Pretty Disclaimer: The characters of Naruto are not my own!
Warning(s): This story contains dark and suggestive material. Don't complain about it.
Ten Little Pieces
It was our special game. When no one else was around, Nii-san loved to play it. At first, I was scared, but he promised me that I would have fun. He promised me that it would be our little secret. He knew just what to say to blind me—to convince me of the right where there was only wrong.
When we first played his little game, I was six years old. I wanted to make my older brother proud. Everyone loved him. I had to be among the adoring crowd. What was family for?
When did it stop being just a game, Itachi?
I. Only Blue
Itachi held my hand loosely in his, and I glanced up at him from behind my lashes. As soon as our parents' car was out of view, he looked down at me with a small smile. My hand began to sweat; I knew he was thinking of playing our game again. I wasn't sure whether I was excited or scared, but I let him lead me back into the house...
Gasping, I sat up and leaned over the side of my bed, vomiting into the metal trash can. A layer of sweat shone on my forehead, and my ebony locks were plastered to my head. My hands were shaking as I rubbed at my clammy face. Even miles away, he found a way to ruin my life.
A bottle of pills sat on my nightstand, illuminated by the sudden flash of a car's headlights. I reached over and took the cool bottle in my hand, retrieving my glass of room-temperature water that remained on the oak table. Unscrewing the cap, I tipped the bottle over into my hand and stared at the single blue, oval pill that rested in my shaking palm. Thirty milligrams of peace and quiet. Thirty milligrams of Paxil.
"How did you sleep, dear?" At breakfast, my mother asked her usual question and flashed her usual smile.
I poked at my scrambled eggs and gave her a small shrug. The smile on her face lessened, but it didn't disappear. She reached across the table to touch my hand, but my father interfered.
"He's not a little boy. He can handle a few restless nights," my father said in a gruff tone.
He didn't look at me, but I wasn't surprised. Ever since Itachi was charged with second-degree rape, my father avoided me at all costs. The only time we really spoke was when we were in the presence of my mother. When he drove me to school and picked me up after swim practice, he would grip the wheel until his knuckles turned white and stare at the road as if it would suddenly open up and swallow us whole. He blamed me for scarring the family name.
"Would you like some more eggs?" My mother offered and held out the pan of scrambled eggs.
"No, thanks," I replied and pushed my plate away. "I have to get ready for school." I bowed to my father and left the room, ignoring my mother's whispered conversation with him.
My pills kept me in a sedated mood, but they didn't fix anything. My mind was full of bitter memories. As I stood under the steady stream of hot water, I could feel Itachi's hands traveling lightly over my body. I shut my eyes, but I was met by frightening images.
I took the plastic figurine and shoved it into the soapy water, pretending that the soldier was drowning in a pit of acid. Laughing, I reeled the soldier back in and then tossed it over the side of the tub. Glancing over, I saw my brother catch the soldier in his hand.
"What did you do that for, Nii-san? He was in enemy territory," I frowned, making a beard of bubbles.
Itachi kneeled down beside the tub and wiped the bubbles from my face. He sat the soldier on the edge of the tub and then took my washcloth in his hand.
"I can take a bath by myself now. I'm a big kid." I sighed as he told me to put my arms up.
"This is like a game, otouto," he said, running his hand over my soapy arm. "Our special game." His hand dipped beneath the water...
I opened my eyes and turned off the water. My head was spinning, and my stomach was churning. I had trusted Itachi with my life. I was wrong to do such a thing; I swore I'd never let anyone else in. As I stepped out of the shower, I grabbed my towel from the back of the bathroom door. Padding across the wooden floor, I left a small trail of water droplets. My footsteps were slow, and I paused outside of his room.
Father frequently entered my brother's room. He made my mother dust and rearrange on a daily basis. If I weren't so medicated, people would have thought he was the crazy one. I reached my hand out to grasp the shoji door. It slid open without a sound.
The sheets were still in disarray from the last night Itachi slept there. The morning after that, my father watched as his eldest son was escorted—by his police buddies—to the station. Some said that they never saw it coming. They were blind.
"You don't want to be late for school!" Mother called from downstairs.
Silently, I turned and walked out. Just as I was closing the door, my father arrived at the top of the stairs. He saw me standing so close to that precious space.
"Get dressed." The way he looked at me when he saw me in a towel made me want to disappear.
He said that it was my fault that I had been raped numerous times. He said rape victims made themselves easy targets by parading around like common whores. I was six years old, yet I was responsible? When he turned to go back downstairs, I finally opened my mouth.
"Fuck you." Whether he heard me or not, he kept walking.
Ignoring the problems never made them go away, but my family lived by that motto. In three days, my brother returned home. Having served two years in prison, he was out on parole. Although he wasn't supposed to be within thirty feet of me, my father got around the rules and regulations with one of his professional smiles.
"Sasuke? Your father is waiting in the car. Hurry up." My mother handed me a bento box as soon as I got down the stairs.
Sitting next to my father, I stared out the window at the gray sky. Everything about the day was appropriate. I could feel his eyes boring holes into the back of my head, but I refused to turn and acknowledge him. The silent car rides annoyed him more than anything.
"Itachi comes home this weekend. You're going to stop this melancholy act and show some true Uchiha character. I didn't say anything when you stopped seeing your psychiatrist, and I overlooked your...episodes, but I won't have you driving my first son away." The sting of his words didn't reach my heart; my pills dulled all the pain.
"I won't screw anything up," I said, opening the car door as soon as he reached the school lot.
"Your mother is going to need help decorating for the welcoming party. As soon as your homework is complete, talk to her about what she needs done." He turned his head back on the road, signaling that the conversation had ended.
Slamming the car door, I turned and began walking across the lot to the front gates of the academy. I looked perfect, just like every other day. Girls swarmed around me, flirting with me whenever they got the chance; it was another school day.
I couldn't resist writing a dark story about ItaSasu. I wanted to post what I have so far to get a reaction and some much-needed feedback. In other words, I really need reviews to know how I'm doing. I don't have a lot written. What I have posted is all I have so far.
Reviews are loverly!