AUTHOR'S NOTES: If you've read a lot of my stories lately, you'll notice I've been on a DisabledHarry kick, starting with my story 'The Strength Within'. Not exactly. THIS was actually the first disabledHarry story I wrote and I found the disk this was on when I was cleaning out some stuff in my closet.

As far as the crossover part, this starts in England but will flip between England and San Fransisco, CA.

Read, review, and show your love!

HARRY POTTER: Magic the Dark Lord Knows Not

(Charmed Crossover)

The sun had just started to peek over the tops of the trees as Harry walked along the forest trail, lost in his own thoughts. Sirius was dead… Cedric was dead… both deaths wouldn't have happened if Harry hadn't been so foolish and reckless.

The forest opened up a bit and Harry stood at the edge looking at the sunlight pouring over the woods. All these deaths were his fault. Stepping closer to the edge, Harry could see that the ground wasn't as firm. He could just fall… it would be an accident… and he wouldn't have to worry about Voldemort.

It might hurt if he didn't die right away…

But physical pain would be welcome compared to what he felt…

Closing his eyes, he took two steps forward and disappeared over the edge of the ravine.


Allie Martin stared up at the ravine before looking at the sky. It was getting dark… if she didn't start climbing now she'd never make it back to the trail by nightfall. Walking to a rocky outcropping, she made sure her backpack was secure before finding her first foothold.

But just as Allie was about to start climbing she heard a groan coming from the ground by her left foot. Looking down, she gasped when she saw a teenager lying in the brush. "Oh, God…" Removing her backpack she dug around for her radio and hoped her friends had made it back to the truck. "Blake? Shelly? Come in. This is Allie… come in. Please be—"

"Allie? Where are you?" Shelly replied, sounding worried. "Are you hurt?"

"Not me," Allie replied, checking over the teenager and she was relieved to see that the kid was still breathing and had a good pulse. "Kid fell off the edge of the ravine. Get the paramedics here now!"

"You got it. Is your flashlight still working?" Blake asked.

Allie dug the flashlight out and tested it. "Works just fine."

"Signal me so I can find you."

Allie held the flashlight up and waited until she heard a voice above her. "Allie!"

"Down here!" Allie shouted back.

"Paramedics are on their way," Blake shouted as he disappeared from view. When he reappeared, he was climbing down, holding tightly onto a rope. Once down on the ground, he helped his friend splint the teenager's arm and leg. "So…" Blake said, looking at the kid. "What do you reckon? Accident… on purpose?"

"God, I hope it was an accident," Allie replied. "Cause otherwise someone either deliberately tried to kill—or at least seriously hurt—this kid… or something happened to make him think death was a great alternative to living."

The kitchen of #12 Grimmauld Place was silent, with a sense of anxiety and tension that was more than palpable. Everyone from the Order and Harry's friends was sitting at the table waiting… waiting.

Sirius had been found in an alley near the entrance to the Ministry of Magic barely alive and rushed to St. Mungo's Hospital.

And Harry had gone missing from his aunt and uncle's house and hadn't been seen for almost 24 hours now.

Ron Weasley looked at his watch and sighed. Dumbledore should have been back by now with news on Harry and Sirius. Next to him, Hermione Granger saw Ron's impatient look and took his hand, giving it a warm squeeze.. Ron smiled weakly and put his arm around her shoulders as she leaned her head on his shoulder.

Remus Lupin ran a hand through his disheveled brown and gray hair and sighed. He was concerned for Sirius, certainly, but even more so he was worried about Harry; especially after seeing Sirius fall through the veil and supposedly died. Lupin looked up quickly along with the others when they heard footsteps coming down the stairs into the kitchen. Albus Dumbledore looked grave as his normally bright blue, twinkling eyes ran over everyone assembled.

Molly Weasley stood up, eager to hear what had happened to Harry and Sirius. "Albus, how are they? Can we see them yet?"

Dumbledore smiled very faintly and decided to start with the update on Sirius. "Sirius Black is alive. I don't know how he's alive or how he came back through the Veil, but he's alive. Though I regret to say that his sight was irreparable damaged… there was intense nerve damage and the healers were unable to undo it." Hermione gasped, her hands flying to her mouth and Ginny let out a choked sob.

Mrs. Weasley's face was the only one with any light. "But- but he's alive. He'll… He'll be- Sirius will be okay?"

