Throwing myself down on the couch, I heaved a huge sigh and stretched out. Remus had mentioned something about an essay that was due tomorrow, but I quickly pushed it out of my mind. It wasn't time for work – I just wanted to relax and wait and see if anyone saw me lounging here.
Maybe one of those fifth year girls that kept staring at me. And then they would come over and I would get to spend the night snogging. So much better than essay writing.
I quickly scanned the room for one of those girls, but instead, a book on the table caught my eye. Usually, books weren't usually something that interested me but something about this one, the way it was just abandoned on the table, made me reach out and grab it.
Nothing was on the cover, so I held it out in front of me and began ruffling through the pages. It looked as though someone was handwriting something – an essay (long one), a journal, maybe something else...
Stopping at one of the pages, I leaned forward and read a couple of the words. Pining, love, more pining...what was this? A story?
I turned back to the first page and saw the words 'UNTITLED' by Ivy E. Bennett.
Who the hell is Ivy E. Bennett?
Luckily, at that moment, Lily just happened to walk by.
"Evans!" I greeted her happily, gesturing to the seat next to me. Instead of sitting down, she just stopped and stared me down. I stared back at her and said, "How's my favorite fiesty red-head doing today? Smashing, I hope?"
She sighed. "What do you want Black?"
I grinned and responded, "Who's Ivy Bennett?"
Her expression turned into one of confusion and I could only grin even more broadly. "Why do you want to know?" Ah, she was suspicious. Wonderful.
I held up the book. "I just may have found something of her's," I said, waving it around.
Lily's eyes lit up in recognition. "Oh, her journal. You know, Ivy, she's my roommate." She said it as if I was supposed to go 'aha' and know exactly who she was talking about. I just blinked at her. "The blonde." Blank stare. "Short, green eyes, long hair..." She was staring back at me like she wanted me to start nodding. Instead, I shook my head. Lily sighed in frustration and rolled her eyes at the same time. Wow, talent. "She was at Madame Puddifoot's with us." I continued my stare. "She was sitting right next to you!" Lily empathized loudly.
"There was someone sitting next to me?" I asked, raising my eyebrows. I didn't remember a blonde sitting next to me. There really was a blonde sitting next to me?
Lily growled at me. Yes, growled. "Listen, just leave her journal where you found it and she'll come back for it. I have to start patrols and I don't have time to deal with you right now!" And with that, she stormed off in a huff.
Just because I didn't understand. She had some issues with patience.
Sitting the book back down on the table, I took my seat down on the couch, and waited. If Lily said there was a mysterious, elusive Ivy Bennett in her dormitory, then I wanted to see this girl. She had to be joking – there wasn't an Ivy I knew of.
This was going to take forever. Letting my mind drift off into fantasies about those fifth year girls, I lounged back and watched the table in front of me.
Glancing up, I noticed a frazzled girl running up to the table. Since she had blonde hair and was reaching toward the book on the table frantically, I could only assume it was Ivy Bennett. Hmm, was this really one of Lily's roommates? I seriously had never seen this girl before.
She grabbed the book and held it to her chest. I raised an eyebrow at this. Why would someone care so much about a book? And so I had to ask.
"How's the story coming along?"
She froze, still turned away from me. At least she didn't start squealing because I was talking to her. That happened sometimes. I watched as she slowly turned around and caught her gaze (green eyes, Lily was right). She looked younger than me, but I knew she couldn't be that much younger if she was in my year.
And she just stared at me, eyes wide. I tried to match her expression but it wasn't possible. She was beginning to fidget and then said, in a small voice, "What?"
I turned on my grin. "Your story," I repeated, watching as she continued to stare at me like she didn't know what to say. She couldn't be mad – no, she was confused.
"You read it?" she finally managed to say softly. Maybe she just spoke like that – soft and quiet – all the time. I wasn't used to someone being that quiet...
I leaned forward to hear her better. "Skimmed it really. I was just wondering who it belonged to." I meant to end there, but by her expression, I knew what she was thinking. "Lily came by and told me it was your's."
She began chewing on her fingernails. Probably a nervous habit of her's. It would probably be endearing to some people, but it just made me raise an eyebrow.
