XD So I know this is horrible, writing another story. I'm pretty sure that I'll be done with it quickly, though. About ten chapters, I think. I'm already on chapter five, actually. :D Yay me!

And I know you probably think I'm anti Edward/Bella. I'm so not! I love them together - anything else in canon would be weird….but in fan fiction, on the other hand….it's nice to experiment. ;D And I just so happen to love Jasper, after reading a few fan fiction about him….

I hope you like this. Of course I do not own TWILIGHT. I do, however, live in Arizona like Mrs. Meyer. :D That count?

.no? Darn.

I also don't own "Iris" by the Goo Goo Dolls. The title of this story is in that song. I thought it was cute. And slightly misleading. :D Could mean any of the male Cullens/Hales. (Ha. Males. Hales…..that rhymes. :D)

.Enough babble I guess. Onward.

You're the Closest To Heaven I'll Ever Be


I sat on the closed suitcase, my chin resting in my palms. I watched as Alice ran from the closet to the different array of suitcases. Carlisle had told us that we'd only need a suitcase or two full of clothes to go to Alaska. The movers would be coming tomorrow to get everything else and ship it.

But of course Alice didn't understand the concept of 'one or two' suitcases. She had five laid out on the floor. One for shoes, one for casual, one for dressy, and the other two….I had no idea.

I knew that she was probably just trying to distract herself. Alice did not take the news that Edward thought it would be best to leave Bella, after the birthday party. I mentally flinched at the memory. I hadn't meant to lose control….

On the subject of leaving though….maybe it was for the best. But there was one thing that I wanted to clear up though.

Finally Alice finished packing, and we each took a few of her bags, and my single one, down the stairs. We put all the bags in Emmett's jeep, then he and Rosalie drove off. Carlisle and Esme were going to take Carlisle's Mercedes, and Alice was going to take her car. I told the three of them my plan.

"I'm going to go by Bella's house." They look slightly surprised, except for Alice, of course. "I want to apologize…" I explained quickly. "I don't want Bella's last memory of me to be of a monster." Esme's expression softened, and she hugged me before she and Carlisle left.

Alice grinned at me and I sighed. "I'm guessing that she forgives me?" I asked her.

"Of course," she chirped.

Despite Alice's reassurance, I still felt anxious. She touched my cheek tenderly, then skipped off to her car. I did the same - without the skipping.

I parked my Jaguar in front of Bella's home and cut the engine. I was glad that Edward didn't know about this visit, and there was no way that he would barge in when I was talking to Bella, since he had gone off early this morning to hunt. I knew that I was part of the reason why Edward thought it would best to leave Bella. My stupid loss of control on her birthday. And I knew that there was no way that Edward would want me anywhere near Bella.

But I needed to talk to her. I wasn't exactly sure why….but I had to.


There was a knock on the door as I sat at the table eating my cereal. I expected it to be anyone other than the person it actually was.


He stood in the door way, looking as beautiful as any of the other Cullens, Hales in the instance. His hands were in his pockets, and he grinned nervously when I opened the door. When I first saw him, standing there, I had a brief flash of him on the night of my birthday, his teeth snapping.

I quickly dismissed this though. I knew that wasn't the real Jasper. He'd just lost control for a moment.

"Jasper?" I questioned. "What are you doing here…."

"To apologize," he said quietly. "For my behavior the other night…." I cocked my head to the side.

"Oh…really?" I was surprised. He really didn't have anything to apologize for. But I told him to come in. He followed me to the kitchen table and I sat down to finish my breakfast. He spared a brief look at it, a look of disgust and curiosity on his face.

"Yeah yeah, I know it's no angry grizzly," I said, rolling my eyes.

He grinned, and it almost reached his eyes. "Yes," he agreed.

I sipped the milk in the bowl. "So…"

Jasper's eyes fell. "I wanted to tell you how sorry I am for your birthday. I was horrible. Of course I'd never mean to hurt you, but…" A dark look came into his eyes.

"It's okay." I shrugged.

Jasper froze, surprised. "What?" He asked.

