Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. Or Edward – Or Robert – Damn it.
Edward was so frustrating. I understood all of the reasons we were waiting to have sex. Yes, I was only seventeen, but so was he. Yes, my dad was a cop – and would most likely kill us both if he found out. And yes, I was still a virgin.
What Edward didn't seem to understand was that I had been in love with him for the past three years. When he'd kissed me last night and I looked up into his green eyes, I'd melted. Which is exactly why now, as I sat here on my bed, all I could think was, He's so… so frustrating!
Of course we'd made out before. He'd been my boyfriend for the last six months for cripes' sake, so naturally we'd made out in the school library, in his car, at his house, and at mine.
We'd just never made out at night – in the dark – on my bed. In fact, we'd never made out on a bed before. Sure, we'd made out in his room, and mine for that matter, but Edward had a leather couch and I have a little loveseat, and they both made for excellent places to… you know. What I didn't know was how last night had ended so badly…
It had started out like any other night. Charlie, my father, went down to the beach in La Push, the local reservation, to go late night fishing with his best friend Billy Black. He'd told me not to wait up for him, claiming he was going to spend the night at Billy's to get a head start on their usual five am Saturday morning fishing.
"Dad, why are you fishing at night if you're also fishing in the morning?" I'd asked him, amused that he was lying to me. I knew the real reason he was going over there. Getting a "head start" meant that he and Billy would stay up all night drinking, and then go fishing.
"Bells, you'll never understand," he replied. "Fishing and beer to me and Billy equal John Hughes' movies and nail polish to you and Alice. Speaking of Alice… Is she going to spend the night here, or are you going to head over there?" he tentatively asked.
Alice had my best friend since we were little, and Charlie knew our weekend routine well. He knew it especially well now, because for the last six months, Alice only ever came over to my house for sleepovers.
You see, Alice just happened to be Edward's sister, and Charlie didn't really like the idea of his practically-grown daughter sleeping next door to her seventeen-year-old boyfriend's room. If he only knew there was nothing to worry about – at least not when it came to Edward. Me, on the other hand… Well, that was a different story.
"Alice is coming over here, dad," I answered, pairing my words with a roll of my eyes.
"Oh okay," he'd replied, sounding relieved. "Well, you girls have fun and call the station if you can't reach me on my cell, alright?"
"Okay dad, but I'm sure we'll be just fine. What could possibly go wrong with Alice looking over me?" I chuckled at the thought.
"You're right, Bella. Alice may be small, but I wouldn't get on her bad side if you paid me to – and I'm a cop," he said, laughing at the thought as well.
It was true. Even though Alice was short and spritely in nature, I'd seen her take down a fully grown man with one strike to the groin. A few months ago while shopping in Port Angeles, the salesman at the store we were at got a rude awakening when he walked into her dressing room.
You simply didn't cross Alice Cullen… especially when she was shopping. Just thinking about trying to stop her when she was determined to shop sent a chill down my spine.
"Have fun dad," I called out while he drove off into the night.
He had just turned the corner at the end of the right side of the street when I heard a very loud rumble coming from the left end.
That's just great, I thought to myself. I knew that Alice and Jasper were going to make out on the couch all night, especially when they found out that Charlie was gone. They loved that I had a single parent who was married to his job, and to his favorite pastime – fishing.
As for me, I hated it. I'd been the third wheel around the two lovebirds until Edward had finally gotten a clue and asked me out six months ago. I'd been shocked when he did, because even though I liked him, okay, loved him – and how could I not – I'd just assumed he'd thought of me simply as his sister's friend.
When he did ask me out, he'd explained that he had liked me all as long as I had, but figured I simply thought of him as my friend's brother. He told me that he'd caught me looking at him one night during a sleepover, and finally plucked up the courage to ask me out.
Jasper's rumbling truck brought me out of my sweet memory, and as he pulled up in the driveway, I could see that he was already attached to Alice at the mouth.
I knew it would only get worse when they found out that Charlie was going to be out for the whole night…
I'd been wrong – it was worse than I could have imagined. Alice squealed when I told her of Charlie's all-night fishing plan, and she'd thrown herself at Jasper on the couch. Their hands immediately started exploring each other's bodies as if there were no one else in the room.
