A/N: This is the end, for good. I don't want to keep adding to the story, its pretty much explained, which was really what I wanted in the end when I first thought of the idea. I'm playing around with the idea of another Embry/Bella story possibly; not entirely sure about that one yet. So here's the Epilogue; I hope you enjoy it. And thanks a million times over for everyone that reviewed! Again, if you have an requests about a pairing/plot or anything, let me know and I'll try to write you something; Twilight or Harry Potter. Thanks again; Love ya'll!
Listen to a Heart
I'd spent the past 6 years of my life with a true and honest meaning to it, I had a purpose in life and genuine purpose and a need for my mere existence. Life had been; a constant complication, but there was nothing that I'd change at all about my life. Even the dark times right after Edward Cullen had left me alone in the woods all those years ago, even the painful nights I'd laid crying over Jacob's imprint and another lost love, even the trying and troubled nights and days I'd spent worrying about the pack, watching over the pack, and loving them as my own.
I stared out the window that showed a view of my expansive backyard, it fell right outside the reservation line and Vampires; the Cullens to be exact where often visitors to my home that I shared with my husband Embry Call and our two children. I loved him more every day, every hour, every minute and every second; he truly was the perfect man for me, in every way possible. He understood me in a way that no one had before, he knew what I needed, and wanted before I even had a chance to figure it out for myself. He read me like an open book, something that my inability to communicate adored completely. He was 100% male, wolf, husband, friend, and father.
I smiled to myself as I watched the boys pushing and playing with each other, even now that they'd graduated, and grown into adults… I laughed at the thought, when would my boys ever really become adults, I doubt ever. The entire pack was here for Avery; our 4 year old son's birthday party. All the guys loved a chance to throw a party, and get their entire families together. My eyes glanced over each and every pack member's body, checking their emotions, gauging their feelings and hearts. It was something that now came naturally to me, as all my motherly and protection instincts did.
I'd changed over the years, I was still clumsy and I still blushed profusely at just about everything, but I'd grown up and I could look at life and understand that heartbreak and loss was important even though it ached like nothing else ever would. I felt old some days, older than I should, seeing as I was only going to be turning 24 this year, I laughed at myself and shook my head, drama queen rang through my mind and I laughed even harder at the memory of the boys and their constant teasing over the years.
I continued my search over my boys, and stopped abruptly when a sharp pain shot through my body, settling as an ache around my heart, tightening it and making me draw deep shaky breaths; Seth. He'd always been one of the quieter boys, a little lost and a little confused even now that he'd graduated from high school; he still seemed uncomfortable in his own body, and even his own mind. Embry had confided in me one night a few years back that he'd seen and heard things within Seth's mind one night on patrol, which had made him whimper and feel immense sadness for the teen at the time.
I shifted through the emotions, as I looked more closely at Seth, he looked exhausted. I felt a sadness in him that I recognized in myself many years ago, a deep loss and confusion about something. I felt love and a sliver of happiness over something, a joy that could never be taken away from Seth, more than likely his love of his family and the pack, the joy of the friendship and brotherhood he had within the pack. I felt a sharp stab of something deep within my own heart, a longing for something that was just out of reach. Seth had always been a little bit of a misfit in the pack, often times when the Cullens came for a visit Seth would rush over and spend countless hours in their presence without it bothering him one bit. Though of course Embry was the same, he would spend time with the Cullens, but I knew that he did it because he loved me and he understood that they were family to me also. But he also did it because he could never hate or dislike anyone just because of something that they really had no control over, none of the Cullens had picked their fate, none of them had chosen nor wanted to become a 'blood sucking monster' as many had often called them.
