A/N: I'm know I'm suppose to be writing the epilogue of 'Photos of only you' and you're all angry at why I wrote this instead. No avail, I'm still in the midst of wrting that very long one shot epilogue. Terribly sorry to the bottom for keeping you from finding out the end. I couldn't help myself to writing this...so I hope you enjoy it as much as my previous one-shot. This story is actually set in my own original story, so pardon me there about the places. I used the Mai-Otome names and they are quite of the character.
Tad sorry again! Enjoy!
She passed me twice.
She was in a rush. The bottles of water were disappearing faster than she could go around distributing them. I watched her silently as the passengers around asked her for more. Her eye brows were knitted together in frustration, and her face showed clear discontent with what was happening around her, but she managed a grin or two for the passengers. She seemed so angry with everything, but there was an air around her that told everyone she loved her job despite everything.
By the time she finished the distribution of the second batch of water, she was sweating terribly. Even though it was a tad bit cold in the carriage due to winter, she didn't look pleased in enjoying the cool temperature. She had her uniform jacket on; I was sure that made her warmer by the minute. Everyone in the carriage had their coats, sweaters and jumpers off, she apparently didn't realise she had her one on. She adjusted her cloth cap with her free hand and slung the holder over her shoulder, with that she passed me for the third time.
The third time is always the charm.
Her emerald gaze met mine in a glimpse and I shuddered with excitement. I held the bottle of water she had given out to me earlier in my hands and smiled to myself, I had never seen such beautiful eyes before. The young boy that sat opposite me bounced happily in his seat while most probably the brother beside him quietly watched the white plains pass. It snowed this morning before I boarded the train, it was a soft snowfall and it was quite a sight to see. I pulled the cork out of the small glass bottle and placed it to my lips.
I felt a surge of warmth rise in my chest. If it was my lips on hers, everything would seem like a dream. The young boy noticed my actions and followed after me enthusiastically, he popped open the cork and held the bottle tightly with both of his hands. His eyes gleamed in excitement as he looked at the water through the clear glass. His brother seemed to have noticed his action and warned him not to spill it all over himself. I watched them as the older took out a small handkerchief from his chest pocket and wiped the younger mouth after he had the bottle pulled away. I looked at my handkerchief I had taken out; it lay on my lap with the cork of the bottle on it. If I was the one that would be wiping her perspiration off her face, I was sure someone would be jealous of me.
I chuckled behind my hand at that thought and it caught the attention of the young man. I felt embarrassed when he looked at me awkwardly; the boy smiled with his teeth and raised his bottle to me; I felt even more embarrassed. I pushed the cork back onto the bottle top and held it on top off my lap. To my surprise, the boy copied my movements and gleamed at me after what he had done.
The carriage had gone quiet, there was still some chit chat going around, but the talk was nothing like noise. It was peaceful in a way. The older of the two caught my gaze as I looked at the young boy opposite me,
'He seems to have taken a liking of you.'
He scratched his head full of black hair absentmindedly. He gave me a meek smile and patted his brother's head,
'It is his first time on a train, I thought he would be scared, but it looks like I have gotten it wrong.'
The boy gave out a huge grin and hugged the bottle of water to his chest. I gave him back a warm smile and met with the blue gaze of the young man, as I knew he was staring in admiration. A tint of pink brushed onto his face before he knew and I passed him a quick smile.
Sometimes I hate myself for being beautiful.
My father always said I looked like an angel, everyone else said I looked like heaven itself. I prefer the angel… Maybe I am…or not, people do not get to see it until their up close; that my eyes are of deep scarlet that match the red flames of a devil's lair. How ironic. I touched my face with my free hand, the other holding tightly onto the bottle, and I sighed quietly. The young boy had gotten up from his seat and moved over to sit next to me, I looked down at him and realised how adorable he was. His brother had apparently found that out too and tried to call him back over to his seat,
'Kino, come back here. Don't go and bother Miss…'
I looked from the young boy to the young man. Oh my, he just indirectly asked for my name. I gave out another smile,
'Miss Viola, I'm sorry for his behaviour, it seems that he's more excited than ever.'
I felt the young boy reach out to touch my hand that held the bottle. He grabbed onto one of my fingers and smiled. I was very surprised. His brother was much more surprised,
'Kino! Come back over here now!'
The younger stuck out his tongue in response to his brother's command and held firmly onto my finger. I chuckled again; I have never sat on a train and have this kind of commotion happen to me before. I decided to play with them so I transferred the bottle to my other hand and held the boy's hand properly. He need not to hold just a finger. His brother looked at him in desperation so I eased his worries, and it came along with a genuine smile,
'It is fine actually; I do not mind having such an adorable company.'
The small boy that went by the name of Kino looked up to me in utter glee and held onto my hand even tighter. His brother gave up and slumped back onto the seat, this time it was his turn to pop the cork and gulp down water. I felt my sleeve get tugged by Kino and I answered him with a look, he showed me his white teeth,
'My name is Kino.'
He pointed over to his brother, who looked at me,
'That is my brother, Tobi.'
The older gave a humble nod and followed after his younger brother,
'Tobi Toraqia. We come from the Land of Arri.'
I looked on with surprise; I have never been to Arri before. Before I could drift into my world of fantasy, Kino unexpectedly complimented me,
'Did you know? You are very pretty!'
This time I blushed.
Kino fell asleep on my lap after all his excitement had turned to exhaustion. His brother had kept up a sweet-laced conversation with me after that. I irked these kind of conversations, all they wanted to know was me. I didn't know myself any better. I nodded here and there, and answered some very direct questions. I thought it was never going to end, until I realised that the next round for distribution for water was now.
She passed me again.
I saw her back first, I didn't realise it was her until I remembered her long dark coloured hair that seemingly gave of the colour of deep royal blue. I then realised that her back was broad and toned, it gave off a sense of security and safeness. I shuddered out of excitement again, this time with a rush of blood, it pumped up my adrenaline. I didn't know that she would come to my seat so quickly that when she call for my attention, I was caught in a crossfire of words.
'Ma'am, would you like another bottle of water?'
While Tobi asked,
'Would you tell me your full name?'
I heard both so I answered both, but I was looking in her direction when I answered. I realised that I shouldn't have said,
'Yes! I would like another; my name is Shizuru, Shizuru Viola.'
It came out sounding so weird that I flushed in embarrassment and covered my face with both of my hands to hide my foolishness. Little did I notice too, that I let go of the glass bottle I had earlier and it went tumbling down onto the floor of the carriage.
It crashed and sounded into a many small fragments that it caught everyone's attention and woke Kino up from his slumber too. I felt so clumsy at that moment, yet before Tobi or I could do anything about it, she stepped in steadily. She brought the wooden holder that held the bottles of water to her side, bent down calmly and started to pick up the broken glass onto her bare hands. I wanted to stop her, those hands which I wanted to hold since her third pass, I didn't want them to carry my fault. However, she spoke before I could even bend forward,
'Be careful. I hope that you're not hurt.'
