The Merry Misadventures of Florian the Great

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Disclaimer: I don't claim to own Tales of the Abyss or any of its relevant characters…that is, I am disclaiming ownership of said game and anything pertaining to said game. The end.

Chapter Summary: It was all because of that little white kitty…

Everyone remembers Phone…er, Fon Master Ion, sickly-sweet, girly-voiced, too-feminine little doer of good.

But what of poor little Florian, player of hide-and-go-seek, eater of bagels, and less-important Fon Master Replacement?

Well, the simple, hard truth is, no one cares about Florian. He's just an eensy-weensy little speck of dust in the wind that is life. Which is where our story begins.

It was Cleaning Day at the fabulous Daath Cathedral, that horrible place in which it's infuriatingly easy to get lost and die cold, hungry, and alone. Speaking of alone, Fon Master Florian was feeling quite alone himself, kicking rocks around in the street outside the cathedral.

Florian had recently been banned from any and all Cleaning Days, courtesy of a disaster that it would be best to ignore at this present moment. Suffice it to say, Florian didn't mind Cleaning Day, but Cleaning Day minded him.

Cleaning the whole darned cathedral took an abnormally long time and, since the nitpicky members all insisted on keeping the whole place clean, not just the parts people could see, Florian really had no choice but to stand outside for the better part of two days as the rest of the members of Daath scoured the cathedral from top to bottom, way down in the depths of the Underworld. And, although no one really knew how, they somehow managed to get the ceiling, as well.

Sighing sadly, Florian kicked some more rocks around. He was bored and lonely. Not to mention he was hungry and in the mood for some cookies. He sighed again. No, no one cared about Florian. Even the people who were stuck on the Score tended to avoid him when he wasn't being supervised. He often heard them asking weird questions such as "Is the Fon Master…you know…broken?"

"Am I broken?" Florian asked no one in particular, considering he was all by himself, standing in a little corner, kicking rocks. He didn't feel broken. Plus anyway, he wasn't even forced to read the Score. Florian stopped kicking rocks and bit one of his fingers. And then something caught his attention.

Over there, right by the wall. Something white. Florian stared hard, as if that would make the thing appear again. It didn't, so Florian really had no choice but to go look for himself. Really.

Walking cautiously up to the corner of the wall, Florian peeked around it. And there, to his utter delight, sat a little white kitty, small and fluffy and oh-so-adorable.

Florian, in all his excitement, let out an overjoyed squeak, which caused the cat to start. It stood up, looking as if it were ready to hightail it out of there. (Sorry, the pun was totally intended. I couldn't help myself.)

"No, wait, kitty!" cried Florian. "Don't go!"

But the kitty went, all right. Right down the alley and over a wall.

Florian sighed, feeling let down for a moment. Suddenly, though, he perked up. Florian knew what he was going to do, and, by gum, he was going to do it.

Peering around cautiously, to make sure none of the scary Daath members saw him, Florian crept up to the wall. If the kitty went over the wall, then so would he. Although…although the wall looked very tall from where he was standing…

Shaking his head, Florian decided it would be no big feat to climb over it. The tiny kitty had managed to clear the wall; why couldn't he? For, although Florian was a bit short, and a bit skinny, and a bit girlish-looking, he was far bigger than a little white kitty, and should, in theory, be able to get over the wall with ease.


It was easy to find a crack in the wall. After that, it was just a matter of managing to get his foot into the crack. Florian had never climbed anything before. He'd seen Anise do it, though. Oh, Anise would be so proud of him! Florian doubled his efforts, and soon he was able to reach the top of the wall with the tips of his fingers.

"Oh, hold on, kitty, I've almost made it!" said Florian hopefully. Just a little bit more…

Florian stretched a bit taller, almost losing his footing. With that final stretch, however, he caught the edge with both of his hands, and, with some serious effort, being as his arms were quite…well, scrawny…Florian hoisted himself up onto the top of the wall.

Cheeks flushed with the effort and the excitement, Florian sat there for a minute, looking a bit like Humpty-Dumpty, dressed in his Fon Master finery. Then, swinging his legs a bit, Florian hopped down just a little awkwardly. He landed a lot awkwardly, though, tumbling onto the dusty ground.

Sitting up, Florian looked around, ignoring the various scrapes and bruises he had sustained from the landing. His heart sank. There was no kitty to be seen. However…there were an awful lot of houses. Maybe the kitty had gone into one of them?

Florian stood up, not bothering to brush the dust off his clothes, mostly because he didn't notice it. He was immediately filled with new excitement, for he had never been in this part of Daath. Usually he was either with Maestro Tritheim in the chapel or alone in the room they had given him. Except when Anise came to visit, which brought him to an entirely new train of thought. After a few minutes, though, Florian looked around and remembered what he had been doing. And so Florian set off to find the kitty and, perhaps, have a grand adventure.

Sorry, I just had to do it. Florian deserves a grand adventure, too, you know? Anyway, if you have any ideas for later chapters, or would like me to add anything or anyone, please give the word, and I'll see what I can do. I'm flexible. Literally? Maybe. Oh, and, if you'd be so kind, please leave a review. I'm conducting an experiment, and your simple review would be a great help…or you could just do it out of the kindness of your heart. Either would work.