The Terror of Giving Tobi Driving Lessons

Little Tsu: This is something that I had made into a comic, but since I don't have a scanner & thus unable to put it up here, why not make a little oneshot fanfic about it. Also, another of my personal oc's is in this one so she's the only one I actually own.
Enjoy please.^^

This was supposed to be a nice and relaxing day for once at Akatsuki HQ. A day where those who had hobbies could enjoy just not gonna happen.

"Deidara-sempai! Deidara-sempai!" The bubbly, cheerful voice came from the latest member of Akatsuki, Tobi; a bouncy, I guess you could say young, ninja with an orange spiral lollipop mask on came bounding over to his own partner, Deidara.

The blonde haired teen, who had often been mistakened for a girl on more than one occasion, cringed at the sound of the voice before glancing behind himself from over his shoulder with an annoyed, 'you have got to be kidding me' look upon his features. "Tobi, go away before I blow you up, un."

At hearing this, Tobi pouted and got teary eyed in his single eye hole. "But Deidara-sempai. You promised Tobi that you'd give Tobi driving lessons today. Tobi remembers cause Tobi is a good boy."

Deidara groaned slightly under his breath in annoyance as he remembered that he had faked a promise to the cause of his constant irritation if he would leave him alone and not bother him in the slightest for a whole entire week; a promise that he had had absolutely not intention what so ever of keeping! The young blond then however, thought of an idea and an almost mystievious smirk played his lips before he turned his attention back onto his lollipop masked partner.

"Sorry Tobi, but I'm really busy today. Leader-sama's wanting me to run some errands for him so I'm afraid I can't give you that driving lesson I promised, un." This only seemed to make Tobi even more gloomy than before and Deidara saw this. He smiled at his depressed partner and held up a finger in front of him. "But! I do know three members that aren't busy right now and they can give you that driving lesson instead."

Tobi immediately perked up at this and his visible eye gleamed in excitement at this. "Really? Who Deidara-sempai, who? Who's gonna give Tobi driving lessons?"

"Heheh. You'll see soon enough. Now come on Tobi. Lets go get your driving instructors, un." Deidara then turned back around and started to walk off with now a hidden, sly grin on his features and an evil glint in his eyes.

Tobi, having no clue about the expression on his partner's face, just happily followed. Deidara had one evil plan up his Akatsuki robes...One that the three he was going to get to take his place would regret dearly for it.

When Deidara finally spotted the three mean, driving instructers, he hurried over with a bright smile on his face. The three were two tall older male ninja standing at around 5'10-6'4 while the smaller ninja was female and standing at only five feet even.

The tallest ninja was the blue skinned, shark-like Kisame Hoshigaki while the other male was the silvery gray haired Jashinist and personal ritual psycho, Hidan. The female of the trio though, was a fifteen-year-old girl with long silvery white hair and golden orange eyes. She was a ninja from Suna known as Kyone Gakure; her headband resting around her neck like a dog collar.

When they saw Deidara and Tobi hurrying towards them, they had a bad feeling something was going to happen, but were unsure of what exactly. It was then that the blonde spoke up. "Just the ninja I was looking for. I have a favor to ask of you, un."

Kyone arched an eyebrow at this while the two older males just gave him a funny look. "Man, what the hell are you up to this time girly?" Deidara got an annoyed look on his face at hearing Hidan call him 'girly', but then just forced himself to calm back down as he grinned once more.

"Well, Leader-sama is wanting me to run a few errands for him, but I made a promise to Tobi here. Think you can take my place and go through with the promise I gave to Tobi, un? I'll pay you back, I promise."

Kisame was still giving him a funny look as he wasn't sure what Deidara was trying to pull here, but then smirked as he shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly. "Sure, why not? I mean, what harm could it be to go through with a promise given to Tobi, right?"

