Sasori is the perfect Nerd. He's smart, shy, and...Pregnant.

Sasori was a nerd, or "Pinocchio" (Because He Hated To Lie) in his high school, until one night with the legend of Sunagakure High:Deidara. Leaving him smitten, confused, and knocked up. How he is pregnant is not the concern for Sasori right now, he has to worry about his paranoid parents finding out their grandchild they fantasize about is only nine months away, or maybe the main concern is that Deidara always wanted children and would sue for the custody of his child, IF he knew he had one...or maybe the problem lies in the fact the whole school thinks Sasori is a whore because of Deidara's lies about Sasori sleeping with him to get Deidara to give him money, which he has tons of, considering he's a rich kid. But what matters most to Sasori, above anything else, is to try and decide a future for his unborn child.

Sasori's POV:

Month 1:

Blog Entry 003:

Date Posted: Aug 28, 7:00 AM:

I'm Pregnant. And I'm A BOY.

"Yeah, like anyone's gonna believe THAT."

'Well, believe it' I keep telling myself as I type at my computer. I still can't fully understand how, though. One day I was fantasizing about my first time and that night I did it, and it wasn't even that good. Of course my first time happened over the Summer, which was about two weeks ago, I just took a test at 6:00 this morning, that was because I felt nauseous. After my second up chuck that hour I assumed it was time to find out what was wrong...apparently I was pregnant, that's what the test said, now all I have to do is find out if this is really a baby. I still don't believe it for sure, so I'm going to my friend's house for the truth, since her brother is a doctor.

I guess the only reason I would ever think I was pregnant was because I had sex with another boy, not even a boy, he was like eighteen, incidentally, I am 16. Another reason would be that I was on the bottom, or "Uke" is what my friend calls it. She sometimes grosses me out, like one time she kept talking about her old beau who she screwed like five times, and she kept saying everything sexually and in detail, I eventually threw up all over some guys lunch tray, he beat me up afterwards. She was even the reason I met my first time, and he started to beat me up, too. I can't blame him though, I'm considered a nerd in my high school. Everyone calls me "Pinocchio", that being because I hate to lie, that name started way back in middle school, when I told on some jocks who drew graphite all over the walls, the teachers asked me, so I told the truth. I've been treated like a nerd AND a jerk ever since.

Hopefully this pregnancy is just a screwed up test. How could I even get pregnant? I'm a guy!

I began to shut off my computer, then I heard my door open. I looked over to see my father standing in the doorway, I got up from my chair and began to get my stuff together. My dad looked around my room and sighed. "What is it, dad?" I asked, my dad just looked at me happily. "I'm just so amazed that you keep your life so organized." my dad said, I shrugged. "It's not that organized right now." I said, I looked over at my trash can, I guess I'm going to have to take out the trash myself, since there was a pregnancy test marked positive in my trash this week.

"I'm going to stop by Inuko's house, is that okay?" I asked, my dad frowned. "You know how your mom and I feel about her." my dad said, I nodded, "Yeah, but she's not that bad. It's not like she does drugs or drinks, she's just...well.." I began to loose my point. My dad looked at me with a serious expression, "She has sex all the time, she's a slut." my dad said, I shook my head. "She doesn't have sex all the time, she's only done it with two guys, please don't call her a slut." I said in my usual polite way, I guess that's why my father likes me so much, I don't really do anything but study and keep as low-profile as possible. My dad would never suspect I had sex, not until I was married to the girl that I was ready to spend the rest of my life with.

My dad sighed, "You're right, Sasori. It's not any of my business what your friend does in bed." my dad looked at me, "But It's both your mom's and my business what YOU do in bed. You're not ready for sex, there's way too many emotions that come with that, you're far too young to even be thinking about that. But one day you'll meet a girl who's just right and you'll have sex AFTER your married, then you'll have a beautiful child together and end up happy, unlike the OTHER kids who DIDN'T wait to have sex, understood?" my dad said, I usually listened to my dad when he said this kind of stuff, but right now I was worried that I had done worse than disobey my father and have sex, I might even be up the spout. And to think it was all because of one night.

