A sort of collab with Raggedy, or Funderful, or whatever she calls herself on the intertubes now. -go check out her fics plllzz- Anyway, we decided that BakuraxDuel Disk is oh so very hot, and needs to be written. SO I DID IT BECAUSE I'M A FUCKED UP HO. Love us. And it's cheesy and cracky on purpose. What do you expect from a pairing like this?

Bakura turned away in disgust as the stupid boy cowering before him cried and whined for his duel disk. Worthless human… There was nothing that special about the metal object. Well, sure, it was the basis for which the game was played, but- Bakura made a 'hmpf' noise, growing tired of musing over the stupid object. Honestly, all he needed it for was to gain entrance to the Finals, and finish his deal with Malik.

"Now, let's see what kind of cards you have…" He grinned, excited to see what else he could pilfer. But his smile instantly dropped when he saw how lack luster they were. "What!? You call yourself a duelist!? Disgusting!"

"My cards! How will I ever manage to get to the Finals now!?"

Rolling his eyes at the moaning, pitiful boy before him at his feet, Bakura scoffed and began to walk away, his new duel disk glinting brightly underneath the street posts that lined Domino's streets.


"How do you work this stupid thing!?" Bakura growled in annoyance as he tried, for the fifth thing, to insert his deck into the machine. Failing every time, he had grown increasingly mad at the duel disk for making him feel stupid, and had had enough of it. Gritting his teeth as he tried, and failed once again, to jam his cards into the slot, Bakura yelled and chucked the duel disk to the ground in front of him.

Seething, Bakura slumped back onto the park bench, crossing his arms in anger. He had always been good at brooding, and used his talent to his full advantage as he glared in hatred at the metal object. Tapping his foot repeatedly, he sighed, and tried to calm himself down. He never thought well when he was angry, and losing control over such a small thing was not good. Deeming himself okay to try again, and this time not become homicidal like he had done previously, Bakura stood up. Turning around, Bakura checked for other people, finding none. Perfect…

He was all alone… Not that… he had any reason to want to be alone, or anything…

Bakura licked his lips as his eyes trailed to the discarded duel disk behind him. He never noticed quite how magnificently it shined in the moonlight; the way the cold, lifeless metal sparkled was quite alluring- No! He couldn't get like that! He remembered the last time-!! And it had started the same way. Bakura was never a calm person, and when he forced himself to calm down, he calmed down in a… different way. Tearing his eyes away from the duel disk, he gulped, a slight flush creeping up into his face.

But he couldn't stop looking. He had to keep his eyes onto it. It called to him from the ground, begging him to take pleasure from it. He could almost it's lifeless throb pulse through the ground, racing up his body. Bakura's hands shook next to his sides and he gulped. There were… things he had thought of… And now that he finally had one, it would be the perfect time to… experiment.

Turning around fully, Bakura tried to regain his superior demeanor, but he knew that the duel disk knew that he was growing weak under it's faceless gaze. He walked two short steps before kneeling, and reached out a shaky hand to touch it.

Bakura shivered when the tips of his fingers made contact with the metal, chilled by the deep night, causing him to shudder again. His heart beat fast, causing his warm blood to race faster through himself, contrasting the cold, lifeless metal of the disk. But, oh… how lovely it looked in the moonlight, how alluring… How much he wanted continue touching it more and more…

"You know…" His eyes were lowered as he sat down fully onto the ground and moved both hands to touch the object. "You're much more worthy of me then any pathetic human is…"

The disk seemed to agree, because directly after he spoke, the machine started to make a whirring noise. Bakura's eyes widened before figuring out that it was the sound of the card shuffler. Picking up the duel disk, Bakura set it on his lap, and moaned as the object vibrated, the mechanic shuffling sounding erotic to his ears. It seemed to beg for his pleasure, and Bakura was all too willing to give in.

After all, Bakura had always, since he had first seen the Duel Disk, been curious as to how tight the wrist band could adjust. …On something that definitely was not his wrist.

Picking up the object again, Bakura's face was flushed fully as he stared into it's cold, faceless surface, and then turned his head with a jerk. Human emotions were vastly overrated. Love, love? He did not love the thing. But he did love the way that it made his body feel as it vibrated and continued to shuffle on his lap. However, once he removed it, the shuffling sound went away instantly. But his erection, did not.