I'd immediately made it so there was no one else in the room by sulking up to my bedroom. I shoved the ear buds of my iPod into my ears and immediately turned up the volume to drown out the moans that were already making their way up the stairs.
When I threw myself onto the bed and closed my eyes, I guess my quiet, calm playlist of some of Edward's favorite songs lulled me to sleep. To say I'd been surprised to be woken up a few hours later was an understatement. I couldn't wrap my head around why Alice had unglued herself from Jasper to come upstairs and shake me awake. I mean, if she wanted me to move over then she should have just nudged me. Just when I was about to scoot over, I realized that I was already on the far side of the bed.
"Go away Alice," I groaned. "Just let me sleep so I don't have to hear you mack on your boyfriend," I said, turning my back toward her.
When I felt two strong hands turn me over, I thought, For such a little thing, she sure is strong... I knew I was going to have to fight back, so I moved my hands in her direction, intent on pushing her off of my bed. I was so surprised to hit a solid, muscular chest instead of Alice's petite frame that my eyes flew open in shock.
They were instantly drawn to the most beautiful sight. Edward sat on my bed, and in the moonlight I could see a sly grin upon his full lips.
I couldn't help but smile back up at that grin, but in my groggy state, I wasn't sure if I was awake or dreaming. "Edward? What are you doing here?" In the dark… in my room… on my bed…
He interrupted the part of my question that I'd intentionally left off by saying, "Well, I guess my 'macking' sister peeled her lips off of Jasper long enough to call me and tell me to come over. She told me that Charlie was out for the night, and I was just sitting around my house, so I thought I'd come see if you wanted to watch a movie or something. But if you want to go back to sleep, I'll just go…" he trailed off, his grin still set firmly in place upon his lips.
"Oh no you don't," I said, grabbing his arm as he tried to leave the bed.
He chuckled, and as he fell down next to me on the bed, I scooted up next to him and lifted my head so he could put his arm under me. "Mmm," I said into his ear once I was nuzzled up next to him. "This is nice."
He nodded his head once and leaned over, placing his smiling lips to my own. I realized that he was exactly what I had been missing all day; the feel of Edward's lips upon my own was something I could never have enough of.
Our kiss started out slow and sweet, like it always did. After a few minutes, I moved closer to him, deepening the kiss, because I knew that Edward would pull away all too soon. He usually broke away from me first, saying we were going to get caught by either Alice, my dad, his parents, or whoever was around. It felt as though he had an excuse every time he pulled away.
I was kissing him with more urgency, fearing the one time we'd ever kissed on my bed – with the lights off no less – was shortly coming to an end. I was completely surprised when Edward moved toward me, and when he pulled my top lip in between his, I opened my eyes to watch his face.
His eyes were closed in concentration, and I found it incredibly sexy. When he parted his lips to close over my own once more, I traced my tongue along his upper lip and my actions were met with a small moan from him. He used his free arm to pull me closer to him from my hips, effectively aligning our bodies against each other's.
I felt his other had thread through my hair, and I realized that he had never been this close to me before physically. Edward was usually so guarded when we kissed. When we'd first started going out, I'd honestly thought that he wasn't that into me. Just recently though, he'd reminded me of the fact that we were only seventeen, in high school, and that he was nervous around my father.
Perhaps his control was wavering, or perhaps it was the fact that Charlie was currently twenty miles away, but when Edward thrust his tongue into my mouth and slid his right knee in between my legs, I could have cared less where his previous arguments had disappeared to.
I let myself get caught up in the sensation of it all and moaned into his mouth. He tensed next to me, and I instantly thought that I had crossed his invisible line, but he continued to kiss me in earnest. I was glad too, because I really didn't want him to stop. I slid my hand from where it was resting along his hip to the small of his back. When he'd turned toward me, his shirt had risen up a few inches, leaving the skin above his jeans exposed. I lightly ran my hand along his smooth skin before I crept up under his shirt.
