Animated; set after "A bridge too close" – Short drabble about Bumblebee after he discovered Wasp wasn't the traitor expanded into a whole Wasp/Bee
Many thanks to Dendey for beta-reading.
Bumblebee had never been good at pretending to be someone else and never before had he felt the need to do that, but on the other hand he had never been in a similar situation either.
Sure, he had had to deal with the consequences of his acting before, like everybody else had, but how should he deal with this? How was he supposed to act like his usual energetic self with that guild weighting down his spark?
Of course no one asked him to, at least not out loud, but when he didn't act like himself the others would notice something was wrong and then they would worry and most importantly they would ask question he would have to answer, but just couldn't. He couldn't face noble Prowl or faithful Optimus and tell them he had doomed an innocent mech, an innocent youngling like himself, to the closest fate to the Pits anyone who hadn't served in the Great War was able to imagine.
Ratchet would understand. The old med-bot had after all served in the war, but Bumblebee feared the methods the grumpy old mech would probably try out to 'cheer him up'. He didn't want to listen to what Ratchet had seen and done. He didn't want to have to listen to worse things happening to others. He didn't know what he wanted to hear from him, but it was not that.
Bulkhead would be able to make him feel better. He knew what had happened back then and he had never judged the other youngling for it. He was a real friend, but that was exactly the reason Bumblebee didn't want to talk to him either. He didn't want to bother his best friend with that burden and Sari . . . well, Sari was a human, sort of. She couldn't really understand and had her own problems right now. Actually Bumblebee already felt bad for not really being there for her, so he suppressed his need to talk with someone, anyone, and continued to pretend to be himself.