I haven't updated for over 2 months… that makes me feel like such a bad guy!! I officially HATE myself for doing this to you, and I really, really, really hope it doesn't happen again. :(

Wow, the replies to reviewers are gonna be more words than the actual story!! Here goes…

Tsukiko Hizami- Naoki-: Thank you for reviewing!! I really appreciate it :) I'm sorry it took me ages to carry on! And thanks for telling me about her real name, I might make it so she's one of those middle name people, she can be called Theresa Annabelle but prefer her middle name :D

Trish: Of course you can do those songfics!! I look forward to reading them :D Glad you liked the story and what happened to Gretchen, Gus & Libby- I'm happy for them too :) Thanks for reviewing! To find out what happens to TJ and Spin, read on…

Lilia-Rose: I love the pairing of Gretchen and Gus! Most people on fanfic prefer Gretchen/Vince, and I like that pairing too, but I just think there's something so sweet about Gretchen and Gus. :) And I love Libby too! She's my favourite OC. Glad you like the story, thanks for reviewing! Sorry it took so long to update, I hope it doesn't happen again.

have-a-cookie: Woo! I think Gus and Gretchen have deserved happiness for a long time :) Stupid, stupid teachers, I hate homework full stop, it's bad enough in term time but the holidays?! It's just child cruelty! Anyway, thank you for your review, sorry I've taken ages to update!

GreenandPurpleMonkeys: Thank you very much for your review, I'm glad you like my story :) I'm sorry it's taken me so long to update!

SweetWildThang: Thanks for reviewing! Glad you like the story, sorry the update was so long :( Enjoy the chapter!

lozzard-wellard: Thanks for reviewing! I love Cornchip Girl too :D And where would I be without my problem child daughter of a carpet lover? Lmao :P Glad you like the story :D

shana852963: You're welcome :D I'm really happy for Libby as well! I love Libby and I felt really happy when I was writing it :D Thanks for reviewing, glad you like it!! :D

spamisthename: Will Spinelli and TJ work it out? Ahh, that would be telling ;) Lol, thanks for the review, glad you're liking the story :D

KenjiFinster: Again, thanks for the name. I live in England and they don't really show Recess that much over here, and when they do, it's the same episodes over and over again. I haven't seen the army/navy one in ages, and it's not on YouTube (I wish it was because I love it!) But thanks for the review, glad you like the story :D

abby: I'll look it up when I can remember :D Thanks for reviewing, glad you like it! I'm really happy for Gus, Gretchen & Libby and I'm really glad people like them because Gretchen/Gus isn't as common as Gretchen/Vince and I didn't know how people would react. Hope you enjoy this chapter!

Sarina Blade: I quite like odd pairings :P Thanks for reviewing, I'm especially glad you liked the bit with Gretchen and Gus :D Enjoy this chapter!

Neviegirl: Thanks for the review! I'm glad you like the story and sorry I didn't update sooner. Enjoy this chapter!

idoloveyou: Yup, Gus was a bit of a jerk at first lol, I loved making him sweet :D Mikey isn't dead yet, he's just in a coma, whether or not he does die well, you will find out ;) But not in this chapter as this is a big TJ/Spin chapter!! :D Thanks for the review, glad you like the story!

mad-sugar-but-sweet: Gotta love the angst, lol :D Thanks for reviewing, glad you like the story!! Sorry I didn't update for ages, enjoy this chapter, hope it makes up for me abandoning everyone for ages:)

aussiechick00: I think Cornchip Girl was a bit younger, she always looked younger and in the episode where it's picture day she gets dirty with the other younger ones before the fourth graders have their picture taken :) Thanks for the review, glad you like the story :D

Jayla Starlight: Haha, I don't mind at all about your long, rambling review, it makes me feel special and loved!! :D Lol, nice to have a Recess character who isn't completely different! And it's about time some people got happy endings lol :P OMG Recess characters in real life would be SO AWESOME!!!!! I would LOVE to have Mikey as a best friend and TJ as a boyfriend, and it would be awesome to have two random guys digging massive holes in your school grounds :P I can remember 3 episodes with Kurst the Worst in- there's one that's focused around her and Mikey making friends, and then she has smaller appearances in the episode with Lawson and his crew (she's in Lawson's crew) and in 'The Girl Was Trouble' (she has a food fight with Gretchen.) Anyway, thanks for reviewing, I'm really glad you like my story! :D

OnlyANorthenSong: Thanks for reviewing!! Yeah, I felt like that after I started reading Recess fanfics- I was really into it when I was 8 or 9 and to read all the fanfics and watch all the episodes was just amazing :) Sorry it took me so long to update, I'm glad you like the story! :D

Forgetful Love: It ended there because I am a very evil person who likes to keep my readers hanging on… lol :P I had NO IDEA you'd be in suspense for 2 months, so I'm sorry about that :( There are some amazing Recess fics out there, try Hooked On You by Jayla Starlight or Recess Drama by shana852963, but pretty much everything in the Recess fandom is amazing and makes a really good read. :D Thanks for reviewing! :D

Isa-BELLA-Swan91: Thanks for reviewing! I love that there are so many people who are reading Recess fanfics for the first time because Recess is an amazing show, and there are some great stories on this fandom :D I agree completely about the drama, without drama things would just be too boring and too much like real life! Lol :P Enjoy this chapter!