I instantly left my bedroom a heavy feeling hanging over my head, and an ache within my heart. I stepped out into the backyard, and forced a smile onto my own face, it would do no one any good to worry everyone else about Seth's feelings which he was obviously repressing and trying to hide from everyone, including myself which stung a little bit, my boys had always come to me first with every problem they'd had; no matter how big nor small it was. I instantly looked for Embry, I just needed a little bit of his love and strength to settle the ache that was within me, I finally saw him across the yard playing with our 2 and half yeard old daughter; Calleigh. I took a moment to enjoy the sight, the carefree smiles and the heartwarming laughter, I sighed and closed my eyes enjoying a moment of gratefulness for everything I'd been blessed with in life. I jumped slightly when a warm hand fell down onto my shoulder, and turned my head as my eyes opened quickly, I smiled up at Quil before he pulled me tightly into a hug and I sighed into his embrace. If I played favorites; Quil would be mine, aside from Embry for obvious reasons, but Quil was just someone you had to love, adore, and respect even. He was carefree, open and giving; like Embry he didn't have a mean bone within his body and he was one of the most helpful of the pack, when the younger boys were making their shifts for the first time and were scared and didn't understand it at all.
"Hello Mother Bella," Quil said gruffly, making me laugh at the silly nickname the Quil insisted on using at all times.
"Hello Quil," I sighed again, and let the warmth of Quil wash over me and soothe me. Suddenly a slight bundle bumped against our legs, and we looked down, before Quil broke into a bright smile and let me go instantly. I couldn't help the heartwarming feeling wash over me as I watch Quil pick 8 year old Claire up and tickle her mercilessly. "Hello Claire, have fun you two, I'll see you later."
A happy 'goodbye' cheered from behind me as I made my way towards Embry, after casting a quick glance at Seth and noticed how he'd removed himself from everyone else slightly, as he sat at a table and just watched everyone else. I ran into someone, and was caught and righted quickly before I could fall and embarrass myself completely. I looked up and laughed at the expression across Leah's face; exasperation.
"Thank you, Leah." I said softly, as she rolled her eyes and stepped away from me to wind an arm around Brady's waist easily.
"Shoulda let her fall Leah, would have caused quite the scene!" Brady said excitedly, which only caused Leah to roll her eyes again. They made an odd pair, but they grounded and completed each other, it was a case where opposites definitely did attract. And besides they made a stunningly beautiful couple.
"Oh shush you," I said, softly tapping Brady's cheek before kissing it and continuing again towards Embry. I finally made it to him, just as our daughter took off toddling away towards Jacob, her godfather whom loved her dearly, as he picked her up and waved at us. I wrapped my arms around Embry's waist tightly, pressing my face into the strong muscle down his back, he didn't move but simply placed his warm hands over mine and allowed me a moment.
"Something is wrong," he said finally, turning in my arms and looking down at me.
"Yes," I was a terrible liar, so there wasn't a point in trying to lie to him, and besides there was never anything I kept from Embry, he was my rock and he understand when I needed to talk and when I just needed him to understand my need for silence. "Yes, something is wrong, and it worries me."
"Why does it worry you," He said softly, brushing his thumb down the crease between my eyes I hadn't even realized was there, I felt the small tension beginning in my neck and knew I was giving myself a headache.
"Because, its Seth." And I knew that for Embry, that was enough for him to understand my worry, he'd seen into the troubled teenage mind and he'd heard the depressing and hateful thoughts. "There are emotions coming off of him strongly today, and not many of them feel at all good. There's this burning self hate within him Em, I hate to see him hurting, I can't take it. When I felt it, my heart ached so deeply, so badly, I felt as if though I was losing you and the kids, forever."
Embry's eyes darkened and he looked up quickly, I could tell his eyes were scanning for Seth, and I could tell when they found him because Embry's entire body tensed.
"What is it?" I whispered.
"He's crying Bella, silent tears are falling down his face and I don't even think he realizes it." Embry's voice was harsh, deep and broken. He'd always felt protective of Seth and Colin, especially Seth though after he'd seen a small bit of what Seth suffered through in his own thoughts.
"I need to go to him now," I said softly, my throat constricting at the mere thought of Seth's pain. Embry didn't say another word, he kissed my forehead softly, and pushed me in Seth's direction. I walked quickly towards the young man, and tried to settle my own emotions that were bubbling within my chest, my heart, and my soul. I laid a soft hand on his shoulders, and felt his entire body tense rigidly beneath my slim hand.
