Disclaimer: Danny Phantom and all related characters...blah, blah, blah...Butch Hartman owns 'em...blah, blah, blah. This fanfic was suggested by FreeDanPhantom and was written by me for fun. Enjoy.
"Ugh, my head..." Dan groaned feeling a headache coming on, "I shouldn't of had that party last night. That's the last time I invite Skulker to anything..."
The evil future-ghost hiccuped and belched as he slowly and painfully made his way towards a nearby chair and slumped into it. Chairs, tables, and even the floor were covered in bottles of some strange beer-like drink that tasted vaguely like eggnog. It wasn't exactly beer, per se, though it had a similar effect on ghosts that actual beer had on humans. And, although Dan didn't have as big of a hangover as he normally did, his rather large beer-belly did indicate that he did drink more than his fair share of the stuff; that and he did swallow a whole turkey dinner which only added to the ghost's engorged form.
Now, all he wanted to do was digest his meal and rest for the next few weeks. Destroying the world could wait until his headache was gone as well as his nagging gut-ache. He silently damned his own gluttony on the round jiggling flesh that was his own belly.
Of course, such things would have to wait. The doorbell had made its unfortunate habit of interrupting him whenever he finally got the chance to rest.
"What now..." he sneered in annoyance as he made his way towards the door, "Hold your horses. Feh...probably those damn salesmen again..."
"Merry Christmas." said four familiar faces as the twisted poltergeist opened the door.
Dan blinked a couple of times and rubbed his eyes as if trying to see if he were dreaming. There, right before his eyes, were Jack, Maddie, Danny, and Jazz. His family...or ex-family if one wanted to be specific. He silently hoped that he was just really, really drunk and that it was all a hallucination.
Nope...they were still there. Damn...
"What the hic hell are you doing here?" Dan frowned clearly not in the mood for company.
"We came to visit you." Maddie said warmly.
"Ok, you saw me, now leave..." hissed the evil future-ghost before slamming the door in their face.
The Fentons merely stood there in shock for a moment. They looked from one member of the family to the other slowly taking in what had happened. Out of the kindness of their heart, they had visited Dan on Christmas day.
"Wow, he's still a jerk." Jazz frowned slightly.
Danny pointed out, "At least he didn't try to blow us up this time...or cook us for dinner...or tear us limb from limb or..."
"Well, he didn't look so good." Maddie pointed out before knocking on the door again.
"You're still here?" Dan frowned after realizing his ex-family wasn't going to leave anytime soon., "Fine hic come in...hic..."
Soon, Jack, Maddie, Danny, and Jazz made their way into Dan's less-than-spectacular home. Sure, it was better than the thermos, though it was far from a warm cozy place to live.
"Dan, have you been drinking again?" asked Jazz in concern noticing that Dan was still drunk.
"What...hic...gave you that idea?" he asked in annoyance.
The older sister sighed, "Never mind."
Dan reluctantly then showed him around his home. There wasn't much to look at, though. All there was were a couple of bedrooms, a kitchen, a living room, and of course a couple of bathrooms. Though, why Dan would need a bathroom for any reason was beyond his ex-family's explanation. He certainly didn't need to use a toilet for any reason...except maybe when he had to throw up, and Dan despised bathing in water because it put out his fire hair. As for Dan's bedroom, it was relatively clean and simple with only a single bed, a dresser for his clothes with a television set on top of it, and a pile of adult magazines in one corner which caused Maddie and Jazz to frown in disgust commenting in disdain over Dan's "perverted" behavior. Danny was thankfully clueless to the entire situation and Jack wisely kept his mouth shut.
"And, this hic is the Christmas tree." Dan said proudly pointing in some random direction in the living room.
"Honey," Maddie blinked at the object Dan was pointing at, "that's a tower of beer bottles."
Dan glanced drunkenly at the beer-bottle pyramid he had made, "So it is burp. Thank you, Dolly Parton..."
"You gotta admit, it is an impresive tower." Jack pointed out.
"Look, I ain't got anything for ya." Dan pointed out idly, "I don't even celebrate this holiday that much...Too many bad memories."
Maddie gently hugged Dan, "We know. But, we're here now. We came to see you, son."
Dan blinked in confusion. Either he was really, REALLY drunk, or his family was downright insane. Still...
"Yeah," the evil future-ghost smirked, "I suppose you can stay for a while. Merry Christmas, Mom...Dad...Jazz...Stupid Past-Self."
Danny merely sneered in response. This was going to be a long Christmas...