Long Story: It's amazing how many people there are who don't want Spinelli to die lol, I'm sure Spinelli would feel very loved if she knew about it :) Thanks for the review, glad you like the story!

0-Royal-T-0: Stupid school!! Haha if there was no school I'd probably sit and read fanfics all day too… and it would probably be better for my education :P Sorry for not updating for 2 months, and thanks for reviewing! :D

kat: Thanks for the review! Glad you like the story. I didn't used to take so long to update, so don't worry, there hopefully won't be 2 month gaps in between every chapter. Enjoy this chapter!

friends and p-f4ever: I will definitely finish this story, I hate leaving stories unfinished. I don't know when I'm going to finish it but I think it will be quite soon, I think I'm only going to write one or two more chapters. Thanks for reviewing!

child who is cool: Thanks for reviewing! I'm really glad you like the story, and sorry it took me so long to update. Enjoy the chapter!

Rika24: Sorry updating took me so long! Glad you like the story, thanks for reviewing :D

twistedsister emogirl: Congratulations for being the 100th review!!!! :D Thanks for reviewing, I'm sorry I didn't update for ages :(

sassybutt32: Lol, I like changing the characters, it's fun, especially when people really don't expect it :D Thanks for reviewing, glad you like the story!

J.C.: Hopefully you will enjoy this chapter seeing as it is all about TJ and Spinelli :D Thanks for reviewing, glad you like the story!

TJ jumped into his car, slamming the door behind him. As he revved the engine up, he noticed his hands were shaking with anger. TJ turned his radio up to full volume, not even noticing that it was tuned into a station where two men with dull, monotone voices droned on about politics. Usually TJ point blank refused to listen to anything other than screamo, but today was different.

It was only when TJ was out of the hospital parking lot when he realised he didn't have a clue where Spinelli now lived. If she was in her old house, TJ would have known, as he'd only lived a few doors down from her. As far as he knew, her dad still lived there anyway.

TJ thought he might as well knock on the door and ask Spinelli's father; he would know. All he had to do was hope he wasn't at work.

TJ drove into his street and parked on Bob Spinelli's drive. He walked up and hammered hard on the door, completely ignoring the doorbell.

The door was answered by a woman. Everything about this woman looked completely fake; from her bright orange skin to her huge boobs. The woman smiled, and it was obvious her face had been botoxed.

TJ frowned, he had never seen this woman before.

"Hi," she said, "Can I help you?"

"Where does Spinelli live?"

The woman looked blank. "Spinelli?"

"Ashley Mills."

"Oh! You mean Robert's adorable little daughter? She only lives a few streets away from here."

TJ almost grinned at the thought of how Spinelli would have reacted if she'd heard whoever this lady was calling her 'adorable,' but then his anger raged again, meaning he could focus on the directions the woman was giving him to Spinelli's house.

"Thanks," TJ said, walking briskly back to his car, fists still clenched.

He followed the woman's instructions and ended up in another familiar street, though he couldn't remember why it was familiar. The woman had told him she lived at number 47, so he found it and parked his car on the driveway. He got out of his car, slamming the door behind him again.

He stormed up the drive and hammered on the door.

"Just a minute!" A voice from the other side of the door said.

Spinelli's voice.

Then she answered the door, wearing a red silk dressing gown. Her short black hair looked wet; it was evident she'd just come out of the shower or bath.

"TJ?" She said, looking puzzled and a bit nervous as TJ pushed past her into her entrance hall, slamming the front door. "What are you doing here?"

"I think you know why… Spinelli."

Ashley stood staring at him in shock. No. How the hell did he find out?

Ashley focused on fixing her face into confusion, although she knew it was too late; she knew TJ knew from the kiss and the stony anger on his face.

"Don't you dare try to lie to me about it!!" TJ yelled, "don't you think you've already lied to me enough for all these years??!!"

