Type of Edward: Office Edward
Character type: OOC
Story type: All Human
POV: Edward POV
Ok, so I maaay have a slight TwilightBostonLegal fetish and maaaybe I want to see Bella and Edward as lawyers bonking each other. Is that so wrong? :)
And you cannot hide or ever put it away
Something glorious is about to happen
Bloc Party – Positive Tension
In the last ten years, I have become a success.
Not that I had ever really fallen into the loser type to begin with. No, nature had blessed me with a win in the genetic lottery, and if my good looks hadn't pushed me over the line in life, my father's bank balance would've. Edward Cullen was born lucky (a phrased hissed quite spitefully at me once by an ex-girlfriend), but the last ten years have been somewhat different, much more special to me, a hard won achievement as I survived the rocky road to partnership at Cullen and Hale.
Luck (as I spat back at said girlfriend) has nothing to do with it really, oh yes, I've had access to the best schools money can buy, good cars, bad girls; but in the end, I am a hard worker, and I like to believe that I have earned every merit of my position by my own volition. Hard work, I have always believed, is very, very important.
This is why my co-worker cum best friend Emmett McCartney immediately knew that something was wrong when he walked unannounced into my corner office and found me staring idly out of a window, humming softly to myself.
"Dude." He told me unhelpfully. "Just ask her out already."
The fact that Emmett had managed to successfully deduce the source of my distraction was not a comment on his talents of perceptiveness, Emmett was not particularly perceptive; smart, in his way, but unusually boneheaded. It was I who was just painfully transparent.
Through the frosted glass wall of my office, I could see the figure of my distraction. If I listened hard enough (and I did most days), I could hear the tinkling sound of her laughter.
I sighed and lay back into my office chair.
"Just ask her out."
This brought me to the crux of my problem, a problem that every day Emmett gave me a solution to and everyday I ignored.
Smart, beautiful, funny and totally, utterly out of my league: Bella Swan.
She really was beautiful, and not in the way women look after three hours of primping and a shot of Botox. Bella had the classic features of a young Audrey Hepburn, the straight nose, plump lips that seemed to be permanently stained a soft, kissable pink, long mahogany hair that swayed past her shoulders.
Yes, Bella was certainly nice to look at with her subtle curves and sparkling brown eyes, but she was also a lot more then that. She was it seemed important to note, my colleague at Cullen and Hale. Technically my inferior in fact, considering I was (again, technically) her boss. I tried not to think about that too often, she was already unattainable; it was not necessary to torture my poor addled imagination any more.
She had arrived at the firm fresh from Harvard and immediately impressed my own superior Carlisle with her near-genius knowledge of law, coupled with an ability to go after a desired result with the ferocity of a pit bull. I can recall (although not with out some pretty instrumental bodily changes) the first moment I saw her sashay into the boardroom on her first day, the room had become very warm as I watched the beautiful women cross the room and introduce herself, and I distinctly remember not being able to get up for another good fifteen minutes after she had left. I have not been able to remove her from my consciousness since, it had, in fact, become worse with every encounter we share, admitting that those are relatively few and far between.
Meanwhile Bella has enjoyed a very successful career with Cullen and Hale, so I doubt Carlisle will make me suffer her loss any time soon.
Everyday I prepared for a new day at the firm, preparing to watch Bella from afar. Lust after her, think about her, dream about her- but I rarely spoke to her, laughed with her as Alice, Jasper, Emmett and Rose had managed to do. I am, in short, pathetic. Crippled entirely by my worship of her.
Which brings me back to my original point that Bella is so far out my league I might as well be playing little league and watching her play the pros. To continue with the baseball analogy, she is far, far out of my ballpark. Not because I lack the tick in the usual boxes girls need ticking, I've never had trouble in that area. I am good looking and I am wealthy and I am successful and I have no real aversion to commitment when it came down to the right girl (although that category was looking pretty lonely at the moment), but in end I was just another stuffy, boring executive. Bella, beautiful, enigmatic, brilliant Bella deserved, and would want, more.
I turned to Emmett with a sigh. Emmett smiled at me playfully, and placed a very delicate origami swan in front of me. A lovely gesture, if it hadn't been made with my case report.
"I'm her boss." I told him, pushing the swan neatly into my waste paper basket with one hand. "It's just a crush. I'll get over it."
"Edward?" He asked me patiently. "How long has Bella been with this firm?"
I pursed my lips in embarrassment. This was not an uncommon conversation for me to be having with Emmett; in fact it seemed to occur in some variation, every other day.
"About a year and a half." I answered reluctantly.
"And how long have you been totally head over heels in love with her."
I didn't answer. Emmett already knew. I had been in love with Bella Swan for exactly that time, minus forty-five minutes or so, and Emmett knew that.
Emmett jumped to his feet with a grin. He had no problem with my reluctance to sort out my Bella problem; it was all very entertaining for him.
