Ten v. SpongeBob: Happy Holidaze

INT. TARDIS

Ten is leaning against the wall watching Rose as she washes the dinner dishes.

Rose: (clears throat nervously) Doctor, there's been something I've been meaning to ask you…

Ten: (fiddling with his sonic screwdriver, responds distractedly) Oh yeah, what's that, Rose?

Rose: Well… you know that the Holidays are coming up.

Ten: Um… Holidays? What d'ya mean?

Rose: Christmas is a few weeks away.

Ten: (dreamily) Christmas?

Rose: (smiles sweetly) Yeah… You know, Santa Claus and ho-ho-ho, and mistletoe and presents to pretty girls…

Ten: (smiles blankly back at her) Huh?

Rose: (exasperated he didn't get her pop culture joke) Doctor! My mum will be expecting us, or at least me, for Christmas.

Ten: (stands up a little straighter, finally taking notice) And…?

Rose: And I'd like to go home!

Ten: (confusedly) What? You want to go home now?

Rose: (eyes flash) No! I want to go home for Christmas. Christmas!

Ten: Ah! Christmas… Happy Holidays, Rose. Happy days…

Rose: (relaxes a bit, smiles) Yes, happy days to you, too, Doctor.

Ten: And when would you like to go home, then?

Rose: Well, Christmas is three weeks from this Tuesday so, maybe the Sunday or Monday before?

Ten: Happy Holidays, Rose. Right… Sunday or Monday. Happy, happy days…

Rose: (nods) Yes, whichever you prefer is fine with me. Sunday… Monday… Happy days…

Ten: (nods back silently)

Rose: (looks worriedly at him) Doctor, are you all right?

Ten: I'm fine, Rose, what makes you think I'm not?

Rose: (perplexed) It's just that I'm not sure you're listening to me.

Ten: Oh, I'm listening…

Rose: Then what did I just say?

Ten: (puts his sonic to his lips, lightly blows into it and it plays the key of C) You said…

Rose: (looks alarmed)

Ten: (puts away sonic, begins to sing)

Sunday, Monday, Happy Days…

Rose: (groaning, backs away) Oh geez…

Ten: (ignores her, his voice gains volume)

Tuesday, Wednesday, Happy Days…
Thursday, Friday, Happy Days…
The weekend comes,
My cycle hums,
Ready to race to you.

Rose: (puts down dishtowel, moves toward the door)

Ten: (grabs Rose's right hand in his and spins her)

These days are all,
Happy and free. (Those Happy Days)
These days are all,
Share them with me. (Those Happy Days)

Rose: (tries to step away) Doctor!

Ten: (smiles wickedly, pulls her into a ballroom stance)

Goodbye grey sky, hello blue.
There's nothing can hold me when I hold you.
Feels so right, it can't be wrong.
Rockin' and rollin' all week long.

Rose: (gasps) Oh!

Ten: (interrupts himself) Correctamundo! (starts to dance as he resumes singing)

This day is ours.
Won't you be mine? (Oh Happy Days)
This day is ours. (Oh Happy Days)
Oh please be mine.

Rose: Oh dear!

Ten: (foxtrots Rose backwards across the kitchen)

Hello sunshine, goodbye rain,
She's wearing my high school ring on her chain.
She's my steady, I'm her man,
I'm gonna…

Rose: (finally breaks free, flees kitchen) Arghhhh!

Ten: (sings softly to himself, then smiles) …love her all I can…

Author's note:

I take full responsibility for this one.

And just in case you're wondering: Fonz (whimsical, aloof, cool, sexy) -- Ten; Joanie (sweet, beautiful, feisty, a bit clumsy) -- Rose; Ritchie (loyal, optimistic, reliable, devoted) -- Jack.

Other ideas for theme songs happily accepted!

"Aaay!"