Life with Derek
Casey & Derek finally bang in a special new episode written for T. Brooks.
CASEY is sitting on the toilet seat in the bathroom. Dramatic music plays as the camera travels from the floor to her face. SHE looks shocked and is staring at a pregnancy test in her hands.
CASEY: No! No! This cannot be happening!
LIZZIE: (outside the bathroom, knocking on the door.) Hurry up Casey! I have to shower!
CASEY: Yea, just a minute. (stands up and continues staring at the stick.)
EDWIN: (To LIZZIE) She's been in there for 23 minutes! I can't be late for school.
LIZZIE: Well neither can I! (banging on door) Casey!
MARTY: (joins LIZZIE and EDWIN, bangs on door) Casey! I have to go pee!
CASEY: (ignoring her siblings, leaning on the sink and nervously dials on her cell phone) Emily? Hey, it's Casey. Can you come over? It's an emergency! (pause) Yes, right now! Okay, bye. (hangs up and looks nervous)
LIZZIE, EDWIN & MARTY: (ad lib while banging on the door.)
DEREK: (walks out of his room with a towel and towards the bathroom.) What's going on out here?
LIZZIE: It's Casey!
EDWIN: She's been in there for 25 minutes, I'm going to be late!
LIZZIE: So am I!
MARTY: And I have to pee!
DEREK: Okay, move over. (THEY move, to CASEY through the door) Casey! If you don't open this door in 3 seconds, I will. 1...2...3! (DEREK shoves the door open. CASEY quickly stashes the test behind her back.)
CASEY: Oh, sorry. I was just finishing. (runs out of the bathroom, towards her room. DEREK nods and starts the shower. HE shuts the door.)
LIZZIE: We were here first!
MARTY: And I have to pee! (THEY all continue screaming and banging the door, like they did for CASEY. CASEY goes into her room and shuts the door behind her.)
CASEY: (sighs. EMILY is sitting on her bed.) Emily? You're here already?
EMILY: You sounded pretty anxious on the phone so I just ran over. And your mom said I could just go right up to your room. (CASEY nods, distracted) Casey, what's wrong?
CASEY: Well…(hesitates, then sits on the bed.)
EMILY: C'mon, Casey. You can tell me. We're best friends. We share every-
CASEY: -I'm pregnant.
EMILY: Ever since the first day we met, we always…what? (CASEY looks at EMILY meaningfully.) You're what?
CASEY: (hands EMILY the test.) I'm pregnant. Look.
EMILY: Oh my god. Casey. Are you serious?
CASEY: (stands up) Well unless the 2 offensively bright pink lines mean something else then yes, I am seriously pregnant.
EMILY: How did this happen?
CASEY: Well, remember the party last week?
EMILY: The end-of-summer, seniors-only party at Kendra's?
CASEY: Yea, well. I didn't really wanna go. (sits back down.)
(CASEY voice is heard saying the lines below while the flashback scene takes place.)
CASEY: But Derek said I had to. For one thing, it was tradition, every senior went to this party. And Max was going to be there. So if I didn't go he'd think I didn't go so I could avoid him. So I went. (flash back scene starts) Derek gave me a cup of something, I swear tasted like juice, and told me to have fun. You weren't there so I really had no one to talk to.
EMILY: I had to babysit!
CASEY: cntd. I know. So I spent the whole night just listening to Sheldon Shlepper and his really detailed story about his warts. I made an excuse to leave and went to refill my drink for maybe the tenth time. Things were starting to get hazy and I knew the juice was more then just juice. Anyway, as I was filling my cup, that's when I saw it. Max, lying on Kendra's sofa underneath Sally.
EMILY: Oh my god! No! Max, and Derek's Sally?
CASEY: cntd. Derek's Sally, from The Smelly Cat. And right across the room, was Derek. He saw it too. It was awful. We ended up outside on the porch, drinking and talking about how much we hated Max and Sally. At one point I was crying and Derek wiped my tears off my face. I don't remember much after that but I guess one thing lead to another and… Well I woke up on the porch swing, naked, next to a sleeping Derek.
EMILY: What? Casey? You and Derek?
CASEY in a black dress and jean jacket. DEREK hands her a drink and walks off. SHE walks around awkwardly. Cut to - SHE is standing by the stairs while SHELDON talks to her. CASEY looks bored and finishes her drink. SHE smiles politely then heads to the kitchen to refill her drink. SHE is at one entrance to the room and DEREK is at the other. THEY are both staring, shocked and upset, at the couch. MAX and SALLY are lying there making out. People are all around the room, drinking and talking. Cut to- CASEY and DEREK sitting on the porch stairs. THEY are drinking and talking as people are leaving the house. CASEY starts to tear and DEREK reaches over and wipes her tears. Then, HE pulls her towards him and kisses her gently. THEY begin to kiss and then start to undress. Cut to- CASEY lying in DEREK's arms on the porch swing. SHE is naked but covered by a blanket. Her face is shocked.
