Max's mind was frozen. It was like she was incapable of forming a single thought. Despite the idea being logical, to an extent, there was always emotional baggage when a simple request turned out to be not so simple.
"What? You… What?" Alec gaped in shock and confusion. He shook his head and looked away. Max repeated the question, as if to prove he had not imagined it.
"No. No. No, I can't. Is this a joke? Are you messing with me, Max?"
The determined expression on her face and the awkward, anxious silence lasted too long for it to be fake. Max never broke a grin and started laughing at his reaction. She just looked at her feet and bit her lip…
Now it was after the fact. It was too late to change her mind. Max silently tried to convince herself that what had happened was nothing; just one good friend asking another to do something they had done before. She failed- it was far from nothing. Last time was unavoidable; it was the reason they were in this entire mess. To choose to repeat that, however, with unclouded heads was something else.
Alec continued to sit in the dark and watch the night sky outside the window. He was trying to comprehend why Max had asked him that question. All the times he had joked about it had ceased the moment it had happened for real. He was lost as to a reason why she would even contemplate it. Alec was just lost.
"Alec?" The silence was broken. The word echoed slightly off the aging walls and decrepit furniture around them. He looked towards her for the first time since she had asked.
"Alec, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have even asked. It's not fair to you." Silence fell around the room again in a pause for thought. Max looked toward Alec, catching his eye before looking away in shame.
"No, Max, don't be. It's okay. Just… why did you?" The inconceivable vastness of space was more conceivable to Alec than this conversation. For a moment his wished for his old apartment, with his pre-pulse liquor and boob tube.
"I'm dying, Alec. Maybe we will find a solution, but at the moment I'm pregnant, I'm dying and I have never had sex without being in heat." Max sighed and stood up.
"I don't know what this virus bitch is going to do to me. I don't know if I'm going to be stuck in bed with my hair falling out around me this time next week." Max sat down again, unsure of what to do with herself. She just knew that she could not run away from this.
"All I know, Alec, is that I do want to die- hell, I don't even want to have a baby, without having, at least once, made the decision of my own free will to have sex. I don't want to be some screwed up post-pulse version of the Virgin Mary simply because Manticore decided something was practical."
It was Alec's turn to sigh. With all the resilient genes Manticore had given them, this was something they had failed to equip them for.
"So… you want to choose to have sex with your baby's father so that Manticore doesn't win? I can understand that, but… no, screw it. I'll do it." Alec stood up, and walked towards her. He stopped a couple of metres away, waiting for her to make the next move. He did not want this to be just another thing he screwed up.
Max looked taken aback.
"Just like that? You'll do it?" Alec responded with a nod.
"If you are certain it is what you want, then yes. I'll do this for you." He would do anything for her.
Max slowly stood up, and walked towards him. Despite everything- Manticore, logic, Logan- it seemed right, as if she was part of a fluff story.
"Then kiss me."
A/N-- I appologise for the hiatus. I have been incredibly busy with my studies and I've been sick... yes, for over six months. Nothing life threatening, just a little incapacitating on the writing front. I hope poeple are still interested in reading it, and that it is still worth reading :) Appologetic e-muffins and fiz-shipper soda. :p