"Whatever man." He said. "I came here to warn you that you'll have to be in a confined space with her in an hour. Carlisle wants you both on the Baldwin Case."
I groaned. That sounded like a very awkward and painful experience.
"Thanks Emmett." I said with a sigh.
He walked out of my office, whistling cheerily. As the door opened and closed I heard the soft melodic sound of Bella Swan talking with one of the receptionists.
I groaned once more and went back to pretending to work.
Carlisle waved to me as I walked in, his sunny demeanour in direct contrast to the coolness of my own. I nodded, frowning as I looked around and failed to see Bella.
"Where's Swan?" I asked in my best disaffected professional tone.
I was five minutes late, and Bella seemed to be very good at being punctual.
"Oh, I asked her to come a little late." Carlisle explained, waiting politely for me to seat myself into my chair. "I wanted to ask you about how you felt about Bella."
I blinked. Had Emmett let something slip? Had Alice? Alice was sure to know, and she was Carlisle's daughter. She was also Bella's best friend, if Alice knew then… I couldn't follow that train of thought, it was too potentially mortifying. Instead I decided to prioritise, and panic about the situation at hand.
"W-what?" I spluttered.
Carlisle looked at me strangely.
"How do you think she's fitting in at Cullen and Hale? I'm thinking about putting her on the partner track…"
"Oh…" I breathed in relief. "I agree. She's a very good lawyer."
"And a lovely person." Carlisle said with a smile. "It's so rare to see that kind of humility in a women of her success. I think she's a brilliant addition to our team."
Carlisle was, by anybody's definition, a good boss. My mentor had a keen eye for raising stars in their professions, and I had no doubt that Bella would live up to his expectations. I groaned silently, both blissful and dismayed that I may have to deal with my unrequited love for the rest of my career.
We both started as a knock sounded on Carlisle's door. He indicated with one hand for Bella to enter, smiling at her in a fatherly way. He was very fond of Bella Carlisle, another reason why he could never, under any circumstances, find out about my… affinity for her.
She knocked the breathe out of me as walked into the room. Her long legs hidden only slightly under a short skirt that teased the male anatomy by ending half way down her delectable thighs. She stood at about 5'8, her delicate feet encased in what I could only assume were very expensive high heels. She was, like many at the firm, a well-dressed student of the Alice school of fashion. I thanked the militant little imp in my head, as I leaned back to subtly appreciate her handiwork.
"Hey Carlisle." She greeted breathlessly. She looked at me and smiled shyly. "Hi Edward."
I swallowed and smiled back.
She sat gracefully beside me, despite her occasional tendency to trip over air.
"How are you?" Bella asked me.
My heart thudded erratically as her brown eyes looked intently into mine.
well." I replied honestly. "And you?"
"Ok." She smiled wearily. "Nothing a good nights sleep wouldn't handle."
I frowned slightly. I had been noticing a slight haggardness to her features of late, but had shrugged it off as his usual obsessing over her welfare. Was she sick?
Another alternative occurred to me that made my heart drop into my stomach, and I hoped to god that she wasn't loosing sleep because she was pursuing… other opportunities.
"Perhaps you would prefer to take a few days off." Carlisle said anxiously. "I can get Jasper to cover for you."
Bella looked panicked for a moment.
"No!" She said quickly. "It's nothing like that. I'll be fine."
"If you're sure."
"I am." Bella said firmly.
"Ok…" Carlisle said, his face creasing slightly in an expression of discontent. "If you're sure I want you and Edward to work together for this case. The Baldwin's are big clients of ours, and you guys are good. I know you haven't worked together very much since Bella has come to this company, but I'd like to see you both together more frequently as of this moment."
I shifted, rearranging my pants as they suddenly became strangely uncomfortable. As Carlisle talked, oblivious of his connotations, my eyes shifted to Bella's, who, to my surprise, was staring at me with a strange blazing expressing.
She flushed as our eyes met, and quickly she looked away.
I thought of the male's locker room at the gym, my grandmother, and Lauren Mallory, my college girlfriend.
"That's fine." I said evenly.
"Marcos Baldwin wants this case handled as quietly and as quickly as possible. " Carlisle told us.
"I would too if I was charged with embezzlement." Bella said dryly.
I chuckled at her comment and Carlisle smiled wanly.
"Yes, be that as it may, I trust you both to do your best to win this case."
"Of course." I said as Bella nodded.
"Good." Carlisle said, his smile widening. "Well that's all then. Report back to me next week, and I'll expect a full statement and your notes."
"Thanks Carlisle." Bella said softly. She glanced at me. "I'll walk you out Edward."
I nodded silently. Hoping that my pathetic joy was not blatantly and embarrassingly obvious.
We both urged Carlisle goodbye, and quietly, we walked side by side down the gilded hallways of Cullen and Hale. I focused on breathing, my heart rate doing a kamikaze dance of elation.
