Five Times Derek Lied

By Sister Rose

Fandom: Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles

Lie No. 1: You're prettier than your picture.

Truth: Sarah Connor was prettier in the picture. The photo showed a pre-Judgment Day woman with soft curls and gentle ruffles. The woman he was supposed to be protecting was tough and muscled, in little need of protection. She was attractive, sure, and he was glad that she seemed capable of protecting her son. Not that it mattered.

In jail, hands shackled, knowing the T-888 would have him in a matter of days if not hours, knowing he had failed his mission once more, knowing that with Kyle gone, no one would remember the oldest Reese boy had ever lived, Derek just wanted to say something – anything – that might make someone remember him.

Not that the great Sarah Connor would remember a failed resistance fighter for more than five minutes, but Derek liked knowing that for a few seconds, at least, he had made an impression.

Lie No. 2: I won't be the bastard who brings metal down on the Connors.

Truth: Derek doesn't just hate Cameron – and let's not even talk about how much he hates the fact that they've given the machine a name – he loathes her. He despises her. He fears her.

He fears everything about her: her merciless eyes, her pitiless drive, her unending quest – her powerful fingers that forced screaming ululations from his wracking body in time to crescendoing piano music.

Every time Derek sees Cameron, he remembers – he already has brought metal down on John Connor. Just luck that Connor happened not to be in the bunker the day Derek did it.

Lie No. 3: Sayles – I loved the guy, but he was an idiot.

Truth: Sayles was just like the rest of them who went backward in time, Derek included. There had been four of them – four chances to stop Judgment Day. Four of them – four times as many chances to fail.

Now it was down to Derek – just the one chance.

It was just luck that Derek hadn't been the one following up the Barbara lead. Sayles had gotten caught failing. Derek just hadn't failed spectacularly enough yet. Every time he looks at Sarah Connor, he sees his own failure looking back at him.

Lie No. 4: I celebrated your 30th birthday with you. You got drunk.

Truth: Derek had been in the same room as the great John Connor and 200 other people when Connor celebrated his 30th birthday, but Derek wasn't part of the group celebrating Connor's birthday. Derek was just a lieutenant leading a small platoon, and not even doing that very well. Connor didn't know him – certainly not well enough to get drunk with him.

Kyle – Connor might have gotten drunk with Kyle. But the young John Connor – the one Derek was living with now – the young John Connor didn't have Kyle, and so Derek lied and said they were friends.

Not so far off, really. Derek liked this John Connor.

Lie No. 5: Your mom is just Kyle's type.

Truth: Their mom had been a tiny tyrant in their house, a dark-haired, magnolia-scented Southern belle transported to California for the purpose of running their dad's life. She would sweetly suggest that the trash was getting a little full and would Dad mind just taking that on out?

And he would laugh and call her the iron fist in the velvet glove and then take the trash out.

Sarah Connor stalks purposefully through the house and barks orders at him, running all of their lives with the same kind of purpose if not the same style.

It's true that Sarah Connor was Kyle's type. But she's Derek's type as well. Of all the lies, that's the one he most hopes no one ever finds out.