He had let himself get so flustered, so hot, so quickly. It was wrong, that was what Ryou was telling him subconsciously as he pressed his lips to the cold metal of the circular base. But Bakura didn't care. Because if it was wrong to gain pleasure from this thing, then it was certainantly not wrong to think about his host at night, like Ryou told him to do. Shaking his head, Bakura rid his mind of such thoughts, and returned to the true holder of his attention.

"What an admirer I am…" His voice was hot and dripping with lust as his right hand left to slowly begin to unbutton his pants. "Look at your smooth surface, your sharp edges… So quiet… You're everything that I could ask for. Oh yes, yes… Start doing that again…" Bakura let out an approving moan as the duel disk began to whirr softly again.

His pants were restricting, and Bakura groaned louder when he finally unbuttoned them and pulled them down, freeing his erection. The whirring sound increased as if anxious for the pleasure he would receive, and Bakura laid back against the grass, setting the duel disk on his abdomen, keeping on hand on his cock, and the other moving Ryou's shirt up his chest to tweak one of his nipples. Letting out a soft moan, Bakura closed his eyes and moved his head to the side, opening his mouth slightly. The object vibrating on top of him approved at his actions, and the vibrations became longer and more forceful. They sent bouts of pleasure through his body, and Bakura could no longer keep from touching himself. He needed it then!

His hands shaky with anticipating the pleasure that was about the come, Bakura lifted his hands to pick up the duel disk one last time. Running his hands over the smooth surface, his heart beat wild with lust as he felt the indentions of the lines, the skilled craftsmanship. So sexy… He loved the way that the light glistened off of it's red card slot, red like his cheeks, red like a rose… So beautiful… He needed it so bad. So with renewed confidence, Bakura unclasped the wrist band, and wrapped it around his erection, almost screaming in pleasure as he snapped it shut, and it moved to fit to his size.

Throwing his head back, Bakura clawed at the ground in ecstasy as the duel disk hummed frantically, running his hands over his body, the pleasure coursing through his body. This felt much better then his hand did! And Bakura didn't care when Ryou became angry in the back of their mind when he admitted loving the feeling of the object over that of his hand, all he cared about was the euphoric pleasure, and how to increase it.

Curling his fingers around the edges of the dueling slide and the card holder, Bakura held it in place as he began to thrust his hips upward, letting out pleasured moans. His eyes closed, he opened them instantly as flashes of yellow and red met his closed eyelids. Looking down in a confused sexual haze, he saw the life points rise with his every thrust, the lights blipping in rhythm as it let out approving beeps. The sound erotic, Bakura was eager to show the machine how much he appreciated and lusted for it, and increased his thrusts.

The wristband was just so tight! It slid up and down his erection, tightening and loosening in just the right places, the vibrations only amplifying the feeling. His fingers gripped the machine as Bakura gasped when it tightened more, his eyes rolling up at the absolute feeling of euphoria. He could feel the metal on his flesh, on his legs, on his abdomen. He could feel the sharp edges and the smooth finish! He could feel it all, yes, YES! More, more! There had to be more! He wanted to feel all of it, all of it!

Beeping over and over, and trying desperately to match the tempo the duel disk had set, Bakura gasped and moaned again instantly after. His muscles began to tense and his thighs began to feel shaky, his cock dripping with precum as Bakura felt his orgasm increasing. Crying out, knowing that his climax would reach much too soon due to the over stimulation, he pressed his finger down hard on a small button, the 'eject' button. The wristband tightening more then it ever had, Bakura screamed and thrust up one last time, reaching his end.

His body tensed all over as he climaxed, cumming all over his stomach and onto parts of the disk. His mouth was open long after the vocalized, and Bakura slumped down in an orgasmic haze upon the grass, breathing deeply as the beeps subsided. Everything was so hot and wet as his fingers twitched, exhausted and in absolute heaven. He had known that there was a reason why he listened to Malik… He supposed that if he had not made the deal with him, he would have never been able to get the duel disk, and would have never felt what he was feeling at that moment. Limbs lethargic with receding pleasure, Bakura slowly undid the wristband off of his limp penis, and moved the duel disk to lay it next to his head.

Turning his head to look at it, some of the lights were still flickering faintly, and he scowled when he saw the white globs on it. Dammit, how was he ever supposed to get the cards in, then!? Bakura didn't think that his deck would be enhanced when it had sticky substances on it.

Review or I'll write Yami no Assface, I mean Yami no Yuugi fucking a frying pan. While burning. So it'll burn his dick off. Or maybe you're a guro fan like me, and are into sick shit like that, and then in that case, I'll write a fic where he skips gaily through a field of tulips.