A Different Kind of Triage

Authors Note: Spoilers for Season 3 of Battlestar Galactica RDM! Spoilers for all of MASH! Thanks to Mari for the title, I was really stuck on this one.

Summary: The first in a series of ficlets about the MASH Doctors in the Battlestar Galactica 2003 Universe. Hawkeye deals up close with the 'skin jobs' on New Caprica, and he'd thought the Army Brass had been bad.


Cylon Occupied New Caprica

"Possible hemothorax, this one goes first. Wait strike that, he goes second, this head trauma goes first. For the gods sake, someone get Charles' ass out of bed? This is gonna be a long night." Hawkeye Pierce, former Colonial MASH doctor and now one of the few doctors left to humanity stood up and shook the cobwebs out of his head. He'd been having such a great dream, or well, as close to a great dream as one could have on this spawn of Hades planet.

"Dr. Pierce, may I have a word with you?" A Three interrupted his morbid and tired thoughts. He could never keep the Cylons straight, was this the nice Three, the serious Three, or the insane Three? A random thought stuck him in the midst of all the chaos, "They need little name tags, 'Hi, My name is 'Angry Three' how may I help you." Hawk shook his flight of fancy away and concentrated on the hurt woman in front of him.

"What, I'm a little busy," he yelled over the hubbub as Margaret and her crew of 'pick up' nurses did the best they could with the limited drugs and bandages. He thought he saw Erin Hunnicutt pitching in here and there. In other circumstances a fifteen year old doing the work of a wartime nurse would have disgusted Hawkeye and offended every sense of right and wrong. All he felt right now, though, was relief that someone competent was helping Margret and Kellye with the influx.

Hawkeye examined his next patient, a young woman who was 7 or 8 months along in her pregnancy. "Pulse dropping, Margaret, get her to B.J. now or her baby isn't gonna make it. You should prep for an Imperial Section just in case," He looked down at the now unconscious pregnant woman.

The former Major sighed as she came over to access the patient, "Already done Hawk," she pursed her lips, "Resistance or Cylon? Not that it matters I just want to know who…"

"If you want your shipment of antibiotics, I suggest you get over here, NOW! Dr. Pierce," The Brother Cavil interrupted the nurse and doctor. Hawkeye noticed that the Three and the Cavil stood over a body somewhat worried, or about as worried as the human models ever looked in front of their 'subjects'.

"Yes imperious leader," he mumbled under his breath, "keep your bolts screwed tight," his quip earned a snort and a small smile from Margaret.

"To what do I owe the honor?" Hawkeye said as he loped over to the two skin-jobs, not that he'd be caught dead calling them that out loud. He looked down at both the Cavil and the Three, "We're a bit busy here, if you don't mind."

"I want you to put her in the front of your triage line," he ordered.

Hawk knelt down next to the Cylon, a model Six, belly and chest wound, she probably needed a bowel resection and based on the breathing he'd bet the proverbial farm there was a hemothorax. Plus he'd be spending a few hours digging out shrapnel, which would be touch and go. All in all…

He sighed, here came the fight, "Look, I might, and I stress might, be able to save her, but it would take hours and drugs I just don't have."

Cavil dug his feet in, "I don't care, she needs to be…"

"No, I'll not put her in front, she'll take up resources, there's a very good chance she'll die anyway, and she'll bump back more important patients who don't download into a nice pretty spaceship when they die." God he hated this.

The Three put her hand on the shoulder of the Cavil, Hawkeye never could figure out who was in charge of whom with the Cylons, looks like the Three wore the pants today.

"I understand Doctor, can you at least…" The Brother Cavil stormed off interrupting the seemingly well meaning Three.

"It's against my Asclepian oath," Hawkeye said quietly, "You know, do no harm to others?"

"Is it not also part of your oath to relieve suffering? She is suffering."

Hawkeye glared at the Three, before taking a deep breath, and responding, "Go talk to Klinger. Ask him for the Hades Weed concentrate."

"Hades Weed?"

"It's a local plant. We refine it and make a strong knock out drug." Hawkeye grimaced, obviously not liking whatever he was gonna say next. "A swig knocks most people out for a few hours, we don't know for sure but more…"

The three interrupted him, "I think I understand, thank you Dr..."

Out of the corner of his eye Hawkeye noticed Radar scurrying about collecting and tagging possessions of the dead and wounded. "Radar, just the guy I needed!" Pierce said in his usual gregarious manner. Which, he noticed, surprised the Three out of whatever she was about to say.

"Everything ok Hawk?" the former clerk held his clipboard tightly as he approached the surgeon and the Six. Radar's nervousness around the blond bombshell Cylon was palatable. For some strange reason this amused Hawkeye a little bit. You had to take your humor where you could find it. That was something everyone understood now. It made him a little sad actually.

"Go find Cottle and see what he can take, I wanna move some of the less serious cases to that side of tent city. Maybe even a serious one or two once we get them stable."

Radar was nodding furiously throught the entire exchange. "Give this to Klinger," He shoved his clipboard in Hawkeye's hands and ran toward the main 'road' which was the fasted way to the other side of Tent City.

Hawkeye's razor sharp glare shifted back to the Cylon. "Now, if you will excuse me, I have other patients to attend to, and I don't kill if I can avoid it. Asclepian oath and all," he then stormed off, leaving a somewhat confused and relieved Three in his wake.


End Notes:

I used an English translation of the German term for a Cesarean Section. Since there was no Caesar in colonial history and thus no historical figure for the procedure to be attached to, I couldn't call it a Cesarean Section. (How Caesar got attached to the procedure is a long story in and of itself)

Also, You'll find out how the MASH crew got to New Caprica and how things work in a little bit. Be patient.

Yes, Radar is still Radar even though the colonial Radar is called Dradis. There's gonna be a reason for that. After 7 or so seasons of calling him Radar on the show, Dradis just didn't feel right. Everyone is keeping their names and ranks. I'm working up explanations and work arounds when earth army ranks don't quite fit the BSG universe.