A/N- I...don't know what to say about this one, folks. It came to me on a whim. Note to self- fear the whims. This was actually inspired by this-- aim2./art/Meanwhile-in-the-afterlife-56617619?offset25. -chuckles-

Um...yeah. Enjoy? ...Yeah.

Without further adeu, I present to you,

Swearfest

Hidan and Tayuya's version of a fluffy love story.

(PS- let's pretend Hidan is dead. Mmkay? Mmkay.)

--

"Fuck you, pretty boy!"

"Fuck me? What the fuck, you bitch! What did I do to you!"

"I don't fucking know! Just rot in hell!"

"I am rotting in hell!"

"GO FUCK YOURSELF WITH A FUCKING FUCKSTICK YOU SHIT-FACED FUCKER!"

Hidan twitched faintly. "..."

Tayuya narrowed her eyes even further. "..."

"Why?" He inquired, raising a brow confusedly.

"...what the fuck, pretty boy." Tayuya deadpanned, one shoulder slumping slightly.

"No, seriously, why?"

Determining he really was asking such a monumentally stupid question, Tayuya shook her head. "...Because I SAID so, asshole!"

"Well that ain't good enough, heathen bitch!" And now it was back to this.

"Stop calling me a bitch, pretty boy!" Tayuya snapped, glaring at the taller man.

"Stop calling me pretty boy, heathen bitch!"

"WHY THE FUCK WOULD I DO THAT? You're pretty, aren't you?"

It was silent. Tayuya twitched. "I mean, that is to say, you think you are."

Slowly, Hidan grinned. "You think I'm sexy!"

"WHAT?!"

"You do! You think I'm dead-sexy!"

"Dead, yes, sexy, fuck no you shit-faced pansy-ass!" Tayuya ground out, hands balling into fists.

"LYING BITCH!" Hidan accused, pointing a finger at her, still grinning maniacally.

"UGH! You son of a bitch's lesbian girlfriend! I do not think you are attractive in any way, shape or fucking form!"

"Aren't you creative with your lies!"

"AGH!" Tayuya launched herself at Hidan, teeth bared and flute poised for pummeling.