He didn't achieve much at all in his life.

There comes a time - for some, it's when they grow adults, for others, it's the night of their thirtieth birthday - when everyone comes to a realisation that in fact, they have nothing at all. That their existence only consisted of those same dull days, repeating over and over. That they only lived to chase their tails, going in circles, pursuing careers and earning money - only to die finally, all alone, because in death, everybody is alone.

Reno was different. Maybe being a Turk changed one's point of view. Maybe, when one lives with death close by all the time, he can learn to appreciate whatever he has. Even if it's not much.

Because he was fucked up and his life was, just as much. What did he have?

He grew up in the slums of Midgar, raised by a bunch of prostitutes in a brothel; one of them might had actually been his mother. He remembered Irielle, the bleach-blonde woman that always smiled at his childish questions and bought him sweets, even if she had nothing to eat herself. Maybe... He cherished that memory. It was one of the few he could hold dear.

When he was roughly ten, the brothel was attacked by some gang, the prostitutes killed in front of the helpless boy and Reno himself was gang-raped. All because the brothel's owner didn't pay in time. Or something. Reno never forgot the faces of them. Not for a second in his life. Later, upon joining ShinRa, he had his revenge. He'd made sure they suffered.

He'd killed to live and he'd killed for a living. Before he'd joined the Turks, he did everything to survive and that included murdering. He never had regrets. Why should he? That was the law of the slums. You either lived and killed those that wanted to kill you, or you died in some empty corner, bleeding too much and staring at the plate instead of the sky.

There was no sky in the slums. Reno was used to that; or so he thought. Because when he got up there, to the plate, to become a Turk - he could never go back. The sky, the sun, the sunset - he got addicted to the impressions and no amount of money could make him give it up. Nothing could compare to the alluring hues of the sun setting somewhere below the horizon. Nothing else in the world was that beautiful.

Except for, maybe, Tseng's eyes when they stared at him so intensely, just before bliss would force them to close and those lips to part in pleasure.

Because, Reno reckoned, that was it. It was his achievement in this life. He saw the sun and the sky. He had Tseng, if even just for a short time. He didn't know whether it was love or something else. If it wasn't love, well, he didn't care, for it sure was the closest thing to it. And he knew for a fact that Tseng did love him, from the long glances of those deep brown Wutaian eyes, from the rare warm smiles that he was granted with...

This was what he had. This was what he had achieved. Not much, but hell; it was more than he'd ever even dared to hope for.

Maybe that was why dying didn't bring him a sense of regret.

A/N: Uh, not the best of my fics. Because I had this planned out and then I quite literally forgot what I wanted to happen. Oh well. I still kinda like it in a way. My first attempt at Reno's past xd One day I will write a long fic that will cover that. And more. Yeah, like, sure, I don't even believe it myself.