"Um, oh, well, okay..." she said so quickly that I could barely hear one word from the next. I guess she wasn't the best at talking to people.
I didn't really understand how people could be like that. Why wouldn't they want to talk to other people? Getting up, I made my way over to her with a grin. She looked positively frightened. Maybe I could just leave and let her hyperventilate by herself. As I brushed past her, I decided to say goodnight.
"Well, I'll see you later," I said, and then, almost as if I remembered her name at just that moment, I added, "Ivy Bennett." Her name was foreign on my tongue, but it was interesting – the way the new name was spoken made me grin.
When I saw her again a week later, I decided to continue this amusement for a bit longer. I was probably one of the only people who ever read her story; she had to be on the edge about it. It was a perfect opportunity for a new game.
"Ivy!" I called out in the corridor, seeing her try to slip away into the crowd.
She turned to face me with wide eyes. Oh, this was bound to be very amusing. "Hi," she greeted me, confirming my conclusion that she really did speak that soft.
"Remember when I found your story?" I brought up the subject as we started walking. She just nodded. I felt a grin coming on – this was going to be too much fun. "What's it about?"
I was right – I could just tell that she was freaking out inside. Easier than I thought this would be. "Oh, it's nothing. Just a story," she tried to end the conversation there.
Right where I wanted her. "Well, who's it about?"
All of these questions were beginning to frighten her. "Uh, no one really," she responded, turning away from me.
I couldn't hold in my grin anymore. How to continue with these teasing? Hmm, if I startled her... "Is it about me?" I asked.
She looked as if she was going to fall right down on the floor in front of me and start to hyperventilate. Which meant I won.
She couldn't even speak, instead, she just spluttered and choked. It was one of the most hilarious things I had ever seen. I tried to keep a straight face but couldn't, and began to laugh. Quickly explaining that I was joking in the midst of her laughter, she finally lightened up.
Ivy Bennett was just too easy to toy with.
I had another opportunity when we were seated next to each other in Transfiguration. As we tried to duplicate a book, I began my questioning once again.
Leaning forward on the table, I got a good glimpse of her face. I wanted to see her reaction. "You never told me what you were writing about," I announced.
The subject of her novel was always touchy – an easy way to get to her. Her cheeks were burning red, and she looked down at the table. "It's a fiction work."
For some reason, I wasn't expecting that answer. She was actually writing an entire story, a novel? For fun? Who did that? "You're writing a novel?" I had to question her. She couldn't be serious – ha. Serious.
Really? A whole novel – with the long, complicated sentences and pages with words? That kind of novel? "And actual novel?" I emphasized.
"Yes," she confirmed for me, sounding a bit more sure of herself.
Maybe really was serious about this. I had never even met a girl that actually wanted to write a long novel for fun. How interesting. "What's it about then? Adventure, fantasy, romance?" I inquired.
"Uh, it's an adventure romance, I guess," she answered and I watched as her eyes lit up when she began talking about it. "And it's kind of historical. The setting is in the 16th century."
Here I was, joking to her about the novel she was writing, and she was being completely serious about it. She really was writing something important to her.
Who did that? I opened my mouth to ask but never got the chance to with Minnie glaring at me. "Get back to work"...when did I ever do work? That's like...asking the impossible.
When I got really bored, I turned to what I called "see what the mysterious Ivy Bennett doing at the moment". Normally, I just glanced around, quickly found her writing (when was she not? I didn't understand how she could write that much, hell, I couldn't understand how anyone could write that much), and then it satisfied my curiosity.
However, one Wednesday night, I found myself laying upside down on an armchair in the common room, staring at Remus sitting across from me.
He didn't look that amused.
"How can there be absolutely nothing to do?" James groaned, slumped across his own chair, staring up blankly at the ceiling.
Remus shook his head. "We have an essay due next week. You could do that."
Peter laughed. "You're hilarious, Moony."
That he was. "I think I'm going to do my rounds," I announced. Remus shook his head again in disgust. His version of rounds and mine were absolutely different. He was a prefect: he had to do rounds to make sure everyone stayed out of trouble. I did my version of rounds to find trouble.
Falling out of the chair (gracefully, I might add), I took a quick look around and stopped on a girl huddled over a book, writing something down furiously.