"Well…" She said frankly. "It shouldn't be too hard to reach a deal, most of this evidence is pretty circumstantial."
"He circumstantially shredded a quarter of a tonne of paper work." I replied. "That's going to be hard to get the mediator to ignore."
Bella shrugged, grinning slyly.
"I have faith in our combined legal abilities."
I watched her lips move absently; distracted by the sensual way her soft pink lips moved to form words. I flushed slightly when I snapped out of my stupor, realising that I had been staring at her intently.
"Me too Bella. I look forward to working with you."
She motioned to the office we had stopped beside.
"Well this is my stop. I'll see you Edward."
"Should I ask for your number and kiss you goodnight?" I joked, and then realising what I had said, averted my eyes in embarrassment.
Bella had gone a deep red, she giggled uneasily.
"Oh Edward." She said softly. "Nobody gets to first base with me on the first date."
I grinned crookedly at her, waving her off as she disappeared into her office with an identical gesture.
Oh yes. This would be a good week.
"I can tell you what I would do with five hundred grand in hedged funds." Alice snorted as we walked towards our conference with prosecution. "-And it wouldn't be taking my mistress to a Las Vegas casino. Seriously these business types are painfully unoriginal."
Alice, despite the fact that she was Carlisle's daughter and by all rights should hold my own position, was not technically a full-fledged lawyer. Undeniably the girl did have a good handle on law, but unlike the rest of us, law for Alice was not her life and she was not willing to make it so. She had, in the ultimate act of defiance, added the Para to her title and came to work for Carlisle anyway.
Don't ask me to understand Alice, but she loved us and she loved Carlisle.
"I don't think Marcos Baldwin would understand the appeal of buying two or three thousand pairs of shoes."
Alice mimed hysterics and then gave me the evil eye.
Beside us Bella walked silently, looking over the case notes. I nudged her.
"Why so quiet?"
She looked up startled, calming as she registered my face.
"I guess I'm not used to working for the bad guy." Bella shrugged. "I feel like we should be sending Marcos to jail for fifteen years, not working him a deal."
"Guys like Marcos are our bread and butter." I said with a sigh. I too had a period of reconciliation with the fact we would occasionally be putting our scruples into a weekend home for the greater good. "It's not a great situation, but winning these cases means we can argue more pro bono cases for people who really need us."
Bella gave me an ironic little smile.
"Are you sure you want to be on this case?" I asked anxiously.
"No." Bella said with a sniff. "-But you don't have to worry about me loosing on purpose or anything. My competitive lawyer streak won't allow it."
Alice giggled at something.
"What?" I asked confused. Bella was shooting Alice a few nasty looks over her clipboard.
"I think that Bella is more worried about the prosecutor then the prosecution's case."
"Oh, shut up!" Bella snapped, turning her personable shade of red.
"Really?" I asked with a smirk. "Why is that, Miss Bella?"
Bella simply flushed a deeper burgundy, and Alice answered for her with a wicked grin.
"Bella used to date Mike Newton."
I forced myself not to tense up, succeeding only slightly. Biting the inside of my lip to withhold a blossoming growl of disapproval I raised my eyebrows.
"Date is a relative term," Bella said reluctantly, glaring at Alice. Alice winked back at her. "One date."
luuurrves you." Alice sang happily, dancing around her bemused best
friend. "Mike Newton wants to daaate you, he waaants to kiiiisss
He's not the only one, I thought wryly. I wanted desperately to ask if Bella returned my colleagues feelings but I resisted. I stifled a groan; of course it was Mike Newton. I absolutely despised Mike Newton and the feeling was fully mutual. Please, I begged god silently, do not let perfection personified Bella Swan end up with barely-passed-the-bar Mike Newton. If I was out of her league then Mike did not even inhabit the same solar system.
Bella, thankfully, seemed to agree. She rolled her eyes dispassionately at Alice.
We neared the door of the boardroom with various measures of relief. Unsurprisingly Mike Newton was waiting for us, and he waved cheerily at Bella as she entered.
"Hey Mike." She greeted softly. She glanced at me, giving me a look of discomfort.
I smiled back at her with what I hoped was reassurance. Her smile brightened, and my heart lifted.
Mike Newton proved the theory that looks really couldn't kill.
"Wow." Bella said as we walked out, sounding a little sickened. "I can't believe we did that."
"Sound happier." I advised. "You argued Marco's case well. We don't have to go to court. This is good."
"Tell that to the workers Baldwin stole money from."
I patted her on the back; feeling a little deflated myself (although that was probably because of the mountain of paper work we had to clear up).
"At times like this you just have to believe in the karmic circle. Douche bag parasites like Marco always get their comeuppance eventually. "
Bella stopped, teetering slightly on her heels. Her shoulder rose and fell in resignation.
"I know." Her bottom lips jutted out. "He was just so smug."
My nose puckered.
