Flashbacks are in italics


"Phil, I…"

"Let me guess" Phil cut in, staring at the redhead sitting awkwardly on the bed, "you're sorry about what happened, you can't help how you feel and to add the cherry to the perfectly baked cake that is your alibi you think we should just stay friends?"

Amy looked away but was quick to regain her composure.

"Phil, I came here to tell you that I still care for, but…"

"But?" The straightedge superstar asked, taking a seat beside Amy on the bed and gently placing his tattooed hand over hers. Amy looked into his warm eyes that were gazing into her own.

"But not like I used to…" Amy concluded. Phil immediately diverted his gaze trying to hide the pain behind his eyes. Swiftly, the Chicago native pulled away his hand and stood up, turning his back to the former women's champion.

"Phil, you know you'll always have a special place in my heart but I think we both know who that belongs to. I mean, I love what we had, what we had was love but…I guess I've always known deep down that I love Adam…But, that doesn't mean I don't love you Phil, cos I do. It's just not the way I love Adam."

Amy paused and waiting for a reaction, when there wasn't she continued.

"Phil you gotta understand that I still want to hold you close to me cos frankly I can't imagine being without you and that may sound cheesy but you're my best friend. I'm willing to wait forever to have you back because Phil, you're a huge part of my life and well…I want you- no, I need you to be there because no-one else can hold that part of my heart, not even Adam…Just, please come back. I'm sorry if I ever hurt you."

Amy concluded, standing up. She looked up at the raven-haired superstar who kept his gaze on the window, not once turning back to look at Amy. Minutes ticked by with Amy desperately waiting for a response from Phil.

He sighed and turned around to look at his ex-girlfriend. Amy gasped slightly as she saw a tear run down from Phil's bloodshot eyes, part of her wanted to run over and comfort him but her mind reminded her that that wouldn't help either him or her.

"But I…I love you, Ames."

Amy shut her eyes, trying the shield the impending tears, this was so hard for her and it was going to be so hard on him. She looked back up to Phil who now refused to move until her reply.

"I can't hurt you anymore…Phil. I'm so sorry."

And with her apology, the redhead ran out of the room sniffing back sobs as she did. No part of her wanted to return to her room; she just…needed some time alone.

Phil fell down onto the bed, keeping his gaze to the floor. He watched as his vision blurred and then blinked for the tears to escape his eyes. This couldn't be happening again…

"Baby, I might as well bring the popcorn if you're gonna drive way out there…No, it's not a problem and you know how much I'm looking forward to this…Ok? Ok, gotta go, wish me luck. Love ya!" Phil smiled as he chattered away on the phone before snapping it shut and grinning.

John Hennigan, better known by his ring name John Morrison smiled as he spotted one of his best friends yapping away on the phone. John assumed Phil was talking to Amy. After all, nobody else would make Phil so happy that he would actually try harder not to hurt John in a match.

"You are so whipped, Punk!" Mike Mizanin, better known by his ring name The Miz said as he appeared from behind John who jumped slightly but was thankful that neither Phil nor Mike noticed.

"I'm not the one who's whipped Mike. Last I remember, you were the one who left John's party early because Kelly needed her beauty sleep." Phil retorted, knowing full well that Mike would succumb to all of Kelly Kelly's* demands. He followed her around like a lost puppy against Kelly will.

Mike blushed slightly which caused John to chuckle.

"Well I'm not the one who spent five hours shopping with Melina just so she could have a good bikini for the contest! Which she didn't even win!" Mike blurted out angrily. This caused the former Intercontinental Champion to cease his laughter and glare at Mike. As the both stared daggers into each other, Phil started laughing loudly causing both men to turn and look at him.

"Damn…You guys are right, I am so completely whipped." Phil continued chuckling as both the other men dropped their glares and started laughing.

"So how are you and Amy doing?" Mike asked inquisitively. He always had a secret crush on the former women's champion and when he glimpsed the redhead giving the Chicago native a good ol' smooch a few months prior, he almost collapsed at the sight. Soon after, he pulled Phil away and found out the entire story, burning in envy at the fact that it was him who dragged Phil to the bar in which he met the former Diva.

"Fine and no, you're not going to get any juicy details." Phil answered, smiling at Mike's predictability. Phil glimpsed the tiniest of frowns on Mike lips before it curved to a cocky smile.

"Come on, Phil. Just tell us how good Li-Amy is in the sack just so we can see if she's better than Kelly, you know, like a past vs. present Diva competition." Mike begged causing only Phil to snigger.

"Do it for past Diva's everywhere, Phil." John added. Phil straightened up and stopped laughing. He glanced from left to right, making so no-one was eavesdropping then gestured John and Mike to come closer, both men with huge grins on their faces at the thought that they were going to hear of the beautiful redhead's sexual endeavours.

"Well…Amy does like to try this thing…" Phil whispered causing both other men to lean in closer, "She get's this…Oh! Hey Melina! Kelly!"

Both ECW superstars spun around, their eyes wide with fear at the sight of their girlfriends. When all they saw was an empty hallway with a few boxes, they turned back around to Phil who was in clutching his stomach whilst laughing uncontrollably.