And that could only be one person. Slowly making my way over, I stopped behind the couch, and leaned forward slightly.
Suddenly, I really wanted to know exactly what she was writing. I wanted to know who she was writing about and how someone could write that much about some fantasy characters. What was the appeal in make-believe characters? It wasn't like they were real.
She wrote in neat cursive, making it easy to decipher each word.
"I have never received a single glance from Sebastian," I told Marianne softly, smoothing out my skirt as I stood up from the bed.
She frowned, creases appearing on her face. "Anne..."
I looked down at the floor. "It's fine," I exclaimed, raising my head and letting a smile mask my hurt expression.
I looked up from her words to see her green eyes staring into mine. "What are you doing?" she asked, taking a deep breath to try to calm her words. But her voice still shook.
"Trying to read over your shoulder," I answered truthfully, leaning even more forward.
She quickly turned the book away from my view and said something that sounded like a foreign language. With my knowledge of other languages, she probably could have just spoke one and I wouldn't have known what she was doing. "Care to repeat?" I asked instead.
She was holding that book to her chest again as if I was going to reach out and grab it from her. "What did you read?" she said slowly.
She probably expected me to answer with something quick, but I wanted to give her a story. I jumped over the back of the couch, sitting down next to her while giving her a big grin. "Some chick named Anne-" That was that person's name, right? Yes, Anne. With an 'e'...I couldn't remember who the other character was. "-was talking to some other person about a guy named Sebastian."
Sebastian – what an interesting name. Though I didn't have reason to talk – who in their right mind would name their child Sirius? Oh, right, my dear mother. Old bat of a woman.
"Um, well, there's more to it than that," Ivy answered me. Was she actually saying that she was willingly to tell me the whole story?
Me – Sirius Black, someone she didn't know and probably never even thought about? Very, very interesting...
So, I was intrigued. "Exactly. That's why you should give me a recap of what's going on." Now would she tell me everything?
She looked down at the couch and began to wring her hands. Very small hands, actually. Never seen hands that small before in my life. "Why do you care so much?" she finally whispered.
I answered quickly, shrugging, "It just seems interesting."
And then she just changed. "I don't think you'd be interested in it." What? Me not interested in something that I knew nothing about? Of course I wanted to know what she was writing about! I wanted to uncover this mystery.
"Try me," I challenged her.
She was taken aback by my tone and immediately started flipping back pages of her story, trying to tell me the entire story. It was about some village and these two people, Sebastian and Anne. I watched as she rambled on about Anne's feelings for Sebastian, wondering how someone could possibly write about fictional characters. She was so deeply involved in the story that it made me step back a little bit.
She cared for her characters. This is how she spent her free time: falling into their world. No wonder I never saw her before.
She was never really here.
"...That's all I really have so far," she concluded, looking at me as if I was going to judge her. But how could I judge her world?
Instead, I settled with, "Anne and Sebastian, huh? I like the names, they flow..." I couldn't just say that I didn't understand... "Interesting story, Ivy," I added, throwing in a grin.
I had thought it was just going to be a simple game of teasing: now, I wanted to know more about this girl and her story. It frustrated me to no end that I couldn't see where this girl was coming from.
I was Sirius Black: I always knew what was going on in a girl's mind. I always knew exactly what they were thinking (usually, it was about me) but with this Ivy Bennett, I didn't know a single thing.
And I just wanted to understand.
And this is the beginning of Sirius's POV. It's a bit different from Ivy's and I have to constantly remind myself that I'm not writing from Ivy's POV. Sirius thinks in shorter sentences and witty one-liners. It's quite annoying sometimes. And the chapters are longer. There will be about 20-ish (this is so going to change) and each chapter will be as long as it needs to be. I'm not sure how long right now. Maybe around 2,000 words?
Anyway, the title comes from KT Tunstall's song. I was experimenting with vision words and I just decided on Suddenly I See, because...Ivy thinks nobody sees and then Sirius suddenly does. I know...creative. I had other titles like The One I See, Can't You See?, and such...but I like Suddenly I See better.
Updates will be at least once a week. At least. Not everyday. I'm sorry but college is full of crazy work and I don't have the time to post everyday anymore. But I still love you all.
Because you're awesome.