Make A Decision
A/N- ONESHOT! So this takes place in season 2 sometime after Dangerous Liaisons and before Rebecca moves in with Junior. It isn't actually a scene that ever took place, but instead my way of explaining why I think Kris acted in certain ways and made certain decisions (without giving too much away before you read it lol!) Please, please, please let me know what you all think and leave a review! Thanks so much you guys ROCK!
She sat silently on the barstool, gently twirling her legs back and forth in rhythm to the music. Her drink sat in front of her untouched and abandoned, the straw gently bobbing in the liquid coolness. She was surrounded by people and yet she seemed distanced and alone. Her hair had cascaded down over her eye, blocking the view of her face making her seem unapproachable yet irresistible all at the same time.
She reached out and her fingers gently played with the tip of the straw, gently twisting it back and forth between her fingers. She picked up her phone, checking the time, before setting it back down. She looked frustrated to say the least, and he thought he also saw remnants of anger on her face.
"Hey," he stated loud enough she could hear him over the music.
"Hey back," Kris replied a small smile grazing her face as their eyes met.
"I thought you had training tomorrow?" Junior asked plopping down on the stool next to her.
"I do but I told Kerry I would meet him here to discuss some things, looks like he couldn't make it since he is over an hour late already."
"Ah and the shadow returns," Junior stated teasingly.
"That is if he ever decides to show up," Kris stated as her frustration shined through.
Junior looked at her for a moment and silently nodded his head. "Kris," Junior stated softly before she interrupted.
"How goes things with you and Rebecca?" Kris asked slowly, making it sound forced.
Their eyes met once again and locked.
"I thought we said we weren't going to discuss this, Kris."
"Right," Kris stated softly reaching out and once again playing with her straw. "Looks like it's a busy night, I can let you get back to work."
A small sigh escaped Junior's lips and he silently shook his head for a moment.
"Have a goodnight," Kris stated as she picked up her purse and hopped off the stool making her way quickly through the crowd and out the exit door.
"Goodnight," Junior stated softly to the empty chair in front of him.
He made his way quickly behind the bar, checking the stock and making sure that everything was running smoothly.
"That looked like an interesting conversation," Rebecca stated as she nodded her head towards the place where the two had just been sitting.
"Everything is fine," Junior replied smiling softly before leaning in and placing a gentle kiss on her lips.
"Fine," Rebecca stated softly and teasingly.
"Everything here is going smoothly so I think I am going to head back early, see you later?" Junior asked.
"Sure thing boss," Rebecca teased gently waving her hand over her shoulder as she made her way back out into the throng of people to deliver drinks.
Junior sat in his convertible and gently laid his head back against the headrest, taking a moment to look up at the stars. A soft sigh escaped his lips as he replayed the conversation between him and Dani just a few days before.
"She is a nice girl but do you think she can make you forget about Kris?" Dani asked softly as she patted her brother on the shoulder.
"No," Junior whispered softly to himself "she can't, as much as I want her to she can't."
He gently ran his hand through his hair and rubbed his temples before starting his car.
"You're back early." Matt stated as Kris made her way towards Wildfires' stall.
"Matt you scared me," Kris stated laughing slightly and holding her hand to her chest.
"Well, how is the illustrious Kerry?" Matt asked smiling softly as he threw a towel softly at Kris.
"I'm not quite sure," Kris replied softly, throwing the towel against one of the stall doors before setting down on a bale of hay.
"Bad night?" Matt asked plopping down next to her.
"Kerry was a no show," Kris stated softly "and to top the night off I kind of got into it with Junior."
"That doesn't sound like much fun." Matt stated as he gently wrapped his arm around her and pulled her into him.
"It wasn't," Kris responded "I would have much rather stayed here and mucked stalls with you."
"Mucking stalls wow." Matt stated teasingly "You really did have a bad night."
"I thought he was supposed to be there for me, you know." Kris replied.
"Are we talking about Kerry or Junior here, Kris?" Matt asked his voice soft as he spoke.
"Maybe both?" Kris replied unsure of the answer herself.
"Kris," Matt stated softly "you can't have it both ways, you know that from experience." A soft hurt smile fluttered onto his face for a moment before it disappeared. "At some point you are going to have to make a decision."
"It's not that easy Matt," Kris stated looking into his eyes for a moment. "I'm sorry I hurt you," she stated softly.
"I know that you didn't mean to," Matt responded pulling her into a gentle hug. "Now tell me, what did you and Junior get into it about?"
"I asked about Rebecca," Kris stated, her voice soft and childlike as she spoke.
Matt leaned back on the bench pulling her with him. "I could see how that wouldn't go over well," he stated.
"Tell me something Kris," Matt asked softly "and be honest."
"Of course," Kris answered leaning her head onto his shoulder.
"What happened that night you were on the ranch by yourself? I'm not trying to prod but things have just been really strained since then."