"Um, dad, I want to ask you something." I said, my dad looked at me, "What do you need, Sasori?" my dad asked.

"When mom was pregnant with me, what did you do to prepare?" I asked, my dad looked shocked. "You didn't get a girl pregnant, did you?!" my dad snapped, I shook my head, "Nope, I never had sex with a girl. I never even thought about it, I just want to know what you did." I said, my dad looked relieved. "Well, for starters she took prenatal vitamins, and she ate all the right foods, things that have proteins and other things that strengthen the fetus during pregnancy. Also, I don't think It's good to do too much walking or exercise, but it could help with labor, and that's all you need to know until your ready." my dad said and then walked out of the room. I stood there for a moment, and put a hand on my stomach.

"I may be ready now, dad." I said when he was finally gone. I got my stuff together and headed downstairs, I went into the kitchen to say goodbye to my mom, but she wasn't there, so I went on over to Inuko's place.

As I walked down the road to Inuko's place, I looked around the neighborhood and took in the sight of all the houses. I remember when all the houses were new and looked alike, now they look a little older and have many differences, like one house had an entire second floor put in. I should mention on the way to Inuko's house I have to pass through a very rich neighborhood, including the house of my first time. I always hear stories of when the nerd and the popular kid/bully were friends when they were kids, but that was never my case, in fact, if it wasn't for Inuko I wouldn't have had any friends at all.

When I finally got to Inuko's place, where her and her brother live together, since their parents are often gone on business trips, I knocked on the door and received the usual treatment with Inuko's famous password thing y, she never lets anyone in but her friends, my first time is not her friend, since he called her a ho.

"What's the password?" Inuko asked.

"Do I have to? It's important...and sexual." I said.

"Oh, if It's sexual then you come in free!" Inuko said happily, she opened the door and looked shocked when she saw me at the door. "O-M-G, YOU did something sexual?!" Inuko said with her mouth agape, I nodded, "I think my eggo is prego." I said, Inuko looked at me confused, then shrugged. "Well, It's not that bad, come in." she said, opening the door and letting me in.

"So, how did this blessing from Kami come to be?" Inuko asked happily, I shrugged, "It was at camp, we went to my cabin to look for something, and we came out six or seven hours later." I said. Inuko looked at me like I was lying, I knew that look, I told her before I had sex with a girl, and she knew it was a lie, "I'm serious, I did it two weeks ago. With a GUY, you think I would lie about gay sex?" I said, Inuko shook her head. "Is this for real? Did you really do it? Was it good? Wait, you said you were pregnant?" Inuko asked, she can be quite a handful sometimes, so I guess I'll answer those in order.

"Unfortunately, yes. It really happened, we did it till 2:31 AM, It was horrible sex, and I think I might be pregnant, that's why I came to you." I said putting a hand on my stomach, Inuko held her hand up to her mouth, taking a breath in. "Is that humanely possible? Your a guy, right?" Inuko asked, I shrugged, "All I did was take a pregnancy test, I don't know for sure. All I know is that I was nauseous since I had sex, so I thought it was worth a try." I said. Inuko seemed to understand, so she went upstairs and got her brother downstairs, pulling him by the arm. "I want you to draw his blood, Nii-San. He has a problem only a needle can solve." Inuko said, her brother sighed. "Fine, but I'll have to charge you." her brother said, Inuko slapped him across the face. "No! It must be kept secret! It's very sexual!" Inuko scolded, her brother shrugged, "Well, Sasori IS like part of the family." her brother said, he went to get a needle and tubes, leaving me and Inuko in her living room.

"So...who's the baby daddy?" Inuko asked trying to get dirt out of me, I shook my head, "No, there's no baby daddy." I said, Inuko whined at this, I shook my head again. "I'm not even sure I'm pregnant, just leave it be." I said, Inuko sighed, "Fine, keep all the fun stuff to yourself." Inuko pouted. Her brother came back into the room with the needle a couple minutes later, telling me to sit on the couch so he could take a sample of my blood.