"I know. It probably wouldn't have helped our case if I had punched him out would it?"
Bella grinned and reached out to put a reassuring hand on my arm.
I glanced up with a smile, but it fell off my face as my eyes became caught in hers. Her brown eyes darkened with some ineffable emotion, and I felt myself inch closer to her. I wondered if perhaps her face was positioning itself with mine, as if…
She broke the moment suddenly, blinking as if awaking from a daze.
"Um, I really enjoyed working with you Edward."
Her voice seemed unnaturally high.
"Yeah." I tried to smile. "Me too."
"Well…" Bella procrastinated with an awkward smile. "I um, I better go. I have a lot of paper work to finish."
"Yeah me too."
She pivoted gracefully and began away. I watched her in dismay; my only chance to spend time with Bella was drawing all too quickly to a close. Had I imagined the moment we had shared just a moment ago?
"Bella?" I heard myself blurt out. Bella turned in surprise. "Do you want to do your paperwork in my office? We can keep each other company."
"Sure." Bella said, the corners of her mouth rising. "Sounds better then ordering Chinese and working along until all hours of the night."
"Oh." I said with a twisted grin. "We would still be ordering Chinese."
Bella smiled back, fiddling with the ends of her ponytail.
" Well of course."
"Most satisfying win?"
"Putting Tony Kabolos away." Bella answered automatically.
"The advertising executive who raped a sixteen year old girl? Yeah, I bet that was satisfying."
We had been in the office for hours, but I had barely felt the time pass. As we worked, we had kept up a comfortable conversation. I relished learning new things about Bella: that her favourite colour changed day to day (today it was green, although she refused to explain why), that her favourite movie was The Princess Bride, that she drove six hours once a month to visit her father.
"I can't take the credit." Bella continue, reaching up languidly and pulling the hair tie from her hair. "The SVU did most of the work."
I shook my head emphatically, slightly mesmerized by the sight of Bella shaking her hair out so that it fell in loose curls over her shoulders.
"I saw you argue that case. I was in court in one of the other rooms and I came and watched. You were brilliant."
Bella gazed at me intently, before looking away.
"You were there? I wish I'd seen you."
I swallowed slightly, although if it was because of the intimate setting my office had become, or the embarrassing hardening of certain body parts.
"I didn't want to distract you."
Bella laughed lightly.
"Edward." She told me tartly. "Don't be silly, I like being distracted by you."
Bella looked at me, all the more beautiful in the dim lighting of my office, her eyes dark with an emotion I had never dared to hope to see in her eyes. They seemed to burn softly, with some un-kept, visceral, wholly carnal heat.
Oh god, it occurred to me suddenly, she wanted me.
Bella Swan was sitting in my office, on my desk, wearing a short skirt and shirt low enough to show some cock hardening cleavage, giving me sex eyes. I couldn't help it. With out worrying about rejection or sexual harassment lawsuits, I leaned over and kissed her. She tasted warm, like cinnamon, and her lips were soft; but most importantly these perfect lips did not pull away, I felt, with elation, the soft pressure of response. Finally it was I who, reluctantly, broke the kiss. I looked at her timidly, checking for a reaction and almost afraid to find one.
Bella's pink tongue flicked out and wet her lips; slowly she looked me in the eye and grinned. Her hand entwined itself into my hair and Bella pulled me down for another light kiss, then two, then she looked me in the eye and bit her lip, smiling wickedly.
"Edward." She, honest to god, purred. "Is your door locked?"
I nodded numbly, still trying to wrap my head around this succubus, goddess, figure of perfection, wanting me.
"Good." She breathed, her face tipping. Every action was heavy with lust.
She kissed me again, but this kiss was not the relatively innocent variety we had shared before. Bella pushed me back, so I fell neatly into my plush office chair, and straddled my lap before quite politely sticking her tongue down my throat. I could not control my reaction; she seemed to release something very uncivilized, very animalistic, and very welcome inside me. The kiss was a battle for control, and Bella made sure to take advantage of every single one of her feminine wiles, her taut thighs gripping my own as she pressed herself into my lap. My hands gripped her hips firmly, and as we, for lack of a better term made out, I made sure she had a detailed awareness of my almost painful erection.
"I have wanted this for so long." I gasped as Bella pulled away. I groaned as she rubbed against my covered cock with an impish little giggle. "You have no idea Bella."
"Trust me." Bella said seriously. "I know."
She paused, and one dainty hand made its way contemplatively down my chest. Coyly she reached down and brushed her fingers against my hard on.
"And…" She continued in a voice that made me shiver in anticipation. "I intend on taking full advantage of the situation."
My zip was pulled open, and I remembered with equal measures of embarrassment and liberation that I had, in some strange moment of foreshadowing, decided to forego underpants today. She gasped slightly as I popped out of my confines.
"Oh…" She blushed scarlet when I looked at her curiously. "You're very… accomplished."