A soft sigh escaped Kris' lips and she looked into his eyes for just a moment before looking away. "I really don't think you want to know." Kris replied honestly.
"Gotcha," Matt stated quietly looking away to try and hide the hurt that was now present on his face.
"It was a mistake," Kris stated "a moment of weakness and it shouldn't have happened."
"Kris," Matt stated after sitting for a moment quietly "I really don't think I can hear about this."
"I understand," Kris stated quietly and she was interrupted by her phone ringing.
"It's Kerry," Kris stated her eyes meeting Matt's for a moment.
"Are you going to answer it?" He asked softly.
"I probably should," Kris stated staring down at the phone in her hand.
"Make a decision," Matt gently prodded.
Kris nodded her head quietly before gently flipping open her phone.
"Hey Kerry," she stated as she nodded in his direction before making her way out of the stalls and towards the mobile home that set on the edge of the road.
"No, I understand but I just wish you would have called." Kris stated as she gently walked down the path slowly kicking up the gravel she came upon.
"Of course I forgive you," she replied turning away from the steps leading up to her home and instead making her way along the short path that she had walked so many times before.
"I miss you too," Kris stated gently closing her eyes for just a moment to block out all other thoughts.
"Goodnight," Kris stated softly clicking her phone closed and gently leaning against the white picket fence bordering the two properties.
"The problem is," Kris whispered silently to herself "I think I may miss him more."
Junior pulled his car into the drive and looked up at the sign leading into Raintree Farms. He sat for a moment and contemplated what he was thinking about doing.
Closing his eyes he pictured the way she looked at him, the way she kissed him that night in the trailer, and the way they had made love. He closed his eyes and his heart filled with the hurt that had come the morning after. Could he really do this to himself?
Letting a gentle sigh escape his lips he gently pounded his fist on the steering wheel trying to build up the courage after the fiasco at the club. He could feel his heart pounding in his chest, signifying that he was even more nervous than he thought.
He closed his eyes and tried for a moment to picture his life without Kris and was startled away from the images by the ringing of his phone.
"Hello," Junior stated into the phone momentarily looking at the caller ID as he answered.
"Hey man it's Matt," his friend replied "are you going to drive in or are you just going to sit in our driveway all night?"
A gentle laugh escaped Junior's lips as he contemplated his friend's question.
"That is the question of the day," Junior replied, "and anyway how did you know I was in the driveway or even that it was me?"
"I can see your headlights, man." Matt stated laughing as he spoke, "And I knew it was most likely you because Kris and I had a talk…. and I really shouldn't be talking to you about this should I?" Matt stated as the realization came to him.
"You and Kris were talking about me?" Junior asked the thought sparking a bit of hope inside of him.
"Just about different things," Matt stated trying to sound casual.
"You are a bad liar Matt," Junior stated smiling softly into his phone as he spoke.
"I am going to give you some advice," Matt stated.
"And that would be?" Junior asked somewhat amused at the direction the conversation was going.
"Make a decision man." Matt stated.
"What do you mean?" Junior asked.
"Either put that car into drive and come down here and talk to her, or let it go. I know that you have Rebecca on the side, whatever that may mean, and knowing you I have an idea. But you need to make a decision. You can't have it both ways, Junior and neither can she."
"She hurt me Matt, more than you probably realize."
"And you don't think you hurt her?" Matt replied "Pablo found her crying Junior, crying behind a haystack. I don't know about you, but that doesn't sound like the Kris I know."
"It's complicated Matt," Junior sighed "you just don't understand."
"No Junior, you don't understand." Matt stated "As much as it kills me, I see the way she looks at you, the way she talks about you and the way you look at her and talk about her. You have one chance Junior and that is it. Eventually someone is going to come along and sweep her off her feet and she is going to be gone. Think about that."
"Make a decision," Matt stated. The next thing Junior heard was the gentle sound of a dial tone.
Kris stood silently staring up at the stars as she leaned against the white fence. She tried to picture a few of the constellations but her heart and mind just weren't into it and she gave up quickly resigning her brain to her thoughts.
Ever since the night that she and Junior had hooked up in her trailer she couldn't seem to get her mind off of him and off of what she had said to him.
"I'm sorry we shouldn't have done this, it was a mistake." Kris stated as she slipped her pants on quickly turning away from the disappointed look on his face.
She gently ran her hand along her hair and pulled out the tight ponytail, letting her hair fall softly on her shoulders. Running her hands through it she could feel the tension slowly leaving her head.
She looked up at the stars again and was mesmerized by the way they seemed to glow so brightly out in the country. Back where she had lived before, the only lights she really saw were those of the bowling alley by her and her mother's apartment.
She remembered the night they had camped out while searching for Wildfire, and she and Junior had sat side by side underneath the very same stars. 'But oh how things have changed,' her brain spoke to her.
