Notes: Inspired by the events in Castle Gloria surrounding the "Finding Endless Love" troll-fic fiasco of July 2008.



The Major jolted awake, his own cry of alarm dragging him back to consciousness.

"Shhh, Major."

The Major struggled to concentrate his muddled brain as he tried to remember where he was and what was happening. Nothing. All he knew was that he was lying on a bed in a darkened room, soaked with sweat. Someone was applying a cold cloth to his forehead. When the "someone" spoke again, he recognized the voice as belonging to Eroica.

"Get…away from…me, you…pervert…"

To the Major's annoyance, this growled out order was met with a delighted cry from the Earl. It was followed by him calling out, "G! He's awake!"

The fact that at least one of his men was close at hand was a relief, even if it was G.

"Are you sure?" came G's timid inquiry as he entered the room.

"Shut up, the both of you," the Major snapped, a hand going to his head. "You're giving me a headache." He struggled to sit up, only to fall back with a groan.

"Not so fast, Major," Eroica admonished. "You need to take it slowly."

"What the hell…?"

"You gave us quite a scare," Eroica went on. "That drug the KGB gave you had you hallucinating. Your men were able to get you away before—"

The Major stopped listening, his mind flashing back to his mission. Of being jostled in a crowd as he trailed a KGB courier. Of the stranger running headlong into him. The sharp prick on his arm and the disorientation that followed shortly after that. The last thing he recalled was a woman—a slip of a girl with ridiculously long, black hair—asking if he were alright. Eroica appearing out of nowhere to push her aside. Then…

"Major…? Would you like some water?"

The Major returned to reality with a jolt when G spoke. He looked up to see Eroica and G staring down at him. "Don't just stand there, get me that water!" To his annoyance, the Earl broke into a dazzling smile while G gave a squeak of delight. Idiots!

A glass of water was quickly produced. The officer slowly drank its contents, wishing it were something stronger. Something that would erase the horrifying images from his mind. The Earl chasing that boy Caesar Gabriel again. Himself acting like a pre-pubescent teenager towards a…a…woman! Himself eating chocolate cake. And enjoying it!

This last thought caused the Major to gag.

"Take it slowly, Major," Eroica admonished gently. "You don't want it back up again."

The Major responded to this with a glare of annoyance but did not comment. He handed back the glass and laid back, closing his eyes. He would erase the horrible, drug-induced dream, nightmare, hallucination! from his memory. It would take time and effort, but he would do it. He was Iron Klaus, after all, and still had a mission to complete.