Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from the "Twilight" series. All are Stephanie Meyer's.
Quick Note: This is the second encounter between Edward and Bella, still on their honeymoon. Same rules apply, it was made to fit into the book and is what i feel an accurate representation of what Stephanie Meyer could have - but did not - write. Made with complete care and sensitivity, don't expect any overtly OOC-ness here. Made just as carefully as the first story i wrote. Please enjoy.
P.S., this one cuts off... Book One: Bella, Chapter 6, page 108.
Nightmares, as far as they go, have never been so beautiful as the one I had just had. If you called it a nightmare, it was only because seeing the end of it tore your heart and sickened your stomach. The moment my eyes opened and I knew Edward wasn't really caressing me, loving me, the tears exploded from my eyes franticly. Now I was positive God was torturing me, showing me what I wanted and always taking it from me when I thought it could be real. Even now I can't explain how my mind played out the way Edward fearlessly touched me, with no inhibitions and with the love I knew he had for me. I knew as long as I was mortal, that could never be achieved. There was too much danger. He had already massacred Esme's pillows, which means the urges he gets when with me need to be filtered one way or another. As long as Edward wasn't tearing me apart, when we were together I cherished every second.
My body was lying overtop of him, my weight pressing against his wintry skin as goosebumps covered my chest and stomach. I never thought we would be making love again after the first time. It absolutely shattered his confidence in himself when he saw the bruises he'd inflicted on me. Of course they were nothing in my mind, but he took them as a sign he wasn't careful enough. To me, he wasn't letting go enough. I had yet to see Edward without a cringe on his porcelain face while our bodies were interlocked. That needed to change. Though I did feel guilty for forcing my emotions upon him when I didn't know where they were coming from, all I knew was after a dream like the one I had, If I didn't find release I would break apart and never be fixable.
Hot tears still flowed freely down my cheeks as I kissed Edward. He wasn't fooling me; his reluctance was clear as he avoided grabbing me in any way. Frustrated, I clutched his face between my hands and pulled away from our kiss.
"Edward," I sobbed, "Please. You won't hurt me, you've never hurt me." His mouth opened to protest but my finger halted his lips. "If you love me, you'll do this." Unblinking, he stared into my hard expression. His topaz eyes shred my self-control to ribbons. Forcefully I lunged toward him and felt his rigid body foil my forethought to knock him to the bed. My bones knocked against his steel chest as I laced my arms around him and softly placed a desperate kiss to his tense, stiff mouth. Yet, he willingly embraced me and skillfully flipped and lay me down so he was hovering above my shaking frame. Suddenly changing from stern to soothing, his face came against mine and our embrace became confining.
Underneath him I couldn't move, and I struggled weakly to free my arms, but he did not let me gain an inch of mobility. Releasing from my lips, he cocked his head to one side and studied my squirming frame. The feeling of not being in control was one I wasn't completely used to. Obviously Edward wanted complete control this time.
Trailing kisses to my neck, I felt his tongue brush against the pulsing flesh there. Edward's teeth ran across the rhythmic beating of the veins in my neck and caused a torrid flame of red to rush to my face. Breathing deeply, Edward drank the scent of my pulsating blood into his lungs, and I could tell it was searing his throat. His marble chest rose and fell with the intake, and when his eyes opened his alloy irises expanded greedily, taking in the light from the moon coming through the small picture window. The flash of sudden blackness in his stare didn't frighten me.
A pang of sorrow echoed in my mind, for I knew I was putting him through another opportunity for disaster. I was causing him more pain than pleasure, I was sure.
Intoxicated, Edward drunkenly flexed his muscles, restraining from breathing as the flood of thirst cascaded over him. As he straddled me, I placed an ensuring hand upon his chest, not sure if I was helping or not. His eyes fluttered open and glanced down at my hand softly placed on his austere pectorals. He took my hand away, and guided it to rest beside my head, where his fingers ran across my face, following the trails my delirious tears had left behind.
"Don't worry." He breathed, holding my attention softly with the ministrations of his cool fingers. I closed my eyes and sighed as his fingertips explored the contours of my face, and ultimately came to rest behind my neck, buried in my haphazardly scattered hair. Descending to mine were his lips, tenderly pressing upon my lips. His tongue found it's way into my mouth and I groaned when it ran across my lower lip, tantalizing me. With each passing moment my hunger for him increased, and I threaded my legs with his persuading him to continue. Scratching the impenetrable skin of his back with my fingernails, I separated our lips and embedded my head into the crook of his neck, breathing in the unnatural perfume that he always radiated. I took the liberty of skimming my teeth evocatively across his sleek and muscular shoulder. Had I known the impact this was going to have on him, I would have done it much sooner.
His breath hitched, and Edward's arms suddenly seized me vigorously and with a new found haste. Roughly he compressed our bodies together as his ravenous kisses conquered my mouth. Brought to my knees by his crushing embrace, I felt the fabric between us and decided I didn't want it to obstruct our bare skin any longer. As if I had said this out loud, Edward took in my clothed state. Still upright, he slid his hands up my stomach and stopped to rest them hanging on the cloth underneath my arms.
Capturing the black lace on either sides of me, he tore the straps loose and the force punched holes where his fingers pulverized and broke through the dissolute fabric. The little boundary that had kept us apart was tossed to the foot of the bed, asunder. Breast to breast, his frosty skin brushed mine and sent a trickle of excitement down my spine. Edward inhaled offhand and took in once again the redolence of my hair, breath and blood. Shuddering, maddened by the effect I had on him, he took both his index fingers like pins and softly jabbed them through the black lace underwear on my hips. Gesturing upward as if opening a letter with a knife, the cloth hitched and fell from me and the cool feel of air let me know I was now completely naked. Wasting no time, Edward coiled his arms around me and used his weight to press me firmly to the mattress.