Kris was startled out of her thoughts by the sound of a car engine and then a horn gently pulling up behind her, causing her to turn.
"Hey," She stated softly looking at the man sitting in the car. "How did you know I would be here?"
"Please," he scoffed teasingly "I know where to find you if I need you."
She raised her eyebrows, somewhat surprised by his teasing manner before she responded. "I guess that is good to know."
The man hopped out of his car and made his way to the fence leaning against the opposite side and turning his head to look at her.
"I think we should talk." Junior stated softly almost tenderly.
"I'm OK Junior," Kris stated defensively "you don't have to be protective of me. I can handle the fact that you have a new girlfriend."
"Kris," Junior stated "Please don't do this."
"Do what?" Kris asked accusingly "You're the one who went out and got a new girlfriend, you sure moved on awful fast."
"Look," Junior stated turning around and gently grabbing her arm turning her to look at him as well "I came over to apologize. I was kind of harsh in the club and I felt bad."
"I probably shouldn't have asked," Kris admitted softly.
"Do you ever think about that night?" Junior asked his eyes meeting Kris' as he spoke.
A gentle blush fell over her cheeks and she turned her head slightly to try and hide it.
"Sometimes, yeah I do." Kris replied her eyes once again meeting hers. "But, no regrets, right?"
"You wouldn't change anything that happened?" Junior asked questioningly.
"Junior I can't do this again, I can't go down this road again."
"Kris you looked me in the eyes and told me that you just wanted to be friends again and then all this happened. What was I supposed to think?"
A soft sigh escaped Kris' lips and she gently ran her hands up to her temples pressing on the soft fleshy spot.
"Junior, it was a mistake a lapse in judgment. I'm sorry. I'm just sorry."
"As much as you want to believe that and you want me to believe that, we both know it isn't true."
His hand was on her arm again gently pulling her towards him.
"What about Rebecca?" Kris asked her face inches from his. She could feel his warm breath on her cheek causing her heart to flutter, and she waited for his response.
"I'll tell her tomorrow." Junior stated smiling softly at her.
Their lips met for a moment causing both hearts to soar. Junior deepened the kiss pulling her into him for a moment and she wrapped her hand around his head pulling him closer.
The kiss was over quickly as Kris gently pulled away only moments later.
"Kris?" Junior asked softly.
"I need some time Junior." Kris stated as she stared at the ground. "I need more time."
"Why?" Junior asked softly his hand reaching out once again for her.
"Because you really hurt me Junior," Kris stated her voice breaking slightly as she spoke.
"I know," Junior replied softly "I made a mistake in trusting my dad and Tina and I betrayed your family. I don't know how many more times I can tell you that I am sorry. I don't know what I can do to prove to you that you can trust me again."
"Just give me time," Kris stated her eyes meeting his once more. "Please, Junior. All I need is a little time."
Junior silently nodded his head as he turned and looked off in the distance, his heart silently breaking.
Kris leaned against the fence for a moment, trying to catch her breath. She was startled out of her thoughts for the second time that night by the sound of a car horn and two dim headlamps.
"Well there you are," the man called out as he put his car into park and hopped out.
"Hey Kerry," Kris stated gently pushing herself off of the fence and walking the short distance towards him.
"I wasn't interrupting something was I?" Kerry asked.
"No not at all," Kris stated turning quickly to look back at Junior who still stood staring off in the opposite direction.
"Are you done here?" Kerry asked pointing in the direction of Junior "Because I was going to talk to you about a few business things and since it looks like you walked out I could just give you a ride back."
"That would be fine," Kris stated turning once again to look at Junior who had now turned to look at her.
"Great, great." Kerry stated excitedly as he made his way closer to Kris and quickly led her to the passenger's door. As he opened her door for her, Kris' eyes met Junior's once more. The hurt and disappointment present on his face caused her to pause for a moment, before sliding into the car.
She closed her eyes tightly, trying to get the image out of her brain, only causing it to ingrain more.
She hears Kerry call to Junior to have a great night and hears his soft reply of "yup." She can feel when he has gotten in the car and only after it has started and began to move that she again tempts to open her eyes.
She looks at Kerry sitting next to her in the car and gently turns her head away, looking out the window.
"You ok?" He asks quietly "I interrupted something didn't I?"
"No, I'm fine." Kris states softly trying to keep her voice from breaking "I'm just a little hungry."
"I know just the spot," Kerry responded smiling softly over at her.
"Are you sure your ok?" he asked again "We can always do this another night."
"I'm fine," Kris stated turning and looking at him and putting on a fake smile. Matt's words echoed in her head as they made the way gently down the curving road.
'Make a decision, Kris.'
'You can't have it both ways, make a decision.'
She looks in the rearview mirror one last time and sees Junior still gently leaning against the fence. Turning her eyes away from the mirror and looking out the side window she tries to keep the tears from flowing.
"I made a decision," she whispered softly to herself "to protect my heart."