I looked at her, crouched over my mess. Our eyes met up close for the first time and I felt my heart race, my face flushed…that I was very sure. She gave me a lopsided smile and with her smooth low voice she spoke to me,
'I'm sorry that I have disturbed your conversation. Here is your bottle of water.'
With that she took out a bottle of water from her holder and held it out to me. I watched her other hand place that broken pieces into the holder, I had a feeling that she would be getting a scolding later of why she came back with a broken bottle. I hurriedly accepted the bottle from her hand and looked straight at her solid gaze she held on me. However it broke when she pulled back to ask Tobi the same question as she did with me.
Tobi asked for another while I looked at the one she had passed to me, I didn't want to open it. I just wanted to keep it safe within me so it wouldn't break like the other I had previously. It hurt so much just to see that break into pieces… I felt her eyes land on me and I looked up to see her pull back from our area. Our eyes met in another kiss and I heard the unexpected,
'Have a good day Miss Viola.'
I wanted to scream! She actually took in my ridiculous answer to her question. Kino fell back asleep when the commotion ended quickly; he fell back onto my lap and dozed off. Tobi looked at me in confusion when I smiled and giggled for the first time. I sounded like a little girl, just without her candy.
I turned to watch her slide the door to move to the next carriage and before her walked over, I was sure she looked at me.
This time she grinned.
I thought she had magic for I swore she walked right out of the carriage wall.
I blinked hard twice and realised that it was a sliding door that was camouflaged with the corridor wall. She was wiping her hands on her shirt and in her mouth she had a pair of white gloves. I stood there in the middle of the corridor just looking at her. She seemed to have noticed me standing there for she brought her head to my direction and a shocked expression covered her face for a split second…before it faded away quickly. I swallowed my saliva slowly and took a step back, unsure whether I should continue down to my destination. I had to…the cabins were on the other carriage.
I played with my dress absentmindedly; I stopped when I noticed that she was looking at my hands. A blush crept up my face and I looked away; I felt so much again like a little girl. My eyes looked out of the windows onto the white plains now dressed with a few green pine trees here and there. Everything was passing quickly that I thought time was passing as fast. The light orange glaze was pulled across the sky and in the distance I could see the shadows of night. It seemed she wanted my attention for her voice brought my pink cheeks into a darker shade, I looked back at her.
'Miss Viola, dinner is now being served in the third carriage. The carriage is in that direction.'
She pointed behind me, and I didn't turn.
I opened my mouth but closed it soon after, I already knew there was food…I just simply lost my appetite when I watched the waiters bring in the food. It felt odd. I clasped my hands in front of my body and bit my lip. I didn't know how to answer her this time.
She scrutinised me under her emerald gaze, and I shivered involuntarily.
'Is there something wrong with the food?'
My throat felt parched all of a sudden and I just couldn't answer.
'If something wrong, I can ask…'
'No. Nothing's wrong. I…I…'
I managed something out, finally. However I realised again that it sounded as weird as before, something must have gotten into me to get me into such a state. I sighed softly; I was not one of them that stuttered so much, she seems to have the ability to take away all my confidence in just a gaze. I glanced at her again to find her wearing the white gloves. Her hair was now pulled back into a simple thin tail, her cloth cap neatly in place and her uniform dusted down. She walked up to me and passed me another lopsided smile,
'The train would be coming into the next station in about ten minutes.'
I looked up at her and I could smell the frosty scent she gave off. It was unusually refreshing, it tickled my nose and it made my dizzy all over. She gave me a small bow,
'You should take the chance to step out of the train for a little while; a breath of cool air should get you back into spirit.'
I gave her a confused expression, and it followed by a deeper shade of pink; she was getting closer for some unknown reason.
'I do that sometimes when the train comes to rest, staying on the train can be quite confining and tiring, it is a pity that we are not allowed to open the window during winter.'
I didn't know that she was so bold to raise her gloved finger to trace my cheeks, she gave me a cheeky grin and it made my blush more. I felt so light on my feet when she patted my head and back away to grace me with another low bow. She brought herself up and I felt that I was being treated like a princess, everything action she had just did was exactly what I seen in the palace up in Eden when my father visit the Royalty of Kosarieé. She was indeed charming.
'I have to get going Miss Viola.'
She nodded her head in acknowledgement and stepped pass me followed down the corridor. However I didn't want to see the last of her, and on my natural instincts, my hand reached out. I didn't know whether I was made to catch her sleeve or not, but I did, and I was excited as ever. I knew my face was painted red with shyness, but I continued, I so much wanted to see her again,
'Wait, You are?'
Surprise was scrawled all over her face that she turned back to face me,
I was lost in her emerald eyes, and the next thing I know I had her slip out of my grasp; my hand slipped.
'You can just call me Kruger.'
With that she left off in haste, and all I had left in that quiet carriage was her frosty scent and the image of her charming grin.
I heard the loud shrill whistle that came from the steam funnel up ahead in the engine room, and I looked out to see the long column of thick grey smoke pass above me. It was a continuous long stream of smoke and it didn't look like was ever going to end. I managed to see a few houses partly covered by the thick snow of the winter. The tinge orange that once covered the sky earlier had now been diminished by the cool darkness of the coming night. I could see a few stars in the darkening sky, but the moon was no where in sight.
I closed the book which I had reading and placed it back into my suitcase. I fell back lazily onto my cabin bed; night always came faster in the winter. When she said that the train was coming to rest the next ten minutes, the sky was still bright then. Only about five minutes have passed, and it was already dark. It was ironic in a way. I turned over to my side and looked out of the window of my cabin; I would be travelling for a week on this express train. It took so long just to reach Avant-garde.
I lay in my bed for a few minutes and the next thing I knew was that I felt the train suddenly slow down. My ears picked up another shrill whistle and it was soon followed by a series of loud low horns. I slowly tore myself of my bed and got up. I got over to the window and looked out to find that the train had arrived in the station she had told me. Small lanterns were lit along the platform; it made the atmosphere feel so warm. As the train pulled into the station and come slowly to a halt, I could see other passengers waiting to board. A loud puff of smoke was released and everything went still.
I grab my coat and rushed out of my cabin to make my way to the fifth carriage, I knew that was where most of the passengers got on and off so I went there. There where many different exits and entrances, but my mind chose to make me walk there. The passengers had just finished their dinner in the third and I bumped into Tobi and Kino. I felt that I met up with a problem.
'Shizuru! I didn't see you at dinner. Where did you go?'
I stopped at my tracks and looked at him, and then I looked at Kino and gave them a smile. I came up with an excuse with hope that I could leave politely to reach my awaited destination. Yet a small hand grabbed onto me and asked me with sparkling blue eyes,
'Big sister, where are you going?'
