This Isn't the End
Summary: Victoria's a random girl in school, with a crush on one of the popular people, Roxas. Can she survive high school without him by her side—or will her dreams be shattered when he starts going out with Kairi, of all people?
RATED M FOR LANGUAGE AND THOUGHTS!
I sighed as I looked down at my notebook. It was rainbow-colored; I like to be different. I was dubbed 'quiet, shy, emo queer geek' in the beginning of high school, so basically no-one talked to me. That is, if you didn't count one of my only friends, Namine. She was quiet, but really pretty, and she was best friends with the popular kids. Unfortunately, some of the popular people thought of me as 'trash' that they should 'get rid of'.
Uh, yeah, Kairi, I'm talking to you.
Bad thing is, Namine's Kairi's twin sister, but nicer. And less slutty. Let's just say, if Namine was an angel, Kairi would be a devil.
I guess I should tell you what I look like while the teacher's lecturing. I have really layered black hair, it reached my midback, and the part I put in front of me was white-blond with blackish dots in it. It reminded me of a moth. Or a butterfly. I had it in an emo-cut, so I had bangs with white-blond highlights that almost covered my right eye. I had a black-and-red striped bow in it, keeping my bangs in place.
Oh, and I have brown eyes. But I have tons of colored contacts, 'cause I love cosplaying, and right now I had blue colored contacts on. I had eyeliner on, so it basically outlined my eyes. Yeah. Nobody but Namine knew my real eye color, 'cause I had different colored contacts every day, except whenever I wanted to have brown eyes. But no-one could really guess what eye color I had.
I was wearing light-washed blue skinny jeans, held by a studded belt with a silver chain hanging down to mid-thigh, with black-and-white checkered Converse. I had on my sleeveless hoodie on (it was white, with a large black skull in the middle of it; and it had a hood!), with my black Paramore T-shirt underneath.
I think I look nice, don't you?
Well, since I was deemed an 'emo-freak', I didn't have many friends, as I've told you before. Lots of people thought I was a cutter because I covered my wrists a lot, which isn't true; I just loved messing with bracelets. Right now I had a simple black string-thing on my left wrist, and color-coded bracelets on my left, rainbow-style, then a few black ones, then my watch, and underneath them was fishnet. I love fishnet, for some reason.
"VICTORIA! Pay attention!" my teacher, Ms. Crabtree, barked, glaring at me. Okay, here's the deal: she hates me because I insist that she's single and only uses 'Ms.' because she's ashamed so she doesn't want her students know she's in her late thirties (or was it early forties?) has never married.
I shrugged and returned to doodling in my notebook. I heard this one popular, Kairi, say to Namine, "I hear that that Victoria girl slept with a few jocks while she was dating that Evan guy. I can't blame him for moving."
Evan was my ex, and we were friends before we started dating, before you ask, 'Who's Evan?' We broke up because, well, we found out that that 'love' was more of a brother-sister love, so, yeah. We're still friends, though. But he moved away just last year, causing rumors to start. That was one of them.
But I still got angry. I stood up, making my chair do a rather loud screech as it was pushed back. I could hear Namine scolding Kairi, but I walked to their desks, standing beside Kairi's. I could feel everyone stare at me, especially Kairi's boyfriend Sora. I bet he was worried what I was gonna do to her.
"If you have something to say about me, then say it to my face," I said quietly, but I knew she could hear me. Kairi sneered, "Oh, yeah? Then you're a whore. You slept with other men while you were dating Evan, little miss perfect. So you're not so perfect after all."
There were a few 'Ooh's, until a few seconds later when I snapped and slapped Kairi. "Bitch, whoever said I was perfect? I never cheated on Evan. He moved because his parents divorced and his father got custody of him, and his father already owned a house in England. By the way, do you have any proof I cheated on Evan? 'Cause you can totally phone him and ask. I don't care."
I slapped her again. "But I do care when you start some shit about me that ain't true! You're not perfect, either, Kairi! Get that through your fucking skull!" My voice was what most people considered 'normal talking level', but I always did talk more in a whisper. I wasn't that angry, 'cause when I'm angry, I really do yell. Like, yell-yell.
Kairi placed a hand on her cheek. Sora, being the boyfriend he is, exclaimed, "Hey! What did Kairi ever do to you?!"
