Disclaimers: Vampire Diaries, L.J. Smith's, etc etc
Request on my LiveJournal for a drabble: Damon as a pop star in the 80s. Like Rick Astley . A lot of crack.
"Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down, never gonna run around and desert you."
"Oh, god, not that thing again," Damon sneered at Bonnie's mobile phone as it rang. "Why does no one ever remember any of my other work?"
Bonnie stared at him dumbly. "Damon, 'Never Gonna Give You Up' was a Rick Astley song," she pointed out.
"You're not Rick Astley."
"I was, in the eighties," he affected a bored tone and inspected his nails. "I had a music career, toured the world, was adored by my fans..."
"But Rick Astley was famous! You're a centuries old vampire! Being a popstar would be too risky." Bonnie pointed out logically.
"Tell me, have you heard anything about Rick Astley since he stopped making music?" Damon pointed out reasonably. Bonnie's face scrunched up in thought before she finally admitted she hadn't. "That's because he disappeared completely. Ceased to exist. Why do you think I vanished?" he asked, a touch bitterly, "I was almost discovered and had to assume another identity. My career in the music industry was over."
"But..." Bonnie's eyes widened. "Ohmygod! You're Rick Astley!"
"That's what I said, yes." Then, leaving Bonnie glubbing after him like a goldfish, he left the room and shut the door behind him.
He paused to take in the sight of Stefan on the floor, laughing hysterically. He'd obviously heard the whole thing. "Oh, god, Damon! I can't believe she really thinks you're Rick Astley!" He managed to sit up and wipe the tears of mirth from his eyes. "Still, you're insane. The only reason anyone would want to lay claim to that song is if they really were Rick Astley."
"Yes, quite." Damon raised a brow and waited patiently as the cogs clunked in Stefan's head. If anything, he managed to achieve a shade of pale that shouldn't even have been possible for a vampire.
"But, I... you... I sent you..." Stefan choked up, unable to continue as he looked at his brother, fear in his eyes.
"I appreciated the gesture you made when you sent me your underpants. It was deeply disturbing, but I was flattered nonetheless."
Stefan squeaked in a very undignified and almost girly fashion before fleeing the hallway in embarrassment.
Damon watched him go, shaking his head sadly. Bonnie and Stefan were two of the most gullible people he knew; it was just too easy to fool them. The underwear had been a guess, but somehow Damon wasn't surprised that his brother had done it.
Whistling 'Never Gonna Give You Up', he sauntered off in the opposite direction to his brother, vaguely wondering if this entire joke counted as the ultimate Rickroll.