Tobi looked at me in wonder and I realised that I couldn't run away from that.
'I'm going to take stroll outside on the platform. Would you like to join me?'
I actually directed the last part to Kino only; however it seemed that Tobi picked it up himself. I shouldn't have said the last part. Kino jumped in joy as he looked back to his brother to ask for permission to tag along, and I was correct when Tobi added himself along. His voice was something that carried unmistakable excitement,
'Might as well take a stroll too.'
I told them that I'll go ahead first while they went back to get their coats and jackets. I hurried down the corridors and carriages, passed the bar and unexpectedly bumped into an attendant. His golden eyes questioned me when he held me to prevent me from falling,
'Lady, there's no need to rush. The train stays here for another hour before departure. Please, take your time to get your things.'
I didn't quite register what he said, but I received the message that he thought I was getting off at this station. I graced him with a smile and thanked him for telling me to relax. He bowed as I left for the fifth carriage. Now I knew there was no need to rush, I had an hour to spend outside, yet I realised that the time I had to find for her was limited. I was feeling so desperate.
I reached the fifth carriage faster than I thought I would. When I neared the exit and entrance doors, I saw the different kind of passengers from border board. Their skin was fairer than those that resided in central and I thought I was fair.
I waited patiently by the side until the stream of people stopped, then I gently dropped myself onto the platform. By the time I landed onto the rocky platform, I thought I would slip and fall from the snow that had melted and froze again. To my surprise I was caught tenderly by the arm and smoothly guided by to my balance, I was looking at my feet the whole to notice that she was the one that helped me again.
'Once again, be careful Miss Viola.'
She held me until I went into a sheet of red and she laughed softly,
'You should dress warmly Miss Viola, you are already turning red.'
I reluctantly took my hand away from her grasp and I felt the longing for her hold already. I took in a deep breath of the chilly atmosphere and felt it. I felt the overwhelming sensation of relaxation grip me, I never felt so alive. I knew she was watching me from where she was standing by the door; I could feel her gaze on me. I twirled around to relish the feeling, and I knew I was teasing her. I heard her hitch a breath and I saw her turn away to distract herself. I danced around the cobbled platform, staying within her gaze. She watched me skip from stone to stone, while I watched her stamp the tickets of the boarding passengers.
We watched each other as our eyes met from time to time. I felt so happy when I saw the tinge of pink spread across of her cheeks; it seems that I had an effect on her as she had on me. I walked up to her when I realised that I had drifted too far, I too could feel the coldness get to my bone. I was sure I was shivering by then. When I arrived by her side, she watched me as I wrapped my arms around my body. This time I was really red. I heard a shuffle of fabric beside me and the next was that I had a uniform jacket draped over my shoulders.
'I'm sure that Miss Viola does not want to catch a cold.'
She grinned at me while she flipped the stamp with her hand. She was now dressed in a dark long sleeve shirt that was buttoned all the way to her neck, she didn't look cold, but I could tell she was. It was so sweet of her to lend me her jacket. I looked up to her and asked her with worry,
'Won't you now be the one that will catch a cold?'
She looked at me and laughed, I realised she had this distinct laughter that I knew I wouldn't forget. She smoothed the hair on my head and hit her chest,
'I was born against this weather! My body can withstand anything that winter has to give.'
She thumped her chest in triumph and showed me a lopsided grin. I felt even happier when I pulled the jacket tighter over my body, I could smell the frosty scent, and it was as if she was made of snow. Then I heard a voice…I had totally forgotten about Kino and Tobi.
She looked as if she had a boulder crushed onto her. Her eyes had somehow lost their colour; the gleam in her emerald had lost its beautiful shine. I held the jacket around me tighter; I didn't want to leave her. Tobi held Kino with his left and Kino held onto me with his, I wanted to hold her with mine. She looked at my interlinked hand and back up to Tobi. Colour drained from her in an instant, and I knew what exactly she had been thinking.
This was extremely terrible.
Tobi's voice dragged me away from looking at her; I almost frowned at him,
'Shizuru, we should be getting back onto the train. It's getting late.'
I looked down at Kino who gave out a huge yawn, and I looked back at Tobi. I faltered so much!
'Yes, I think we should get going.'
I felt her gaze land on me, and I shivered again. In that instant I saw her emotions for me raw out in the cold. She wanted me here.
'Why don't you go back in with Kino first?'
I glanced over to Tobi who gave me a puzzled look, but he quickly shrugged his shoulders and led a sleepy Kino up onto the carriage. He gave me one last look and walked away down into the carriage. Now she had me to herself. At least this was what I felt was fair, she was thinking too much just by seeing. Things cracked even more when she spoke in a dead monotonous tone,
'I'm sorry I didn't know…that you…'
I wanted to scream no! This was a misunderstanding! I had nothing to do with him! I wanted to protest but she cut me off swiftly,
'You should be boarding the train; we'll be departing from the station soon.'
I had so much wanted to cry out to her and proclaim that nothing that she thought was happening. I just wanted to cry! My lungs gave out when I realised I couldn't, no tears wanted to escape from my eyes. This could not be happening. I unwillingly pulled myself away from her and climbed up onto the carriage, this time I didn't feel her hand come up to support me. I needed to do something.
'Can I keep your jacket?'
She stared at me in utter confusion and looked away guiltily. She slowly nodded her head after some time and turned away from me. That was not what I wanted… I wanted an answer. I jumped back down onto the platform and pulled her body to face mine. Then I kissed her.
I kissed her cold lips, and traced her face with my shivering fingers.
I wanted an answer.
I knew I cried myself to sleep when I came back to my cabin. The tighter I held her jacket, the more I wailed. I cried into her jacket to muffle my erratic breathing and my strangled sobs, I had brought myself back when I was only a little girl crying over the snake my father use to keep as a pet. I fell into darkness when I realised my eyes stung and I had no more air to breathe. I felt so hurt.
I awoke to a sudden shudder of the carriage and same loud shrill whistle. I dragged my eyes open to find the morning rays stream into my cabin windows. I shut them back when I felt the sting. I remembered how hard I have cried, and I felt so pathetic. The thick fabric that I had covering my body provided me with the warmth, despite the fact I had forgotten to take off my coat and change into my sleep wear when I returned heartbroken. I took in a deep breath and I forced a smile out…the smell of her frosty scent still lingered. I still had hope… that was what I kept telling myself. I still had hope.
I had a fast breakfast in the third carriage. I grabbed a croissant from the table and headed off back to my cabin, I had no intention to let my body get picked out by Tobi or Kino again. I knew I was being selfish, but I had to get what I wanted first. I didn't know I went the wrong direction to the cabins that ended up at the back of the train, lost. How could I forget that I was to exit from the back to reach the cabin carriage! I scolded my mentally and turned to walk back until I heard a booming voice that shook my body all over. It sure shocked my soul out for a second.