Dumbledore nodded. Ron looked up. "What about Harry? I-I mean.. that's good news about Sirius… Harry will be happy to hear it, but… Look, tell us Harry's going to be okay…"

Dumbledore's face fell. "I wish I could tell you Harry will be alright… He is in very bad shape. His left leg was fractured in 5 places, his right elbow and wrist were shattered, and-"

Ron stood up. "What happened? I mean, when can we go to St. Mungo's and-"

"Harry is not in St. Mungo's." Dumbledore said, quickly

Hermione looked at the Headmaster, her eyes wide. "Then where…?"

"He is in a muggle hospital. His grief and depression has led to the development of a magical block. No spells or potions are effective. Harry must heal as a muggle."

After a moment, Ginny asked the one question everyone was dreading the answer to. "Did Harry… Please tell us he didn't do this on purpose, please."

Dumbledore swallowed. This was the question he had been dreading. But he could not lie. That was what had put Harry in this position in the first place. "According to Tonks," he started, slowly. "Harry went to a park nearby. He went down the wooded foot trail and went to the edge of a ravine. It looks like he slipped. Whether he slipped on purpose or not… only Harry knows."

Mrs. Weasley's eyes grew steely. "Albus, tell us plainly. Did Harry… try to… kill himself?"

Dumbledore looked defeated as he said, "It would appear so."

"The poor boy!" Mrs. Weasley cried, sitting down. "First Sirius and now this."

Dumbledore looked grave as he went on. "Harry seems to have given up. He has no desire to work for a recovery. And with the injuries to his leg… even with rehabilitation… most likely Harry will have a profound limp." It was then that the most extraordinary noise was heard from Lupin. He swore: loudly and continuously for nearly 5 minutes.

Chief of Pediatrics Dr. Meredith 'Merry' Willison had had patients in bad shape who were depressed before, but nothing like the young man currently in her care. Harry Potter had been found by hikers late last evening and had been brought into the ER with fractures to the left leg and right arm.

In the trauma room, Merry had tried to very discreetly heal the boy's wounds, but her whitelighter abilities were useless. After IDing the boy, she had sent word to Headmaster Dumbledore who had come immediately. The two had tried everything, but nothing worked.

Standing in the hallway, Merry looked through the glass window of Harry's private room. The boy was lying motionless, his good arm and leg strapped down, his left leg in a cast and traction rig, his right arm in a cast and sling. Sighing, she opened the door and walked up to Harry. "Hi, Harry… I'm Dr. Willison… remember me?"

"Why are you here?" Harry said, in a flat, calm tone. "And why am I restrained?"

"Because the opinion of the pediatric psychologist is that you're suicidal," Merry said, succinctly. "You're lucky that fall didn't paralyze you."

"Doesn't matter…" Harry whispered. "I don't care anymore… What's the point of living if all you do is hurt the people you care about?"

Merry sighed and went to grab Harry's chart. "I'm officially putting you on suicide watch, Harry," she said, scribbling a note. "Harry… I know you're in a dark place right now but you have got to get through this." When Harry looked away, she left the room and went to the nurses' station and said to the head nurse, Cat Jeffries, "Suicide watch for Harry Potter."

Cat nodded. "Hey, listen… A man called for you earlier. A…" she looked around the desk and found a message note. "Professor Dumbledore." Handing the message over she said, "He wants you to call him ASAP."

Going to her small office, Merry dialed the number written on the note and waited until the Hogwarts Headmaster picked up. "Please tell me you have good news," Merry said, a note of desperation in her voice.

"Sirius is alive…" Dumbledore said, simply. "But he's blind."

"You have to bring him here," Merry implored. "Harry's is… Albus, I have seen depressed kids before. Harry is in trouble and he needs help." Glancing up when she saw a shimmer of blue and white lights, Merry's eyes widened when she saw a man standing there.

"I'll send Sirius over with Molly Weasley immediately," Dumbledore replied.

"Great… thanks…" Merry said as she hung up the phone. Looking at the man standing next to her, her usually cheery blue eyes grew stormy. "You've got a lot of nerve showing up now."

"The Elders wouldn't let me come sooner," James Potter replied, defensively. "I was forbidden from seeing Harry. So… how bad is it?"

"Leg's busted up pretty badly," Merry said, still angry at Harry's father. "Arm's in better shape… but Harry's magic is blocking me out. I can't heal him."

"So… what's going to…?" James tried to think. Magical blocks only happened when a witch or wizard had completely given up hope. "I have to see him, Merry. Please."

Merry sighed as she stood up. "Okay… but not until Dumbledore, Molly, and Sirius get here."

"Why wait?" James asked, impatiently.

"Because you're supposed to be dead?" Merry replied, sarcastically.

"Good point."