AN: This was fun to write hope you enjoy. It's a joke people i love twilight so don't take it too seriously. I may write a few others depending on how people take to this one

"Goodbye Bella" he said in that same peaceful voice.

Bella sadly and pathetically reached out for him which if anyone was watching would either find heart wrenching, amusing or just plain embarrassing. Edward removed her from his person the same way a person removes a leach- with an expression of pure disgust.

"Take care of yourself" he said half-heartedly.

Then poof he was gone to the envy of all magic acts which had no hope to achieve such a convincing vanishing trick.

Bella collapsed to the forest floor killing an innocent worm who's wife and family will miss him dearly.

R.I.P Mr. Worm you shall forever be remembered...

A moment of silence please...

Darn it Bella stop sobbing! It's disrespectful.

Bella was sobbing her ickle heart out curled up in a ball of pure agony.

Only a few minutes had passed since Edward's disappearance when suddenly Bella heard a noise.

Edward traipsed through the clearing ignoring Bella on the floor. Bella sieved his ankle.

"Edward you came back for me! I knew you still loved me" she cried happily.

Edward looked down at her slightly confused. Like he wasn't completely sure how she'd ended up there. He jerked his leg as if trying to get rid of a small yappy dog that had latched on to him.

"No Bella my internal Sat Nav simply sent me in the wrong direction" he said finally throwing her off.

Bella stared up at him completely distraught.

"No! Don't leave me!" she sobbed crawling after him as he calmly walked away looking bored.

Then before Bella could jump him he once again vanished.


Leaving Bella to all the emo joy she could ever wish for.

A few minutes later Charlie looked up from the game he was watching to see Edward Cullen tapping on his window.

Charlie reluctantly got up and opened the window.

"Hello Edward what are you doing here I thought you were with Bella" he grumbled.

"No I left her crying on the forest floor, I just though you should know, By the way could you point me in the right direction of my house?" said Edward looking dazzlingly confused.

"That's nice of you to tell me, you live that way" said Charlie pointing a finger in some direction.

"Thanks" said Edward with a grin.

"Hey kid why don't you come in and watch the game with me?" said Charlie.

"Ok what about Bella?" asked Edward not concerned but thought it would only be polite to remind Charlie who's memory may not be what it once was.

"Oh, don't worry I'll get those La Push kids to find her after the game she'll be alright" said Charlie dismissively.

"I'll just go round to the door" said Edward.

"Why bother what are windows good for?" said Charlie sitting back down on the sofa.

Edward shrugged and climbed through the window to join Charlie on the sofa where they both enjoyed the game.

The End

AN: Giggles.. sowi.