The young girl was silent for a moment on this, but then nodded her head in agreement.
"Yeah, I guess it wouldn't hurt. I mean, Tobi is a fellow member of Akatsuki too after all." Since both Kisame and Kyone had agreed to this request, Hidan sighed to himself in slight aggravation and reluctantly agreed to the request as well. After all, he still wanted to spend some more time with the girl that he tended to call his partner; that he strongly favored over Kakuzu.

Deidara grinned at hearing this and nodded his head. "Thanks a lot you guys and..." He then took off quickly as he yelled out the last part. "Have fun teaching Tobi how to drive, un!" At hearing this, the three ninja who had agreed to take Deidara's place with the promise had their eyes wide in surprise and almost uneasiness at what they had just agreed to.

Somehow they just knew that they were going to seriously regret this.


Deidara was sitting on the couch watching TV with a relaxed, content look on his face. Itachi, the Uchiha of the Akatsuki, saw this and walked over to him with a calm look on his features. "...Weren't you supposed to be giving Tobi driving lessons today like you had promised?"

The blonde merely glanced up from his lounged spot on the couch and grinned up at the Uchiha. "Yep! But I got Kyone, Kisame, and Hidan to take my place instead, un. I had never planned on keeping my promise to that idiot, Tobi anyways, un"

Itachi just sighed at this and shook his head. "You do realize they're gonna kill you once they get back, right?"

"Correction Itachi...If they get back, un."


A black car was seen swerving all over the streets while the sounds of screaming were coming from within it...One scream was of pure joy while the other three of pure panic. Inside this car, Tobi had his arms up in the air with a gleaming, excited look on his lollipop masked face...While sitting in the driver's seat no less. "WHEE! Tobi is a good driver!"

Kyone, who was buckled up in the passenger seat next to Tobi, was screaming in a panic with tears in her eyes as she had quickly reached over, grabbing the steering wheel to try and keep the car from crashing into anyone or anything. "TOBI! HANDS ON THE STEERING WHEEL!"

In the back seat though, the two older males, Kisame and Hidan, were also in a screaming panic as they had grabbed ahold of the nearest thing they could get to in order to hold on for dear life which happened to be each other as tears were also in their eyes just like Kyone's were.

"WHAAAA! We're all gonna die and it'll be Deidara's fault!" Kisame had been the first of those two to scream while the much more colorful panicking came from of course Hidan himself.

"Damn you Deidara! I'm gonna fucking haunt your sorry ass for this! I swear to Lord Jashin on it! AHHHH!"


The sound of the entrance to the hideout opening and shutting once again was heard as Tobi skipped right on inside the HQ all happy and bubbly as usual, but with his robes all dirty and such.

Deidara saw Tobi and smiled, not really paying too much mind to the ninja's condition and instead, silently thanking anyone that he didn't go after all. "Hey Tobi. So how did your driving lesson go?"

Tobi smiled even more from behind his mask, which was cracked in a few places. "Tobi was doing really good, but then this big ol' tree got in Tobi's way and made us go CRASH!...Tobi lost the battle against the tree though."

Deidara smiled thankfully at this; now even more pleased that he had managed to get out of that promise.

"Oh Deidaraaaa."

Deidara glanced behind Tobi at hearing someone saying his voice in such a sweet manner, but then went pale as a ghost in the face when he saw three very ticked off,...very scary looking ninja that were equally messed up in appearance. Hidan was holding his triple crimson bladed scythe, shifting it in his tight grip while Kisame had taken his Samehada off of his back and Kyone suddenly had sand slithering around her while glaring at him through demon wolf teal colored eyes instead of her usual golden orange.

"...Uh oh, un."

Seeing the murderous look in their eyes, Deidara slowly turned around, only to suddenly take off running as fast as his legs would carry him while he screamed in a terror all through the halls of Akatsuki HQ with Kyone, Kisame, and Hidan right behind him.



Little Tsu: I personally always got a good laugh with this one so I figured I would share the laughter of this oneshot with the rest of you. Reviews are most loved & please tell me if you think I should keep writing fanfics. Thank you much.^^