Author Note: Quick one-shot based on this horrible, horrible game with a song (which is quite possibly the most irritating thing ever) that's practically become a cult-icon in the gaming world. For once, its somewhat out of character, but hell… with Kaiba's extreme dedication to games (and to perfection, while I'm at it) I bet even he would snap after hearing the song over and over and over again.


Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh, and I don't own Curse of Monkey island either. The first is property of Kazuki Takahashi and the latter belongs to Lucas Arts.


Plot: Pegasus plays a horrible prank with Kaiba as the victim.


Genre: Humor/General


Rating: K/PG (Parent Guidance Suggested) – for quirky situations.


-Imperfect Paradise (Yamiko)


A Pirate I Was Meant To Be!
by Imperfect Paradise


Trim the Sails and Roam the Sea…


Mokuba rolled his eyes as the elder Kaiba brother continued to play that stupid game he was so sure he would win—hearing the repetitive music issue forth. Just minutes ago, after what seemed like another failed permutation—his brother's max volume-sounding curse word could be heard all over the mansion.

Entering the den where their entertainment system was located, he gazed into the room, and saw his brother staring, unblinkingly at the screen of his computer, unchanged from his previous position in which he saw him about three hours ago, when he wanted to watch the imported show Heros while his brother attempted what everyone now deemed impossible.

"Nii-sama…" he groaned, "How about you call it quits for today? You can do this tomorrow after your meeting…"

Laughing in a way that actually kind of frightened Mokuba, Seto Kaiba turned to him, with an eerie smile on his face, his left eye (both that and the right accompanied by black circles indicating four days without sleep) twitching somewhat, "But Mokuba," he insisted, strained and something of a wisp in his voice, "If I win this… I won't have to negotiate with Industrial Illusions EVER again! We won't have to worry about liability and shared grosses anymore! Duel Monsters will ours- you hear that, Moki…? Ours!" He then let out a capricious sounding laugh, that seemed like it was either meant to reassure himself, or was just supposed to be diabolical to some extent, to which Mokuba would never know.

After regarding and acknowledging that the indications that his brother was now of poor mental health, Kaiba's younger brother put both his hands out in front of him, hesitantly, and slowly made his way back towards the entrance of the room, vacating it as soon as he walked through the door and never came back that night.


Two days in a different time zone, Pegasus J. Crawford came back into his office, looking strained from jet-lag he had to endure previously. Standing besides his desk, Croquet bowed to him and addressed him properly. "Welcome back, sir. How was Domino?"

Pegasus looked at sullenly for a bit, before he began in his usual happy yet cynical voice, "Oh… It was wonderful… A time to remember, actually. Not only did I use up unnecessary company-paid flight miles, but Kaiba-boy never showed up for that god-damn meeting! It was quite gauche and I honestly have no idea what reason he had not to see me."

Croquet snickered quietly to himself (catching Pegasus's humor there instantly) before he spoke, "Anyway, we have some new interns here from San Fran State—would you like to meet them or shall I have Tenma do the briefing."

Pegasus yawned and murmured, "Just gimme a minute..." Pegasus then sat back in his desk, and leaned forward, burying his head in his hands, "Do you have any idea how terrible air-port food is even with first class? Not to mention I'm completely exhausted." It was then when silence took over the room.

Then…

"Hmmm. Croquet?"

"Yes Pegasus-sama?"

"You don't think that that bet I made with him, that if he won that PC that sent I him he could get the rights to my company is the cause for all this—"

Croquet shook his head and murmured, "My kids played that same game two years ago, and it took them two full days to figure it out and move on to the next part. And even after you tampered with it in the first place by removing that "Scurvy/Orange" option, there is absolutely no way Mr. Kaiba would continue without questioning the game itself." (A/N 1)

Pegasus looked up at the ceiling thoughtfully, then added thoughtfully, "Yeah… I bet he's given up by now. Even he's smart enough to realize that's something's obvious wrong with the programming of that game. He must still be upset. Pity, even Kaiba-boy can't appreciate the subtle humor of a typical prank."


Two hours later, back in Japan—Mokuba, the maid and a few servants stared in horror as the master of Kaiba mansion laughing madly while chanting the horrid tune (having now embedded itself in Kaiba's memory forever) beating his computer with a sledge-hammer (god only knows where he got that) along with the Lucas Arts copyrighted CD-Rom, which still inserted in the computer's drive. But for some odd reason, even though the screen was cracked, the keys either all over the place or falling off, with charges surrounding the overworked piece of multimedia, the chanting of the pirates still repeated again…

And again…

…And again.


-THE END-


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Author Note 1: In the Curse of Monkey Island, the objective in one segment of the game is to say certain phrases a precise order with the NPC(non-player-characters)'s taking the phrases, then rhyming and twisting them into a repetitive song, which eventually ends the with the option, "We'll surely avoid Scurvy if we all eat an orange." Said phrase which Pegasus removed from the game in this story, which pretty much means it will go on forever and ever. This is actually based on reports that some of the games didn't have that specific selection, indicating a glitch in the disc programming.


Random Note: Enjoy my craptastic one-shot. (if some people didn't get, I recommending searching for it on YouTube to get a taste of what this song is really like). I hope if there's a gamer in the house, that he or she got it and enjoyed it to some extent.