Mike face was burning red whilst John was still regaining composure.

"Not funny, Punk!" The self-proclaimed chick magnet shouted to Phil who had already turned his back to them and was heading down the hallway. Phil waved to Mike, still laughing uncontrollably.

The redhead rushed out of the hotel room as silently as she could. She hoped nobody would be bursting out of nowhere to surprise her or ask her for an autograph, especially not when she was crying buckets and she still had a massive black eye.

She pulled her hotel room key out of her pocket and rushed into her room. Thankfully, Adam had taken her to his room the night prior and her room was isolated from anyone else.

Sobbing quietly, the redhead shut the door and slid down it, memories and flashbacks running through her mind.

Amy jumped up as she heard the sound of skin to wood from the door. She bolted to the door in record time. When she opened the door she immediately adopted a disgruntled face.

"Oh…It's just you Phil…" The redhead turned on her heel and headed back into the living room.

"Hey now wait a second!" Phil shouted chasing Amy into the house. They ran into the living room where Phil jumped over Amy's plush couch and grabbed her by the waist. Amy, still giggling like a schoolgirl tilted her head upwards to look at the Chicago native's face.

Phil grinned as he let go of one of the redhead's wrists and reached to tuck in a loose strand of her hair. As he did, Amy grabbed his hand, slowly moving it aside. Neither of them spoke as Phil leaned in closer to Amy and gradually, the lover's lips met softly but passionately kissing, making up for all the lost time between them.

When they broke apart to catch a breath, Phil placed a hand on Amy's cheek.

"I missed you."

Amy looked lovingly into his eyes, they were a dark shade of brown. As she blinked, the brown in his eyes were replaced with an all too familiar forest green, the redhead blinked again but only saw the brown staring down at her quizzically.

"Come on. I'll go make the popcorn…"

Phil said, standing up. However, Amy was still transfixed by the flashback of her ex-beau's eyes. She sighed, it had been happening a lot, she had been having a normal conversation with Phil and suddenly a memory of Adam would pop into her head and to make matters worse it had been happening on a more usual basis given the circumstances with Adam and Vickie…

Amy rubbed her eyes, hoping it would all go away but she knew it wouldn't…it was something she would have to live with.

Phil punched a pillow. God, why did the redhead have to capture his heart so carelessly and tear it just as hastily? It almost killed him the first time…

"I'm so sorry, Phil…"

The redhead barged out of the house, leaving nothing but a cheap excuse and an apology that meant nothing. He was frozen, shocked, rooted to the ground. He handy moved an inch and only guessed that he hadn't blinked.

He really didn't understand. The only question was 'Why?'

Why would she choose to hurt him so badly with an excuse as fake as 'I don't love you anymore' and some lies about their schedule? Why would she suddenly have this epiphany? Why did it start bothering her now? Why would she turn her back on months and months of nothing but love?


Amy's loud sobs continued. She never meant to hurt Phil as much as she did. The first time was so hard for her, she could bare staying with Phil and imagining Adam in his place. The constant flashbacks of Adam during Amy's time with Phil, his kisses, his tenderness, his lovemaking would all haunt her…Phil deserved someone who loved him, not someone who would use him.

The redhead rushed out of the Chicago house, rain drenching her clothes. She knew her excuse was half-hearted but her meeting with Adam made her realise that she would always love Adam, no matter what. She didn't deserve Phil…She didn't deserve anyone.

The straightedge superstar turned over again, shuddering as he relived the memories of his first break-up with Amy.

Phil sat up from the couch, his head in his hands. Amy's blatant apology running through his head as if it was some masochistic torture. As if he were possessed, the raven-haired man stood up and walked to the kitchen but before he could open up the fridge he reminded himself who he was and also remembered that he had no actual alcohol in his house.

He could always just go to a bar but no…he didn't want to see anyone…ever. Casually, as if nothing had ever happened, Phil strolled into the bathroom and looked around until the gleaming metal object caught his eye.

With a clear swipe, Phil eyed the red blood oozing from his arm. He looked at it and touched it as if it were some foreign substance. The pain suddenly hit him but he didn't care. He had control over this pain unlike the pain that was left unmatched in his heart.

Another clear swipe and another line of blood. Phil exhaled shakily, he actually felt better,, he forgot about Amy and everyone else as the red substance splashed in little drops on the floor. It gave him a sense of calm, a break from the depression and anger in his heart. For only a moment, he forgot about the emotion pain and focused on the sting of the razor slicing his skin.

He wasn't one to do this but without Amy, he didn't feel like himself anymore…

Phil turned over in his bed bringing his wrists to his eyes. The scars were still there, as if a permanent reminder of how he escaped his pain. Sitting up, the raven-haired superstar wiped away his tears as he headed for the bathroom once again…


*I chose not to use her real name because I keep laughing as I type it and therefore we would get nowhere with this chapter…

A/N: Sorry again. I can't stress that enough. Thank you so much for everything and Read and review!

BTW, I'm working on new stories and faster chapter updates so sorry again!

PS. Sorry if this was a bit depressing.