Hiya! Ooh, I've got the lovely jumpy feeling of starting a new story. And I'm SO EXCITED about this! Yes, It's the story I've been itching to write since I first encountered this play in English one normal Tuesday last year. So yes, I'm combining my two loves: Doctor Who and William Shakespeare. So I present to you now, my DW version of Much Ado About Nothing!

Pleeeeease don't run for the hills when you hear that it's Shakespeare, because I assure you this is gonna be anything but boring. There'll be no Thees and Thous, not a Forsooth in sight, this is in a completely modern setting (Cardiff, to be exact), with the characters you all love being their usual wonderful selves. I just... nicked the Bard's storyline slightly. Okay, a lot. But you don't need to be familiar with the play to enjoy this, don't need to have ever heard a word of it in your life. Just give it a go, and be a bit patient.

Not meaning to be demanding and diva-ish, but I'd adore a teensy weensy review just to see what you thought. Ciao!

Donna xxx

Okay, this story is in a pretty AU setting, so I'll just explain where everyone is at the start of this fic.

The Doctor Is travelling as usual with Donna.

Donna Is with the Doctor on the TARDIS as normal.

Rose Is trapped on the parallel universe after Doomsday , there has been no TL, TSE or JE.

Jack, Ianto and Gwen Work at Torchwood like they always have. We can assume Tosh and Owen are dead, because they're not in this story (sorry if you're all T/O lovers).

Martha Has travelled with the Doctor in the past, she now works at Torchwood as a doctor (sort of instead of Owen).

Mickey Also works at Torchwood. I don't know how he isn't trapped on Pete's World too, but it was essential to the plot that he be at Torchwood. He works on the computers (sort of instead of Toshiko).

Chapter One - An Intruder

"Jack, seriously, remind me never to let you do the talking again when we're faced with a monster," Gwen sighed, flopping down gratefully into a seat as soon as they arrived back at the Hub.

"Aw, come on, Like I knew it would react like that!" the Captain cried in an attempt to defend himself, "I'd never seen one of them before!"

"And let's hope we don't see one again." Ianto groaned, collapsing alongside Gwen, "Bloody thing was furious, I've never run so fast in my life!"

"Jeez, life and soul o' the party, you two." Jack muttered, rolling his eyes, "Liven up, guys, we defeated the thing! 'Tis gone, voila, never again to be seen lurking in the old warehouses of Cardiff. You should be glad!"

"I'm too tired to be glad of anythin' right now." Gwen yawned, "God, I need a coffee." She said her last sentence louder, and glanced meaningfully over at Ianto, her eyes wide, innocent and blinking rapidly.

"No." he said immediately, shaking his head, "Nuh uh. I'm as tired as you are, not gonna happen. Get someone else to make it. Mickey, maybe?"

Gwen sighed yet again, and looked imploringly over at Mickey, but it seemed at this moment he had more important things on his mind. He called sharply over to them from his position at a computer.

"Oi Jack! Gwen, Ianto, get over here!" he looked panicked, "Now's not the time for coffee - we've got an intruder."

At this, their playful expressions were instantly replaced with serious ones, and all three were up like a shot and over by the computer where Mickey sat.

"Take a look at that." he said seriously, spinning a monitor around so they could all see the live CCTV footage. The screen was split into four, each quarter showing a different section of the Torchwood Hub. The bottom two sections were still, merely showing an empty corridor and an office. The top right corner showed the medical bay, where Martha Jones stood, wearing a white lab coat, examining a clipboard.

This was all perfectly normal, but the other corner, the top left, caught the team's attention straight away. It showed one of the storage facilities in the very lower levels of the Hub, deep underground. The image was fuzzy and monochrome, but they could still make out a woman, looking around at her surroundings with apparent great confusion.

Jack immediately sprung to attention, slipping easily back into the role of leader and firing questions at Mickey.

"Can you get a bigger, clearer picture up, we can't really get a good look at her like this."

"Sorry, boss, this is as clear as it's gonna get."

Jack clenched his fists in frustration and took a deep breath as if to calm himself.

"Well, can we at least get some colour on there, see what this girl looks like?"

"That ain't gonna happen either, Captain. Weirdly enough, that camera's the only faulty one in the whole place, so we're stuck with black and white."

"Doesn't matter." Gwen decided, leaning closer to get a better look, "She's blonde, I can tell that much. I can always spot a blonde a mile off."

Ianto choked back a laugh, whilst Jack just looked irate.