'How are you to do your cleaning duty outside without your jacket? Wanting to catch a cold?'
I looked back to find the voice, but only to find a flight of stairs to the second level of the carriage. I had wanted to see the commotion, but I steeled myself not to when I heard the smooth voice that failed to answer me last night.
'No sir. I…I…lost my jacket.'
'You lost your jacket? How can that be possible?'
I could see their shadows dance on the stairs and I hid myself stay clear from the scolding. I knew that this was to happen…I was being extremely selfish for this to happen. She was lying for my selfish request.
'I can still do my duty sir. I'm sure.'
'I'm sure that you'll catch a cold.'
There was silence for a while and then the gruff voice calmly stated,
'Go and borrow a jacket from someone. I'm sure one of them won't be using it now.'
I heard a chirp of happiness emit from her and she said a quick thank you. I wanted to pull away from the staircase at that moment to avoid her, but I was too late as she skipped down the flight so fast that she stopped an inch away from me. I turned pink again at her face and stood there like tree again, this time I was unable to move. Her face change from happiness to nothing, a blank sheet of expression stretched over her face and I cringed. She jumped to the side and gave me a quick bow, yet I was somehow able to gather my courage fast enough and stop her from speeding off. She didn't turn to face me so I talked to her board back, the sense of security she gave off was still there, and I loved it so much.
'I can return you your jacket.'
I thought I saw her flinch when I said that, her low voice then cut through my thoughts,
It sounded so commanding that I withdrew a step back from her figure. She was now so intimidating that my hands started to shiver. This was going the wrong direction again. Her dark long sleeve shirt looked wet and her hair carried bits of snow… she must have already done some cleaning outside on the balcony when she got caught without a jacket. I shivered again.
'Keep the jacket. You asked for it.'
She ran off before I could explain myself and I cursed silently under my breath. Everything was going in the wrong direction now.
Maidens of Central were to be graceful. I wasn't being graceful at all. In my cabin I stripped down my dress and pulled out a dark shirt from my suitcase. I slipped on a pair of dark leggings and threw her jacket around my body. It fitted my body snugly even though it was loose around the edges and a tad bit long at the sleeves. It felt as if she was embracing me, I turned red in front of my mirror. Oh my. I ran my hand through my hair and pull it into a pony tail. Then I went into my mission.
I didn't know why I was doing this…dressing up to look like one of the staff, but my mind said I had to.
To not arouse any more suspicion, I had to get one of those cloth caps that the staff wore around the train, so I used my ways and this time I did so gracefully. It wasn't quite difficult actually, all I did was to throw in a saunter and a pout at the end; one of the male staff willingly offered his cap to me. It wasn't difficult at all. Once I had the cloth cap finally on my head, I headed for the last carriage. I knew she was to be there on her cleaning duty.
When I reached the last carriage, I saw the back of her outside on the balcony enduring the cold winter. I quietly slid the door open trying the best not to get her attention, but she apparently caught me entering outside. The cold wind that wrapped around my frame when I entered outside sent an electrifying tremble throughout my body, it was so cold! Even this jacket couldn't keep me warm enough, how was she able to brave all of this? She had yet to turn, but she growled out to who she thought had come out,
'Mai, if you're here to tease me, I'll really throw you off the train!'
I was astonished of she could do, I chuckled too loudly that she turned to face me and it caught her too. She was as astonished as me, it was really written all over her face. This time I tried my chances,
'You'll really throw me off the train?'
She quickly retorted with a low growl,
'You're not Mai!'
She hesitated for a while before she looked at me deep in the eye,
'Why are dressed like that!?'
I looked down at the 'gracefulness' I adorned and I laughed,
'Don't you like it?'
I twirled on the spot to show all to her, and I caught her turning away. She grabbed the brush in her hand and turned back to continue on her work, she grumbled to me,
'You shouldn't be here. You'll catch a cold even with a jacket.'
I realised that I was indeed now shivering terribly. I glanced up and wonder again how she was able to withstand the harshness of the bad side of winter. If I was to toss a coin, I was sure she was up to challenge both sides. She noticed I was still there standing watching her scrub the rail, and she turned her head the side to eye me with her emerald gaze,
'Isn't your son worrying about where his mother is?'
I went, 'What!?'
I laughed at her when she turned deep red when I teased her again. I held her onto her left hand when she continued to scrub the rail with the other. I realised she could steady me and herself on the moving train while she was working. I only tightened my grip when I realised it. She could do so many things at once, she was really multitasking. She glanced at my direction and she looked away quickly, then she unexpectedly apologized to me. I looked up to her in confusion, and she rubbed her nose with her arm,
'I'm sorry for misunderstanding your…feelings.'
I knew she wasn't good with expressing her emotions right out to me and I accepted it. Both of us fell in love in like…two days? That's quite a record. I leaned onto her and I felt her tense up for a second and relax after that, she'll get use to it.
I brought her back into the carriage when she had finished her cleaning duty. I took off her jacket from around my body and I held it in front her,
'Thank you for this, but I think you really need it.'
She blinked at me twice and this time she kissed me on the forehead and whispered,
'I think you need it more than me.'
Then next thing I knew I blushed into a shade of deep red, I knew what exactly she had meant.
I didn't know how she found my cabin, but she certainly did. She said she had come to get back her jacket, I was confused at first but I gave up thinking. I left her by the door to reach for the jacket on the bed, and when I turned round to head back to the door, I heard the soft click of the closing door and the twist of the lock. I felt my heart skip a beat. God, my chest wanted to burst.
I grasp tightly onto her jacket and I stepped back. Her eyes were glazed over with something I couldn't really pin point. Was it lust? Desire? Want? Need? Or was it simply her love towards me. I was caught in a net; I didn't know what I was supposed to do, I didn't know why I was moving away from her. She took slow steps towards me and then she stopped. I felt my back touch against the cold window and I shivered. God, I knew she could make me shiver even more. I tore my eyes away from her and looked down to the jacket in my grasp, I realised I have been holding my breath.
I heard the squeak of the bed spring and I looked back up to find her sitting down on the bed. Her eyes were still on me…or not. It seemed that she was looking outside, it was snowing tonight. I was looking at the snow before she knocked, and I was thinking about her. I didn't know it would end up like this. My body turned hot when I noticed she was studying my form, and then I couldn't control a shiver that was running up my spine. She caught my eyes and she spoke,
'Are you cold?'
I gave a nod. I did feel cold from leaning against the window. Even though the insulator was turned up, I still felt cold just standing in the room. I grasped tighter onto her jacket and I took in her frosty scent. I went dizzy after that. Her smooth voice brought my attention back to her on the bed. She gave me a warm smile and held out a hand towards me,
'Come here. I won't bite.'