I turned to him, and replied simply, "She fucked up my life." Namine shot a glare at Sora, then at Kairi, and grabbed her stuff and sat down in the empty desk next to me. "Ms. Crabtree, I'm sitting here for the rest of the year."
Ms. Crabtree nodded; it was obvious that Namine was her favorite student. Is she a pedophile or what? Maybe a lez pedo? I dunno. Maybe I'll find out later. Maybe she has a criminal record about molesting kids! You never know!
At the end of class, Namine sighed and walked over to me when we walked to our gym class with me. "I'm sorry for Kairi. I've been trying to tell her that you're not emo, but she won't listen to me. I'm afraid she'll only stop calling you emo when you turn 'popular' or stop covering your wrists. That means she'll probably wrip off the fishnet and bracelets."
I protectively clutched the bracelets on my right wrist with my left hand. "Nobody will touch my babies but me!" I stroked them and cooed, "Don't worry, my pretties, it's alright..." A few people that heard looked at me weirdly.
"Take a picture, it'll last longer!" Namine called over her shoulder, giggling. Oh, yeah, I pretty much got Namine to open up and become 'slightly' mean. Okay, mean enough to cuss. I can imagine the headline now, 'Local Highschooler Namine Was Seen Dealing Drugs To Her Friend Victoria, And Victoria Is Awaiting Trial.' Okay! I'm guilty! I corrupted her! Just not the extent of drugs - Kairi did that, I swear.
"Namine, thanks," I smiled at her. She smiled back. I never did tell you what she looked like, did I?
Well, she has really blond hair. But it was a light blond, like, one of those pretty ones. Not dark blond, not medium blond, and not to the extent of platinum blond, or white-blond. Or those fake blonds. Namine's hair was kind a soft mix of pale yellow and white, though more pale yellow than anything.
She has brilliant blue eyes, that are just entrancing! Oh, I should probably tell you, another reason I was 'shunned' by my peers was because I was bi.
"Vic" Namine sang as we neared the gym. "Nami, it's Tori, not Vic!" I complained, swatting her on the shoulder.
"Fine, Tori. What did Kairi do to fuck up your life even farther?" Namine asked, as we entered the girls' locker room. There were a few other girls inside, but they were the kind of cool ones; not at the bottom, not a social reject, but not at the top with the populars. One of them smiled and waved at Namine. It's not surprising, considering Namine had at least one friend in every group.
"I caught her cheating on Sora with my boyfriend at that time," I replied, taking out my gym shirt and the... whatever they're called! I switched the 'things' with short-shorts, that are just as good, 'cause our teacher was a pervert. Namine was always the one speaking up for me.
"Oh, seriously? Kairi's the whore, not you," Namine assured me, pulling off her shirt and hurriedly slipped on her gym shirt, which was dark blue with a red heart in the middle with wings. She knew I stared, but didn't really mind it; she knew, obviously, that I wasn't attracted to her that way. And I wasn't.
I shrugged and slipped off my hoodie, and Paramore T-shirt and replaced them with one of my hoodies with T-shirt-like sleeves. It was black with hearts and stars on it. Quite pretty, if I say so myself.
"Nice hoodie," Namine complimented from behind one of those stalls. Yeah, there were ones in the girls' locker room. Why? 'Cause... some girls are self-conscious, duh (I was about to think that they used it for smex!... Oh shit, I just did. Damn.). I slipped off my Converse and my jeans, then put on my short-shorts with my black-and-pink checkered Vans. Vans and Converse all the way, man!
"Thanks. Nice shirt," I replied, shrugging once again. "Yo, Nami, want me to go ahead? Two minutes till the bell."
"Yeah, go on ahead," Namine sighed. I bet she's having trouble with those 'things' again. She always did; I mean, she hated them, 'cause they made her butt look bigger. Her words, not mine. I said it made her ass look hot. But that's just the lez side of me talking. Meh, probably not, though.
"Okie dokie," I muttered, walking out of the girls' locker room into the gymnasium. It was, like, huge, and it even had a pool in it. In the center, actually. I think I know why... Our gym teacher, Mr. Bird, wanted to see us girls' butts as we either walked, scurried, or ran towards our locker room. The words 'pedophile' and 'molestor' come to mind, don't they?