He pulled his mouth from mine, but before I could protest, he kissed my neck and made his way down to the spot just under my ear. He'd only kissed me there once, and it had driven me absolutely crazy. I drew in a deep breath when his tongue darted out to trace the shell of my ear, and when his hand trailed beneath my tank top and came to rest on the clasp of my bra, I froze.
"Breathe, Bella," he whispered into my ear. "Is this, I mean, is it okay?"
I wasn't sure why we were going further than we ever had before, but I definitely wasn't complaining, so I nodded in response. After months of chaste kisses, I was beyond frustrated, and to tell the truth, I'd been aching for him to touch me for months.
The clasp came undone under his touch and he trailed his hand lightly over my skin, bringing it up my arm toward my face. He cupped my chin and brought my gaze to his own before he said, "I love you, Bella."
My eyes widened in surprise. We had never declared our feelings in so many words before. I knew that I loved him, but I'd been unsure whether to say it out loud or not. He shifted his weight, and I realized that I'd been quiet as I took in his words.
"I love you too, Edward," I said quietly. His lips were back on my own in no time, making me close my eyes in pleasure.
Edward shifted his weight once more, and my lips followed his as he moved. When I opened my eyes and found him above me, he reached behind his back with his left hand and pulled his shirt up and over his head. Even in the dim moonlight, I'd never seen anyone or anything as beautiful as Edward. He set his left arm back down to support his weight, and my eyes roamed over his bare chest to his broad shoulders until they landed upon his gaze.
When I saw the intensity brimming in his eyes, I drew in a shaky breath. I felt as though I could see straight into him and I was suddenly overwhelmed. My lips parted, and I whispered his name. Without breaking his gaze from my own, Edward sat back onto his knees and pulled me up into a sitting position. I pushed up with my hands, and trembled under his touch as he ran his thumb along the hem of my shirt.
When he slid the fabric over my skin, pulling it up and over my head, I kept my eyes locked on his, and I pushed my bra straps down my shoulders, letting them fall off of my arms. I'd never shown myself to anyone before and thought I would be nervous, but somehow I wasn't.
He leaned forward and placed his palms on the bed before returning his lips to my own. As I lowered myself back down to the bed, Edward gently parted my legs and came to rest between them. I looked up into his eyes as his right hand slid up my waist. His lips rested along my own as his warm palm cupped my breast, and my breath caught in my throat.
Edward softly kissed my lips once as he kneaded my flesh, and then trailed a line of kisses from my neck down to my collarbone. When I felt his hot breath on the swell of my right breast, I trembled beneath him. After a few agonizing moments, he finally took my nipple into his mouth, and I arched into him, causing him to moan into my skin.
The vibrations from his voice traveled down my chest, and when I felt the warmth of his palm on my inner thigh, every nerve ending between my legs was instantly alert.
Oh God, please touch me…
His palm trailed up my skin, leaving goose bumps in its wake. His lips parted from my skin, and he shifted his weight to his elbow. Looking into my eyes, Edward ran his hand up over my thigh until it landed on the button of my shorts. He dipped down to kiss my lips once more, and made quick work of undoing my button and zipper.
I kissed him back greedily, and when his hand grazed the sliver of skin just above my panties, I squirmed under his touch. He pulled the waistband away from my skin, slipping his hand underneath the cotton, and I gasped into his mouth when his fingers found my clit.
He pulled back to look into my eyes as he trailed his fingers further down. When he pressed slightly into me and gathered my wetness on his fingers, he brought them back to my clit.
I closed my eyes and my lips parted. Edward brought his mouth back down to my own and I kissed him deeply as his fingers moved against me. I was trembling under his touch, and when he thrust his tongue inside of my mouth, he pressed his finger into me at the same time.
I arched up into his hand, and when his thumb came to rest on my clit, I clutched at his shoulders to keep from breaking apart beneath him. He pulled out of me, and when he pushed back in, his thumb pressed down onto my clit once again. My body arched up off of the bed and I clenched around him, crying out in pleasure.
After I settled onto my back a moment later, I realized that Edward was shaking above me. I leaned up and kissed him as he placed both of his hands on either side of me for support. He was still shaking as I deepened our kiss, so I nudged his arm.
