Tanya yelled at me to come join them, I could hear her but not really see her, as the sun blinding me from all that surrounded.
I knew this has been a bad idea in the first place, family holidays were always the worst, nothing ever happened on them. I sunk in to the sand below, my hands sliding into the warm grainy dough, my face turned up. I might as well get a tan if I absolutely had to be here.
I could hear Tanya calling out, yelling at our brothers to stop whatever foolishness they were up to now, but it was as if I wasn't here at all, I could be back home with him. I could be warm in his embrace the way the sun held me now. I could look into his eyes, the deepest and brightest topaz you've ever seen. I smiled happily and let my eyes open for just a second, and was startled to find his eyes staring back at me. I'd flicked them closed too quickly to really see. I breathed in the scent of burgers from across the beach, the sweet sugary smell of spilt ice-cream, taking a moment to recover and opened my eyes again. There was no one there, but I looked up away from the sun and realised the sky was reflecting my dreams, as if some god knew what I wanted to see and so held this beautiful topaz gem high in the sky to shine down on me. But as much as I'd wanted it two seconds ago I loathed it now, it wasn't the truth.
I closed my eyes again to ignore the iris that was as wide as the sky, only to see it inside my head once again.
Tanya was still shouting at my brothers, but I could almost hear the smile on her face now, and the laughter she let slip. Those stupid little boys, but you had to admit they were cute. I smiled as I thought of how they'd managed to completely aggravate my father and step-mother in the car on the way here. Pleased with anything that upset her I could not get angry at them today, it just wasn't fair.
So I ignored they're childish play and tried to think of more pleasant things, him for one. The waves crashed on the beach lower down, but I could hear them as if they were about to soak me. Memories of sitting by the pool haunted me, I could see him teasing me, flicking water with his finger, then two, and then his whole hand getting closer to hitting me with the cool water. His grin of mischief that I found so utterly adorable making my laugh at his teasing, he wouldn't really soak me, but then he'd flash a quick smirk and hit the water hard and it was like a waterfall over my head. I jumped as I realised the tide had come in and really was soaking me, it had been miles of not long ago, I was sure of that. How long had I been day dreaming?
I stood, pulling my hands up with some difficultly, the dough had set a little as I sat there. The sun was lowered, the sky not reflecting his eyes at me anymore. I felt a little sad, but I knew I would go on. This holiday was just the first, soon I would go home a then have to see him and know he wasn't mine anymore.
My Ashley was gone, and all that was left now was the crashing waves against my legs.