I laughed and captured her lips again, my hands moving up, seemingly of their own accord, and cupping her breasts. The hiss of pleasure that Bella emitted when I grasped them, almost made me cream right then.
"What do you want me to do?" I asked slyly, watching her eyelids flutter with arousal. "Tell me."
"Please Edward…" She panted as I applied more pressure to her breasts. "Touch me."
I didn't need any further encouragement as I pulled her shirt open, the popping of the buttons informing some absent part of my brain that it was now useless. I was not, however, paying attention to Bella's fashion choices when the milky white mounds of her breasts were revealed. Bella guided me to them in the shamelessness of the moment, and I nuzzled them, gently tracing their curves with my nose.
I kissed gently, the supple pinkness of her areola and she groaned again. She too, it seemed, had forgone the option of underwear this morning, and as she pressed her breasts headily into my face, I was eager to discover if this trend continued downstairs. My tongue traced lazy circles around her left nipple, enjoying the frequent cease it caused in her breathing. I nudged her nipple contemplatively, before my tongue flicked out to tease it. Bella's hands tightened in my hair, and her arousal was pressed into mine so that for the first time I could feel the wetness that had already gathered between her legs, against my bare, erect cock.
My fingers walked their way down her thigh, and I busied her mouth as they disappeared tentatively under her bunched up skirt. I gargled in intense, ball clenching desire as my fingertips met with the moist g-string that lay in the opening of her pussy.
"Oh fuck Bella." I managed.
Her lips strayed from my mouth, and nipped my earlobe.
"I wear them for you." She murmured into my ear. "Hoping that one day you'll just… rip it off me."
"I think I can oblige you with that my dear." I breathed, my breath hitching as her hand found its way back to my dick.
"Why don't you do that?"
Slowly, enjoying her pained reaction, I peeled her panties down her thigh. With innocent clumsiness, I made sure I got a good feel of her weeping slit, my fingers making a shallow voyage of her sensitive sex. With a sudden violent movement, I pulled the g-string off her. Bella bit her lip, her eyes closing momentarily with crotch moistening excitement. The underpants disappeared into my pocket.
I felt, with some disappointment, Bella shift off my lap.
you want me to for you?" She asked silkily. "Edward Cullen?"
Her eyes glanced downwards and she licked her lips, making it agonizingly (literally) clear what she wanted.
"You don't have to do that." I muttered, kissing her again.
Bella pouted playfully.
"I want to. Perhaps then you can return the favour?"
She seemed to sliver down my body, dropping cat-like onto her heels on my carpeted floor. Her eyes fixated on my cock, conveniently eye level, and with some apparent nervousness, she touched it.
"Oh…" I gasped sharply, unprepared for the surge of arousal that coursed through me.
Gently she leaned forward, and slowly licked the slit of my penis. Her tongue moved forward liquidly, tentatively licking the full length of my member. More aggressively she edged my legs apart, giving herself for room, and began the process of engulfing my cock in her immaculately made up mouth.
"Fuuuck." I groaned again, as she took me whole. Her hands moved up and gently caressed my ball sack.
Bella seemed to be enjoying her self as she gained momentum, or so those cum inducing noises she made would have you believe. My hand entwined itself in her silky hair, and I guided her as she bobbed up and down on my dick.
"Errgh…" I sighed breathlessly, feeling pressure build. "Bella I'm going to…"
"Do it." She said around my cock. "Cum."
I clenched her hair as I erupted into her mouth, Bella sucked it hard and clean, licking the last droplets from her lips. I was already hardening again.
Bella stood up, and I saw a flicker of insecurity in eyes as she contemplated whether I had had my fill. I stood too, and picking her up by the ass I directed her towards the desk.
"I want to taste you." I said, spreading her legs.
Bella smiled coyly, and leant back.
I moved to my knees, and with one finger I travelled the inside seam of her leg. I pressed it inside of her, and she jolted, her hips moving up from the desk. I inserted another finger, and enjoyed the animal sounds that she could not stop coming from her mouth.
"Edward…" She breathed. "Do it."
I removed my fingers and licked the remnants of her wetness that coated them. The salty taste made me harder still, and I was suddenly becoming very proud of my endurance. With no subtlety or introduction, I licked her pussy with the flat of my tongue, and Bella screeched with pleasure.
"Oh god Edward, oh yes."
I sucked hard on the firm little nub of her clit, alternating between the pressure of my lips and the swirling pattern of my tongue. She smelt unbelievably good, a full-bodied siren call of a smell that screamed her arousal. As I felt her get close, her muscles tensing as she prepared for orgasm, I thrust into with her my tongue, fucking her in hard, jarring strokes.
Bella came with a scream, her cum gushing onto my tongue.
"Fuck…" She breathed. "Edward…."