I hesitated. I gripped onto her jacket and I pulled myself away the window to start towards her. Her emerald eyes danced with mine and it lured me into some unknown fantasy. It was like playing a game, and I was getting addicted. I absently reached out for her hand and she took me in a firm grip. I winced at the contact, but relaxed when I realised she was motioning me to continue my journey. By the time I reached her, I didn't know I had sat myself onto her lap.
She placed my hand over her shoulder while she reached out to wrap her arms around my waist. She leaned into me and breathed out hard. Her breath tickled my chest and I tightened the grip onto her jacket. I felt really tense in this situation. I looked down to her and I saw her resting her cheek on my breast, she looked oddly comfortable there. I blushed at the thought. I didn't know whether she had felt it, but she looked at me suddenly and grinned,
'You won't get cold with me around.'
I felt my cheeks burn, and I couldn't suppress a smile to form on my face. I took a step forward, I was not going back. I eased myself into her embrace and brought my other hand with her jacket to rest on her shoulder, with that I leaned for so my head rested comfortably on her head. She let out a small noise from the back of her throat and she tightened her embrace.
We stayed there under the low noise of the moving train and the sudden jerks of the carriage for about a few minutes until she did something so bold. She kissed my collar. I jumped in surprise when she did that, luckily she held me around my waist or I would have fallen onto the ground. I looked down at her and saw a mischievous grin spread across her face. With that she pulled up, placed a chaste kiss on my lips and attacked my neck. I gripped hard onto her shoulders to suppress a moan that was caught in my throat. However in the end it came out as a strangled sigh when she licked a sensitive spot. I couldn't help myself but pull her bit closer and nuzzle further into her warm embrace.
I played with her smooth hair to distract myself as she undid the buttons of my blouse. When I felt her hands undo the last button, I felt so bare even though I had my camisole on. I looked down at her when I realised all her actions stopped. I found her staring. I didn't know whether I was my breast, my body…or my camisole. She turned into a deeper shade of pink and coughed when I tugged her hair in annoyance. She gave me a sheepish look and pulled my blouse down behind my back, she stopped went it half way and I wondered why she didn't just pull it all the way down. She gave out a growl and I shivered as she traced from my neck all the way down to my breast. I gripped harder onto her shoulders. God, she could tease more than I knew.
I unconsciously pushed my chest towards her as she held my breast with her palm, and then she squeezed. I yelped loudly when she did that, and tweak of pain shot up my chest and rendered me to tears. She immediately pulled back and looked up to me; she had guilt written all over; sometimes she looked too sorry to be.
'I'm sorry…I don't even know my strength.'
She pulled her hand away from my chest and eased it around my waist. Then and there, there was so much difference. I felt something rise within me, a sensational emotion washed over me and I suddenly grabbed her hand and kissed her knuckles. I saw her eyes widen in surprise and she held me even tighter. I lowered her hand slowly to my chest and placed it over my breast. She looked at me in fear and I traced her ear. She reacted to my touch and growled lowly…it seemed that I found a spot too.
'I trust you.'
I sounded extremely cheesy, like those girls who found their one and only love and I thought I had found mine. Then it hit me in the face, I was only going to have one week in this train. After that, there was no more her…only him. How can this love of mine last? My friends use to tell me that I should find a suitable man that can outlive me till the end, then death do us part. I tensed up immediately and she noticed. Her hand on my breast pulled away slightly, her fingers traced the pattern on my camisole, and she looked at me in the eye,
I saw the love for me in her eyes and I was overwhelmed with torrents of heartbreaking emotions. I flushed myself onto her and held her head tightly; she gasped. Placing a kiss in on hair, I breathed in; I didn't care if it was a one night stand. I didn't care if it was a fling. I didn't want to care. All I wanted was to be with her for this one long week. This was all I wanted because I never felt so alive in my life. I really felt in love and I felt love. I was embraced with something that my mind secretly whispered to me that this was something I couldn't replace. I trembled in her arms, I wanted to time to stop for me.
Only for me to savour.
Her hand that held my waist travelled up my back and she started to stroke my back in a calming motion. I slowly relaxed at her action and I softened my grip around her head. I could feel her hot breath against my chest and I felt somewhat ticklish.
I just wanted her.
I took back my hands from her shoulders and shrugged my blouse down onto her lap. She watched me with curious eyes and a dark pink shade spread across her face as I took off my camisole. My chest instantly felt cold as I took off my undergarment, a cold air that washed my cabin wrapped around my upper body. I looked at her with plea and then her face changed from innocent bystander to a hungry looking wolf. Suddenly her voice shook me as she commanded,
Before I could respond, her hands immediately lifted my torso that I was forced to stand. I squeaked in alarm and I lost my hold onto her jacket and my blouse dropped to the ground. She looked me devilishly and I swore she was the demon that seduced the angel. Her firm hands smoothed down the sides of my body and finally rested on my hips. I saw the dead flame light up once again when she traced the band of my skirt. Then I jumped in surprise when her deft fingers pulled my skirt down in one swift motion. I shuddered. I had totally forgotten about the other side of her coin.
When she peeled off my stockings, I couldn't help but tremble under her touch. Her hands ran up my legs and from the look on her satisfied face, she was enjoying the moment. I couldn't but let off a chuckle, she looked too adorable. Her ears picked up my voice and titled her head up to meet my eyes, her low voice stammered,
'What's…so…What's so funny?'
I smoothed out her hair and touched her cheek lightly. She leaned into my touch, thumbing her lips; I leaned forward and said seductively,
'You look hungry.'
Then I heard her gulp.
She was on top of me. Her strong muscles kept her up and around from crushing my body and I felt so secure to have her over me.
She cradled my head with her hand and the fingers of her other were firmly within me. I was breathing hard on her and she was panting like a wild dog. All I could then see was a blurred version of her face, I had tears welled up in my eyes. My face was laced with her kisses, my neck with her bites and my body mixed with her sweat. The temperature in my room felt no hotter than summer in Central. Her rhythm had stopped and I thought that she was waiting for me to get use to her presence inside my body. She blew a long breath into my ear and cooed my name.
My arms around her trembled slightly and I gripped her hard so I had her body pressed down on mine. The fabric of her pants rubbed against my bare thighs and I moaned out into her hair. I picked my hips up and urged her to continued, yet all I received was completely stillness. I waited for a while and I pulled backing worry to find out what was happening. Her eyes were brimmed with tears, just like mine. Her lips were pursed together and her face contorted in guilt. I pressed my forehead against hers and kiss her lips softly. I didn't know what was wrong. Everything was perfect…but…
Her smooth voice sounded like a broken record, and it scared me,
I felt the fingers inside me get dragged out slowly and I gasped. I hugged her fiercely; I didn't want this to end just here…just like this. She croaked and I could hear her pain,
'I'm not the one…'
I tightened my embrace around her and kept her close, I could still feel her warmth inside me…At least we still had this short line of connection. I nuzzled into her bare shoulder and kissed her there, repeatedly. Yet her voice was something that made all my movements stop.