He's just lucky we're fifteen; if we were older or younger, we'd totally slap that guy. But, sadly, this was only our second year here, and his first year teaching. So far it was the third day he's been teaching. He made us wear these uniforms, I guess you could say. I say it was something that turned him on. Okay, I now have mental images I really don't need...
"What'cha thinkin' about?" I practically jumped into the air when I heard that voice. I immediately backed away about ten meet, and just glared at him. He was such a pedo.
Uh, yeah, Mr. Bird, I'm talking to you.
Mr. Bird 'dramatically' took a step towards me, I took a step back. This continued until I was backed into a wall, and when Mr. Bird was within five feet of me, I screeched, "RAPE!" and kicked him where the sun don't shine, jogging over to where the cooler ones of Namine's group were. We weren't friends, merely acquaintances.
"Woah, Tori! That was sweet!" Roxas laughed, clapping me on the shoulder. I could faint right there; yeah, you got it right.
I had a crush on Roxas.
"Thanks," I smiled brightly at him. I can totally not stutter/stammer in the presence of crushes! It's a family trait, I guess. But if it's not, BRILL!
"Tori! You already kicked him?" Namine called out, pouting as she jogged towards us. She flashed me a thumbs-up when she noticed who I was talking to, and I blushed. Roxas blinked, obviously confused. I shook my head and pointed to Namine with one hand then the other I used the 'crazy' motion.
Roxas snickered and nodded. He totally accepted that lame excuse. Could it do with Sora...? Well, one thing's for sure (at least, to me it is):
I think he's caught some of Sora's stupidity.
"Hey! No mentally insulting your crush!" Namine smacked me on the back of the head. Dude, ish she a mindreader or what?! Namine huffed and replied, "I'm not a mind-reader, dumbass. You just happen to be muttering your thoughts." Oh, shit.
"'Oh, shit' is right," Namine snickered, pointing at Roxas and Riku, who looked completely clueless. I breathed a sigh of relief; Namine was the only one who heard me. Thank God.
"You don't believe in God?" Riku questioned, looking at me weirdly.
I started believing in Him since the first year of high school. I've been praying and stuff, but I think He hates me. He's sent nothing but bad luck my way. I shrugged and replied, "I believe in Him, it's just that He doesn't seem to like me much." Yeah, damn Him to Hell. ... Oh shit! What if the Devil gets horny again?! I UNDAMN GOD TO HELL!
"You have the weirdest thoughts," Namine whispered. I stuck my tongue out at her, flipping her off. Namine flipped me off in return. Oh yeah, we're totally badass.
I whispered to Namine, "I'm skipping. Tell whoever asks where I am, that I was about to be molested by Mr. Bird and you helped me. I'll be in the locker room chattin' with my buddies." Namine nodded and I ran quickly to the locker room, locking both doors, knowing that everyone else was in the gym.
I quickly turned on my laptop and waited as it loaded, eating some pocky. Cool, it was chocolate flavored. Ooh, cool. It's finally on. I went onto the IM thingy, and logged on. I was immediately invited to a chatroom by my buddy Haley, who's alias was Miya on there. Ooh, cool, Felix is there too. I call him Elli, just to annoy him.
FallingEndlessly signed on
FallingEndlessly: yo wut up peepz!
NekoMiya: OMG did u skip gym and birdie?!
FallingEndlessly: ttly he almost molested me
FelixThe Poet: lol what'd u do?
FallingEndlessly: kicked him where teh sun don't shine. worked perfectly
NekoMiya: lol coolio! i'mma invite nightley cuz she just got on besides u need 2 add her
NekoNightley signed on
NekoNightley: OMGOMGOMGOMG TORI!! glomp
FallingEndlessly: lol haiii xD glomps bk
FallingEndlessly: i just realized.. a glomp ish a tackle and a hump O.o
NekoNightley: ... immediately backs away from Tori .
NekoMiya: xDD lol tori now look wut u did!
FelixThe Poet: lol tori itz ok xD hugs Tori
FallingEndlessly: lol xD hugz bk just be sure not to cheat on miya or... wutz her name... . i forget already
FelixThe Poet: its Akemi dumbass. xD
NekoNightley: lol so wutz up guys?