"Seth," I whispered softly. His body relaxed slightly, but he was still a bit tense. "Come walk with me, please." He got up instantly, no questions like always, after the first year none of the boys questioned my concerns, my questions or my reactions to anything anymore. And more often times than not, they listened to my requests without complaint. He stood up, stretching slightly, before turning to look at me with haunted eyes. I felt my heart break a thousand times over, and couldn't stop my hand from resting against his tear covered cheek. He seemed to realize suddenly that he was crying, and I felt a spike of nervousness and anxiety crash through him so hard, that it almost made me shake. I blocked off his emotions immediately and pulled him by the hand after me, as I ventured off towards the woods without another word.
We walked for what seemed like forever, silently and without direction or motive. I didn't say a word, as I allowed Seth to calm himself down on his own, and he didn't say a word, or mutter a single sound, until finally we stopped on the edge of a small river.
"It hurts," He whispered in a voice that was so broken, I had to wrap my arms around him and offer him any comfort, any affection, and all the love that I could. He clung to me instantly, like a small child would to his mother, and he began to sob against my neck. "It hurts so much that I can hardly stand it anymore, I just can't deal with it Mama." And I ached then, as I'd never ached before, never had one of my boys been so lost and broken before.
"I know baby, I know." I whispered soothingly, as I slowly lowered us towards the ground softly. And I held him for a while, rocking him and he cried and sobbed and coughed against me, his body shaking and vibrating in my arms. I was amazed at his control over his changing, many of the others boys would have shifted by now, with this out of control pain ripping through them that I felt rolling off of Seth, wave after wave of it.
After he'd settled himself down, he pulled away from me and kissed my cheek lovingly, before turning towards the river and holding my hand tightly. I wanted to make everything in his world okay, I wanted him to smile and laugh and be as carefree and loving as he'd been the day I'd met him.
"I imprinted," He said finally, his voice hoarse and rough from all the crying. I was speechless for a moment, not knowing what to say, not understanding why he felt this way if he'd imprinted. "I imprinted on a guy." I felt a small understanding then, but only slightly. "I imprinted on a guy, a male vampire." And there it was, everything fell into place and I understood completely.
"Oh baby," I said softly, squeezing his hand. All the time spent with the Cullens, how much he seemed to adore and love all of them, even Rosalie who had been a nightmare at first. How much he seemed to talk about them, with youthful excitement, and how he'd constantly question when they'd come for a visit again. And then when Seth had been old enough to understand the feelings, the imprint, he withdrew. He still visited when the Cullens came, but thinking back, I could remember he'd been withdrawn from their early visit for the past couple years. He was there because he needed the same amount of face to face with his imprint, he was slowly driving himself insane because of his fear, of rejection mostly, I guessed. Rejection for the imprint, and rejection from the pack.
"An imprint doesn't have to be," I cleared my throat and fought the blush that was creeping upon my face. "It doesn't have to be like me and Embry."
"I know that Bella!" Seth said roughly, pulling away from me and standing up suddenly. His back was rigid, and his shoulders tense, his mouth was turned down into a frown that looked so unfamiliar on Seth's boyish face. "I know that, but I'm attracted to him. I- I lllove him. I love him so much," He finished on a whisper, as his eyes closed tightly.
"You should never leave words like that unspoken, ever Seth. No matter what the outcome, if you feel those deep emotions, truly for him then you've got to tell him, its only fair to yourself and to him. I can't bear to see you like this any longer, you can't hold it all in like this." I said, while pushing myself up from the ground, suddenly feeling as though I was 50 years old. Being the pack mother came with a few down sides, all the emotions wore on my body, and at times I felt way beyond my own young age, but the feeling never lasted long and it wasn't painful just an odd annoyance most of the time. I sighed and shifted to my other foot, uncomfortably.
"Mama," Seth said softly, his eyes soft and worried. I smiled at him, but it was slightly strained, this episode was lasting a bit longer than the ones I'd had before.
"I'm alright, just stiff, don't you worry your pretty little head about me."
"I," He stopped and took a deep breath, I allowed him all the time he needed as I leaned my body against a tall tree, sighing as my muscles loosened and relaxed. "I don't think I can tell him."
"You must baby, it's the only option. If anything, he'll understand your need to be around him more, if even in his presence. And any of the Cullens, no matter, which one it is; taken or not, they'd without hesitation be there for you. You know how much they all simply adore you, Seth." I said slowly, needing him to understand that he couldn't hold it all in. I needed him to realize that it was eating him up inside, and he was just pushing it further and further down.