"Guys, there's no time for this! Now seeing as this idiot…" he rapped Mickey on the head, "…can't even get us a clear bit of CCTV footage, we're doing this the old fashioned way. Gwen, grab a gun, you're coming down with me. Mickey, Ianto, stay up here, watch that girl like a hawk."

He paused for breath for a moment, pressing a button on his watch.


On the screen, they saw the doctor look up, and hold a finger to her earpiece.

"Yes, Jack?"

"Get up here, we've got a situation. NOW!"

"Got it."

They watched her put down the notes she had been consulting and leave the room before Jack and Gwen made a move.

"Keep safe." Jack said to them, and then clicked his fingers in the direction of the computer screen, "And keep an eye."

With that, he and Gwen headed straight to the door that led out of the main room, that led to the lower levels.

"You be careful!" Gwen heard Ianto's distant call and smiled to herself, before speeding up so she was level with Jack.

"Was that storage bay at the very bottom?" she asked, and Jack gave a grim nod.

"Whoever this girl is, she wants to make things difficult for us. Although, she did look confused... I don't know, Gwen." he paused with a smile, "At least we know she's not all cyber-ed up, like the last girl we found down in that bay."

They continued to hurry through the corridors and down countless stairs, talking breathlessly as they did so.

"I felt so sorry for Ianto after that whole thing with Lisa." Gwen admitted, but Jack merely shrugged.

"Seemed kind of a stupid thing to do, if you ask me."

"He really loved 'er, though. I guess he was just blinded by that... you must know the feeling, Jack."

"I don't know what you mean."

He raised his eyebrows at her.

"Well, you know." she said incredulously, "When you love someone so, so much that you'd do anythin' for them. Absolutely anythin', just like what Ianto did for Lisa."

"Love?" he asked in a mocking tone, and although Gwen didn't think it possible, Jack's eyebrows got even higher, "Whatever."

"Wh-" Gwen began, but she didn't have any time to ponder Jack's strange words before he called back to her.

"This is the one."

The two of them were immediately focused, their previous conversation forgotten entirely. They both raised their guns, and stood directly outside the door Jack had meant in utter silence.

As the adrenaline coursed through her veins and her heart thumped, Gwen forgot all about how exhausting this day had been so far. She forgot her aching feet, still without shoes even though the floor beneath them was icy cold. She forgot these things because they didn't matter, because this was all that mattered, this job, and everything else became insignificant. They were Torchwood. This was what they did, and that was that.

Her eyes met Jack's, who gave the tiniest of nods.

"Three... Two... One..." she mouthed, and then the two of them sprung into action. The door flew open, and they burst into the room with their guns raised, Jack crying: "FREEZE!"

The girl who stood with her back to them jumped violently- Gwen had been right; she was indeed blonde - before slowly turning around to face them. Gwen was surprised to see that the girl (who on closer inspection looked to be around twenty-five years old) was grinning widely as her eyes briefly met Gwen's, before fixing on Jack's.

"Captain Jack Harkness." the girl said slowly, savoring every word with what could only be described as glee in her voice. Majorly confused, Gwen turned to Jack, whose gun clattered to the floor and who had gone as white as a sheet, an expression of bewilderment and amazement on his face.

"It's actually you." he muttered quietly, quickly, almost to himself. But the girl heard him alright, for she gave a nod.

"Oh yes." she said, appearing to be enjoying herself greatly although Gwen, mystified, couldn't see why.

And then suddenly, without any warning, Jack's face split into a huge grin. He dashed forwards, and scooped this mysterious woman into a bone-crushing hug, spinning her around on the spot.

"Jesus, Jack!" the girl gasped as they finally broke apart, clutching her side but with a huge smile on her face, "It's not that amazing that I'm here!"

"Not that amazing? Not that... But you're... He said you were..."

He didn't know what to say. For once in his life, Jack, the man who had a witty remark for absolutely every occasion, was completely speechless.

"Oh, I know what he said." the girl said, impatiently waving a hand, "But like I was gonna let that stop me."

Only now did Gwen think to lower her gun, she had been too busy witnessing the extraordinary events before her. She had absolutely no clue who this girl was, or what she and Jack were talking about. Feeling slightly foolish, Gwen didn't know what to do with herself as the blonde and the Captain shared a moment.

He looked down at her for a few seconds, shaking his head in apparent joy and disbelief, and finally he spoke.

"I can't believe it, Rose. I honestly cannot believe this."

Now this is just for any lush folks who do know the play. Can you guess which Much Ado characters will be portrayed by which Whovians in this story (Note Jack's cynical opinion on love...)? Cyber-hugs if you can. Thanks again!

Donna xxx