"TJ," Ashley said, "I can explain…"

"I… DON'T… NEED… YOUR… EXCUSES!!!!!" TJ said, picking up a plant pot and hurling it across the room. It hit a window and smashed it. Ashley jumped as she heard the deafening smash. TJ was so angry Ashley could see the temple throbbing in his head.

Suddenly Ashley's shock and fear turned to anger; how dare TJ turn up at her house, not listen to her and start wrecking everything? "You can pay for everything you break."

TJ seized Ashley's wrists. "It's YOU who will pay!!"

"What have I done wrong?"

"You know what!!" TJ roared, banging Ashley's head against the wall. Ashley groaned in pain, the tears stinging in her dark eyes.

"But… I… don't!!" Ashley said, and TJ put one arm tightly around her neck, choking her and dragging her backwards, her heels scraping against the laminate flooring.

"I DON'T WANNA HEAR IT!!" TJ was getting a thrilling feeling from seeing Ashley in pain. All the anger that had been building up and up inside of him like a monster over the past few years was finally being released on someone who, in his opinion, one hundred per cent deserved him. He had been so hurt by her, and now he was finally getting his own back.

"You're going to!" Ashley snapped, spluttering- TJ's grip around her neck was like iron. "My parents… divorced… Mom took me… it was… very sudden…"

"So?! You should have called! You should have wrote! You should have emailed! You should have at least let us know!!"

"I couldn't!"

"Why?" TJ had pushed Ashley onto the floor now. She was cowering in a corner, moaning in pain while he kicked her hard and stomped on her stomach.

"Because… because… because… BECAUSE I HAVE LEUKEMIA!!"

TJ suddenly stopped, the words struggling to register in his mind.



Why Spinelli? When she was so good? So kind? Such a good friend? Always so tough, but never a bully, always there to stand up and protect those younger and more vulnerable?

Then why was he doing this to her?

"You can't be serious."

"I am."

"God, no."

"I'm sorry."

"Sorry??!!" TJ was confused. Why was she sorry? What had she done wrong? TJ was sure she hadn't asked to have leukaemia.

"I should have told you," Ashley said, the tears pouring down her cheeks. TJ sat down beside her and put a hand on her shoulder, but Ashley flinched and shuffled away. TJ hung his head, feeling guilty and ashamed: he'd really hurt Ashley, and now he was certain she would never trust him again.

"When did you find out?" TJ asked, and Ashley was surprised at how calm and gentle his voice was.

"Fifth grade." Ashley said. "My parents… I guess they blamed each other. After my diagnosis, they argued every night, which led to the split. It was so sudden- my mom just ran down the stairs and told me to pack my bags. I wanted to say goodbye but I didn't get the chance."

TJ stared at the floor, not knowing what to say. Nothing he could say could make it better. Nothing he could say could make him forgive himself.

"Why, TJ?" Ashley said. "You used to be the nicest, sweetest, most thoughtful, lovely guy I knew. Why did you do this to me?"

"You broke my heart." Those four words seemed pathetic now. They seemed no excuse to put Ashley through all that pain. TJ clenched his fists, but the anger was only at himself- how could he act like such a monster before even hearing Ashley's side of the story?

"Oh… you mean…" Ashley started, and TJ nodded. "That night… when I told you how I felt. The night before you disappeared."

Ashley sighed. "I'd love to have told you the truth."

TJ's eyes lit up. "The truth?"

Ashley nodded slowly. "The truth… is that I love you. I always have, and I always will."

"Then… why didn't you tell me that?" TJ said. "If you'd just told me how you really felt back then, then we could have been so happy-"

"No we wouldn't. Because either way, I would have had to leave that night."

"But… you made me think… that I wasn't good enough for you… that you didn't love me… and that made me so angry…"

"I didn't want to tell any of you, because I didn't want to hurt you," Ashley said, sighing- it looked like her plan hadn't worked. Either way, she'd done the thing she wanted to do least- which was hurt TJ. "I knew that if I told you the truth about my leukaemia, you would have all worried about me, so that's why I told no one. And what if I'd gone out with you, TJ? And I'd died? What would you have done then?"

"I really don't know," TJ said, biting his lip. "Spin, I can't even imagine my life without you in it anymore- and you've only been back in it since today. I've already lost you once. I don't want to lose you again."

TJ heard a sigh and an almost inaudible murmur, that sounded like, "you'll have to."

TJ's face screwed up in confusion. "I don't understand."

"TJ," said Ashley, taking TJ's hand and giving it a squeeze, "I could die at any time… and I will."

Again, I'm sorry if that wasn't worth the wait.

Over 100 reviews? WOW!! I REALLY didn't see that one coming. Thank you so much to all my amazing reviewers, I love every single one of you :)

And secondly, I hope you all had a good Christmas! :D