"It's Edward," He said softly. And I felt a little jolt slide through my body, and then an immense feeling of love for Seth. I walked to him and wrapped my arms around his lean waist, burying my face into his shoulder.
"He'll love you, Seth. If not right away, in time. There is nothing about you, that Edward has ever disliked. But, how have you hidden this from him for so long?" I asked softly, rubbing circles on his lower back.
"I sing in my head, the entire time I'm around them. I don't talk, so I don't have to worry about listening to the actual words of the conversations. So I sing, over and over, sad songs, love songs, bitter songs, anything I can think of; while I listen to the melody of his voice, and feel the coldness of his being." He'd said in a way that had my heart clenching tightly, at the amount of love and adoration present in Seth's voice.
"You really do love him," I said softly, allowing myself to feel Seth's emotions; the love was intense and bright, blindingly so almost. I always knew that Seth was special, that he was different, but I never expected his love to be so all consuming and beautiful really. "You love him so much."
"Yes, I do. I really do, Mama. I love him more than I could ever comprehend until today, and I'm going to tell him I've imprinted on him." Seth said finally, and then suddenly his entire body stiffened, and a growl slide from his throat slowly. Before I knew it, I was pushed behind Seth, and he was sniffing and searching the trees across the river. I felt the tension ripple across the air, as I held onto Seth's shoulder that was shaking slightly.
"What is it?" I whispered.
"Something is there," Seth said lowly. "Vampire!" He said in shook, and he curled back into my arms slightly. I stood completely still, as my memory jogged to catch up, Avery's party.
"The Cullens, they said they'd try to make it to Avery's party…" I finished softly.
"There's only one," Seth said with a whimper.
"Edward," I said evenly, as I glared across the river. My motherly instincts overpowering my moment of fear, as I stepped in front of Seth's trembling body and cursed the aged vampire as he slide out into view. His eyes were dark and intense, as he looked across the river past me, almost as if he wasn't seeing anything. Seth whimpered behind me, and clutched the sides of his head, I heard him mumbled a song under his breath.
"Edward Cullen!" I yelled, and took satisfaction in the fact that he flinched slightly. "Get out of his mind this instant," I growled lowly, taking a step closer to the river. Edward tilted his head to the side, and smiled slowly. I knew that smile, it was already too late, Edward knew everything.
Seth let out a soft whine, that had my heart breaking, before he fell to his knees and rocked himself back and forth, shaking his head as the tears began to fall from his deep brown broken eyes. I turned and went to him quickly, but before I could wrap him in my arms, Edward was there pulling Seth away from me and into his own arms. I stopped and stood completely still, staring at the scene before me.
Edward had fallen to the ground in a ungraceful fashion, that I'd never before witnessed from him, and he'd pulled Seth into his lap, wrapping strong, cold arms around the younger boy, as his mouth moved quickly and quietly against Seth's ears. I tuned myself into Seth's emotions completely, and was amazed at the complexity that really was Seth, when it came to emotions. I felt heartache, and embarrassment, along with happiness and relief, there was a slight bit of hope and a strong burst of loyalty and trust. But most of all, what I felt the most, the thing that brought a smile to my face, was the love that was pouring out of Seth, and the simple first sentence I finally heard from Edward.
"I love you, too."
And finally, for now, the pack was settled, happy and content, I thought as I stumbled my way back towards my home through the woods alone, leaving Seth and Edward to figure things out for themselves. I smiled brightly as I stepped from the woods, and my eyes connected with Embry's; my rock, my strength, my love, my faith, my hope, my dreams, my husband, my everything. And as his eyes, so filled with love, bored into my own, I thought how amazing it was, that I had to go all the way around, to get where I belonged.
That's it! It's over for good, and Embry wasn't in it much, but I wanted to show the motherly side of Bella, and how much she'd grown up and become truly like a mother of the pack. Anyways, I'm thinking about doing another Bella/Embry as I said at the beginning of this chapter… Any Ideas!? Review them to me! Anyways… Let me know what you think of the ending! I hope ya'll enjoyed it. :)