FallingEndlessly: Skipping gym class 2 be here xD
FelixThe Poet: Ditching. xD
NekoMiya: sitting in teh bathroom with my laptop... .
FallingEndlessly: OMG XD dies of laughter OMG OMG I NEED CPR!! OO
FelixThe Poet: does CPR lol ur alive now xD
FallingEndlessly: ish alive HEY! don't cheat on your gfz bud pokez Elli
FelixThe Poet: DON'T CALL ME ELLI .
FallingEndlessly: wut else would i call u? felix?
FelixThe Poet: Preferrably -.-
FallingEndlessly: OMG anime-cries ELLI HATEZ MEEEEEE
NekoNightley: OMG TORI ITZ OK D: hugz Tori
NekoMiya: HEY! smacks Felix let her call u elli dammit!!
FelixThe Poet: TT Fine.. but only becuz i'm being abused..
FallingEndlessly: whisper he'd ttly be an uke in a yaoi comic
FelixThe Poet: chokes on air I WOULDN'T BE THE UKE!
NekoMiya: Suuuuure you wouldn't xD
NekoNightley: uh-huh right xD
FallingEndlessly: Just keep tellin urself that xD
FelixThe Poet: i feel so loved TT
FelixThe Poet signed off
FallingEndlessly: lol poor elli. shit the bellz gonna ring and i gotta change!! ttyl guyz, luv yahhhh blowz kisses bbl
NekoMiya: ily2 xD blowz kisses bk
FallingEndlessly signed off
I sighed and changed clothes really fast. By the way, NekoMiya was obviously Haley, alias Miya. FelixThe Poet was Felix, whom I call Elli. I have yet to know Nightley's real name...
I'm totally different online than I am in real life. On there, I'm hyper, random, loud, and always makes my presence known. Here, though, I'm quiet, a social reject, doesn't make my presence known, and only show my true self to friends. Friends I know won't ditch me. Like Namine.
I walked out with my laptop in my bag. Namine yelled out, "TORI!" Did she have sugar?! I looked back at her and she motioned towards her table. My eyes widened. Oh my God. What she was telling me was to eat lunch with her and her friends! The populars!
I shook my head and pointed at where I usually sit. I had a few other friends, but not as close as me and Namine. I'm working on it, though. Namine sighed and nodded, turning back to her friends. I sat down where I usually sit: across from Zexion, next to Demyx, and diagonal from Axel. Uh, yeah, so that basically adds up to four friends.
"So, what up homies?" I asked, taking out a peanut-butter sandwich. I took out my Coke bottle and chugged like half, and I pulled out four cans of Monsters. "Take one, each of ya." Axel hurriedly grabbed one, Demyx grinned and took one, and I had to push one towards Zexion, 'cause he was way into his book.
Must be interesting.
Maybe it's porno?
Ew, must not think that way. ... Nasty images.
I opened my Monster and chugged like a quarter of it, and I coughed. "Dude, someone's talkin' 'bout me."
"That's only when you sneeze," Zexion corrected, only to have me sneeze. I quirked an eyebrow at him and smirked; he sighed in defeat. I totally win.
"How's our favorite little stalkin'-Roxas-pyro doin'?" I asked, grinning at Axel. He grinned back. "Awesome. I got Roxas to talk to me!"
"If he talked to you, that must mean he likes you!" I grinned.
I should tell you about them, shouldn't I?
Okay. Zexion had silvery-blue hair with bangs that covered his right eye, and he almost always had a book with him. He's the bookworm. He sometimes had rectangular, rimless glasses on; makes you wonder how bad his eyesight is, huh? He had blue eyes... I think. Looked like blue last time I checked.
Demyx was the hyperactive, naive guy a kid should be like. He had dirty blond hair (the kind of dirty blond that's more brown than blond) in a mullet with bright blue eyes. He was really childish, but that's what makes him lovable. He and Zexion are pretty much rejected in their peers (they're like, a year older than me, so a grade above me) because they're gay.
Axel, Axel, Axel. He had fiery-red hair that stuck out in every direction and sparkling green eyes. It was like life was a game he wasn't going to lose. He loved to play pranks, and he was gay, too, so he was basically rejected in his year too (he's in the same grade as Zexion and Demyx).