I moved so that I hovered above her, and her legs widened even more to accommodate me between them. Mike Newton could suck it, I though smugly as I imagined his rage if he ever found out I had been between the long legs of Bella Swan. No, that cheapened the experience, because this was Bella, who I loved, who looked up at me now, even in the throes of passion, with such compassion and joy.
"Are you sure you want this?" I asked, hard as a rock and praying she didn't say no.
"Are you kidding me?" She panted.
I pulled her skirt cum belt off her long legs, leaving her naked before me, on my desk. She licked her lips.
"I've been thinking of you fucking me for so long Edward." She breathed. "I get wet when you say hello to me in the morning. I go home in the afternoon and jerk off, just thinking about you taking me."
The mental image of Bella lying on her bed with her fingers deep in her pussy, picturing my face, sent me over the edge. I entered her with a violent grunt; we both punctuated the moment with a synched groan of pleasure.
"Fuck you're tight."
The hot walls of her cunt gripped my cock as I ploughed into her, again and again. For once I was not worried about containing myself, with Bella's legs wrapped around my waist as I fucked her hard into my desk, I couldn't have anyway. Her tits jiggled with the force of our bodies, and I covered one with the flat of my hand, rubbing it as I moved inside her.
"I used to watch you in those hot little skirts…" I confessed. "I got so hard in court. I wanted to lay you down and fuck you right there."
I increased my tempo, picturing her tight ass moving underneath the thin cloth of her skirt. The same skirt had ended up on the floor and in the present here I was, Bella completely naked underneath me.
Except for her heels of course. The imagery of this night would last me as wank fodder, for the rest of my days.
"I'm close…" Bella's back arched as she neared climax. "Harder… Fuck me hard Edward."
My thrusts became even more powerful, and I felt the nearing of my own orgasm.
"Cum with me Bella." I groaned. "Cum…"
The walls of her pussy clenched, and we came as one, her tight cunt milking me as she twisted and contorted in ecstasy. We lay against each other for a moment as our highs diminished, and finally I shifted my soft dick out of her pussy, moving a wayward tendril of hair out of her brown eyes. I listened to her breathing, the shallow in and out of indecision.
"Bella…" I murmured. I kissed her cheek as she turned away from me.
It was suddenly awkward, and I did not understand how or why it had happened so fast. Perhaps because we had both been so vulnerable, so revealing, so naked. Had I really just confessed to her… and had she really…
Bella pulled herself out, tentatively, from beneath me, the all too pleasant warmth of her body vaporising and leaving me with hole that hurt with a yet unexplored anguish.
"I'll talk to you tomorrow." Bella said formally as she gathered her clothes, I thought I saw the glint of an unshed tear gathering in her eye.
"Bella…" I croaked. I didn't know what to say, how to tell her that I wanted her to stay.
"I'll talk to you tomorrow."
And then the girl was gone and I, cum drying on my thighs, was left alone.
Bella did not, as I suspected she would not, talk to me the next day. I visited her office twice, but she was not there. Total silence. Crickets.
I gave up.
Emmett tried to prise out of me what was wrong. I snapped at him and told him to mind his own business. I could not tell him that my heart was broken, that I was embarrassed, that I was sad and lonely. I could not tell Emmett that I had made love to (fucked) Bella Swan on my desk, and that for seven days, one hundred and sixty eight hours, or ten thousand and eight minutes (depending on how you looked at it) she had not spoken to me.
I gazed out of my window, into the city, the city I loved. It did not seem to shine the same way in the sun, when I looked at it now. I could not see past the gathering clouds, no matter how much I wanted to.
Bella did not want me.
I wanted to leave. To give Carlisle my two weeks, jump on a plane and go to Europe for a few weeks. Then I would get a new job, not the job my father had created for me, one I knew I had earned from my own merits. My entire life I had followed by predestined path, under the misguided faith that I had in it being the only one to true happiness, I was not happy now, I was not even ok.
I had lost control over my self.
I had desecrated her.
I like my new plan, the idea of an escape from the humdrum of my mediocre life appealed to my skin and bones, making my toes curl in their Prada loafers. I remembered the taste of Bella's skin, the thrill of her hands moving over my body. I had felt alive. In my office last week I had felt like somebody had held a defibrillator to my dying flesh and brought me to life, and I saw everything in a new, more brilliant, more fantastic way.
Now I watched myself die again.
I would not. If Bella would not bring me to life again, I would search for a way that would.
But first I would apologise to her. Explain to her that I cared for her, but I understood if she did not care for me.
"Edward!" Jasper called to me from the hall. "Meeting."
I groaned, forcing myself to stand, and joined Jasper in the hallway.
"Wow." Jasper said frankly. "Alice was right, you look awful."
I glared at him.
Jasper shrugged in his usual calm, collected way and started walking to the boardroom. It was all right for Jasper, he had his little spark, he had his wife. Alice and Jasper were the quintessential perfect couple. He would not understand.
reached out and pushed open the door of the boardroom. I gasped when
I saw who sat inside, and pulled him by his arm out of the way.
