Title: "Infecten" (Middle English for "Infected" - to afflict with disease)
Fandom: Rockman.EXE (MMBN)
Genre: Romance. Humour.
Characters: Hikari Netto (Hikari Lan), Rockman (Megaman), Hikari Yuuichiro (Dr. Hikari), Blues (Protoman) Ijiuin Enzan (Chaud Blaze). Others mentioned.
Rating: PG-13 for implied… intimate intercourse between consenting, cybernetic/virtual young males. XD;;
Disclaimer: Rockman.EXE, its characters, places and themes belong to Capcom, Shogakukan, ShoPro, TV Tokio, etc.. No copyright infringement is intended.
Warnings: Shounen-ai. Implied sex.
A/N: To the plot-idea provided by my awesome niisan Kane. :) When I started it, I decided to have it set after the Virus Beast Gospel Arc, but it can fit nearly anywhere.
Summary:"…Rockman's got what?!"
"…Rockman's got what?!"
Enter Netto – twelve years old, spiky brown hair, puppy-like hazel eyes, currently freaked out to the moon and back. Rockman, on the other hand, was trying his hardest to blend with the walls of his PET, and failing rather miserably.
Yuuichiro Hikari regarded his son with practiced calm – the kind that comes as second nature to Doctors when they are delivering sad news to a patient's relatives — and proceeded to drop the bomb a second time over.
"The ICL Virus, Netto."
Rockman's recent drop in performance – his constant sluggishness, his tendency to literally fall asleep on his feet, his moodiness and considerable weakness – had already alerted Netto that his Navi was infected. But this… this he wasn't prepared for.
"The ICL, Papa?"
Weakly. The you-got-me-terrified-enough-now-PLEASE-tell-me-you-were-lying kind of weakly.
Yuuichiro put a reassuring hand on Netto's shoulder and gave a squeeze, smile never faltering.
"You know it's a fairly harmless malware, Netto. Although we cannot fully get rid of it, we can quarantine the infected files and have Rockman run on…"
Netto chose that moment to start spluttering.
"That's not it, Papa! You said that… that… that thing can be transmitted only by… by…"
"Intimate intercourse, yes," Yuuichiro repeated patiently. A Buddha couldn't have conveyed any more serenity.
Sadly, it failed to affect Netto any.
"But Navis can't do it!" the boy cried out, voice cracking and getting shrill on the last word or two.
Yuuichiro bestowed a sympathetic look upon his son, switching from Doctor-mode to Parent-mode in the blink of an eye. The hand tightened comfortingly on Netto's shoulder. Rockman – who was currently browsing his database for an invisibility program – just blushed. Netto's eyes flew from one to the other and back, slowly widening to thrice their normal size.
"Of course they can't have sexual relations, Netto. That's an activity only carbon-based organisms can engage in; and while Rockman's outward appearance is humanoid, he remains a cybernetic organism, based on virtual data." Sheer calm incarnated. "But of course Navis have an equivalent for it, which is just as passionate and meaningful as human intercourses," he added.
"And it's by engaging in this equivalent with another Navi, that Rockman got infected."
Rockman scanned his surroundings for a conveniently-placed Deep Dark Hole to hide in. When he found none, he turned towards the still-gaping Netto, bracing himself for the outburst.
It was a whole octave lower than he'd expected – but he was glad he'd tampered with the PET's acoustic sensors nonetheless.
"We were going crazy with worry, we went as far as thinking this could be another of Wily's ploys to get you down, or an attack from some crazy maniac, or a collateral revenge towards Sci-Labs, and you got this… thing rolling in the hay with – Oh, no!" Netto slapped both hands to his mouth, eyes so huge they swallowed the rest of his face. "Roll! Meiru! How am I going to explain this to her? She'll hate me. She'll kill me! She'll hate me and kill me and resurrect me just long enough to kill me again and then she'll--" he paused to take a breath, which was all the opening Rockman needed.
"What's Meiru got to do with this?"
