Meta- A Discussion of Christian Bale as Bruce Wayne/Batman
Kayla: After seeing Batman Begins I was convinced of Christian Bale as the better Bruce Wayne "Billionaire Playboy" (Nicole making air quotes) but I still thought Val Kilmer was the best Batman.
Nicole: I love his voice….
Kayla: (laughing) Okay, so lets say you're robbing a bank… in a bikini, just for the hell of it (and the distraction)
Nicole: (hand waving) Yay! Boobs!
Kayla: Yes, boobs. And Batman swoops in to save the day or the bank or what have you.
Nicole: - and he pops off in that deep manly voice (incoherent garbled noise)
Kayla: Yeah, and you in your bikini exclaim "My! Your voice is horrifically attractive….." And Batman goes "Meh? I don't know how to appropriately respond to this situation!"
Nicole: (in the background choking on her ginger ale) I just saw Christian Bale in a BIKINI!! Oh god!! (devolves into hysterical, near manic giggling)
Kayla: Right. So. You're robbing the bank. Turned on by the guy… in a BAT suit….. and he is confused and also, much to his dismay, kinda turned on…..
Nicole: (proper) And here we come to the crux of the matter—Christian Bale Awesome Bruce WayneFan-freaking-tastic Batman (have you seen the dark knight?!)
Kayla: Yes. That would the point I was trying to make… before you mentioned Christian Bale in a bikini.
Nicole: (making invader zim angry hands ) and even worse! IT WAS HOT PINK!! Hot pink is NOT his color!
Kayla: As I was saying…
Nicole: At least it wasn't a Speedo, or even a thong bikini, or OH! A sock! With sequins and a little face on the end! (Hysterical laughter)
Kayla: Imagine he comes cloaking in… just off his yacht… all decked out in his Bat suit, except for the pants…. So you get, cloak, cowl, chest armor…
Nicole: And penis..
Kayla: and the joker staring, with a nitrous bomb—'so..you're pretty..uhm..comfortable with yourself…aren't ya?'
Nicole: And Bruce. Toooootally oblivious.
Kayla: Definitely a better Batman than Val….
Nicole: (blushing) Yep…definitely.