Sorry for the reupload, the spacing was somehow deleted in the first one and I couldn't figure out how to fix it so I had to take it down.

Disclaimer: No, I don't own Naruto.

Pairing: GaaraxIno and maybe some others…

Summary: Midlife crises aren't supposed to be happening at my age. Unless you would consider it a quarter-life crisis. But never mind that; I just know I, Sabaku Gaara, have a problem. Isn't the first step to solving the problem is admitting I have the problem? I am not head over heels for Yamanaka Ino.

Part I: Idiots in Love

Midlife crises aren't supposed to be happening at my age. Unless you would consider it a quarter-life crisis. But never mind that; I just know I, Sabaku Gaara, have a problem.

Well, problems, plural, more to say. It was essentially a domino affect of doom.

What's the root of my problems, you ask?

Uzumaki Naruto. That blasted blond son of a bh and his incessant mouth.

I don't understand how I became friends with him in the first place. I actually don't even consider us mutual friends. His place was only good to sleep at when I am too wasted to go back home and deal with Temari and he uses me to get dates. Deal, done.

Anyway, it started when we finished a group date-luncheon thing—that I could've slept through—and we were heading back to Naruto's place, passing by the small downtown area.

And that's when I saw her. I'm not quite sure why my gaze lingered on her lithe form as she heaved in the heavy bucket of water and flowers in front of the store, gasping slightly as the water spilled onto her apron.

Now, Naruto, the moronic idiot caught my gaze and his mouth opened, eyebrows gaggling and I resisted the urge to smack him across the face.

I managed to get us home that day with him making a few exclamations about how I've finally been attracted to someone.

Personally, that girl wasn't that attractive. Okay, she was. But no one is flawless, so there must've been something else wrong with her. I'm not pessimistic or anything, just a realist. And besides, I've gone through a good 23 years of my life without needing the presence or assistance of what they call a 'significant other'. So, No and Thank you, I'd like to stay in my socially inept corner.

A few more times passing by that florist shop, Naruto managed to get a name and a number. And for me, an earache from her relentless talking about things that could matter less.

Now that must've been strange for her, two guys visiting a flower shop so frequently.

That's actually just questionable.

At any rate, her name is Yamanaka Ino; blonde with blue eyes, loudmouthed and narcissist. We went out a few times—in groups, just in case—and I think I've learned all I wanted to know about her within two months.

Which brings me to my current predicament, why the hell am I always thinking about her? There was nothing appealing to me about her besides looks. She talked too much. She wore too less. What do I think about her?

A bitch. A complete and downright bitch.

And I bet she knows it too.


Slamming the door open, I stomped into the dingy three bedroom flat. Kankurou waved to me from his spot in the kitchen, but noticing my expression, he slunk away.

I made my way to the living room, cursing quite a bit as I tripped over a box, next to another line of boxes.

"What the—?" You see, I haven't been home in almost three weeks. Naruto's apartment had all the necessities.

Kankurou popped his head into the hallway, "Temari-nee's stuff. She's moving in with that Nara guy."

Oh yay. What have I not suspected?

"Ah," I trudged past him, grabbing the beer of out his hand as I dropped myself onto the couch, "Goddammit."

Kankurou seated himself on the other side of the couch without another word and we watched some medical drama silently.

Okay, not really. It was all about relationships and stuff and my mind wandered towards her again.

I've never had this problem before, but this…this girl really bothered me. Do I dislike her that much? I've heard somewhere that if you really loathe someone, you'll end up thinking about them 24/7. I haven't even figured out what she did to irritate me that much in the first place, you know? Because if it was 'something else', Naruto-baka said that I was supposed to feel a 'spark of electricity' or 'butterflies'. Which, I don't. so it couldn't be what he was insinuating. Definitely not. Right?


There was really no other way, but to ask the advice expert. Or so he claims himself to be. I've never used that claim, that is, until now.

He looked a little bewildered, the beer drizzling down his shirt, "Wha—Huh?" Quite the Neanderthal.

"I have a question."

That must've come out too eerily since he gave me the deer-in-headlights look before tentatively nodding.


I paused. How should I word this?

"There's this girl…" I don't think he's noticed the beer still trickling down his shirt, "…and I keep thinking about her…" Now there's a look I've never seen him do, "…It really bothers me."

Before I knew it, the beer bottle slipped from his grasp and rolled quite nicely down his legs, sputtering as it went, the dumbfounded look still plastered on his face.

Ugh. I knew that idiot was useless. Why the hell did I ask anyway?

"Oh my god."

The gargoyle finally spoke.

"Gaara, you're in love!" He almost squealed, freezing me in place.



"Gaara! It's a surprise seeing you around here!"

Oh god, it's her.

"This is my boyfriend, Sasuke. Sasuke, this is Gaara."

"Ah, nice to meet you," I managed, hiding my grimace from the pink demon and her scowling escort.

"You too," He answered as we shook hands.

Then we stood around in awkward silence waiting for our tables. We could've all avoid this outcome if she hadn't talked to me in the first place. Damn this café for always being overly crowded.

"How are you doing? I haven't seen Naruto or you for awhile," Sakura flashed another smile.


The smile flinched, but nonetheless, stayed plastered, "So…are you here alone?"

Is there something wrong with that?



I know that voice. Actually, I know it way too well, considering my, uh, dreams the last few nights after Kankurou's blasted comment. Mulling it over, I've decided Kankurou was an A-class idiot. There's no way I could be in love. I didn't know what the hell love is in the first place.

Turning, I was greeted by the blue-eyed blonde.


Grinning she slapped me lightly on the arm, "How are you?"

"Good." The same answer.


A gasp from the blonde.

"Billboard brow!"

Then there was silence.

This was getting old. I just wanted to eat my lunch, finish my break and go back to work. I should've just picked some fast food joint.

"Ah, Sasuke-kun."

My eyes flickered towards her, watching her grin falter slightly. This was a tone I haven't heard from her before. Hurt? By what?


"Well," She grinned again, this time forced, "It was nice seeing you guys." Turning to me, she slapped my arm again, "See you around sometime! Café's too crowded, I'm short on time."

With that, she exited the café as quickly as she had appeared.

That was when I realized. As relationship-retarded as I am, that little exchange was still like gold in dirt. My mouth pressed into a thin line. The irritation growing in the pits of my stomach, but I wasn't sure who it was directed to this time. I just felt aggravated.

Who the hell is this Sasuke guy?

End: Part I

Sorry for making Gaara so OOC, I just felt like writing in his perspective. Since he doesn't talk or show much, I felt like he was the type that had a lot of thought behind everything he said or did. I'm planning to write this whole story in his POV only.

So, what do you think?

: Thanks for reading!

Ame no Megami