Disclaimer: I do not own Law and Order: Criminal Intent.
Summary: Post Blind Spot. Eames starts to confront her demons.
Author's Note: Hasn't been beta'd. I hope you enjoy. Also I couldn't remember the exact name of Eames' bird so can someone confirm it? Anyway once again, enjoy!
He had realised that bringing her back was the worst and best possible thing.
After a few days in hospital after being abducted by Jo Gage, Eames had fought to get out. Bobby was half inclined to bribe the doctors to keep her in, keep her safe, but he knew it was pointless. He saw the way she flinched when she heard the curtains close, the way she warily eyed needles or anything sharp in nature, and the way she tensed when she woke up and tried to figure out who was holding her hand.
It was also the little things. Like how whenever she awoke she looked around the room, and the moment he entered the room he saw her breathe a sigh of relief. It was the way she wanted him to talk to her constantly until she fell asleep.
He knew the hospital wasn't going to improve Eames anymore, she was healed physically but not mentally, and he knew this would be the hardest healing. She wasn't one to show weakness, she would try to be strong, and push it aside. Though she had said she'd confronted it, he knew she hadn't.
Still time would tell he supposed.
They drove through the streets of Rockaway in the SUV, Eames completely silent. He found himself rambling off random facts in an attempt to make her smile, but she didn't. She just sat there fidgeting slightly with her bag, watching the road.
He pulled up outside her house and said softly, "We don't have to go in,"
She glared at him, "Goren it's just a house,"
He sighed, and watched as she got out.
He followed her, careful to not crowd her too much. She was tensing, and she was breathing deeper, trying to calm herself. She reached her door, and he watched carefully, seeing how she hesitated to put her key in the door.
"Eames..." he started to say but she shook her head.
"Shut it Goren,"
She put her key in and unlocked the door. She entered confidently, head held high, a fake smile on her face. He followed her into the living room, still waiting for a clear sign of distress. She turned to him and said, "Told you so,"
He didn't reply, knowing that when she said it, she meant it for herself. She was reassuring herself, telling herself she was okay.
She nodded, and turned back to her living room. He watched as she took it all in, and as she froze as she saw her empty bird cage. He swore, as she started to hyperventilate, stumbling back, crashing into him. He held her up so she wouldn't collapse, but his grip sent tremors in her body, and she stamped down on his foot, trying to get free.
He instantly let her go and said, "Eames it's me..."
She turned to him, shaking, and he stepped forward as her knees gave away, holding her. This time she didn't struggle, but allowed him to hug her, burying her head against his chest. He slowly guided her to the floor, propping her against the wall, allowing her to fall against him.
He stroked her head, his heart freezing as she sobbed.
"Polly..." she said softly, "She killed Polly,"
He nodded silently.
"Polly, Joe gave him to me..." she murmured, "I just...he's just a bird..."
"He isn't just a bird," he said softly, knowing that this was her way to recover, her way to confront it.
"He is...I should've protected him, he was just an innocent bird," she said, "Polly..."
It was completely irrational but he couldn't help but draw the similarities between Eames and Polly, and him and Eames. Eames could've been like Polly, she could be dead. He understood how she felt responsible in a way even though she shouldn't. Unlike him, who was the cause of Eames abduction, the cause of Polly's death.
He pulled her closer and said calmly, "There wasn't anything you could've done Eames,"
"You did something," she said stubbornly, "Why not Polly?"
He didn't know how to respond. He wanted to say something comforting; he wanted her not to worry. He just wanted her to be happy again, and not like this. But he didn't have a clue, not a complete clue.
He glanced at the cage, and sighed, "I don't know Eames,"
He half expected her to start punching him or something, to rant at him, but she didn't. She just sat there holding onto him. She whispered softly, "Will you stay?"
And then her body relaxed, as she slowly began to fall asleep.