CASEY: (making the same shocked face that ended the flash back.) I know! But we were drunk and…
EMILY: Casey, he's your brother!
CASEY: Step! We're not related! And there's always been, sexual tension.
CASEY: There has! But of course we didn't plan to do anything about it! I can't believe it happened and now this! (gestures towards pregnancy test on bed.)
EMILY: (looks at the pregnancy test, becomes a little less frantic and more solemn) So, what are you going to do?
CASEY: I don't know Em.
EMILY: Have you told him yet?
CASEY: I will, I will. Just not yet. I can't deal with that just yet. You're the first person I've told. One thing at a time.
EMILY: Okay. But you will tell him?
CASEY: Yea, just not right now.
CASEY: Let's just get through breakfast. (Opens the door and lets EMILY walk out ahead. CASEY stashes the pregnancy test in her drawer and then follows EMILY out.)
CASEY and EMILY head downstairs for a busy breakfast with the rest of the family.
NORA: Good morning girls! Emily, will you be joining us for breakfast?
EMILY: Oh, no thanks. I ate at home.
NORA: All right. Well Case, take a seat, you'll be eating for two then.
NORA: Well, I assumed Emily was going to eat so I made her some eggs. And since she doesn't want any…you're going to have to eat her share.
CASEY: (grits her teeth, to EMILY) I don't want to eat for two.
EMILY: (to NORA) Uh, actually, I've changed my mine. I am pretty hungry, I'll eat my share. (Sits down and begins chomping on the eggs) Mmmm, yum, thanks.
GEORGE: Milk ladies? (EMILY'shakes her head.) Casey, would you like some milk?
CASEY: Huh? Oh, no. Definitely not. I'll just have some juice. (CASEY walks over to the fridge to get the juice. GEORGE looks at NORA puzzled, NORA shrugs.)
(MARTY comes bounding down the stairs with notebook and pencil. She is followed by EDWIN and LIZZIE.)
NORA: Good morning! What took you guys so long? You're going to be late!
LIZZIE: Well, Casey was-
NORA: (ignoring LIZZIE, looks at watch) Actually, I'm going to be late! Oh my goodness! My meeting! I can't be late!
GEORGE: Okay, Nora honey, don't worry. You go, be on time. I'll get the kids to school.
NORA: Are you sure?
GEORGE: Of course, now go.
NORA: Okay, okay. (downs her drink and heads toward the door, grabbing papers, her bag and jacket on her way out.) Bye Georgie! Bye kids! Love you!
ALL (except NORA): ad lib various good byes
MARTY: Nobody checked my homework last night!
GEORGE: What? Oh I'm sorry Marty, I forgot.
MARTY: But my teacher said we had to get our homework checked!
GEORGE: Right, okay-
EDWIN: Dad, what's for breakfast?
GEORGE: Uh, check if there are any buns in the oven. (EDWIN goes to the oven and pulls out cinnamon buns and plates them.)
GEORGE: Nora baked some cinnamon buns this morning. I think she left them in the oven.
MARTY: My homework!
LIZZIE: George! We're going to be late!
GEORGE: Where's Derek?
MARTY: My homework!
GEORGE: Right, okay. Lizzie can you check Marty's homework? And Edwin, can you check on Derek? I'm going to go start the car. (GEORGE grabs a cinnamon bun and heads out the back door. EDWIN nods and heads upstairs.)
LIZZIE: Fine. Marty, let me see your homework.
MARTY: (hands her notebook) I had to write a paragraph about a pet. (LIZZIE nods and begins reading.)
LIZZIE: You missed a period.
CASEY: What did you say !?
LIZZIE: I said, Marty missed a period at the end of this sentence.
MARTY: Can you just fix it for me?
LIZZIE: Fine. (fixes the problem then folds up the notebook) Okay, let's go Marty. I don't want to be late.
GEORGE: (sticks his head in the back door and shouts) Let's go!
LIZZIË: Coming! (grabs her bag and jacket and runs out the door.) (MARTY does the same and follows behind her. EDWIN comes running down the stairs.)
EDWIN: Okay, Derek said he'd be down in 5 minutes. (car horn honks. EDWIN grabs his bag and jacket.) Bye! (dashes out the door)
EMILY: Bye. (to CASEY) Wow, your house is crazy in the mornings. (CASEY nods) You okay Case?
