Disclaimer: I own a kitten. :) But Harry Potter? No. :(

Warnings: Complete and utter randomness and the pulling of strings to make Hogwarts have a Breast Cancer Awareness assembly. Because... uhm... cancer can't be cured by magic? It's my creative license; leave me alone!

James Potter and Sirius Black sat side by side outside of the Great Hall where the 6th and 7th year females of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry were currently having an assembly on Breast Cancer Awareness.

"Men can get breast cancer, too!" Sirius complained loudly, "I wish to exercise my right to breast cancer awareness!"

James simply rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to the large oak doors.

Any minute now... this assembly's been going on for well over an hour...

As if reading his thoughts, the doors to the Great Hall burst open, giving way to the flood of young witches muttering excitedly amongst themselves.

Sirius took this as his cue to run off and attempt to flirt with random girls.


"Hey, do you need me to feel your breast for you? You may have a lump."

James cringed as the resonating sound of a slap echoed throughout the large hall.

"Oi, Potter!"


James quickly turned, a smile plastered on his face at the sound of the voice of his ladylove, Lily Evans.

Smirking she came to stand directly in front of him.

"How are you this fine evening, Lily-flower?"

"Don't call me that," she snapped, ignoring his question.

After a brief moment, a wicked smile passed over her face.

"Oi, Potter, would you like to squeeze my breast?"

James Potter felt his jaw drop and his eyes bug slightly out of his head.

"Wh-what?" he stammered, taking a shaky step back.

"I asked you if you would like to squeeze my breast, silly!" she laughed, taking another step towards him.

"I-you-we-but you..." James spluttered uselessly.

Suddenly, Lily reached into her bag and pulled out a small box.

"I said," she reiterated, holding out a small, blue rubber breast model, "Would you like to squeeze my breast?"

She pressed the small breast into his hand and walked away merrily, linking arms with her friends as she passed them.

A/N: I know... it's been ages since I've written anything and this is all I could come up with? (You Broke The Crayon, Naminé doesn't totally count.) Well, we had a breast cancer assembly in school today and they gave us little gel-y breasts. Inspiration! Yay?

Anyway, I'll try to write more in the future. I've been busy with, well, life.

Psst: It's my birthday in two days. I like reviews. A review would be a lovely present.

Oh, and I'm trying to think of a name for my new kitten. Selena, Sabrina, Persephone, Yuna, Artemis, and Olette are my favorites. (Props to anyone who can tell me where that last one is from. :D) Tell me your preference in a REVIEW! :)