At some point that evaded my memory, Edward has lost his underwear, because I could feel the frigid skin of his thighs touching mine. Hopelessly wishing he would use all his strength and crush our bodies together, I took the initiative and elevated my hips so he would feel our lower halves make contact.
Edward drew away suddenly, surprised at my action. He peeked up towards my face and saw that I was eager for him to unite us. Drifting around his legs, my legs flexed and pleaded him to lean forward. Instead, his face traveled over my stomach, laying sweet kisses along the way as his hands smoothed over the cold marks his mouth left behind. Eventually making his was to my lips, he placed a fragile kiss to them. At that instant, his brow twitched and he swiftly brought himself into me.
A little surprised, I jerked upward and ricocheted off of his taut frame. The familiar sensation of attachment made me choke on my breath and shut my eyes in mild discomfort. Still and waiting, Edward stared down into my expression with guilt and disgust. I opened my eyes and brushed my lips against his chin. Smiling encouragingly, I wriggled underneath him and knew he could feel what I was trying to do. He set his hand against my stomach to stop me from moving, and the red imprint of his cool skin against my burning skin lingered. Refusing to be ignored I continued to struggle to break free of his cage-like arms. Managing to get one arm free, I used what strength I had to clamp against and give myself some leverage and crush into him, pushing, sending Edward over sideways; surprised. If he had not have been off-balance I wouldn't have gotten free, but now I was on top of him and he was beneath me, still looking stunned. Mimicking him, I laid my hand on his stomach to stop his protests. As soon as I had shifted my weight, I realize that we were still connected. Edward hissed throatily as I sat straddling him. Shifting again I too sensed the quiet rapture I had so missed.
Leaning forward, I locked our lips before continuing to maneuver above him. My hair spilled over my face and tented our faces as we moved and fit together so easily, as simple as the first time. Slowly I began to feel safe with this, Edward wasn't in a position to hurt me. Maybe he could let go and show me what I knew he really wanted too, show me his powerful emotions without causing me harm.
Building inside, the ecstasy I had only known once before was piling up, waiting to be knocked down and crash into my ever-waiting body. Our hips rose and fell, meeting perfectly each time and sending jolts through the pit of my stomach. Clawing at the bed sheets I breathed heavily, closing the distance between us and driving my mouth to his. Immediately I regretted this, because Edward flipped and rolled to have me underneath him.
He growled attractively and all thought and remorse was lost as he moved over me the way I was happily acquainted to. The mounting sensation insisted as Edward flowed above me. All I could consciously do was dig my fingers into the curvature of his lower back and try to keep my sanity. Speeding up, Edward elicited another sensual breath.
There was no way I was going to survive this. My body couldn't hold all the emotions the threatened to drown me already when it all wasn't even over yet. The sweltering fluid feeling was diffusing from my core once again, and I knew that if Edward didn't stop soon I was going to explode from the inside out. Beads of sweat cascaded down my temples and showered my pillow and my head tossed and my neck arched.
I could feel the end near, and a blaring cracking noise from behind me triggered my release. Exhaling a long breath outward I had been holding, the cataclysmic quake that rocked me forced my lungs to compress and inflate with the humid air around me. I clenched my teeth and sighed as the rush knocked me senseless and the raging heat flew across me. It engulfed my bones and dipped between my insides evasively. Grinding my teeth and stretching my back I prayed for more time with this beast that Edward had unleashed on me. I reveled the feeling, and as I had before welcomed it and bathed in it, it subsided just as torturously as I remembered. Inwardly I sobbed, wishing the tingle would come back to me and take refuge in the pit of my stomach where it was always conceived.
Ebbing and fading just like the aftermath of a storm that leaves you with an eerie, agonizing calmness, the feel was gone.
As I was peaking, I could feel Edward tightening also, clenching above me. Rippling impressively, his muscles groaned and his face tensed, not at all ruining his beautiful features. Finally, I watched his expression delight as his former cringing guilty pleasure was replaced with a more peaceful and euphoric expression. The last pulses of heaven shivered through him, and left our bodies empty and sore. Well, mine was sore. Though not as much as the first time, which I had expected.
He slumped into me comfortingly as I lay exhausted beneath him, the frozen temperature of his body cocooning me and soothing my feverish skin. Sleep threatened to overtake me, but Edward's transition to my side caused me to open my eyes and shift so I was lying on his chest. The covers were lifted and spread over us, and Edward's aromatic breath drifted over me each time it expelled.
I could feel his eyes roaming my exposed flesh, looking for any signs of pain he may have inflicted on me. I huffed in disapproval and he responded by burying his nose in my hair and kissing the top of my head lovingly.
All the despair I had felt when I awoke had completely disappeared, the unreachable dream now replaced with reality as this night was etched along side the previous perfection.
"Bella." Edward's voice echoed in my ears. It wasn't a question, It was only a statement. He said it in a way that I was sure he was slightly frustrated that I had broken his 'unwavering' decision to not make love to me while I was still human. Guilt didn't once flash in my mind, because I knew he enjoyed it just as much as I had.
Mind dead, I allowed my limbs to go limp and gave in to the inevitable human act of sleep.
Losing the battle against the black sheet that clouded my vision, I let myself descend, which took me to a place where dreams did not exist. For that I was sort of glad.
Then it was only dark, and only me, plunging deeper.
Please Review, all comments are appreciated! Tell me if i should continue to write these stories, there are many parts in Breaking Dawn (such as this) that have been left unfinished!