He broke our kiss to look into my eyes, and I told him to lie next to me. He lowered himself down and I nuzzled into his side while I kissed his neck and shoulder. He was still trembling, and I felt him bury his face in my hair. I smiled against his skin, and placed soft kisses along his neck.
I let my hand trail up his chest, and I longed to kiss him there. I trailed my kisses down from his neck, inching my way down to his collarbone and chest. When I kissed my way down his stomach, I glanced up to find his eyes closed and his lips parted.
The expression upon his face told me everything I needed to know, so I continued to kiss him while my fingers played along the skin just above his jeans. When I dipped my fingertip below his waistband, his hips twitched in response, so I undid his button and slowly pulled down his zipper to gauge his reaction.
I heard him draw in a deep breath and before he could stop my, I pushed my hand under the waistband of his boxers and wrapped it around his hard cock. His whole body tensed, and when I pumped him with my hand, he hissed with pleasure.
His hands fisted into the sheets as I once again started kissing his stomach. On impulse, I inched my body down his and kissed the head of his cock before I flicked my tongue out to taste him. I heard him moan and longed to make him do it again, so I parted my lips and took him into my mouth.
My ears were met with silence, and when I glanced up at Edward's face his eyes were shut tight and a grimace marred his features. I immediately pulled away from him. "Did I do something wrong?" I asked, sitting up and covering myself with a sheet. He laid still, his eyes still closed. "Did… You didn't like it?" I asked, the heat of my shame flooding my face.
Edward opened his eyes, and as he took in my pained expression, he said, "No, no, no, Bella. You didn't do anything wrong. It was me – it was my fault. Please don't be sad," he pleaded as tears pricked my eyes.
I tried to stop myself from crying, but once a tear spilled over my lower lid, I couldn't stop them from flowing freely down my cheeks. "Please… Please don't cry Bella," Edward said, reaching for my shoulders. I backed away from his touch, and he brought one hand to his hair, pulling it away from his scalp. "I'm an idiot," he whispered. "It was perfect, Bella. What you were doing was perfect. It was me. I shouldn't have let you…" he said, trailing off.
"What?" I asked, choking on my tears.
"I – I…" he said, trailing off once more, bringing his other hand up to cover his face.
"You should go," I said. My throat was dry and scratchy, and I knew he could hear the tears in my voice. I rolled over, burying my face in my pillow. I couldn't stand to see the pained expression on his face.
"I'll go if that's what you want, Bella," he said softly.
"Yes," I mumbled into my pillow. "Just go," I said, a fresh round of tears trailing down my cheeks.
A moment later I heard my door open and close and I strained my ears to listen as his muffled footsteps descended down the stairs. When I heard the front door close, quickly followed by the sound of a car starting outside, I knew he was gone.
I retrieved my tank top from the floor and shoved it back on before curling up on my bed and crying myself to sleep.
When I woke up the next morning, Alice was looking down at me. "Do you want to talk about it?" she asked.
I shook my head.
She sighed and picked up a strand of my hair from my pillow, twisting it around her fingers. "He looked pretty upset when he left last night," she began. "I think he was crying."
"What?" I asked, sitting up.
"Bella, I've never seen him cry before," she whispered.
"Oh Alice," I said, bringing my hands up to my face. "This is all my fault."
"He knew you were going to say that. When I talked to him this morning he wouldn't tell me what happened, but he said that it was his fault," she said, playing with a loose thread on my comforter.
I dropped my hands from my face, hoping that she would tell me what else he'd said. I opened my mouth to ask when it was that they'd spoken, when she looked at me and asked, "Did you… Did you guys break up?"
"No!" I said, perhaps a bit too loudly. She flinched at my tone, so I started again. "No. I… He told me that he loved me, Alice," I said softly. Her expression softened and I whispered, "I love him so much."
"Well then what happened, sweetie?" she asked. She could tell I was hesitant, so she said, "Its okay Bella," patting my knee. "You can tell me."
"Well, we kind of started messing around," I said, and I could feel the blush coloring my cheeks. "I…" I said, looking away from her gaze, "Well, we had never done that before, and I umm, put my mouth on him and… Well, I don't think that he liked it," I stammered, looking up into her face once I'd said it.
