Disclaimer: I do not own Azumanga Daioh

Salt
By Silver Sailor Ganymede

It was only Monday, and already Yomi was wondering whether it was possible to go through the week without something idiotic happening at lunchtime. She had retreated to the cafeteria for once in order to get some peace, but unfortunately two-thirds of the Numbnuts (said two thirds being Tomo and Kagura) had decided to follow her, completely ruining her plan.

Said Numbnuts were now sitting opposite Yomi: Kagura splashing curry sauce everywhere as she attempted to eat her udon, and Tomo playing with the salt container for some reason Yomi could not – and did not want to fathom.

"Tomo, what are you doing with the thing?" she asked when she could take the other girl's antics no longer.

"I wanna steal the salt," came the reply.

Yomi looked up at Tomo, completely confused. "What are you on about now?"

"I. Want. To. Steal. The. Salt," Tomo said, speaking very slowly as if she were trying to explain a complicated concept to a small child.

Yomi groaned. "Why do you want to do that?"

"I need it," Tomo said, shrugging, then moved to put the whole container of salt in her bag. Yomi snatched it off her.

"Tomo, you do not steal the salt in the container."

"Yeah, you just put some in a napkin and take it," Kagura piped up through a mouthful of food.

"Right, because that makes it all so much better…" Yomi drawled.

"What do you need salt for anyway?" Kagura asked.

"Aaah, now that would be telling," Tomo said, a manic grin creeping onto her face.

"Tomo," Yomi snapped, "What do you need salt for. Tell me."

Tomo flinched at the look of irritation that had appeared in Yomi's eyes and then decided it would be wise to speak. "Well Osaka told me that if you put salt in coke, it makes it fizz all over the place."

Yomi stared at her blankly. Kagura blinked and then burst out laughing.

"What? What's so funny?!"

"The fact that you're listening to Osaka," Kagura replied. "You put sugar in coke to make it fizz more, not salt!"

Tomo looked at Kagura in astonishment for a second, then another, even more evil grin reared its ugly head.

"Yomi…"

"What?"

"I wanna steal the sugar!"

Kagura sighed. Yomi groaned. Tomo dropped the salt container on the floor.

"Oops..."