Emmett licks a frozen poll

Emmett licks a frozen poll

Disclaimer: I don't own Emmett or Chuck Norris but I do own the Emmett Cullen fan club shirt which I'm wearing right now…WITH PANTS!!


"E is for emotional ruins everybody's day,

M is for miserable people,

O is for on the dark side cause we have fresh cookies, COOKIES!!" I was yelling. That's when I decided to find Jasper and ask him an important question.


He gave me a wired look "What song, Emmett?"

"The Emo song DUH."

Rose came out of no where and slapped me up side the head it hurt. But I knew it was a love tap.

"Emmett go take out the trash before I hurt you." hissed Rose.

"I don't want to kill some one to day" I whined.

"Not that kind you lazy ass, this kind." Rose yelled. Oh. She was holding a garbage bag.

I strolled out side singing my garbage song: Taken out the trash, OH taken out the trash, OH.

I went to the front door to go back in but it was locked. So was the back door. It was locked shocker. I looked through the window and saw all the family watching Walker Texas Ranger. NO!! HOW DARE THEY WHATCH IT WITH OUT ME. They didn't even give me time to change into my Chuck Norris PJ's!!

I banged on the door. Jasper turned, glared, then turned back.

EVIL!! HaHa Every Villain Is Lemons HaHa go Spongebob!! (A/N: coughcoughPatrick and Spongebob are gaycoughcough) whats his problem?

So I went to the bathroom window to see if it was open. Then I saw…EDWARD SHAVING HIS LEGS!! OMG I need my camera. DAMIT left it in side.

Then I saw a poll. It looked pretty. So I licked it. Don't ask why.


nobody ever came. His tongue was so cold the ice never melted.


JK the fan girls saved him we will leave out what they did after they tied him up.


A/N That was my first fanfic ever hope you loved it. My cousin Mancar helped me. Review if you like TACOS!!