Rockman blinked right back at him.
"…what do you mean 'what'? Roll is her Navi, and if you infected her, Meiru will surely…"
"Err… Netto-kun…" The way he was squirming, one would think Rockman was standing on an ant nest. "It's not… it wasn't Roll I've…you know… with."
His cheeks were the colour of apples now, those crisp, fragrant apples of summertime and kitchen fairytales, and were getting steadily darker.
"But she's the only female Navi you know!"
Insert an awkward pause here.
Rather long, too.
Netto's brain took a full minute to make all necessary links, and properly encode the data it'd been supplied. Yuuichiro chuckled over the rim of his open laptop. Rockman decided he wanted to curl up and turn off.
Besides, if he got any more red in the face he might just develop enough heat to spontaneously combust the circuits of his PET.
When Netto's mouth decided it was time to function again it opened, then closed, then wrinkled in a frown, then opened again, sucked some much-needed air in, and generated a whisper that translated more or less into:
"You… mean… you…"
Before it stopped functioning again.
Small and sad and so very-very apologetic. Netto shook himself out of his daze.
"I'm… all right with it. I guess. Besides, Navi's genders work differently than ours, right? It's just…" he sighed, taking off his bandana to fiddle worriedly with it. "Who?"
Rockman ducked his head. He blushed.
"I'd rather not say."
Not when you're likely to go and delete him for infecting me, no.
Netto made a noise in the back of his throat, weighting out options, considering.
In a tone that clearly meant: hopefully not.
"Glyde? Iceman?" Rockman threw a random object at him, though what good could it make through the PET screen was anyone's guess. "Guess not. Mhh… Thunderman? Quickman? Woodman? Knightman? Sharkman?"
"No! No, no, no, no!"
Yuuichiro's input. And one with reliable foundations, if the matter-of-factly tone was anything to go by.
Both boy and Navi turned to look at him: one with eyes wide as saucers (and blushing comely), and the other with his jaw dragging on the floor, both equally surprised. Yuuichiro surveyed them with a gentle look on his face. Reaching out, he tapped the PET screen with his fingernail; an affectionate gesture, like a father tapping his little boy's nose during a gentle lecture.
"With the way you two react to one another, that was the most likely conclusion. You two are… what would you call it…? … 'an item'. Aren't you, Rockman?"
A squeak. Rockman's cheeks turned even redder than before, a tell-tale tremor taking hold of his bottom lip, then spreading to his back and hands.
Netto — surprise, surprise — gaped.
"With Enzan's Navi … Enzan's Navi… you've been… …you've… you've… you've been with Enzan's Navi!"
Accusingly. Because being with a Navi, even a male Navi, was all right. Because keeping the knowledge from him was also acceptable, in the long run. But being with Enzan's Navi of all people, Enzan's Navi,E
Navi was, like, TEH ultimate offence.
"And he must have been on the receiving end," Yuuichiro supplied helpfully, "for the infected data to get into his systems." Checking the readings on his laptop, eyes crinkling in thought, nodding as if to say: 'yeah, on the bottom for sure.'
Netto kept impersonating a fish for a couple seconds more, then bolted for the door, blazing with the righteous fury of a scorned Net-Op.
"That's it! I'm killing Enzan! And I'm making it slow and painful!"
Rockman's pleas for him to stop and reconsider – and pleasepleaseplease not delete Blues while he was at it – echoed down the corridor, stopped for the minute or so they were inside the elevator, then floated up from downstairs once Netto marched out into the open, bandana back into place, rollerblades glinting in the low light.
Alone in his office, Yuuichiro shook his head in fond amusement. For a long moment, he toyed with the notion of phoning Enzan and give the boy a head start, then figured that he did deserve whatever grievance Netto was about to unleash upon him - what was he thinking, letting a virus-carrier Navi loose in the net? - and began typing speedily on his laptop.
He wondered: by combining the data of two different Navis, like Rockman and Blues had combined theirs, what were the chances of creating a… oh.