He obsessed over Roxas, but I never did get jealous, 'cause, obviously, Axel had almost no chance with Roxas because Roxas was already interested in someone, according to a talk with Sora, Kairi, and Namine. It was recorded.
"Yo, Tor!" Marluxia, one of the populars and completely obsessed with me, sang, skipping (yes, skipping...) over to us. I sighed and swallowed my sandwich, then chugged some of my Coke again. "Marly, I'm sorry, but I'm interested in someone else. I'm not ruining my chances with him because it says that he's interested in someone who's gender is unknown, so I might have a chance with him."
"Aww," Marluxia pouted, then brightened. "You called me Marly! Oh my God Tori, thank you!!" He basically glomped me. Remember what I said when I was IMing, where a glomp was a tackle and a hump? Yeah...
I could've sworn I saw Roxas glare at him, but when I blinked, Roxas was talking to Namine. Weird. It was probably a trick of the light. "Marly, please stop glomping me. A glomp is a tackle and a hump."
"Then I'll make sure to glomp you more!" Marluxia grinned, getting off me and helping me up. I groaned as I sat back down; Marluxia skipped back to his table, talking animatedly with them. He was in the same grade as Zexion, Demyx, and Axel. I should totally give them a name. Hmm, how about... Zemel! Sure, that'll do.
If I was added in there then it'd be Zemelri (pronounced, 'zem-el-ree'). I chugged the rest of my Coke and sighed, eating potato chips that seemed to come out of nowhere. "Who do you think would be an uke in a yaoi comic?"
"Demyx," Zexion and Axel replied in unision. Demyx started anime-crying. "WAHH! Tori! They're being mean again!" He then hugged me like I was his mother. I sweat-dropped. I'm a mother figure to someone older than me. That's... That's just messed up.
"What the hell?" I mouthed to Axel. Axel shrugged. I could've sworn that Roxas was glaring heatedly at Demyx, and I blinked a few times, to see Roxas turning back. Maybe he did glare this time. Wonder what's making him glare?
"Lunch's gonna end soon," I sighed, pushing Demyx off me. He fell on the floor but quickly got up, grinning insanely.
Okay, who the hell gave him sugar?
"Tori, you're staring at Roxas again," Zexion pointed out just as Roxas turned back. I blushed and glared at Zexion. "Do you want me to call you Zexy?!"
Zexion sighed as Axel and Demyx burst out laughing. "SEXY ZEXY!!"
"YEAH! I'LL FINALLY HAVE TORI ALL TO MYSELF!" Demyx cackled.
"NO YOU WON'T!" They procede to have a finger-sword fight. "I'LL HAVE HER!"
"Last time I checked, you loved Roxas!" Demyx smirked.
Woah, since when was Demyx smart?!
"... SO?!" Demyx poked Axel, and Axel fell to the floor dramatically. "Tori! Before I die, FUCK ME NOW! I don't wanna die when I haven't fucked twenty girls yet!"
The whole lunchroom stared at Axel. It wasn't every day when someone randomly shouted, 'FUCK ME!' It's funny, though.
I smirked at him. "I told you, I'm saving myself for him."
Axel pouted. "If you get him then how will I get him?" I giggled then kissed his forehead as he sat up. "It's a contest of love, my dear Axel," I smirked, flipping him off.
"Oh, yeah?!" Axel glared at me. "THEN I DECLARE WAR!"
"I CALL NAMINE, ROXAS, RIKU, ZEXION, DEMYX, MARLUXIA, YUFFIE, SQUALLY, CLOUD, AERITH, TIFA, AND THE FRIENDS I HAVE ON MSN!" I yelled out.
"I CALL EVERYONE ELSE WE KNOW THAT YOU HAVEN'T CALLED OUT YET!" Axel shouted.
"I'll totally have Haley, Elli, and Nightley kick your ass," I smirked, looking down at my nails. Right now they were black. I should totally get rainbow nail polish. Meh, I'll paint them rainbow later. Oh, yeah. Axel's ranting now.
The bell has saved the day! I quickly walked out of the lunchroom while Axel still ranted. I don't think he noticed I left. I can totally be a ninja.
A/N: … -coff- no that isn't my real username on MSN. So don't try. A;;