Time for some radomness, whackiness, and fun. :)
WWE Silly Style
Mr. McMahon clapped his hands together. He was so excited! This was his best idea yet. He was having a sleep over! He looked at the faces around the room: The Undertaker, Edge, MVP, Cena, Triple H, Carlito, Beth Phoenix, Shawn Michaels and Santino Marella, and Hulk Hogan were all there. No one was quite sure why the Hulkster had shown up, after all he wasn't invited.
"What should we do first?" McMahon asked excitedly. He had never had a slumber party before not even as a little kid because no one had liked him. But now that he was all grown up things had changed so much…wait…well…not exactly…
"What should we do?" He asked the superstars.
"Well…we could…" Shawn Michael's tried to think.
"Paint our fingernails!" Cena shouted excitedly and pulled out a bottle of nail polish from his pocket. The other superstars turned to look at him.
"Me first!" MVP shrieked.
"No, me first!" Triple H pushed him out of the way and then they both started to squabble. Meanwhile Cena turned to Hulkster and started to paint his fingernails hot pink.
Some of the wrestlers lined up to get their nails painted by John Cena. Meanwhile Beth Phoenix and Santino Marella snuck away to a closet. They sat in the dark holding hands.
"Are you going to kiss me?"
"Where's-a your lips?"
"Below my nose!" Beth giggled. "Silly."
"Mmmm…your-a lips-a taste like moldy feet!"
"You're kissing a shoe!"
Shawn Michael's looked down and regarded his neon pink nails proudly.
"I'm just a sexy boy, I'm not your boy toy!" He sang while he admired Cena's artwork.
"Carlito thinks they're sooo pink and sooo pretty!" Carlito studied Shawn's fingernails and then took his hand and sniffed the tips of his fingers.
"What are you doing?"
Shawn tried to pull his hand away but Carlito licked his fingers.
"Doesn't taste like apples, not cool. I spit in the face of people who don't wanna be cool!" Carlito dug around in his pants. "Here we go—no—that's not Carlito's apple…here it is!" Carlito pulled a piece of fruit from his pants but it wasn't an apple. He looked down at the watermelon in his hands. Shawn gazed at him with a look of amazement.
"How did you…in your…what?"
Carlito shrugged and took a big bite of the melon and then spit it at Shawn.
Vince McMahon decided it was time to really juice up his party.
"I have pizza rolls!" He brought them in and the hungry superstars crowded around.
"I hate pizza!" Cena pouted.
"Does it have cheese?" Triple H asked.
"Of course, it's pizza!" Vince said taking a pizza roll and stuffing it in his mouth.
"Cheese smells like feet and I'm allergic to feet." Triple H announced.
"Dude…you have feet…" Hulkster pointed down at Triple H's feet. Triple H looked down and his mouth fell into a surprised O.
"Oh my God, I'm breaking out! It itches! I can't breathe!" Triple H started to scratch at his skin and gasp for air.
"Who in the hell is allergic to feet?" Vince asked raising an eyebrow.
"Mm…pizza roll…Carlito likes pizza roll." Carlito grabbed a few pizza rolls and shoved them down his pants.
"I'm just a sexy boy!" Shawn sang and danced around with the plate of pizza rolls.
The Undertaker sat in a corner watching everyone else intently. They were acting really weird. He had his hands stuffed in the pockets of his coat but he removed one slowly and peered down at it and wrinkled his nose. Cena had painted the fingernails of his right hand pink. The Undertaker scowled at his defiled hand and stuck it back into his pocket. He looked up to see Carlito standing over him. Carlito reached his hand deep into his pants.
"No, that's no pizza roll…ah." Carlito pulled out a pizza roll and stuck it in The Undertaker's face. "Pizza roll?"
Undertaker just grimaced at Carlito as his reply.
"Not cool. I spit in the face of those who don't want to be cool!"
Undertaker got to his feet slowly. He loomed over Carlito and rolled his eyes back and drew his thumb (of his left hand which was not contaminated with pink nail polish) across his throat in a slashing method.
"But for you, Carlito makes an exception!" Carlito stuffed the pizza roll into his mouth and turned to the nearest person and spit on them.
Edge (who had been spit on) glared at Carlito and said with a snarl:
"I hate pepperoni!"
Beth and Santino were still hiding out in the closet. Santino was curled up whimpering. Beth reached for him but ended up hugging a raincoat.
"Where are you, don't cry 'Tino…" Beth reached for him again but this time her arms wrapped around a blow up doll. "Why would Vince keep a blow-up of Cena in his closet?"
She was greeted with a sob from Santino. Beth tossed the blow-up Cena aside.
"Santino what's wrong?"
"I'm afraid of the dark, and-a it's really a-dark in here!"
"Oh, well that's okay. I have electric boobs."
Santino hushed and sniffled. Suddenly there were two glowing orbs before his eyes.
"Oooh…let there-a be light!"
The un-closeted people were wandering around Vince's living room. Vince was so excited about this slumber party. Everyone seemed to be having a lot of fun except for The Undertaker who was sitting in a dark corner all by himself. Vince walked over to the Deadman.
"Join in the fun!"
The Undertaker looked up at Vince.
"This is stupid."
"It is not, it's my party and it's not!" Vince stomped his foot and started to cry.
"You make Vince cry! Not cool!" Carlito pulled a severed hand from his pants. "I spit in the face of those who are not cool!"