"What is she doing here?" I hissed.
Jasper raised his eyebrows at me, surprised by my intense reaction.
"Who? Bella? Carlisle is giving her some more responsibilities. She's on the fast track now."
I put a hand over my mouth, growling as I contemplated the irony. As I prepared to end my career here at Cullen and Hale, Bella's was just gearing up.
"Wh-" Jasper stared at me intently. Then his eyes widened. "Oh man… Did you and Bella finally…"
"No!" I shouted, unconvincingly.
Jasper shook his head in amusement and I, gathering the dignity I had left, stalked past him into the boardroom.
Head high, I did not look at Bella as I took the seat beside her. I felt her stiffen and it sent a new shockwave of fresh pain into my heart.
"Bella." I acknowledged.
"Edward." She murmured, and looked away.
I accepted the itinerary from Jessica, Carlisle's very competent but uncomfortably flirtatious secretary. Placing it on the table with perfectly executed noculance I scribbled on my note pad.
Bella – We have to talk.
I bumped Bella lightly with my shoulder, the girl almost jumped out of her seat.
Ok, I thought miserably, physical contact is obviously a bit ambitious.
She glanced at my high-school-esq note and sighed. Leaning over the table, her mahogany hair falling over her face to hide her expression, Bella wrote something on her own notepad.
Meet me in my office when this meeting is over.
I nodded, Bella flicked her hair over her shoulder and gave me a long, contemplative look, one that for all my skills at catching people's lies, I could decipher.
I thought about it for the rest of the meeting as I enjoyed being studiously ignored by the woman I loved.
I dropped my notes in my office and then, with fear and anticipation, began walking to Bella's office. My heart beat fast in my chest, spreading a sickly sheen of sweat across my brow. I did not look the best I ever had, and yet I did not slow even for a bathroom break. It was now or never.
I paused outside her office and leant by forehead against the wall, summoning courage I was no longer sure I possessed. I only had one more card left in my deck, total unequivocal truth, and it would fail, I was sure. Yet like the heroes I had spent too long reading about in my youth: Samson, Romeo, Mr Darcy, I would do this for love. I would not rest, hide or give in until I knew that I had given everything I had to give.
Dignity be damned.
Steeling myself, I twisted Bella's doorknob and let myself in. She perched on the edge of her desk, her eyes widening as I entered.
I cut her off. I just had to get it out there and I didn't have the courage for hesitation.
"I meant everything I said last week." I said quickly. "I do want you, and I do think about you all the time. It's not just lust though Bella, god, It wasn't just sex. Not for me."
Bella went red.
"No please." I implored. "Just listen. The sex… It was enjoyable, of course it was, it was with you. It's more then that though, I think about us. I think about us a lot, it's all I can ever think about. You are the only person I see when I walk into a room. I may not deserve you, or be worthy of you, but I swear Bella, no one could ever love you more then me. I-I…"
She was very pale as I forced my last words out.
The room was silent as we looked at each other, her eyes filled with tears.
I twisted myself around fast enough to cause serious damage, and finally the guillotine fell and my humiliation was complete.
Oh god, oh god, oh god.
"Edward…" Bella murmured sadly.
Behind me Carlisle rose an eyebrow at us both, there was something like sick amusement twinkling in his blue eyes and I shuddered.
"Bella." Carlisle said mildly. "Perhaps you could leave Edward and I alone for a moment."
There seemed to be a glint of hysteria in Bella's eyes, this was overwhelming for her too. More so I would expect. She would hate me if I lost her, her job.
"Carlisle." She said quite calmly. "I really…"
"Bella…" Carlisle said more firmly. "Out."
Bella sighed and walked to the door. I bit my lip as I watched her go, so compliant, not like my Bella at all.
Then she stopped and turned around, oh miracles, she was looking at me.
"I'm sorry." Bella said to Carlisle with genuine remorse. "But I have to say this. And since it looks a lot like you're going to fire me anyway… So I… "
She swallowed, hovering in the doorway nervously and looked at me with an expression so full of… something. Would I ever be able to read her?
"The thing is Edward, you were wrong when you said you didn't deserve me. You do deserve me; in fact I think if you looked properly, you would see that it is I who does not deserve you. You are kind, and intelligent, and modest, and beautiful. The thing is Edward, I love you too."
The words hung in the air, and I blinked. Bella paused for a few seconds and looked at me in concern for a few moments before continuing.
"I don't think I can pretend that isn't true because I'm afraid of loosing my job…" She looked at Carlisle. "Even though it is a wonderful, perfect job with people that I adore. It wouldn't be right. I do love you Edward, and I won't hide behind a job, because I know that what I feel for you is rare, and precious…"
She petered out, looking at us both. A smile spread across my face, and shyly Bella smiled back.