'I'm not the one that is supposed to be sharing this moment with you.'
I choked back my tears as I felt her fingers come out of me. It was slow and agonising, it was down right painful.
'You deserve someone…better.'
Did she know?
I held her even tighter when I felt her move back, I didn't want to see her face now, and I didn't want her to see mine. I just…
I just cried.
I felt the hand on my head stroke my hair and I cried more. Her ragged breathing became so calm that it shocked me; mine was still fast and erratic. She didn't do anything else, she didn't kiss me, she didn't tighten her hold around me…she didn't do anything. I had wanted to scream but I had fallen so deep that I couldn't pick myself up. I eventually slumped back down onto the bed when I realised my arms were so tired from clinging onto her. My head fell to the side and I daren't look at her in the eye, I was sure she felt the same. She hovered over me, and I could no longer feel her gaze that took in every inch of my body. I felt wasted.
The warmth she created left as quickly as she had. She got over to the side of me and sat at the edge of the bed. I heard her reach down for her shirt; she still had her pants on. I curled myself into a ball and reached out onto her jacket, this time I made sure that it will stay with me. Her frosty scent was stronger than ever in my cabin bed but I knew it would linger for long. I breathed in as much I could, if she couldn't intoxicate me psychically, I would rather have her scent stay within my mind forever.
I shivered one way or another and I became bold enough to turn my head to find her hand lightly skimming over my arm. Her face held so much sorrow that I realised it paled in contrast to mine. She suffered so much more. She looked into my eyes and said earnestly, her smooth voice had somehow gained it way back to her,
'I'm sorry, Miss Viola.'
I let a tear fall and I turned in the bed in order to grab onto her. A look of shock washed her face when I pleaded with her,
'If you won't take me, at least stay…'
I tightened my grip,
'At least stay with me.'
Passion which I once saw crossed her face and a soft smile ghosted her face. She took my hand into her hand and carefully she leaned towards me. Soon I had myself tucked in her strong and protective embrace. Then she rubbed her face against my head and looked into my eyes and the next thing was that…
This time I didn't awake to the shudder of the carriage but to her fingers that caressed my face ever so slowly. I pulled my eye lids back slowly to have her emerald eyes dearly looking at me. At that moment, all I thought was that what ever happened last night was just a nightmare… but a voice at the back of my head screamed in denial. I shushed it and focussed onto her. I didn't want anything to break my truth. My bare body was wrapped in her jacket and in her strong embrace, I felt good. Her dark hair ran down her face and ended tangled in a pool of colours with my light brown hair.
Her fingers drew a path down my face and slowly made it way to my lips. I kissed her fingers and then she brought it lower down and it stopped to suddenly take in my hand. Then she brought it over to her body. When I looked down, I realised it was above her thumping heart. She brought her cold lips to my forehead and I trembled, she breathed out slowly,
'You will stay, in mine.'
At that moment I was blessed with joy. Did I hear wrongly? I was not sure. Now it made everything that happen last night really like a dream…more like of a pleasant nightmare. I reached out for her but she caught my hands faster than I ever imagined and pushed it back to me. Then my heart skipped a beat for the second time, she eased my hands to my heart and above came her hands. I never heard her speak so solemnly,
'However I cannot stay…in your heart.'
I was confused for a second, but it struck me like a bolt of lighting after it passed. What she said was terribly wrong. I tried to resist her hold above my hands, but she kept them locked above my chest. She looked me in the eye and smiled. I wanted to wipe that smile of her face, I didn't want this. This wasn't what my love was supposed to be. The dream I brought upon myself earlier was smashed to bits. This was reality. I looked at her smile and I realised a crack in that face of hers. She wore a mask that had so perfectly concealed her love for me. She was holding back her real emotions more than I could. Inside she was crumbling… Her gaze was lowered onto my chest and she whispered,
'You must forget about me.'
Her hands above mine finally became slack and I felt my dried well of tears come back to life. She brought her arms around me and she cooed my name… I curled further into her embrace, I thought everything was to come into a happy ending, apparently it did not.
It was the start of another nightmare.
She reluctantly left my cabin; she left without her jacket.
Before she left, I thought that was her main purpose for coming to my cabin…but I soon I found out that it was for her to confirm my feelings. I think she had received my answer clearly and told me her answer. I wasn't ready for such an answer. I actually thought over what she said when she was putting on her shirt. It was oddly ironic and romantic in a way, but it was downright heartbreaking for me to hear. She wanted me to forget about her, she didn't want me to love her; but I adore her. I screamed silently in my head when she dusted her shirt down. She looked exactly as she had when she came into my cabin.
I sat upright, placing my weight on one arm; I leaned back slightly to get a better view of her. What she said, I was never going to listen.
I will not forget her.
After the door closed on me, the atmosphere was still. I sat on the bed, silently watching the door of the cabin. I was hoping that she would come back, but she didn't. Her frosty scent no more lingered in the air of the cabin. I felt so dead. My body slowly dropped back down to my bed and I clutched tightly onto her jacket. I was bare to the bottom, I didn't care…
I didn't want to forget her.
I was given a cup of tea when I sat at a table in the fourth carriage, the bar was opposite me. The waiter smiled at me when I looked up from my book, I held him back with question,
'Excuse me, I didn't order tea.'
He gave me an even boarder smile and I could just see his white teeth,
'It's on the bartender, Ma'am.'
The waiter turned his body to the side to gesture across to the bartender that stood behind the counter. I followed the waiter's directions and found my eyes and a tall man dressed elegantly, his head was cropped with dark sleek hair and his eyes sparkled like the light reflected on a lake. He was indeed charming, he reminded me so much of the both of them. My eyes met his eyes as he turned to wipe the counter; I gave him a quick fake smile of mine and he smiled a pleasant one back to me. I thanked the waiter and looked at the tea, and I thought he already had information about me…I thought wrong.
I took a sip of the tea and mentally frowned…God, it actually tasted awful. It was either his hands could not brew or it was just the tea. I decided on both of them, I couldn't be mean after all. I continued reading from where I left off, but the small chatter at the bar was terribly distracting. My eyes caught her dark blue hair in a second and I met her emerald gaze. Hers was as lifeless as mine, God; she looked like she hadn't slept for days. She politely pushed her way to the counter and struck up a fast conversation with the bartender. Her eyes moved from mine to his quickly, then after some words, the bartender had happiness plastered onto his face.
I felt sick in the gut.
She turned back from the counter and our eyes met again. She had gotten herself a new jacket, it looked older than the one I had with me. She adjusted her cloth cap on her head and gave a small bow to me. I was happy that she greeted me, but her words that she said to me that night rung like a death toll. I shook my head to clear my mind and when I looked back to find her, she was gone.
