Yah.

Disclaimer: No.

Blame: Capemaynuts.

SIAPNIAN: This is now established as a very firmly AU series, following up canon up to… oh, I'd say up to Midnight. But ignoring Rose's spontaneous appearance in Partners in Crime, and an impressive chunk of her hacking. So really, it's ignoring quite a bit. Yay!

WARNING: This is un-beta'd and might be slightly… off is the only word I can think of for it, so let's call it slightly off. It is slightly off because I've been watching as much Stargate as I can, and suddenly this series actually has a plot of some kind and this bewilders me somewhat.

This is part of the Celebratory Update Spam.

-BAD WOLF-

The Doctor was alone on the first trip out of their home universe— well, as alone as he could get these days, what with Kyle following him everywhere and her kittens generally getting into trouble. After some persuasion and maybe just a little tiny bit of locking the TARDIS doors, he had managed to get Donna to stay on Earth on the grounds that universe-hopping was dangerous and nasty and there was no telling what trouble she, or he for that matter, could get into an he'd much rather do this on his own anyway, see you soon, bye then.

And then, of course, there was the running back to the TARDIS, whereupon there came the slight locking of doors and scarpering before Donna had the chance to A. give him the worst headache in existence or B. destroy the ship's exterior trying to get at him.

Anyway, he was pretty much alone on his first trip. He doubted that he'd be able to hit the right universe on the first go, or indeed the sixteenth if he was being honest, but he was cautiously hopeful. That coupled with the fact that Kyle had informed him that she would not be very pleased if he missed his mark, so he was fairly sure he'd get at least close.

He'd hooked the little device up to the TARDIS. He'd always wanted one, but the Time Lords wouldn't trust him with the power to just flit from one universe to the next, so they never gave him the upgrade and never told him how it worked. He found, after a cursory examination, that it was fairly simple; black holes were gateways to other universes; the only problem with that was that the basic spaceship, even one so magnificent as the TARDIS, couldn't survive the gravitational effects. However, now that that wonderful, brilliant feline had found the upgrade, the timeship could use the black holes for interuniversal transport. She was an old ship (she sparked at him a bit for even daring to think about commenting on her age), but she said that she had been able to integrate the system quite nicely and could they please get on with it before she died of boredom?

Kyle mewed from where she was perched on the console, adding her own declarations of impatience, and he found that he was really faced with no choice in the matter.

He muttered something rude. Kyle flicked her tail at him and the TARDIS sparked disapprovingly.

He rolled his eyes. "Am I not allowed to say anything?"

Kyle laughed.

He growled slightly, angled the TARDIS a little bit forwards to make their flight a little easier, told his cat to hold on to whatever she could reach, and pulled the lever that sent them hurtling into the dead star.

-BAD WOLF-

When he regained consciousness, the TARDIS was weak, Kyle was disgruntled and the timelines felt different.

He grabbed the console and pushed himself to his feet, giving the spaceship a rapid examination. She was a little battered from the flight, but she'd be fine. He found one of her smaller power cells and imbued it with a few years from his own lifespan— it wasn't as if he didn't have far too many than he needed— and wobbled out the door.

As he stood on the pavement, it occurred to him that perhaps, just maybe, that whole walking-outside thing would have been very bad indeed had he not actually managed to land.

As his eyes focussed and he saw the pointed bits of metal poking in the general direction of his left heart, it occurred to him that that whole walking-outside thing had been very bad indeed, regardless of the supply of somewhat breathable (if being possessed of a bit too much nitrogen) air.

He considered going back inside the TARDIS and flying off, but she wouldn't have the energy to do much right now and he couldn't leave yet anyway. He might have got the right one; one never knew.

He surrendered. With any luck, he'd be able to hijack a conventional spaceship and get to Earth that way.

Luck was, apparently, with him; he only had to stay chained to a wall for two hours when a very familiar humanoid found him and let him free.

He gaped at his past self.

His past self gave him an odd look. "What are you waiting for?" he demanded of him, a little more harshly than was normal even for him. "Off you go."

"You're—" he said, and swallowed. He shook himself. "Sorry. Sorry. Just one question."

His past self glowered at him. Knowing his past self, he wasn't surprised.

"Seriously, just the one."

Silence. The Doctor took that as an invitation.

"Do you know Rose Tyler?"

He visibly flinched and fear stabbed through the Doctor's hearts.

"How do you know about her?" Nine asked, instead of answering. "And who are you, anyway?" The glare intensified.

The Doctor waved a hand in the air in a vague gesture. "Long story. Well, short. I'm you, a different version of you, and I'm looking for her."

There was silence for a moment.

"She's dead," Nine said shortly. "Killed by a Dalek."

The Doctor forced himself to breathe. "Right," he said softly. "Sorry. Okay, um," he continued (not his Rose, not his Rose, not his Rose). His heartsbeat was rapid and harsh and everything seemed to hinge on his next words.

"London," he said, "in the early 21st century."

Silence. Nine looked irritated.

"Are there any zeppelins in it?"

A frown.

"Zeppelins?" he repeated, confused.

"Take that as a no, then," said the Doctor, vaguely relieved, and promptly ran.

He leaned against the inside of the TARDIS doors, panting, forcing himself to remember that his Rose was still out there somewhere.

If all of his universe-hopping turned out like this, he thought, this was going to be a very long journey.

-BAD WOLF-

Think Nine might have been out of character there. Sorry. I don't write him a lot, as I'm sure you've noticed.

Right, now here comes the request. I am rapidly running dry on ideas for parallel universes, so I'm going to ask you to give me some of them to write. I'll write pretty much anything as long as it doesn't involve smut or characters I don't know, and as long as I think I can actually do it. Or want to do it in the first place. So anyway, off you go. I'd like to get at least sixteen before he hits the right one; counting this one, that gives me two— no, three— and only two are my idea in the first place. The other one is from the eternally helpful Capemaynuts.

Anyway, leave a bit of the multiverse for me before you go. .