She looked confused. "He didn't like it?" she asked, cocking her head to the side.
"Umm, no, I don't think so," I said, biting my lip.
"What did you do, bite it?" she asked, smiling at me.
"God no," I replied, and I knew that my face was probably beet red.
"Bella, when is Charlie coming home?" she suddenly asked.
I was a bit taken aback at her sudden change of topic, but I looked over at my alarm clock to see what time it was. When I saw that it was still 7:45 in the morning – on a Saturday no less – I looked up her and yelled, "God Alice, why are you awake so early?"
She grinned at me and said, "Jasper and I kind of stayed up all night. Don't change the subject, Bella. When is Charlie coming home?"
"Uh," I started, scratching my head. "Well, he probably stayed up all night, so I'm thinking maybe sometime this afternoon. Why?" I asked, curious as to why she was suddenly so interested in my father's sleeping habits.
"Because I'm calling Edward," she said, standing up.
I opened my mouth to protest but she interrupted me and said, "Oh hush. You guys need to work this out."
I frowned at her, and when I thought back to what had happened between me and Edward last night, I brought my hands up to my face again.
"Don't you want to work this out?" Alice asked quietly.
"Of course I do, Alice. I love him," I whispered.
I heard a knock on my door, and when I dropped my hands I saw that Edward was standing in the hall. He looked like he hadn't slept all night. "Alice, can I speak to my girlfriend alone please?" he asked.
"Sure, Edward. Just be gentle with her," she told him. "Call me if you need me sweetie," she said, squeezing my shoulder before leaving us alone in my room.
I quickly wiped my eyes with the back of my hand and turned towards Edward. "How long have you been standing there?"
"Long enough to hear that you still love me," he said quietly. "After what I did to you last night, I'm surprised to hear that." He walked over to the foot of the bed at sat down.
"Of course I still love you Edward," I said, looking into his eyes. He seemed so closed off and distant, even though he was less than a foot away from me. "I just don't understand what happened…"
"I don't know what to say," he whispered, looking down.
I couldn't bear to see him like this; he was a mess. I brought my hand up to his face and cupped his chin in my hand, forcing his eyes back to my own. "Edward," I said softly, "Do you love me?"
His eyes widened as he said, "Yes, Bella, more than anything. Don't ever doubt my love for you. I just, I just…"
"You what?" I asked, desperate for him to let me in.
"I hate myself," he said as he closed his eyes.
"What do you mean?" I asked, dropping my hand from his face.
His shoulders slumped and he said, "I don't deserve you, Bella. You're so beautiful, and I'm so…" he said, trailing off.
"Edward, please. Please just tell me what you're thinking," I said, grasping his hands with my own.
He opened his eyes. "I don't know what it is, but when you were kissing my neck last night and I smelled your hair," he began, but I cut him off.
"That was one of my favorite parts."
"Mine too," he whispered. "But it was almost too much. And then… then you… and your mouth…" he stammered.
I squeezed his hands and said, "Now you're not making any sense. Edward, just tell me. You know you can tell me anything, right?"
"You'll hate me," he said, dropping his eyes to where our hands were intertwined in his lap.
I squeezed his hands once again and said, "Edward, please look at me." His eyes met my own, and I said, "Nothing you could say could ever make me hate you."
Edward closed his eyes again and took in a deep breath. "It's your hair, Bella," he said, and opened his eyes.
This was not exactly what I had expected for him to say, so I was confused. "My hair makes you hate yourself?" I asked.
"Well," he began, looking back down at our hands. "I love the way your hair smells," he said, looking back up at me sheepishly. I smiled at him, urging him to continue. "And when you put your mouth… Well, you were driving me crazy."
"You were driving me crazy last night too, Edward," I said softly.
"But that's different, Bella."
"How is it different, Edward? Why didn't you want me to put my… Why couldn't I put my mouth on you? Why did you want me to stop?"
"I was afraid," he said quietly.
"What were you afraid of?" I asked him, hoping that he would just tell me the truth for once.