I scanned the carriage for her, but it seemed that she had disappeared as fast as she came. My glance was caught by the bartender's and I smiled meekly at him, I had a very bad feeling about this. I turned back to my book and found that I had to start from the beginning of the chapter again, I had forgotten everything.
The tea had gone cold, and the bartender arrived at my table. I looked up from the page and mentally reminded where I had stopped. His dark eyes twinkled and brought out a hand, his voice as I realised was a charming as the both,
'It's a pleasure to meet you.'
I shook his hand and found that his grip was deathly. I winced under his handshake and my hand thronged with slight pain after that. Instinctively, I took my hand back and answered him with the same usual grace I gave every stranger,
'I am too, and you are?'
His face changed quickly into shock, it was as if he had done something gravely wrong. He quickly stuttered,
'Karl. Karl E. Yeager.'
I looked closely at him…he was not one bit like him.
I had three days left to spend on the train. Four days had gone and passed.
I dragged my tired eyes away from the window. It was snowing heavily outside, I have never seen so much snow I my life. I pick up the top of the grey mountains in the distance, knowing that my destination would be arriving…not now but soon. Very soon, I thought. I got up from my seat and exited the carriage; I walked down the long narrow corridors. I was wandering aimlessly…like a lost soul. It was definitely not like me…but I couldn't help but feel that way.
My ears picked up a small conversation when I stopped to find out where I was. I heard a woman's voice first; it was sweet and had the wisp of tenderness. I saw from the reflection on the window that it belonged to a girl that looked as old as I. She was apparently one of the staff; she had a jacket that looked exactly like… Her hair was as orange as a burning flame could be, her lips were pursed for a while and a frown came soon later. I realised that she was talking to someone that hid from my line of vision.
'Stop sulking already. You weren't like that two days ago!'
I took a soft step closer to where the two were, just behind the corner I could hear the girl's voice clearly,
'Gosh! You're going to crumble even more if you keep going like this!'
I could quickly grasp the situation; it was as if she was talking to me…
'This time, I'm positive that you let yourself get caught in the net!'
I took in a deep breath, I had to control myself from agreeing that I too had fell into that net of love. I had steer myself clear from these type of conversations or there wouldn't be an end to my tears. There was silence for a while, then I saw a little shock in the girl's face and next she had raised a daring finger to the person opposite her,
'Don't give me that look! You know it yourself that you weren't suppose to get to close to any of the passengers!'
I thought I heard a small stammer, however the red head interjected before the soft voice could continue,
'No 'but'! You clearly knew what would happen in the end, yet you went for it! You're a fool! Now you're like a lifeless doll!'
I pulled myself back, I realised that I was edging closer to peek round the corner. I felt tense at the moment…it really sounded like the girl was talking to me. I strained to hear what was coming, yet all I heard was for the girl to continue,
'Snap out of it! I already told you: No 'but'! I…'
Then I was thrown back against the corridor wall when I heard the loud voice boom in the narrow corridor,
'But I had to fall for her!'
I thought I would never have a chance to hear her voice, but I did. I blinked a couple of times and popped my ears, did I just hear wrongly. She sounded so sincere,
'I just had to. I just had to.'
She gave no more reason than that. It was as if she was made only to fall in love with me and no one else, I felt relieved for a second, unfortunately her previous words had sunk in so deeply that it rang like a siren. Whenever I thought about how I loved her…her words always shook me, whole. I shivered while I stood there against the wall, this felt peculiarly wrong. The girl that she spoke to gave a sigh and smacked her on the head, I winced a little when I saw it in the reflection, and it looked like it really hurt. Then the red head continued from where she left off,
'You're really are a fool.'
I felt my heart throb and…and…
I thought I was the fool.
I waved to Tobi and Kino as they gave their final glance towards me. I leaned against the frame of the door as the brothers walked further and further away from the train. Night was falling and the sky had already turned dark orange when the train arrived in the station. I issued a small breath of satisfaction…that I had a perfect reason to do so. I hung my head in shame when I thought of my reason, and my eyes stared in hopelessness at my boots. Soon familiar looking boots came next to mine and in the cold winter atmosphere my nose was able to pick up her ever-so frosty scent.
My eyes quickly looked up and it was momentarily kissed by those emerald eyes. She turned away faster I saw before. Her hair still gave off it lustrous shine, and her back looked as strong and protective as ever. Then it came into mind, I hadn't seen her for a day and I have already started to miss her. I chewed on my lower lip as I watched her on the platform twirling the stamp in her hands.
I couldn't take it anymore.
I couldn't stand the fact I had to forget her. I couldn't even bring myself to not look at her, to erase her face from my mind, her scent from my nose and her touch from my skin. As I agreed with her: I just had to fall for her. I had to. I brought crossed my arms and watched the candles in the lamps be lit by the station attendant, the light that shone on her face made her look even more beautiful. I had to.
This time I really teetered on the edge,
'You're a fool.'
She turned to look at me; her eyebrows were raised in question. Her dark hair was kept out of her face and I had so wanted to reach out to touch her face.
'Excuse me, Miss Viola. Who are you to judge me?'
I stared hard into her eyes and pushed myself further,
'I am who you fell for…am I not?'
She bit her lip hard and she spat harshly at me,
'Yes! I am the one that fell for you! However aren't you a fool too?!'
I was ready for that, I was calm and composed and she was shocked when she saw no reaction, I leaned out of the open door way and exhaled into her face,
'Yes, I am a fool! I'm a fool to fall in love with a train staff. I'm a fool that I fell in love with you when I saw you for the third time. I'm a fool that I kissed you, a fool to chase after you, a fool let you take my heart from me…'
I realised that was starting to tear…again. She looked at me as if in a daze, I leaned out further to her…and I thought that I would fall,
'A fool that will never forget about you!'
I lost my balance and stumbled forward. She caught me in her arms and I saw the first crystal of snow.
Then this time she kissed me.
This time she brought me to near ecstasy. I screamed into her hair as the rhythm of her fingers got faster. She held onto me gently while I gripped onto her like a vice. I could feel my nails dig into her skin and I knew I would regret later. However at this moment, I didn't regret a thing. My hips bucked in response as she eased her fingers in and out of me. She was tired and I was tired, but neither of us wanted to call it quits, she had yet to take us to the pinnacle. My body rubbed lovingly against hers and she brought me closer at my action. She was as bare as me.