"It's okay," I repeated.

"It's okay that I almost killed you?" he asked, incredulous.

I flinched. "Well….yeah. You didn't mean to lose control. It's just….a vampire thing. And I just so happen to be way to tempting, apparently. It's not really your fault…just a natural reaction."

He stared at me, unbelieving I think, for a moment. Then he shook his head. "Edward was right. You don't respond to all this appropriately." I blushed.

We sat there in silence for a long moment, and I couldn't help but ask the question that had been bothering me for a while. "Jasper?"


"I…I was just wondering…." I bit my lip, wondering if I should really ask. I decided it couldn't hurt. "I was wondering why you distanced yourself from me." He gave me an amused look, and I rolled my eyes. "Other than my blood filled body. I mean, in Phoenix in the hotel room you seemed just fine. When we got back though, you were back to your old self."

Jasper hesitated before answering. "It's hard to be around you. Close to you. Harder than all the others, of course." He paused, deliberating. "In Phoenix, I wasn't really focusing on your blood as much as my family and the danger at hand. It was….a mind over matter thing." I grinned. Of course Edward had said the same thing.

"But when I came back…I wasn't sure how I could do that again," continued Jasper. "Not think about it, that is. I think I've figured it out for the most part. Your scent doesn't seem to bother me as much anymore, except for the other night. I wasn't prepared….your blood is so much more potent outside your body, of course. And before that….I thought I would be better to be safe and keep distance from you."

I nodded. "Seems fair," I laughed. "I was just wondering." Then I grinned. "This was nice."

"What?" asked Jasper.

"Talking," I said simply. "I've never really had a one on one conversation with you, Jasper Hale. And even though I've always considered you to be like a brother, like Emmett, I just haven't been as close to you…" I trailed off. Jasper was staring at me. "What?" I asked, embarrassed at his piercing gaze.

"Brother?" He asked, grinning. "You really consider me a brother?"

"Yes," I said, blushing. "Of course. I'm just as close to your family as I am to my own. It just….makes sense."

Jasper laughed. It was a beautiful sound. Unlike Alice's, which was like wind chimes, and Edward's, which was something I couldn't even describe myself. Jasper's was deep and made my face warm.

"Well thank you, Bella. It's nice to know what I am to you." He grinned.

"No problem," I muttered, still embarrassed.

Jasper stood. "I should go," he announced. I stood as well and walked behind him to the door. Then he turned and picked up my hand. "Goodbye, Bella." Then kissed the top of my hand. I blushed like crazy. It was like something out of an old movie.

Then again, I thought, I didn't even know how old Jasper was. For all I knew, he was that character in the old movie, kissing the lady's hand. Maybe that had been his life before this one….

He dropped my hand gently, nodded his head and walked out the door. I watched as he slid into the car gracefully and drove off with a small wave.


As I drove away from Bella's house, I felt many things.

I felt very happy that Bella had forgiven me, and very easily. It was sheer insanity the way she responded to us vampires. But I didn't care.

I also felt resolve from Bella's mentioning that I was like her brother. It was nice, to have a established relationship with her. I had never known what I was to her. She had just been Edward's human girlfriend.

It was bittersweet, though. Just when I'd finally reached some sort of solid ground with her, I would never see her again, because of my brother's idiocy. I felt oddly depressed from this fact.

I now knew that him leaving would do Bella no good. She just felt so much love for him. I think Edward underestimated just how much. This couldn't end well.


How was it? I hope it was original in some ways…I don't want to be totally cliché. :P But please, review and tell me anything. What you liked, what you didn't like and a suggestion to make it better….any ideas you have for the future. I have a pretty set plot, but anything you think would work nicely would be great.

Thanks for reading!

(And if you like Jacob/Bella AT ALL, I have a one-shot for that ship. Again, I'm firmly Team Edward for Bella…which is slightly irrelevant now that Breaking Dawn is out. It's all there is. :D But the story is AU and in New Moon. Check it out! I only have one review for that. L )

The next chapters should be out pretty quickly, since they are done. :D But reviews will speed up the process.