First off, thanks to R and superbanana, who were my very first reviewers! And of course, eternal thanks to Auri, as always, for being so incredibly awesome.

And now, the legal bit:

I don't own, Terry does. I just fangirl (and cosplay!)


Susan blanched. "Sod it," she muttered. "Not –here-…"

"Let me guess….'someone' has showed up?" Cheri asked.

"I ought to leave." Susan tried to rise.

"Stay," Angua said, placing a firm hand on Susan's shoulder. "What's the worst that can happen?"

Susan snorted, but stayed where she was, wishing she had a weapon of some sort with which to bash his brains in. "Let me have your truncheon, Angua."


"Call it an insurance policy."

"Mister Vimes'd go spare if she did," Cheri pointed out. "Well, unless she had a good reason."

"If he comes over here, I will have a bloody good reason."

"We'll see if he actually does," Angua said, trying to calm Susan down. Ironic, it was, only two days from That Time of the Month, and yet here she was, restraining someone else, telling –them- to calm down.

"I wish I'd brought the poker," Susan muttered.


"Where do you think you're going, sunshine?" Vegnencia asked as Teatime stood.

"Over there."

Vegnencia glanced where he was pointing to. "First off, don't point. It attracts attention. Secondly, I presume the girl over there with the murderous scowl is your Miss Susan?"

Teatime nodded. His Susan…yes, he liked the sound of that.

"You don't just go over there, bold as brass. There's a …wossname…etiquette to this sort of thing. What you do not do is stride over there. That's asking to get injured, and knowing the company she's keeping at the moment, you might wind up with some very painful injuries indeed. Most likely, in fact, considering the time of the month. What you –do- do, Sonny Jim, is go over to Igor at the bar, slip him a bob, and ask him to send a drink over to your lady there, with your compliments. Then you get me 

another beer and come and sit back down. Then it's up to her to make the next move. 'S how things are done."

"Why do I get you another beer? Is that part of the etiquette?"

"You get me another pint because I sodding well need one. Now go." He stood there. "Go!"

Still slightly confused, Teatime did as he was told, then returned to the table with Vegnencia's beer.

"Now what?"

"You wait."


Susan looked surprised when Igor came over to the table, carrying a drink. "Since when are you a waiter, Igor?"

"The bloke over there wiv th' funny eye asked me t' bring this ter you, wiv his compliments," Igor said, setting it down on the table.

Susan groaned. "Thank you, Igor." As the barman shuffled back off to the counter, Susan put her head in her hands. "I'm going to kill him…again."

"It's rather sweet, actually," Cheri ventured. "Sending you a drink. Most men wouldn't do that."

"Especially not here," Angua added.

Susan's glare could've stripped paint off of walls two miles away. "He is not being…eurgh…sweet. What he is being is a bloody nuisance. The words sweet, and –him- do not go together in any sentence unless preceded by a negative. Ever." She was still deciding what to do when Schlimazel's voice broke through the mostly-quiet atmosphere of the bar, as the very-drunk boogeyman began to sing.

"When yer driving through the moonlight onna highway, when yer driving through the moonlight ter a dance…"

Susan stood up. "Sod this." Taking the drink with her, she strode over to the table where he was sitting.


Teatime hadn't expected her to come over, but he wasn't displeased that she did. He grinned. "Hello, Susan. You got the drink I sent you?"

"Oh, yes," Susan said, grinning. Teatime smiled even wider. This was a good sign. And then she upended the drink all over his lap, and just as purposefully as she had strode over there, strode out of the bar.

"Was she supposed to do that?" Teatime asked.


Also, if you can name the song Schlimazel started singing, I will be very impressed (and quite pleased).

I know this chapter may seem a titch on the short side, but my roommates agreed this was a good place to leave off, and also, I' m of two minds on the beginning of the next chapter, and as I will have exactly no time whatsoever until the 24th, at the very earliest….I thought I'd save you guys my indecision, at least for a while.