Disclaimer: I do not own 21 Jump Street
Disclaimer: I do not own 21 Jump Street. Oh, there is a lot of angst in this and some Hanhall so I hope there's something here for every Jump Street fan. Also, reviews are the Hanson to my Penhall so you know what to do :)
Thomas Hanson looks down at the bullet wound in his chest and lets out a heaving sigh before closing his eyes and going home. Home to see his father yet once again.
Wishing didn't do you any good, especially when that wish was something impossible – the wish that just maybe – maybe – he would look at you the way he looks at her.
Everything is difficult, nothing comes easy. It had been a lesson his father at taught him and instilled into him like "please" "thank you" "yes ma'am" and "no sir." Except his father probably didn't know how difficult this was – knowing that you don't look at her like you look at him and knowing you never can. Because face it, she'll never be Doug Penhall.
Names don't mean much, especially to a guy like him. But one name meant everything, the whole world in fact. It was a name that brought together two very different men, it was a name that instilled justice in the society, it was a name that popped gum, cursed teachers, wore ripped jeans and flannel print shirts. McQuaid. To Tom Hanson, that was the only name that meant anything.
Time was running out. They had to catch that son of a bitch that had Judy. No one messed with anyone on the force, especially Jude, without asking for trouble. Doug shoved the scared looking, acne ridden teen against the locker while Tommy patted his cheek gruffly, "Tell me where she is, Davy, or you'll never see the light of day again."
Youth can never last. Despite the wishing, despite the serums, despite the surgeries, nothing can keep you youthful. It's a fact of life. Everyone ages, including the officers at Jump Street. They knew it was part of the job before signing on but when Fuller released them from the undercover duties, they didn't imagine the pain would feel quite like this.
Once upon a times and happily ever afters are only found in fairy tales. Tom Hanson learned that a long time ago – nearly ten years ago. There was no such thing as a happily ever after, only a time where things might just not be as bad as you thought. Doug Penhall was determined though to change all of that. He vowed to himself he'd make Tom see the happily ever afters, even if that meant he'd become his own Prince Charming.
Now was the time. Tom knew there was no going back now. If he walked into that building, he would never come out alive. He would die in there. Was he ready? Was he prepared? If it meant saving a life, if it meant saving Doug's life, then yes. It was all worth it.
Enigma: that was the perfect word to describe Tom. He wasn't the type of guy to spill his guts out to just anyone. It took someone special to make him open up if even the slightest bit. No one thought that being threatened with having Doug sit on him would make him talk but it did. He talked. He told them everything.
Justice had always been important to him, ever since Charlie pulled up to the front of the high school with his head down and his eyes moist. Tom knew that there had to be justice. No one deserved to die. Not his father, not anyone. So as the gun balanced in his hand, he glared at her killer and swallowed so hard his throat hurt. Don't kill him, Hanson, he thought to himself. Sighing, he put down the gun. This wasn't his life to take. No life was his to take.
Unhappiness was not something new to the team. Unhappiness came with the job. There would be times when things wouldn't make sense, there were times when they didn't catch the guy, there were times when they were shot, when they were in the hospital, and when they died. But nothing prepared him for this. Nothing prepared him for the death of his friend, his brother, his lover – Tom Hanson.
Matches never seemed to light when he needed them. He growled as he slid the stick against the wooden box. A flame flickered and he smiled as he held the flame to the cigarette. He hadn't wanted to start smoking. All his life he thought it to be a disgusting habit but now, now it was the only thing that calmed him, made him forget. Made him forget that if he had just gotten there sooner, that boy wouldn't have had to die.
Pennies in the fountain flickered as the sun hit them. They flickered with a false hope, a false hope of life. Doug rolled his eyes as he flipped the penny off his thumb. It hit the bottom of the fountain and he closed his eyes and begged, "Please let her be alive. Please don't let them be hurting her again. Please let me find her."
Singing wasn't something he was too fond of. Especially karaoke. But when Jump Street had a karaoke night, he couldn't exactly say no. So as he adjusted the mike and looked out to the crowd, he saw Doug's face and it gave him peace. He could do this. He could arrest, fire a gun, and even shoot people if it came to it, surely he could sing War! (what's it good for). Surely he could.
Traces of lack of sleep lined his face. He groggily walked over to his desk and flopped into the chair. He would have to get rid of that damned Whip Cream if he ever wanted to get some sleep. Damn Doug and his damn Whip Cream!
Reaching out, his hand brushed his left cheekbone. Doug smiled at the touch. He was perfectly created, perfectly chiseled, perfectly perfect. And oh those cheekbones! Did Tom even know what he was doing to him? Of course not. Doug laughed silently as he planted a kiss on his partner's forehead. So this was what it was like to fall in love!
Eagerness overcame him as he tore open the box only to find a…whoopee cushion? Tom shot Doug a look as Doug explained what it was for. Now, Tom wasn't too thrilled with the idea of sitting on a whoopee cushion but it was the thought that counted. Doug might be taking this whole apology thing too far, but at least he was sorry. He was sorry and he cared. Suddenly a whoopee cushion didn't seem like such a bad gift.
Everyday you learn something new. Today Doug Penhall learned that despite how much you love someone, it doesn't to you a bit of good. They always leave. They always leave and never come back. The apartment door creaked open and Tom walked over and wrapped his arms around Doug's neck, "I had to step out and clear my head. You didn't worry did you?" Tom asked. "Nah," Doug shook his head, "Not a bit." Every day you learn something new. Today Tom Hanson learned that Doug Penhall is a terrible liar.
The memories were a comfort. They provided a shelter to him when life was tough. When he was down, all he had to do was remember, remember Jump Street, remember Judy, remember Ioki, remember Fuller, remember Penhall and he was instantly put in higher spirits. He would give anything to be back at Jump Street. Anything at all. Doug had been right. It wasn't the job, it was him. His bed was made, now the only thing Tom could do was sleep in it. And think of what was. And what could have been. At Jump Street.