that's dark." I looked up at him. "And I don't like ice, so make sure that there's no ice in it. I might choke myself and then die."

The guy nodded once and turned around to go to the bar and get the drinks. I banged my head onto the table and waited patiently for him to come back with my drink. At the moment I would drink anything, as long as it ensured me that I wouldn't get sober anytime soon.

A good amount of drinks later…

"You," I leaned across the table and pointed at the man that had just bought me a large number of drinks. "Are drunk." I accused.

He laughed loudly and slammed his hand onto the table between us. "This is coming from the person that just had an hour conversation with me about how penguins are ugly and Happy Feet makes children believe that they have to set trends and be just like everyone else to be accepted."

"It does," I leaned back and smiled at him. "It starts out with a penguin that is out cast because it can't sing and in the end instead of everyone accepting the penguin as being different, they all have to learn how to dance to, so it's like –" I stopped talking so I could find the word I wanted to say.

"I think I like you." The guy, who had bought me my drinks and who had somewhere in the conversation told me his name was Edward or Edwin or something that started with an 'e', told me.

"Then we should spend the night together." I dropped the idea of finding the word that I wanted to say in the sentence before his statement. "I don't usually sleep with men, in fact I think you're the first, but it'll be fun." I reached across the table for his hand.

"Nope," Edwin shook his head. "I'm waiting till marriage."

I started to nod. "That's perfect," I stopped reaching for his hand and banged my hands flat onto the table. "I want to get married."

"Are you asking you to marry me?" Edward (I wasn't sure what his name was so I was just calling him random names that started with an 'e' in my head) asked.

"I think so." I nodded. "That's where we stand in front of a preacher and he tells us that we're going to have to spend the rest of our lives with each other, right?"

Eric nodded.

"Then let's do it!" I slammed my hands onto the table and pulled myself out of the booth.

Ethan stared up at me in shock. "You can't be serious?" He was laughing.

"If you want I can kneel down and ask, though I'm not sure if I'll be able to get back up and I don't' think I have a ring though." I started to pat at my dress to make sure that I didn't have one – I didn't.

"Ok," Evan pulled himself away from the booth and stood in front of me. "We can get married but you have to be the girl."

"Gotcha," I raised my thumb in the air and smiled at him. "This is going to be the start of a beautiful relationship."

End Prologue.

A/N: So this is kind of short. I know. I wanted to get the background story out. The next chapter will be the morning after the wedding and the reactions they have to each other while they're sober. The chapters will also be longer (if you read my other stories you'll know this). So, y'all know the drill. If this is a keeper, leave a review. Before you ask! Because I know you will. There might (most likely) be lemons in this. I haven't decided yet. If you like it, review it. I want to know if it's worth continuing. Oh and I promise the next chapter for Beautiful disaster will be released soon. It's a difficult chapter to write.

Daddy's Little Cannibal