"Ok, I'll go now."
Slowly she disappeared behind the door. Perhaps she would regret that in a moment, perhaps she was already regretting saying those words. I couldn't care, she had said them and until she took them back I would believe them and I would cherish them.
"Well…" Carlisle said awkwardly, starting me out of my shellshock. "This is an interesting development."
"Don't fire her." I implored in a low voice. "She loves her job, and she's good at it. I initiated everything, if you have to fire anybody fire me."
"Oh relax." Carlisle said lightly with some amusement. "Nobody is loosing their job. For god sake Edward, Alice is right, you do overreact."
the air I was holding.
Carlisle watched me intently for a few very long moments and I wondered if he was waiting for me to speak.
"Are you mad?"
Carlisle smiled at me.
"Edward, contrary to popular belief I am not an idiot, nor am I blind. I've known about your infatuation with Bella Swan for a while. If I was opposed to it I would have stopped it by now wouldn't have I."
"You don't care that we…"
Carlisle held up his hand with a wince.
"No details." He looked at me seriously and patted my shoulder. "Edward, you know that you are as much a son to me as any of my flesh and blood children. I want, more then I want you to be a successful lawyer for my firm, I want you to be happy. I am very fond of Bella, least of all because she is an absolutely spectacular person and lawyer. I can see the way she looks at you, she loves you, and she will take care of you, just as you will take care of her. I have no quandary with you and Bella Swan, Edward, if by some small chance your work does suffer because of your relationship then we can take this up again, but I trust you both."
I felt absolutely mystified, as if ten tonnes of absolutely 'never going to happen' had just fallen onto my head. Somehow, in total slip of serendipity, I had received everything I had ever wanted.
"Does this mean you won't be leaving?" Carlisle asked.
I looked at the older man in surprise. He really was shrewder then I gave him credit for. I smirked.
"I suppose I could think of a reason to stay."
"Good man!" Carlisle said happily. He made his move towards the door. "I'll let you work things out with Bella."
"Don't worry, I have a feeling things will work out."
I believed him. Perhaps it was foolish leap of faith, but I believed that I would have Bella. That next time we made love it would not be on my desk (the third or forth time maybe), but in a bed.
I gestured to Carlisle as he left, leaning against the edge of Bella's desk as I waited for her to reappear. She did not keep me waiting, after a few seconds a familiar brown head of hair walked through the door, Bella looking over her shoulder in confusion.
She stopped in the middle of the room, and looked at me with questioning eyes. The moment froze us both; the electric tension of the words we had and had not said crackling between us.
Then it broke, and we both rushed to cover the space. My lips met hers, and I pulled her against my chest, her face cupped between my hands as I kissed her.
"Mmm…" Bella sighed in relief, and for the first time I saw the tenderness in her eyes I had, apparently, been missing. "So am I fired?"
"Nope…" I said against her moving lips. "Apparently Carlisle is not as gullible as we think he is."
Bella gasped sharply as my lips found her pulse point of the side of her neck. She guided me back, so that I sat more comfortably on her desk, her body positioned between my legs.
"I should probably be more…" Her breathing hitched as I re-found that place on her neck. "-Ecstatic about that now… Seriously Edward, your lips make it hard for me to care…"
"Oh really…" I pulled away with a wicked smile. She pouted at me as she saw what I was doing. "Would you like me to stop?"
"You're hilarious…" Bella whispered with a silly grin. I kissed her again, holding her close by the base of her neck as her lips moved against mine.
"Tell me again." I murmured. "Say it again."
Bella looked at me, her eyes shining with sincerity. She held my face tenderly, leaning in so we breathed the same air.
"I love you. I love you."
Alice made a face at us, as we sat hand in hand, giggling together in the lunchroom.
"You guys are sickening. Really, we should all impose a cease and desist notice on you both."
Bella laughed and stuck her tongue out at her friend.
"Yes, because you and Jasper are so much better." She made a faux expression of simpering reverence, batting her eyelashes at me. "Oh Jaz, I love you so much I would even let you wear sneakers in public."
I pretended to swoon.
"You really are the perfect-est, my precious, darling, tiny, annoying pixie of a wife."
Alice glowered at us both.
"You are both. so. funny."
She pulled her pasta salad out of the fridge and plopped down on the table.
"At least all the sexual tension is gone."
I raised an eyebrow at Bella and she giggled. We are not yet regulated our sexual appetites, the second time we had had sex was on a bed, but the third, fifth, eighth and so on, times had not been so conservative. We were very bad in that respect actually.
"All the tension Alice?" Bella asked glibly, her eyebrow arching.
"Well maybe not… Every couple needs a little bit of positive tension."
Bella grinned as she shifted onto my lap, her lips finding mine with ease.
"Positive tension? I don't think we lack that, do you?"
Then she whispered something into my ear about underwear (or lack there of) and my personal en suite.
I was gone.