"The smell of your hair was driving me crazy. I wanted to do things to you that I've never even dreamed about, Bella," he said, looking into my eyes once more. "When you put your mouth on me, I had to chew my tongue off so that I wouldn't say the things that were tumbling around in my head."
"Well why didn't you? Why didn't you just say what you wanted to say, Edward?"
"I don't think that you would have liked my words, Bella. I wasn't in my right mind," he said. He bit his lip and I could swear I saw a slight pink tinge to his cheeks.
"Oh," I said. "So, you were going to say something… but you stopped yourself? I still don't understand, Edward."
"Bella," he said, his cheeks now beet red. "I wanted to tell you things. I wanted to tell you how it felt," he said. When I opened my mouth to speak again, he cut me off and said, "I wanted to tell you how it felt to watch you come. I wanted to tell you that I wanted to watch you come again and again for me. I wanted to tell you how it felt to have my cock in your mouth. I knew that you wouldn't want to hear any of those things, so I literally bit my tongue and I guess you noticed the face I made right after, but I had to stop myself. I'm so sorry, Bella. It's not your fault."
I took a moment to process all he'd said. A sly grin appeared on my lips and I asked, "All of this started because you smelled my hair?"
He looked down at his hands and nodded.
I sighed and his shoulders slumped down. "Well then… Let's go," I said, standing and pulling him up with.
"Where are we going?" he asked as we rose from the bed.
"You sir, have a date with my shampoo," I replied with a grin.
"No, Bella. You don't understand," he said, dropping my hand and backing away.
I grinned at him and walked forward, saying, "Oh but I do understand, Edward. You're a dirty boy and you need a shower."
I wasn't sure were my new found confidence was coming from, but I didn't care. I wanted – no I needed to do this. If that meant that I had to take charge, then I would.
He was shaking his head still, and I was slowly backing him out of my bedroom. "Bella, please," he said. I grinned at him as we reached the bathroom, and I pushed on his chest until he was forced to walk in. Once I had him where I wanted him, I turned around and locked the door. I was going to make this good for him even if I had to drown trying.
He stood by the sink and I knew he was battling with himself on whether to stay or go. I bent over the tub and turned on the warm water with a smirk, knowing that I'd get my way.
"Bella," he said quietly. "I don't think this is such a good idea."
I pulled up on the lever, and the warm water poured out of the showerhead. "Sure it is," I said, turning toward him. "Don't you trust me?"
I stood, and pulled my tank top off. Then, I slowly pulled down my shorts and panties. Once I stepped out of them, I chanced a look at Edward, and found him biting his lower lip. "So, are you gonna come in?" I asked as I entered the tub. "Or do I have to drag you in myself?"
"Umm," he started, "I'll come in."
As he pulled his shirt up over his head, I realized that he was still in his clothes from last night. I turned toward the streaming hot water as he pulled off his jeans, not wanting all of him to be revealed to me just yet.
I felt the heat being contained around us as Edward closed the shower curtain, and knew that he was standing just behind me in the tub. "Edward," I called over my shoulder. "Could you hand me that body wash over there?"
"Uh, yeah," he answered. "Which one? There's a few over here."
"One of the pink ones, please." I grinned as I watched him turn around.
This was my chance. I quickly grabbed my strawberry shampoo and poured it into my hair, lathering it thoroughly.
He turned back around to see me with my hands plunged into my soapy hair, and said, "Oh God, Bella."
Gathering my new found confidence, I backed up purposefully into him. He moaned as the scent of my shampoo filled the small, steamy bathroom.
"Do you know what you're doing to me?"
I bit my lip and continued walking backward until Edward's back was flush with the tiled shower wall. When I felt his erection pressed into the small of my back, I turned my head to face him. "No Edward," I said innocently. "Why don't you tell me what I'm doing?"
The suds from my hair had run down my back, so when I pressed myself into him, we were slippery against each other. He growled into my ear as his hands shot into my hair. "God Bella, you smell so sweet," he said as he trailed his fingers down my neck. "I don't know what it is, but… Do you remember that summer two years ago when you went with my family to the lake house?"
