I come in peace! I know I know...I'm horrible. But I really have a lot going on with school,my health, and family. Thankfully I'm getting through it with the help of friends and sisters. Anyways I've working on this chapter for a while and finally I know where this is going. Ok so I know I promised that this story would end up with Ben and Amy but....just like I'm writing Amy, I'm just as confused as she is about Ben and Ricky. So from now on I can't promise pairing. Sorry.
Now on to the chapter.
Where I Once Stood
'This can't be happening!' my mind screamed as I looked at the picture in front of me: Ricky now on one knee with a beautiful engagement ring on one hand and another holding my own. His eyes pleaded to get an answer.
He wasn't the same boy I meant that day at band camp. He was the father of my child, the one who took care and loved us both unconditional and the man that at some point I had grown to love. But standing in this very moment, my heart wasn't all his. I had to let go of the part that wasn't mine anymore. My life was only my own, it was Sarah's. Everything had to be perfect, for her. Things had to be changed. Enough was enough, I had to stop looking into my past and except this future with Ricky.
I looked into his eyes and held my breath. "Yes" I exhaled with teary eyes. As soon as my words were spoken Ricky smiled and held me in a tight hug. Twirling me around, I could feel his happiness throughout his body as I hugged him back. He placed me down suddenly and placed the ring slowly on my left ring finger, where surprising fit perfectly. He then kissed my hand.
He looked at me with a smile that made me smile back. "Amy you've made the happiest man on this earth" he chuckled.
He hugged me again and continued kissing my hair and whispered "I love you Amy".
"I love you too" I answered by almost immediately, because if it was partly true and he had to know that. I didn't say those words much but each time I said something felt more real.
He held my shoulders and looked at me, questioning. "Tell me why your answer is yes". I pulled him to sit with him.
"Ricky you deserve a part of me that's been hiding for a long time, the part that loves you in the same way you love me. Everything you've done for me and Sarah has been amazing." I cupped his cheek. "I've seen you become the man you are today, your: kind, gentle, patient, loving, and the father of my child." My thumb brushed along his bottom lip, "Because at the end of each day a part of my heart becomes yours. That's why I want to marry you." And I leaned in and kissed him. For the first time in a while I didn't pretend he was someone else. I was kissing Ricky.
I pulled back and Ricky still has his eyes closed, seeming surprised by my response. I giggled. He gently opened his eyes. "Now that was a kiss." We both shared a laugh.
"So it's settled, you'll go visit your parents and Ashley for a bit and I'll take care of Sarah." He said while leaving the room. I laughed while he left but as soon as I knew I was alone. My laughter faded.
I looked down to my ring that was so beautiful and it felt right to have it there. I've been confused for a long time now, but today was different. Today I said yes to a life with Ricky, life that held forever with it. It's true, my heart belonged to another but it's also true that Ricky was taking its place. Maybe not entirely but it was enough to prove that one day my whole heart would belong to Ricky.
Two suit cases was all it took to get everything ready. Almost a dozen pair of clothes,socks, underwear, and bras. Then there's a small purse inside the suitcase that carries my make-up and things I'll need when I take a shower. I would take things to do my hair with but I'm sure Ashley won't mind me using her things. Ricky got everything together and turned on the car for me.B0efore leaving my room and I walked back to my nightstand and took the letter. Funny how in some odd way my hand had almost a indention of where I carry the letter. I guess that comes from falling asleep with it almost every night. I opened the wrinkled letter for the last time and skimmed the words, hearing the words in my head 'Love you always,Ben'. I folded back in it's place. Opened my draw and placed it carefully inside, gently closing the draw. I walked out of my room and didn't look back. Saying goodbye to the voice, along with the words it speaks.
Now came the toughest part. Saying my goodbye to Sarah. Not that I wasn't coming back, but I've never been away from her.
I closed the door to the place I'd known to be home for the past three years. I could hear the kids laugh. But Sarah had a distinctive one, she had her fathers laugh, the kind that can ease your worries no matter how sad you feel. I could at peace forever just hearing that laugh.
"Mommy! Mommy!" Sarah screamed towards me. She jumped as she reached me. I held her tight, brushing her hair away from her forehead. "Hi baby" I smiled just by looking into her eyes. She held a lilttle sadness in her eyes, questioning mine. "Daddy says you go somewhere." It broke my heart not to take her with me.
"Just for a little while princess" Ricky said as he walked towards us. "Yea only a little while sweetie." I assured her. "And if you at any moment miss me so much that you can't take it anymore, just tell your daddy and he'll tell me, then I'll come straight home k?." I explained to her as I placed her down and got down to her eyes level. "M'kay." She answered, clearly hating this goodbye just as much as I was.
I kissed her forward and rosy cheeks before hugging her one last time. "Love you." "Wuv you too mom." She kissed my cheek, I quickly brushed my tears away before she could see . Ricky walked closer and whispered to Sara "Honey why don't you go into the house and after I finish talking to your mom, I'll order some pizza for us." He smiled trying to cheer her up which worked. Anything that involves pizza lets Sarah forget all her sad emotions. Sarah did what she was told. Ricky was always the one to make Sarah smile whenever she was down.
My eyes followed every footstep it for her to get into the house. As I heard the door close, I looked back at Ricky. "Take care of her Ricky." I asked. "You know I will." He responded back and I knew he was right. I had no reason to worry.
"Say hi to the family for me? Okay?" He asked and I nodded. He quickly kissed my lips and hugged me. I buried my head in his neck and breathed in his scent. I pulled back and kissed his cheek. "Bye Ricky." I said as I walked to the car. I open the driver side door and was about to climb in but something told me there was something else I needed to say before leaving. Before getting in I looked toward and said "I love you." and he smiled widely "I love you more." I smiled back And with that I climbed inside and and closed the door. As I drove away, I could see in my rear-view mirror that Ricky was still outside waiting for my car to make a left and the end of our street. Once I felt that no one was watching I carefully pulled out my cell and dialed two and pressed send. I waited.
. "Hello?" I smiled as I heard her voice. She sounded tired.
"Hi mom." was all I said. "Amy? Oh hi honey! Whats going on?"
"Um nothing. Just calling to tell you that uh," "Mom I'm coming home!"
Hope you like it. R&&&R please.
I'll try my best to get the next chapter up soon. But please be patient. :)