Axel stood quietly in line. He didn't want to attend church (or confess, nonetheless) but apparently Xemnas had heard that "people with hearts" went to church. Currently, the Organization was "Catholic", as they switched religions every few weeks. It gave them "diversity of religion", Xemnas had said.
Axel scooted towards the confession stand, awaiting his God-forsaken turn. Thinking of something to confess was his biggest problem. He had already admitted that he was the one to give Demyx the awful haircut during some hard partying, and that he snuck into Saix's room to steal a peek at his "Superior" boxers. There was only so much havoc that the Flurry of Dancing Flames could wreak at a time, though remembering was probably the biggest road block.
As pyromaniac slipped inside, he decided to play a little trick. Hey, at least it would give him something worth confessing.
After the average greeting from Xemnas, who had decided that he would be the all-powerful priest until he became bored and forced the job on Zexion (who had actually wanted it), Axel started spouting his "confessions".
"Okay, let's see. I'm pretty sure that I stole at least a dozen of Xigbar's salted peanuts at the carnival last week, and I'll keep out the details of me putting the blame on Demyx. The other day, I decided that the world could live with one less pigeon and shot it. I'm not too sure that it lived through that, either. Hm, let me think. Oh! Yes, it was really fun to let the petting-zoo animals. You know, going to 'heart-full' events gives me a bunch to do wrong… But I don't really regret stealing some farmer's cow. Or the flaming-drapery-thrown-out-of-a-window ordeal." Axel continued on with unthinkable confessions, with everything from emptying the Organization's swimming pool to attempting to feed Zexion to some lions.
He could only imagine the look on Xemnas' face.
After finishing off the many confessions with letting "actually feeling sorry" for letting Demyx ride the dolphins and land himself in the hospital, the red-head exited the small room swiftly. Before zipping back in line.
"Axel? Again?! I thought you were done! Jesus, there's NO WAY you're going anywhere but Hell!" The smirk on Axel's face stretched from ear to ear as Xemnas flipped out.
"Actually, Superior-Priest Xemnas, I was back here for only one more confession. I lied about the confessions. I don't think I did a single one of them." The silence that filled the room was to the point of being unbearable and ear-splitting. "Well, except the cow. I still have that in my room. And the burning of a drapery. That really happened, too."