"What the hell?" Vince paled at the severed hand that Carlito was bringing to meet his lips. Carlito bit a chunk from the hand and then turned to The Undertaker, but thought better of it, so he turned to Vince, thought better again, and then turned to Triple H and spat flesh at him. Triple H looked really funny he was all covered in lotion to stop him from itching (since he was allergic to feet and just happened to have two of them).
"What did you just spit on me you ass hole!"
Carlito looked at him innocently.
"I don't know, I found it in my pants, tastes like underwear…"
"Well the only thing that tastes like underwear…" Triple H stopped for a moment thinking. "The only thing that tastes like underwear…"
"I want to taste underwear!" Edge said sticking his nose into the conversation. The others turned to him with strange looks and he turned bright red. "What, I mean, GIRL underwear of course, duh!"
The guys let out some pent up sighs and nodded agreeing with Edge that there is nothing wrong with girl underwear of course.
"I have on girl underwear right now!" Vince blurted out, and then promptly left the group.
Later Chris Jericho came up with the idea to play hide and seek. Everyone scattered to leave Hulk Hogan to search for them. Jericho and Edge walked down Vince's hallways skipping and holding hands.
"I never thought we'd get away from them!" Jericho said.
"I can't wait to touch them, they're so round!" Edge squealed excitedly.
"I know, I keep them perfect, just incase I ever want to take them out and play with them."
"Wow, you mean you can play with them by yourself?" Edge asked in disbelief.
"Duh, you didn't know that? I mean it is a lot more fun with two people though."
Jericho and Edge continued skipping down the hallway and then stopped at a closet. They pulled the door opened and Beth Phoenix gasped. Santino touched her boob and then got zapped with a small electrical current.
"You idiots!" Beth grabbed the door and slammed it angrily.
"What was that?" Edge turned to Jericho.
"Alien spaceships!" Jericho hissed and dragged a confused Edge down the hallway.
Hulk went around Vince's house searching for hidden superstars. He first found Carlito hiding behind some curtains. Carlito reached into his pants to pull something out but Hogan ran away before he could be spit at.
It didn't take him long to find The Undertaker. He hadn't moved from his corner and just sat there plain and out in the open. Hulk went on to find everyone else, even Beth and Santino who had disappeared earlier without much notice from everyone else. Beth again slammed the door angrily and Hogan wondered why she had boobs that could shoot lightening. He wondered to himself if he could shoot lightening with any body parts.
"Wait a minute…where's Jericho and Edge?" Vince asked looking around at his superstars. He either didn't notice or didn't care that Beth and Santino were still missing. Just as he said this Edge and Jericho appeared. Jericho's hair was messed up and Edge's shirt was torn. The rest of the wrestlers regarded them with odd expressions.
"What?" asked Edge.
"What were you two doing?" Shawn Michael's asked.
"We were in the closet." Jericho said as though it were not the least bit odd.
"Doing what?" Vince barked.
"Hey, if they were in the closet, and now they're not, then that means they came out of the closet!" Triple H clapped his hands together happily laughing.
"No we didn't! I mean did, come out, but we're not gay!" Jericho grumbled. He looked over at Edge who was a deep shade of crimson. Jericho corrected himself. "I'm not gay."
"You never answered, what were you doing?"
"Chris has these cool little balls!" Edge hopped up and down full of excitement.
"We got into a fight over our game…because Edge said it was too hard." Chris looked around at the awkward looks on all the faces. "What, we played marbles." Chris held up a bag of shiny little glass balls.
"I love marbles!" Cena shouted. "Let's play!"
The Undertaker sat in his corner watching everyone play marbles. He really wanted to play but he was scared that people would discover his secret. He adjusted his hat to make sure his secret was safe and hidden away beneath it.
"It's really late…" Triple H looked at his Mickey-Mouse watch. "It's like nine-thirty! It's waaay past my bed time!" He stretched and yawned.
"You're such a baby…I'm staying up until ten!" Cena puffed up proudly at his declaration.
"Not me, I'm worn out from hide and seek." Hogan said as he grabbed a pillow from McMahon's couch and curled up with it.
It seemed everyone was sleepy (except Cena who insisted he was staying up until ten) so Vince got out sleeping bags. When he opened the hall closet Glamarella fell out. Everyone sat silently watching Beth Phoenix's boobs blink different colors.
"Pretty lights…" Carlito cooed.
"Awesome, it's like that game Simon!" Cena bounded across the room to Beth who was trying to find her shirt. "I want to play!" Cena poked Beth's electric boobs and got zapped. "Damn, I'm so turned on!"
Beth snarled at him and pulled her shirt on.
"Hey-a you, you-a touch my girl!"
"Well you don't have no cool electrical body parts, so why would I touch you!" Cena shoved Santino who slumped defeated.
"Chris's marbles glow in the dark!" Edge announced. Everyone looked at him oddly. "No, I mean his marbles!" Edge clarified holding up the bag of marbles they had all played with earlier.
"Stop talking about my marbles!" Jericho chastised. Suddenly MVP came stomping into the room angrily. He crossed his arms over his chest.
"Hide and seek huh? Well I'm leaving!"
"What wrong?" Vince put a hand on MVP's shoulder.
"It's just like when I was a kid, nobody found me!" MVP ran out of the room in tears.
Everyone snuggled in to their sleeping bags ready to go to dreamland. The Undertaker looked around the room, and once he was sure everyone was asleep he took off his hat. Under the hat was a dolly with a little purple dress and blonde curls. He held it to his chest and sighed happily comforted by its presence.
Hope I got a few laughs out of this! I had fun writing it. :) Please review fwiends!