Her hair had gone into my face and it tickled me. Yet I was position to laugh, I felt pain with pleasure that this cocktail of feelings felt uncomfortably soothing. She whispered words of comforts into my ears as her pace was suddenly brought into a slow relaxing pace. She stroked me and I purred in affection, I didn't know why she didn't bring us to our wanted climax, yet this time I didn't question. I just patiently waited; I didn't want things to be repeated. Her voice was hoarse from the panting; it could still bring me to a puddle,
I raised my head from the crook of her neck, she said it again,
I felt her fingers inside me curl and I shuddered violently, I breathed out in pleasure. She nuzzled further to me and kissed my neck,
She kissed me hard after she said that and her fingers inside me thrust inside with force that I yelped into her mouth. She took in my small scream and pulled apart from my mouth and licked my lips,
Immediately she started her fast rhythm again and I moved along with her. She had said her name to me and I tried it out on my tongue. I said it twice and she growled in annoying satisfaction. Her name rolled off my tongue smoothly…I could repeat her name over and over again, I would never tire. Soon, I felt my legs trembled and the swirl of emotion shock my body. I was feeling so light and dizzy that I had to hold onto her without much more force. I knew that I was soon to reach seventh heaven. I heard her coo my name and I shuddered, I was sure we both said each other's name with much saturation that both of us couldn't help but agree.
With her last unexpected gentle thrust, I was brought to high heaven.
I screamed her name loud and clear into her hair as I thrashed under her. Then I solely felt her pleasurably…slowly bring me down from where I felt the utmost sensation. I fell like a dead log under her and soon she gingerly brought her fingers out. I wanted them back in, but I was so tired to ever ask her. I gathered all my strength to raise my upper body up to meet hers and I gave her a chaste kiss. I wanted to thank her but I really had no breath. My mind ran in a thousand directions when she stroked my thighs, her sweaty hands traced up my body and finally they rested beside my face. Her body was soon lowered onto mine and I gripped her tight. I met her eyes and she returned my embrace.
I slipped a hand to reach for her and placed it over my chest. I could feel my own thrumming heart and I felt so much joy,
'You will stay in my heart forever…'
Her hands tightened and I continued with hope,
'As I will never forget you…'
Love shone in her eyes and she kissed me passionately, I breathed out with my newfound sensation,
This was my last day.
The train was arriving in Avant-grade in the night. It had just turned midnight and she held me in her arms. Once she had heard that I was going to leave in a day's time, she had made her way to my cabin after that very night. I didn't know how she found out, but she did so silently. She murmured something in her sleep and held me little tighter, I was still yet to sleep in her embrace. I traced her toned body and her face, thumbed her lips and smoothed her dark hair; I was going to lose this. The jacket she had given to me was thrown across the both of us, the thick cotton blanket made it even warmer. I curled up against her warm body and kissed her neck. She moved again and loosely moved her hand to my head.
I was going to lose all of this.
The loud shrill whistle that came from the engine room died off when the train pulled into the station. I had her jacket in my arms and my suitcase at my feet. She stood beside me with the stamp in her hand. Her hair was pulled back into the same thin pony tail and her hands covered in thick gloves. All most everyone had gotten their things together and like me, was waiting at the door of the carriage. It was awfully noisy. When I heard the long siren, I watched her step quickly to the front and slide the door to the side. Then I grabbed my suitcase and hopped of gracefully from the train onto the platform.
I didn't want to turn back.
Everyone started to flood around me, passengers boarding and alighting. I stopped in the swarm of people and I could hear her voice amidst the loud chatter and footsteps on the cobbled ground. I had yet to turn; I had yet to see her for the last time. Suddenly I heard my name get shouted from among the crowd and I grimaced. I saw my fiancé standing with an extra coat in his arms.
I had a fiancé?
I just remembered.
I got onto the train for a reason…and he was my reason?
I had lost my virginity to a train staff. I was to lose it to him…but I didn't. He waved at me and walked towards me, I felt uneasy. When he reached me, I looked down on me and leaned in to peck me on my lips. I felt sick when he did, yet I didn't know why I didn't pull away. I could feel her eyes on me and I shivered. He noticed my tremble and reached to bring the extra coat over my shoulder, however I quickly stopped him.
'I already have an extra jacket.'
He looked at me in surprise and shrugged his shoulders. He then reached over to take my suitcase and said in a hoarse voice than I found that her voice could be compared to none,
'Come on Shizuru, it's going to get colder if we don't hurry.'
I looked grimly at him and he jumped a little. Before he could ask about my current mood, I threw onto her jacket, twirled around and headed back to where she stood. He jumped in further shock at my action and called loudly after me. I didn't care if he came after me; I just wanted to be with her one last time. I reached her faster than what I thought, I realised that most of the passengers had cleared from the platform.
When she saw me, she was surprised as my fiancé. It seemed that she hadn't seen what had done to me just now…I still had hope. I ran up to her with speed and threw myself into her arms…no one could make me feel this warm. She lowered me back down onto the ground and asked me with her ever-so smooth voice,
'Shizuru? Did you forget something?'
I squeaked in happiness as she called me by my name. I held onto her free hand and I looked deeply into her eyes, I wouldn't want to forget those shades. Pulling her in closer to my body, I reached up to her face.
I kissed her fervently on the lips and I felt the equal amount of passion strike back at me. Her grip on my hands tighten, it read: don't leave. I would have gladly complied with her wish, sadly my fiancé arrived and I had to pull back quickly. He touched my shoulder and threw me a worried glance. I looked at him and back at her, she had the same look when Tobi arrived beside me, however her eyes of hope and love for me still burned. I gave her a warm smile and unwillingly pulled back my hands to place it above my heart; I whispered unspoken words to her in silence…
Then I turned and left.
This time I didn't look back…All I saw was the first snow crystal.
I glanced back and looked at the glass bottle in my hand, then at the man that sat opposite me.
I looked out of the window and saw the heavy downfall of snow. He asked me a question of worry, and I gave him back a fake smile he earned very long ago. I ran a hand through my brown hair and smooth down the dark jacket I had brought back; I realised he was as tense as ever. I gave up on him and gazed at my hand…I was so content that I had yet to accept his ring. I turned back again.
'Shizuru? Did you forget something?'
I looked up to meet his green eyes…I had to thank him for that one day. I turned to glance back, and then I came back round to give him another smile,
'Excuse me, but I have to check on something.'
He looked at me in confusion and tried to question me further, but I had already gotten up from my seat and walked down the isle.
I realise it didn't need three encounters like the first to make my heart race. I exited the carriage to move onto the next, he didn't need to see why I was constantly rejecting his final proposal. When I entered, I heard a smooth question,
'Have you forgotten something?'
I felt my heart race and I turned to step into her familiar warm embrace. Pulling onto her jacket as she did with mine, I took into her refreshing scent. Her hands tightened over my body as I placed a warm hand over her heart. She shivered from my touch and I smiled. I shook my head to her question, and pulled myself onto my toes and kissed her.
'No…' I breathed,
'I could never forget you.'
A/N: I really hope you have enjoyed it! I have a few mistakes...or a lot, Oops. I didn't edit it again. This one-shot is complete to the dot! So now... WATCH OUT FOR THE EPILOGUE OF 'Photos of only you'. I have to put Akeome on a hold first, or maybe I'll do a poll? Yea...I'll do that. Let's see which one prevails!
Cheers! - J-crusader