"Alright, hold still, like you're really THAT scared." Inuko's brother said, he knew I was fine with this stuff, I was an easy some ways more than others. I held out my arm and let him take the blood he needed, when he finished he put a bandage on my arm and put the blood in a device to scan it. Her brother looked shocked at the results, holding them up to Inuko, who gasped in delight.

"Sasori, you're gonna have a baby!" Inuko squealed, I knew that sex was too bad to be just suckish sex, but I pictured something more along the lines of AIDS than pregnancy. Go figure.

"What are you gonna tell you parents?" Inuko's brother asked.

"Not this." I replied, Inuko clapped. "Yay! I love secrets like this! This is gonna be fun!" Inuko cheered. I stared at her, "Trust me, It's NOT gonna be fun. You know my social status now, just think of what It'll be like when I start showing." I said, Inuko thought for a second, then gasped. "What?" I asked, "You're not even considering abortion? Good choice! Keep it in the oven!" Inuko cheered, I slapped my forehead, "Let's just go to school." I said, Inuko got her bag and we headed out the door.

(A/N: Consider right now It's playing the bleeped out version of

As me and Inuko walked through the halls of Sunagakure High, we passed by every single thing we saw every day. There were the emos, the jocks, the cheerleaders, and my first time...wait, my first time?! Why am I looking at him? Is he looking at me? Oh, he's looking at every girl's ass that goes down the hall, not me...lousy jerk. Inuko noticed me staring at my first time and waved a hand in my face. "Shmellooo." Inuko said, that's her version of "Hello".

"What?" I asked, Inuko stared over at my first time. "Deidara? Why are you looking at Deidara?" Inuko said raising an eyebrow. I looked down, "Oh Kami." Inuko gasped, I nodded.

"Deidara is the father." I said sadly, Inuko stared at me for a second, then laughed. "I'm serious." I said, Inuko just laughed harder, "No way! Deidara's straight!" Inuko chuckled. I glared at her, "He did it with me. And he seemed happy." I said, Inuko had tears coming out of her eyes now. "He likes GIRLS! He only does it with GIRLS! Ha!" Inuko laughed, Deidara seemed to notice Inuko's laughing fit and came up to her.

"Hey ho, why're you laughing like a monkey, yeah." Deidara smirked, he looked over at me quickly, then looked away. Inuko came off her fit and glared at Deidara, "You sicken me!" Inuko hissed, Deidara raised an eyebrow. "What did I do to you? Your the one who disgusts everyone, and your friend Ronald McDonald over there is even worse. Don't push your luck cause you just look dumb, yeah." Deidara said, Inuko growled, I just looked away from Deidara.

"What's wrong, you scared, yeah?" Deidara asked, I just kept silent, letting Deidara pick on me.

"Leave him alone! He's got a lot of stress from stuff at camp!" Inuko said, Deidara's eyes widened, he pulled me away from Inuko and into the boys bathroom. "What did you tell her?!" Deidara snapped, I frowned, "What I'd tell my best friend, we had sex." Deidara covered my mouth, although no one was in the bathroom but us. "Don't tell her crap, yeah! It was great sex but your a guy! And a nerd, the worst nerd, yeah! I'll die socially if you tell anyone!" Deidara hissed at me, I nodded, "Okay, no one will know, I promise. You think I WANTED to have sex with you?" I said, Deidara smirked.

"That might just be the only sex you'll ever have, yeah. Your just a nerd, no one likes you." Deidara said, then he walked out the door. I put a hand up to my stomach.

"I'll try to hide it the best I can, Deidara. But only for so long." Then I walked out and to my first class.

End of Chapter 1.

This is not a Sasori x OC fic! I don't do that! She's only to add comedy, people!

Next chapter is gonna be Month 2, It's one month per chapter.