"Yes, I remember," I answered as I arched my back, effectively pushing my ass against him. I definitely remembered that trip. It was the first time I'd realized that I wanted Edward this way. We'd been out by the lake one afternoon when I noticed how the sun reflected off of his bare arms and chest. I'd never felt that way for a boy, and the thought of him then, coupled with how he was kissing my neck now was driving me wild.
"We were alone," he whispered into my ear. "You were wearing that little red bikini, and when you got out of the lake, the water was dripping down your arms, your stomach, and your legs. I was fascinated with you, and when you bent over the picnic basket I had to adjust my cock so that you wouldn't see how hard I was. And then when you turned around to offer me a strawberry, I nearly came in my shorts," he said before pulling the shell of my ear between his lips.
"Oh yes, I remember," I said, knowing exactly what was about to happen. He was beginning to thrust toward my hips, and I was beginning to tremble under his touch.
"You had already popped a strawberry into your sweet mouth, and the juices were flowing down your neck," he whispered as he trailed his hand down my neck. "It dribbled down in between your breasts," he said as he continued the path the juice had made with his hands. I shivered under his touch.
"And then… Then that damn red juice trailed down your stomach." He pushed his hand down my stomach and in between my now quaking legs. When his fingers found my clit, I began to pant.
"I wanted to rip that damn bikini off," he said roughly as his other hand found my breast. "I wanted to lick that juice off of your neck. I wanted to lick you from your breasts down to your pussy," he whispered into my ear.
My eyes rolled back into my head. He had never talked to me like this before. He'd never been so… so demanding before.
"I want to lick you to see if you tasted like that sweet, ripe strawberry I can smell in your hair right now," he growled into my ear before he pushed his finger inside of me. My back arched and he pulled roughly on my nipple.
When he pulled out of me, I watched as he brought his hand up to his lips to taste me. "You taste better than any fucking strawberry," he whispered into my ear. "Now rinse this stuff out of your hair," he said, pushing me toward the abandoned stream of water. "I only want to smell you."
I walked forward in a daze and closed my eyes as the water streamed down my face. I turned around with the guidance of Edward's hands upon my hips, and leaned back to rinse the shampoo from my hair. Reaching up with trembling hands, I made sure that it was all rinsed out. I was glad that Edward had kept his hands on my hips, because I all but fell over when I felt his hot breath fan out over my inner thigh.
My eyes flew open and I bent my head to look down at him as water poured down my face. He was on his knees before me, and he pulled me forward so that the water hit my lower back. When he grabbed my right leg and set my foot up on the lip of the tub, he said, "You smell better than any damn shampoo."
I reached out to brace myself on the shower wall when his tongue flicked out to taste me. "Your sweet cunt is fifty times better than any damn strawberry, Bella."
My legs started shaking as he licked me again; I didn't know how much longer I'd be able to stand up. "Edward," I moaned, and just when I thought I couldn't take any more, he thrust his tongue up inside of me.
I swayed on my feet, and he steadied me before standing and pulling me out of the shower. Sweeping my body up behind my neck and knees, he carried me, still dripping wet and naked, back to my room, kicking my door shut behind him.
Edward laid me gently back down onto my bed, just as he had done the night before. When he positioned himself between my thighs, he bent his head down to my heaving chest and said, "Your breasts are perfect, Bella. No strawberry could be riper than your perfect pink nipples."
When his tongue laved at my right breast, I arched up into his caressing touch.
"I want to taste you undiluted," he murmured into my heaving chest. "If I thought you tasted good in the shower with the scent of that damn shampoo filling my nose, I can only imagine how much sweeter your pussy is without it."
Kissing his way back down between my legs, I was grateful for the support of the mattress beneath me. I was all but trembling, ready to shake apart, when his tongue darted out to taste me for the second time. My body moved of its own accord, rocking into his mouth, making his tongue touch me wherever I wanted it to.
"Fuck, Bella… You taste so God damned good," Edward said. My eyes rolled back into my head in pleasure with his words, but when he plunged his tongue inside of me again, I had to grab my pillow to muffle my screams.