CASEY: Um, yea. Let's go. I don't really want to be here when Derek comes down.
(Both girls grab their bags and jackets and head out the front door.)
CASEY is walking down the crowded hallway, looking paranoid and holding books in front of her stomach. EMILY catches up with her.
EMILY: Hey Casey, how's it going?
CASEY: Not so great, I feel like everyone's staring at me.
EMILY: No one's staring.
CASEY: Yes they are! (pulls books in front of her stomach)
EMILY: Well maybe if you didn't do that! (pulls books away) Casey, you don't look any different then you did yesterday, stop worrying. No one can tell you're pregnant.
CASEY: Shhhhhhhhh! Emily!
EMILY: Well they can't! Besides, you don't start showing until the end of your first trimester.
CASEY: What? (They have reached their lockers and are now unloading & loading their bags)
EMILY: Well I did some research during business class and you won't start showing until you're about 3 months pregnant.
CASEY: What else did you find out?
EMILY: A lot actually. I want to be prepared so I can help you.
CASEY: Thanks Em. Really, that means a lot. But I can't deal with any of this right now. I'm just going to go to Math and pretend this isn't happening.
EMILY: But Casey-
CASEY: Not now, please. (EMILY sighs and then nods) I'll see you later. (CASEY walks off down the hallway, looking sad. SHE is about to go into her math class when she sees DEREK walking. SHE quickly turns to avoid him and walks down another hallway. SHE comes up to the guidance office. CASEY sighs, and then knocks on the door.)
PAUL: Come in.
PAUL is seated at his desk eating a sandwich. CASEY walks into his office and shuts the door behind her.
CASEY: Hey Paul.
PAUL: I thought your appointment was scheduled for tomorrow.
CASEY: It is. I just need to talk.
PAUL: Sure, have a seat. (CASEY drops her bag and sits while PAUL puts away his sandwich. HE smiles at CASEY. SHE gestures to her lip.) Oh right! (PAUL wipes his mouth and chuckles.) All right, what's on your mind?
CASEY: I'm going to be honest with you. I'm not going to try to be subtle or anything. And I'm really nervous and I have no idea what to do with myself anymore. I don't even know-
CASEY: -what I should do or what I need. It's really hard because-
PAUL: You're babbling. Just calm down and let me know what's bothering you.
CASEY: Right, okay. Deep breath and just say it. I can do that because-
CASEY: I'm pregnant.(pause, CASEY and PAUL stare at each other.)
CASEY: Okay? That's all you have to say? Just, okay?
PAUL: Well no, I just never expected something like this. Especially from you.
CASEY: I know! Obviously this isn't something I expected of myself! I'm Casey McDonald. I get straight A's, I do my homework the second it's assigned. I tutor sixth graders on the weekend. I do not get pregnant! I don't know why this is happening to me. (CASEY has dissolved in tears. PAUL offers her a tissue.)
PAUL: Casey, calm down. It's going to be okay.
CASEY: The worst part is I'm so concerned about what everyone else is going to think. What will my mom say, or my sister? And all my friends? Even the father of the baby! I have been so focused on everyone else's reactions I don't even know what I think about it.
PAUL: Well Casey, what do you think about being pregnant?
CASEY: I don't know.
PAUL: That's okay. You don't need to have any firm opinions just yet. When did you find out you were pregnant?
CASEY: Officially, today.
PAUL: Okay. And do you have any plans?
PAUL: For your pregnancy. There are options. Tell me what you've done so far.
CASEY: Gotten pregnant. Taken a test. And told my best friend, and now I've told you.
PAUL: Well, there are the 3 A's.
CASEY: The 3 A's? This is starting to sound academic.
PAUL: (chuckles a little) Putting it in terms you can relate to. But seriously, the 3 A's: Abortion, Adoption and Acceptance.
CASEY: Oh, I get it. I have to pick one.
PAUL: That's right. But you don't have to pick now. It's a big decision. That should involve both you and the father of the baby. This decision will affect both of you. (CASEY nods)
CASEY: Thanks Paul.
PAUL: Casey, I want you to know that you can come and talk to me anytime, okay?
CASEY: Of course Paul. I will. (Stands up to leave.)
CASEY returns home. LIZZIE and EDWIN are watching TV.
LIZZIE: Hey Casey
LIZZIE: You okay Casey? You look a little out of it.
CASEY: I'm fine Lizzie, I'm just going to go upstairs.
EDWIN: To do your homework?
LIZZIE: What else? Of course Casey's going to do her homework.
CASEY: Right, of course. (heads upstairs. At the top of the stairs, CASEY takes a deep breath, nods and then confidently walks over to DEREK's room. SHE pushes open the door and sees DEREK sitting in his office chair, back to the door.)