"No," Edward demanded, pulling it away from me. "I want to hear you. Your noises drive me wild."
"It's you…" I whimpered. "You're doing this. You're making me scream. Edward," I whispered. "Please, Edward."
"Please what?" he asked coyly.
"Please take me," I said grabbing him from under his arms to pull his body up over mine once more. When his body was situated between my thighs again, I leaned up and kissed him hard, tasting myself on his lips and tongue.
"Can you feel how wet you've made me?" I asked as he grazed my opening.
"Shit, Bella. You were so wet and tight for me in the shower. I could smell your sweet juices even over that shampoo. And you smell so much better than it. And you taste…" I stopped him by plunging my tongue into his mouth again.
"How do I feel?" I asked into his open mouth while guiding his hips toward mine.
Pressing slightly into me, Edward looked down into my eyes. When he saw his own lust mirrored within my own, and the look of longing and trust I was trying to convey with just one look, he pushed forward and slowly entered me. I kept my eyes locked on his until he was fully sheathed within my accepting body.
When the pain I'd been expecting never came, I figured that maybe our bodies fit together naturally, and that perhaps I'd just been ready for him, ready for this moment. But it didn't matter; nothing else mattered in that moment besides the fact that we were now connected.
When he starting rocking back and forth into me, I let my eyes roll back into my head once again from the pleasure he was giving me. "Edward," I whispered.
"Bella," he said into my ear. "Look at me Bella."
I opened my eyes, only to find a slow fire burning in his. "I've wanted you for so long. Even before that day at the lake. I never knew though… I never knew you would feel this good."
"How do I feel?" I asked him again. He felt indescribable. It was too much to put into words. My body arched toward his and rocked with his every move.
"It's too much, Bella. It's too fucking much," he cried into my hair.
"I want you," I said. "I've always wanted you… Take me Edward. Take me the way you want to take me," I pleaded.
He rocked back onto his knees, leaving me perpendicular to him. "I want you too, Bella," he said. "I've always wanted you."
"Tell me," I begged.
"I've wanted to fuck you," he grunted with a deep thrust.
"Fuck me," I screamed.
"I wanted to be the first one inside of you."
"You're the only one," I said, thrashing my head from side to side on my pillow. His thrusts became increasingly deeper, and I felt like my whole body was on the verge of exploding.
"I want to be deep inside of you."
When he thrust forward again, I pushed up to meet him. Edward started to pant, and in a domineering voice, he said, "I'm the only one who gets to be inside of you."
"Yes, Edward. Yes… You're the only one. You've always been the only one."
"I'm the only one who makes you fucking scream," he shouted, pushing into me deeper than he'd been before.
I let out a low moan as I clamped down on his cock from the inside. Waves of pure, undiluted pleasure pulsed from my hands up my arms, then rippled down to my stomach and legs, making my toes curl, before it pulsed back to my fast-beating heart.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck," Edward chanted while still pumping into me. I bucked up into him one last time, my muscles still clamping down around him in orgasm, when I felt him release into me.
After a few moments, Edward fell forward, catching himself with his hands. He breathed heavily into my neck and hair, sending a few strands of it swirling around my skin. His weight upon my still over-excited body was reassuring, and I couldn't help but wrap my arms around him just as he wrapped one around me.
When he pulled out of me a moment later, breaking our connection, I pouted. But when he rolled over, taking my body with his, I snuggled up to his bare chest, and Edward showered my face with small kisses.
"I love you," he whispered into my hair.
"I love you, too."
Just then, I heard him inhale deeply.
"Where you just sniffing my hair again?" I asked, a small smile forming on my lips.
"Yes," he replied, and I could hear his smile in his voice. "I love that damn shampoo."
I smiled back. "Yeah, me too."
A/N: Alright, so this was my first ever venture into fan-fiction. It was the first story I ever posted, and I just about died when the first little trickle of reviews slowly started coming in. When I came back to read it recently, I cringed… so I've done a few edits. I've kept the story intact, but changed a few minor things like grammar and punctuation mistakes. Thanks to everyone out there who reads & reviews. It still makes me squee like an idiot when this silly story of mine gets reviewed!