CASEY: Derek, I'm pregnant. (The chair spins around and SAM is sitting there. Both are visibly shocked.) Sam?
SAM: Hi Casey.
CASEY: What are you doing here? (CASEY walks into the room. DEREK is seated on the bed, jaw dropped, staring at her.)
SAM: I'm in town with my dad. He's here for a business meeting and I thought I'd come and say hi to Derek, and you.
CASEY: Oh, hi.
DEREK: Sam, do you mind? I think I need to talk to Casey.
SAM: Sure, I don't mind. (sits there smiling.)
DEREK: Get out Sam.
SAM: Oh right! I'm going to go get something to eat. (SAM walks out of the room. CASEY shuts the door.)
CASEY: So…how was school?
DEREK: You're what?
DEREK: You're pregnant.
CASEY: Well, yes. I took a test this morning.
DEREK: That's why you spent forever in the bathroom. (CASEY nods. DEREK gets up and starts to pace. HE sits in his office chair.)
CASEY: Derek, what are we going to do?
DEREK: So it's mine.
CASEY: Yes. You remember Kendra's party last week? (DEREK nods.)
DEREK: Have you decided anything?
CASEY: No, I thought we'd decide together.
DEREK: What do you want to do?
CASEY: I don't know.
DEREK: Am I the first person you told?
CASEY: No, I told Emily…and Paul. (DEREK nods seriously.) Are you mad?
DEREK: Well I sure as hell aren't thrilled Casey!
CASEY: I'm sorry! I panicked and I called Emily this morning! And I saw Paul during school. He's my guidance counsellor. I just really needed to-
DEREK: I'm not mad about that Case! I can't believe this happened! This situation is crazy!
CASEY: (crying) I know! I've been dealing with it too! Obviously we didn't want this! And I know the situation is crazy, but…(dissolves in tears. DEREK gets up and goes to her. HE puts her hands around his neck and hugs her.)
DEREK: Shhh, it's okay Case. Don't cry. I know you've been dealing with a lot. And I'm sorry I freaked out but this is shocking. For both of us. (CASEY nods) But I'm here, okay? We're doing this together. (DEREK kisses her cheek and hands her a tissue. CASEY takes it and smiles.)
CASEY: I think we need to tell them.
DEREK: Tell who?
CASEY: My mom and George. I know they're going to be shocked and upset and disappointed but I think we need to tell them. I can't lie to my mom and I really need her support for this.
DEREK: I guess you're right. We will need to tell them eventually. Are you ready to do it now? (CASEY takes a deep breath and nods.) Okay, let's go.
DEREK and CASEY leave his room. At the top of the staircase DEREK turns to CASEY and extends his hand. SHE takes it and they walk hand in hand downstairs. NORA is at the kitchen table and GEORGE is in the kitchen.
NORA: Hey Casey! Guys, Sam said he had to go but he'd call you tomorrow.
CASEY: Okay, where is everyone?
NORA: Well, Marty is over at Dimi's. Edwin and Lizzie are doing their homework upstairs and George is starting dinner.
CASEY: Well, we need to talk to you.
DEREK: Both of you. (shouts) Dad!
GEORGE: (coming from the kitchen with a dish towel.) What is it Derek?
CASEY: We need to tell you guys something. (ALL sit. CASEY looks at DEREK and HE nods encouragingly)
NORA: Actually, (looks at GEORGE who grins at her) we have something we need to tell you guys. (NORA and GEORGE are giddy and excited while CASEY and DEREK are nervous.)
DEREK: You do?
NORA: Well we were going to wait to tell all of you together, but (grins, looks at GEORGE again) I can't wait!
DEREK: (persistent) Well our news can't wait either.
NORA: Well all right! You guys go ahead.
CASEY: (CASEY takes a deep breath, DEREK squeezes her hand. Across the table, GEORGE squeezes NORA's hand with excitement. At the last moment, CASEY chickens out.) Actually, mom, tell us your news first!
DEREK: (quietly, irritated, to CASEY) Case…
NORA: No, no, no honey. You go ahead.
CASEY: Really, mom, I insist!
DEREK: (frantic) Casey!
NORA: You share your news first!
GEORGE: (impatient) Nora.
CASEY: Please, mom-
NORA: Casey, tell us!
CASEY: Really, mom
NORA: Really, Casey
CASEY & NORA: I'm pregnant. (ALL are extremely shocked. CASEY and NORA immediately drop DEREK and GEORGE's hands. ALL stare at one another as the camera fades out. 'To Be Continued' flashes up on the screen.)